50 Traits Of Narcissistic Personalities

In this podcast episode, Lisa, a seasoned life coach, fearlessly shares her wealth of experience to unveil the 50 distinctive traits that define narcissistic individuals. Drawing from her vast reservoir of knowledge, she dissects the behavioral patterns that characterize narcissistic personalities, shedding light on the intricacies that often go unnoticed.
So, if you've ever been struggling with a narcissistic individual and felt like your voice was being drowned out, this podcast is a must-listen.
Discover how to effectively communicate, set boundaries, and take the reins of your own life back into your hands.

Transcript

Welcome to the Breakdown to Breakthrough Podcast.

My name is Lisa A.

Romano.

I am a life coach,

Best-selling author,

YouTube vlogger,

Meditation teacher,

And expert in the field of codependency and narcissistic abuse.

I am a believer in the power of an organized mind.

My aim is to help people learn what it means to live above the veil of consciousness rather than living a reactive life.

May your heart feel blessed,

Your mind feel expanded,

And your spirit find hope as you spend time with me here at the Breakdown to Breakthrough Podcast.

I decided today to give you a quick video of what I feel are 50 traits of narcissistic personalities.

I like to say narcissistic traits opposed to NPD because NPD is something that a professional psychologist or psychiatrist should be able to diagnose in someone.

Narcissistic personality disorder is very different than dealing with people in our everyday life who present with narcissistic traits.

I think that the more aware we are about narcissistic traits and codependent traits,

The more confident we'll feel in everyday relationships.

Before I knew I was codependent,

I was like a sitting duck.

I was attracting all sorts of people who had narcissistic traits who were violating my boundaries and I had no idea that I even had a right to assert a boundary.

I literally was like a feather in the wind.

So whoever wanted to abuse me and say whatever they wanted to say to me,

They said whatever they wanted to say,

And I didn't even know how to acknowledge my pain.

The 50 shades of narcissistic personality traits.

Number one,

Narcissists have the ability to fake empathy.

Not every narcissist that you meet will be grandiose and will smell good and will actually appear like he or she thinks they are better than everybody else.

Be aware,

Dear ones,

Not every narcissist actually comes off like they are grandiose.

Sometimes narcissists have the ability,

And very often they have the ability to actually fake empathy.

Number two,

Not every narcissist you meet will be boastful.

Number three,

Narcissists can actually appear to be quite humble.

People with narcissistic traits and people who are narcissistic know how to manipulate others into trusting and believing in them.

This is the goal of a narcissist or somebody who has a narcissistic personality or who suffers with narcissistic traits.

Once the narcissistic personality knows you trust them,

That's when you start to feel like you're being swept around and abused.

But a narcissistic person cannot play out this dynamic unless they have someone who is able to be manipulated into trusting them.

Number five,

A narcissist's intention is to fool and manipulate others into believing they are more intelligent,

Wiser,

Richer,

Or more sexually robust than anyone they know.

Number six,

Eventually you will discover that a narcissist will begin spending time telling other people just how special they are.

Sometimes a narcissist will begin talking about how smart they are or they'll start bragging about their special achievements or their special skills.

Lots of times it's a bunch of BS.

You've got to be careful when you're studying,

And so many of us on YouTube are studying this and I think we should,

But you have to be careful that you don't think about narcissistic personalities in a box.

Narcissists show up with very different types of traits.

If you're a man,

You'll present with certain types of traits more than others.

If you're a female,

You present with different traits as well.

More often than not,

It's the female that plays victim for the purpose of gaining the man's attention or the partner's attention.

This makes it very difficult for a man,

Let's say in this situation,

Who has fallen in love with a female narcissist to hold her accountable.

Number seven,

Narcissists as a general rule tend to monopolize conversations and rarely ask if ever asked others about themselves unless they have an ulterior motive to do so.

Number eight,

Narcissists crave external validation in the form of power over others.

They are not willing to do for others as a codependent would do to gain validation.

They manipulate and coerce validation from others.

The goal is power and control.

Number nine,

Narcissists lack empathy for the people in their lives.

Number 10,

Narcissists are actually annoyed when their partners,

Children,

Or friends begin sharing about their feelings.

They have absolutely no time for what you're going through.

Number 11,

Narcissists refuse to acknowledge the feelings of others and oftentimes will mock others for sharing what they feel.

It doesn't happen all the time.

Very early on in the relationship,

A true narcissist with NPD or someone with a narcissistic personality who has the traits of a narcissist,

They will wait and they'll let you think,

They'll let this game play out where you really think that they care about your feelings,

But over time as the relationship begins to evolve,

You will notice that the narcissist really doesn't have time for your feelings.

12,

Narcissists tend to use sex as a form of control.

Number 13,

Narcissists tend to use or tend to associate power with sex.

Number 14,

Female as well as male narcissists often use their sexual prowess as a lure to hook others into their web.

