Owning Your Worth: Move From Self-Neglect To Self-Respect

Move From Self-Neglect To Self-Respect is a transformative talk designed to help you break free from patterns of self-doubt and neglect, and step into the empowered truth of who you are. Together, we’ll explore how to release the subtle ways you may diminish yourself, reclaim your inner strength, and cultivate the deep respect your Soul has always held for you. This session will inspire you to honor your needs, trust your value, and create a more authentic, loving relationship with yourself.

Transcript

Understanding this topic on owning your worthiness,

Moving from self-neglect into self-respect is a part of everyone's spiritual journey.

And it's the beginning part of our journey.

It doesn't come later once you've got all these other things established.

Once I got self-love and self-esteem,

And then I'm gonna let the worth in.

No,

You won't let any of those other things in until you value yourself.

And yet we spend decades and eons trying to be valued by others,

Trying to prove ourselves,

Trying to perform and be whatever we have decided is lovable to be.

We try to fit ourselves as a square hole within a round peg.

We try to fit these together and it just doesn't work because you need to understand the nature of worth isn't something that you can do.

It's a realization that you have.

It's an expansion of understanding the big picture,

Not just the ego's personality,

Self's little picture,

Which is always born out of feeling I'm not enough.

There's something wrong with me.

As you reclaim your worth,

And as you choose to respect yourself,

You can heal and mature that limited,

Sometimes very self-sabotaging ego that we all have to contend with on our spiritual journey coming home.

We all have an ego and that ego feels it's not good enough.

When you own your value and worth,

You feel safe and secure around anyone and everything because you know who you are and you know that you matter.

You know you have value.

You honor your uniqueness and difference,

Your passions and your strengths because often our passions and strengths are something that most people don't feel worthy of exploring.

They feel guilty.

I've got to deal with all my duties and obligations first,

Then I'll be worthy to enjoy my life.

It's kind of like saying,

I've got to get my life together,

Then I'll learn to love myself.

Well,

You won't get your life together until you love yourself,

Until you value yourself,

Until you are the core and the source of everything you experience in your life.

To see the big picture,

The empowered journey,

Self-worth is a major part of that journey,

Is the foundation that you need to have before you will love yourself,

Before you will feel confident,

Before you will feel worthiness,

You need a sense of self-worth.

On this spiritual destination in life,

We always have two different end results.

We could either listen to our ego,

Our limited personality self,

Which can only gather information by the five physical senses,

Only focuses on logic and reason,

And more likely is conditioned to believe what other people have told you about yourself,

About other people,

And about your relationship to life.

When you can embrace your self-worth,

When you can reclaim it,

For it's there,

It's often buried beneath the pain,

The frustration,

The conditioning,

The limiting beliefs that you've collected in this lifetime,

But it wasn't there originally.

And that's important to recognize because the original source of your consciousness,

Who you are,

Is a powerful,

Majestic spiritual being.

On your journey,

You decided to know thyself,

The unique expression of the divine that you are.

And every human being is a spiritual being.

Every human being comes from the same source.

Now,

The difference between the Pope and a bum down the road that just finished his bottle from last night,

It's not that one is more worthy than the other.

They have equal amounts of worth,

But one recognizes it and is conscious of their worth.

The other has denied it.

That's what free will choice is about on our journey.

As we move forward,

As you understand that you have two different destinations,

One that's designed and built by our limited personality self,

Which is our ego,

It's based upon the little story or the limited conception and perception of who you've become based on your upbringing,

Your conditioning,

Your race,

Your religion.

All of the things that make you the unique individual you are was often given to you by very well-meaning adults and authority figures in your life,

From teachers to big brothers and sisters.

You didn't question it.

You just bought it hook,

Line,

And sinker.

But you needed to do that in order to ground yourself here as a spiritual being,

You needed to have beliefs.

When you were young,

You didn't have the mental capacity to think about beliefs.

So you adopted others.

