And before we even start our practice session today,
I invite us to take a moment to pause,
Whether that's lying down,
Standing up,
Seated,
Eyes open,
Eyes closed,
Just inviting you to feel any points of contact from beneath the body.
So that may be support from the cushions or chair,
Beneath that,
The felt sense of the earth supporting the body.
And if it feels supportive for your practice,
Maybe inviting in the deepest inhale that you've breathed in today.
So inhaling to fill the lungs and long extended exhale.
If it feels good,
Let's do that a couple more times.
Deep inhale,
Letting something go with the exhale.
And as we've paused,
Just noticing if there's any parts of the body that require some stretching,
Some shifting,
Some movement,
Feeling really welcome to move your body at any point during this session.
And this is going to be a 40 minute session.
I'm going to offer a short reflection on our theme,
Which is Metta,
And then we're going to go into a practice together.
So Metta,
The Pali word for loving kindness.
In Sanskrit,
The word is Maitri and the root of the word is Mitra,
Which means friend.
So loving kindness is often translated as this feeling of friendliness,
This feeling of well intentions towards ourselves and towards others.
And I wanted to speak a little bit about maybe a helpful attitude that we can bring when we're practicing Metta,
When we're practicing loving kindness.
And the first thing I find helpful to remember is that it is a good intention practice,
But not necessarily a good feeling practice.
So sometimes when we practice Metta,
Good feelings may arise and we can allow them to be there.
We can lean into them.
But some days we might be feeling very stressed.
We may be feeling really annoyed or some other difficult feeling,
But we can still hold that good intention for ourselves and others.
So I might be feeling very agitated,
But I might still say to myself,
May I be at ease?
Because in the in the Buddhist teachings,
Metta,
This heart quality,
The first of these four heart qualities we're going to be exploring,
All of these heart qualities are inherent in those teachings.
It's called the Chitta,
So the heart mind.
So it's an inherent quality,
Which means we don't need to magic it out of anywhere.
And sometimes it's described as a seed.
So if we can imagine that it's a seed in the soil of our hearts and minds,
Each time we practice it,
It's like watering the seed.
So sometimes actually the practice is a practice of trust,
That we're not quite sure when the fruits of this practice will emerge,
But we know that we're taking care of it each time we're watering that seed.
And I found this really helpful because I personally found it very challenging to practice Metta at the beginning,
Particularly because I experienced a lot of self-criticism,
A lot of self-judgment when I first started practice.
But slowly,
Slowly,
I had trust to keep going with the practice.
I needed some encouragement from others to engage in this way.
And I distinctively remember that I was on retreat.
I can be a bit clumsy at times,
And I stubbed my toe.
And I could notice my inner dialogue,
You know,
About to go.
You know,
You're so clumsy.
But,
You know,
It said it's OK.
That inner dialogue had changed to something friendly and warm.
It's OK.
It's OK.
It's OK to do this.
So maybe the fruits of our practice will come much later.
And I think it's helpful to see it as a seed that's inherent,
So we can let go of this sense of needing to strive or achieve to try and get somewhere that maybe we're not there yet.
I really appreciated this quote by a Buddhist teacher called Bob Sharples,
Who says,
You know,
We're really letting go of this subtle aggression of self-improvement.
We're letting go of that subtle aggression of self-improvement.
I also wanted to mention that loving kindness isn't weak.
It's inherently very strong.
At times,
It might be very fierce,
Very active.
It's not passive.
And it really allows us to feel grounded in our hearts,
Bodies and minds to then offer an appropriate response when,
For example,
We witness or we are subject to inappropriate or harmful actions from others.
So loving kindness can be the foundation from which we offer an appropriate response.
But we act not from a place of hatred.
We act from this place of love.
The Buddha once said,
Hatred can never cease by hatred.
Hatred can only cease by love.
This is an internal law.
And we can see that by,
You know,
From so many of our beloved peace activists,
Martin Luther King Jr.
,
Thich Nhat Hanh,
They all acted to stop harm.
But they did it from a place of love.
You know,
They didn't do it from a place of hatred.
And if there was any enemy,
You know,
They really saw ignorance as the enemy.
They saw discrimination as the enemy rather than a you versus me.
So with this practice,
We begin with ourselves.
We begin with ourselves.
And the beloved Toni Morrison wrote,
You know,
You are your best thing.
So we begin with ourselves.
And,
Yeah,
We begin with ourselves because if we really,
Truly understand ourselves and we understand how we can create the conditions for warmth,
Friendliness,
Kindness,
Joy,
Happiness within ourselves,
That then allows us to have that capacity to offer that towards others.
So some people say,
Oh,
Is loving kindness to myself?
Is that that feels selfish?
That feels self-centered?
But actually,
We see it as not separate.
Myself and others aren't separate.
But if I can really,
Truly spend the time to understand myself,
To know how I can cultivate this beautiful,
Loving energy in me,
Then I will know how to appropriately respond also to the people in my life,
The other beings that we inhabit this world with.
And actually doing that,
Having that understanding really prevents maybe what's sometimes called the near enemy of metta,
The near enemy of loving kindness,
Which is a sticky attachment,
Which is more,
You know,
I'm going to care for you,
But these are the conditions for which I demand from you as well.
So we're kind of letting go of that sticky attachment.
OK,
So let's practice together.
And I'm going to offer a practice that I personally found really helpful in my own practice,
And that was to find specific loving kindness phrases for myself.
So some of you may have heard classical metta phrases such as,
You know,
May I be at ease,
May I be happy,
Really beautiful words that we can really lean on when we feel drawn to.
But I've also found it really helpful to find phrases that really speak to my heart at any one time.
So that's what we're going to be exploring together.