Number 15,

Narcissists tend to not like other people who appear to be self-confident.

Narcissists will mock or knock a beautiful woman.

If you're a female narcissist,

You have no patience or you feel very threatened by other beautiful women.

Even if they're the kindest thing that ever walked the face of God's green earth,

You will find something to pick on about that person.

If you are a male narcissist,

You are threatened by other men who are successful or other men who appeal confident or other men who just are liked by other people,

You will have a problem with men you don't even know because you are intimidated by this person and this is not a person you will be able to manipulate and control.

Number 16,

Narcissistic people seek out those who are kind because they know kind people will have a difficult time confronting them when things go wrong.

Number 17,

Narcissists as a general rule always act like they are incredibly interested in you when you begin a relationship with them.

Number 18,

Narcissists oftentimes act as if they are interested in the same things you are as a way to begin indoctrinating you into trusting them.

That happened to me.

I met a,

I think,

Psychopathic narcissist when I was single and I felt so encouraged when I met him because he seemed to like everything that I liked and he seemed to enjoy all the kinds of things that I enjoyed.

As time went on,

I realized that it was all a ploy to get me hooked.

19,

Narcissists will tend to agree with everything you say when you first meet them.

Even if they generally disagree with you,

They will not risk that narcissistic supply by disagreeing with you.

A healthy person has their own opinion and their own idea and they don't feel like they have to agree with you.

They're not afraid to disagree with you.

A really healthy person understands that everybody has a right to their own opinion and is not threatened by the opinions of others.

But a narcissist,

When they meet you,

Will shake their head and agree with everything that you say just because what they're trying to do is get you on the hook to pull you in so they can eventually abuse you.

20,

Narcissistic friends talk about you behind your back,

Deliberately leave you out of conversations and will also purposely not invite you to places as a way to exercise or exert control over the friendship.

21,

Narcissistic friends never ask you how you are and instead see your relationship as an opportunity to fulfill some ego-centered need.

For instance,

You have a car and she doesn't want to take the cab to the bar.

22,

Narcissistic siblings treat you as if you have no worth.

They ignore you.

They shut you down and refuse to give you an ounce of respect.

23,

Narcissistic siblings as well as friends will try to steal your other friends,

Your clothes and even your lovers.

24,

Narcissistic siblings harbor intense feelings of envy,

Anger and rage for their victims and oftentimes these feelings are mirrors of how the victim was treated by the parents in the home.

A narcissistic sibling is simply treating the scapegoat of the family the way the parents of the home did.

25,

Narcissistic friends see others as a means to an end.

If you have something to offer a narcissistic friend,

She's there.

If not,

She isn't going to call you to make sure you're okay after not speaking to you for a while.

26,

Narcissistic friends have a way to make every conversation about them.

27,

Narcissistic friends tune you out,

Mock you in front of others and discard you when you do not agree with something they've said.

Number 28,

Narcissistic friends need to feel like they have control over the personalities in the group of your friends.

29,

Narcissistic friends slowly infect the inner circle of your friendships until over time they have infused the group with a sense of fear around going up against the narcissist.

Number 30,

A narcissistic friend has one purpose and that is to get you to give them all of your time,

Attention and sometimes even your money.

31,

Narcissistic parents are unable to become attuned to their children emotionally.

Number 32,

Narcissistic parents are oftentimes phonies and can act kind in front of strangers and then cruel to the children when there's no one around.

Number 33,

Narc parents are oftentimes verbally,

Psychologically and physically abusive.

Number 34,

Narcissistic mothers can be jealous and envious of their daughters.

Number 35,

Narcissistic fathers can be avoidant,

Dismissive,

Argumentative as well as sexually suggestive.

Number 36,

Narcissistic parents are indifferent to what their children are experiencing.

Number 37,

Narcissistic parents see their children as objects and not as the angels they are.

Number 38,

Narcissistic parents can see their children as extension of themselves almost like property or they can treat their children like they have no attachment or bond to them at all.

Number 39,

Narcissistic parents do not hear,

Listen or authentically care about their children's emotions.

Number 40,

Narcissistic parents tend to treat their children as if they owe them something.

Children are oftentimes abused and then told,

Look at what I do for you.

A big aspect of narcissistic parent relationships to their children has to do with the parents infusing the children with the sense that the child has no power in the relationship.

And this type of abuse pattern can be covert as well as overt.

A narcissistic parent can abuse a child by commission or omission.

Number 41,

Narcissistic parents use guilt and shame as weapons against their children.

Number 42,

Narcissistic lovers discard their victims when the victims are no longer willing to be an endless ego supply.

Number 43,

Narcissists can discard you once the relationship is over or seek to completely annihilate you.

Number 44,

Narcissistic spouses will lie about you in court,

Steal your money,

Your home and your children and fail to have any empathy for your experiences.