You adopted some of the limiting beliefs when you were inside of your mother's womb for nine months.

Some of her beliefs were transferred while she was pregnant with you.

We come here and our beliefs and our consciousness needs to become grounded.

If we're gonna bring a spiritual being,

Which is pure energy,

Into the physical world,

We need to have a way to understand it and self-reflect.

Part of our consciousness is divided.

We have the personality,

Ego,

Limited self that's based upon the illusion,

The physical world,

Where you were born,

Your upbringing,

All the things I mentioned.

That's the part that we over-identify with most often.

That's also the part after 20,

30,

40 years,

And you are on this hamster wheel thinking,

Well,

If I could only get more education,

If I can only get a better job,

If I can only make more money,

If I can only find a partner,

If I can only blah,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah.

The if-onlys of the ego is never-ending because it's looking in the wrong place.

It's looking outside of itself to establish what only can be done from within is to recognize who you truly are.

As we embark upon the empowered journey,

We have to become self-aware,

To know thyself.

Then,

Once we become aware,

We need to accept ourself,

Our uniqueness,

Our individuality,

Our quirks,

Our hangups,

Whatever you wanna call them,

Just to accept and embrace the part of you,

The limited part of you called your ego,

Who you've become,

To embrace the ugly side sometimes,

To embrace the limitations,

The addictive patterns,

Because only when you can acknowledge and are aware,

You seek to understand,

Can you change anything.

Self-awareness that leads to self-acceptance is the very first part that begins the spiritual empowered journey,

Where you expand your consciousness and recognize that you're not just what you have,

You're not just what you do,

You're not the degrees on the wall,

You're not the status of your lifestyle is,

You're so much more.

Those are all things we've become,

And that's how the ego identifies.

Beneath it all,

The original part of you is an electromagnetic life force that is consciousness,

That is your soul and your spirit,

That is your true self that has been around for eternity and will continue this journey beyond this physical lifetime.

When you can start to open up and recognize,

Which is the second step of the empowered journey,

Is that you have both in a world of duality,

That limited ego and you have an empowered self.

For the most part,

You develop the limited personality for the first half of your life.

And then you wake up in the middle of life,

You realize the whole way is truly lost.

Everything you've attempted to do doesn't seem to be producing what you want.

You don't know what you wanted to do.

You might've followed all the rules,

You might've gotten married when you got out of college or high school,

You raised kids and you got the house and you became successful in your business,

But there's something missing.

Why don't I feel happy and whole?

What else is there?

And the midlife awakening is often the platform and stage where we then give birth and we begin to align and become more conscious of the eternal part of us,

The goodness of who you are.

When you look back in your childhood with all the challenges you went through,

In my experience of teaching for 35 years,

I don't know anyone who had a functional family.

I really don't know anybody I've met that has had it all laid out and was perfect and didn't have any problems because the whole point of being here is to grow and to evolve.

Reminds me of that old saying,

Smooth seas do not make a great sailor.

Half of our life,

We're trying to figure ourselves out.

We're trying to understand who we are.

We're trying to fit in and belong.

We're trying to get approval and praise because we don't accept ourselves because we don't feel that who we are is inherently worthy of being loved.

Because we identified with what happened in our childhood,

We listened to very well-meaning parents who were just trying to contain us as wild little children and said things that we absorbed and became part of us.

This is about an unlearning.

It's about retrieving the power and deciding which part of me am I going to move forward with?

I know very well the path of the limited personality self,

The little S.

That path ultimately leads to mediocrity at best or self-destruction at worst.

A sense of emptiness and meaninglessness that you do everything to avoid feeling,

To numb out through addiction cycles.

That's what often happens.

You see this in people that are super successful on the surface.

You know,

They're kids,

They're family and a happy marriage.

They have great job,

They make a lot of money.

They go on vacation every other month,

But there's something missing and they know it.

There becomes the hunger and thirst for your spirituality,

For your spiritual nature.

That awakens in the middle of life for most people.

It creates sometimes very profound midlife changes.

It always produces a crisis.

The level and degree that crisis manifests hinges upon how you've been listening only to your ego and have denied your soul and spirit.

Now you cannot get rid of your soul and spirit.

It will sit and wait patiently for you.

It will wait patiently,

Giving you lots of opportunities to grow throughout your entire life.

So it's not like you haven't grown and changed and evolved from the time you were born.

Of course you have,

But the super amazing transformation that you're waiting for is waiting for you.

But you have to know that you are worthy of receiving it and aligning with it without guilt.

To get to know thyself.

And then when you get to know the self,

That is the capital S,

That you have a soul and spirit,

The eternal part of you,

Then the next step is to recognize and own the value and worth of who you are,

A spiritual being.

The divine doesn't create anything flawed or defective.

It's only our belief and thoughts and attitude from what we experienced through the eyes of the ego,

The limited perception that we judged,

Hear that word,

Ourselves as unworthy.

We judged ourselves as flawed or broken or defective.

And it's just not true.

It never has been true.

But in the meantime,

You write a whole story about what life is,

Who you are and all the struggles and pains and all the challenges you suffer and struggle and go through all the things,

Giving your power away to people and to circumstances until like I mentioned,

You often end up in a crisis in the middle of life.

But self-worth isn't something you do or earn.

You already have it.

It's something you discover and reveal that's always been there beneath the pain and the fear and the games and the limiting beliefs is the true essence of your being.

And think for a moment,

When you look back at all the challenges you went through in your childhood,

And you're here today listening to me,

You could have given up.

Maybe some of you tried,

But you're still here.

Regardless of how difficult and challenging those experiences were in your childhood,

Think about how strong,

Courageous and willing you were to continue to find love.

I'll be it in a lot of the wrong places,

But that desire,

That hunger,

That thirst to become whole,

To experience the love is in your spiritual DNA.

The only problem is we let our ego try to find it outside of ourselves and it never ever is enough,

Can never make up for our lack.

And in so many ways,

Our ego isn't enough to make your life work.

You need the dual whole self,

Both the little S,

The personality,

And the big S,

The true self.

You need both to come together and work together because it's only your spiritual self that can heal and mature the ego from an enemy into an ally.

They work together as one,

Functioning together.

You understand your ego personality has fear,

Plays games,

Loves to be in control,

But you choose not to let it.

You take your power back from it.

You understand it's games.

It's not your ego making the choice or has the power,

You do.

But when you recognize that,

Yeah,

I've believed a lie,

A little story that wasn't a mistake.

It wasn't wrong because there's a lot you can understand about yourself from what you went through,

The rough seas that made you the strong sailor you are today.

But those qualities such as courage,

Determination,

Love,

Beauty,

Imagination,

All of those qualities that you had as a child were part of your soul and spirit.

It's part of who you are.

You were resilient through it all.

So getting off your own back and stop beating yourself up,

Beginning to accept that your past and everything you experienced in it from the family members to the sibling,

To the abuse,

To the trauma,

Everything that you went through was part of your path.

It wasn't a mistake.

When you get that,

You can begin to recognize that you are so much more than the limited ego self.

You are a spiritual being.

You stepped down and gave your power away so that you would have the motivation and the contrast of what you do want in life.

You became the victim feeling powerless so that you would desire to become empowered.

You created in this world of duality,

The struggle so that you could learn to move into elegance.

When I say the word elegance,

I'm talking about the scientific term,

Not the fashion sense here.

The elegance in science is the least amount of energy for the maximum results where life is easy.

You move beyond struggle.

And that's one of the benefits of owning self-worth when you recognize who you are.

Reviews

I love this. I love the format, recorded as if we are having a conversation. Easy to digest. Potent. Thank you for this lecture. Lots of great reminders. I am ready to take my power back! 😇