45,

Narcissistic lovers lie,

Cheat,

Steal and will do just about anything to feel like they are in control over the breakup.

46,

Narcissists will lie about you,

Make up stories and do just about anything to try and prove you are the crazy one.

Sadly,

They will never once consider how these lies are impacting your life.

Number 47,

Narcissistic people and narcissistic people with personality traits of narcissists will create fake Facebooks,

Twitters and Instagram profiles just to keep tabs on you so that they can feel like they have control over the situation between you.

Number 48,

Narcissistic lovers will throw you away the moment you present with a need,

A wish or a desire or concern you would like them to give consideration to.

Number 49,

Narcissistic lovers tend to be flirtatious,

Suggestive and crave attention from the opposite sex and will accuse you of being insecure when you call them out on it.

50,

Narcissists believe they deserve preferential treatment because for some reason they have come to believe it's true,

They are better,

Smarter,

Stronger and or superior to others.

Years ago I had a narcissistic friend and it wasn't easy for me to see,

In fact I didn't see it.

She was absolutely drop dead gorgeous,

She had a lot of attention given her way from other men and I did notice that she had an inability to connect to other people but for some reason she felt very connected to me.

Now that I know what I know about codependency and narcissism,

I realize now my codependency fed into her narcissism.

I was so used to not having people ask me about my day.

I was so used to people not asking me how I felt.

I was so used to not having anyone care about me as a person.

Unfortunately it was very natural for me to pay attention to a narcissist.

It was like a hand in a glove.

Narcissist had a need and the need was to get me to pay attention to her and I did.

It was an unfair and unbalanced relationship completely.

I didn't know I was dealing with narcissism or I was dealing with someone who had narcissistic traits.

It was difficult for me to understand what was really wrong.

I didn't want to judge her because she wasn't bad to me but the reality was she had no empathy for me as a person.

The truth was she didn't see me.

The absolute truth is I offered her a chance to have her feelings mirrored back to her because all I did was stand there and listen to her talk.

If you observe friendships with other people,

When you go out to dinner or if you're in an office and you get to see people over time,

It's really interesting to sit back and observe family relationships as well as social relationships with people.

I now when I'm out and about with my kids and I go out to breakfast or lunch or whatever with my kids or my husband,

It's so interesting for me to look around the room and to observe other people's conversations.

When I notice that there's one person that's doing all the talking and everybody else in the conversation is just nodding their head,

I tend to feel or wonder if the family understands that there's one person monopolizing the entire conversation.

I often wonder about the dynamics behind those situations.

It could be very innocent.

It could be that that's the family member that has an issue that day and the family's getting together to talk about it,

Or it could be something more.

On the road to recovery,

What I've learned is that it's absolutely essential that you become self-observing if you're going to heal.

Narcissists are really unable to see their own personal flaws.

Instead a narcissist will focus on the flaws of other people.

It's almost impossible for a narcissist to see what they need to confront within themselves.

Their whole personality is designed to redirect or thwart off this idea that there's anything wrong with them that they need to confront.

Thank you so much for tuning in and watching this video about the 50 Shades of Narcissistic Personality Treat.

It's really important that we educate ourselves so that we can be self-observing and we can learn how to hold on to ourselves and we're able to identify personality traits in other people.

I had a private coaching session this morning and what I encouraged my client to do was to understand that it is up to him to attract people who can mirror back to him his worth.

This is the way we help each other and help the planet.

As codependents we tend to constantly flow our love towards other people.

That's a beautiful thing,

But when we attract people who can only take from us,

That's when we are actually diminishing our own ability to love and to be loved.

We actually diminish our own personal light.

Our job as codependents is to learn to heal this childhood programming that has us caught up in attracting narcissistic people who can't see us.

It's not easy to recover from codependency,

Especially when you've been attracting narcissistic personalities your entire life.

Very oftentimes you wonder,

What's wrong with me?

Why do I keep attracting the same personality over and over and over and over?

The reality is,

It's not you,

It's your programming.

If you're attracting narcissistic people,

It's because you have been tuned up to attract narcissistic people.

There's something in your background,

There's something in your family of origin that has taught you that this type of abuse is the norm.

I believe most of us suffer from attachment traumas where we have been taught that we need to seek other people's validation because we never received the maternal validation that we needed so badly when we were children.

Here we are as adults and we're playing out that drama over and over.

It's like act one,

Over and over and over and over.

We are continually seeking that external validation we never received when we were children.

You have to learn to observe your programs.

You have to learn to observe yourself.

You have to learn to observe other people objectively so that you can understand how you're showing up in relationships to other people and how other people are showing up in relationship to you.

You are worthy,

You are enough.

When you learn to believe that,

That you start attracting people who are on that vibration.

When we enter into relationships full of fear,

We attract other people who will eventually make us feel afraid.

They will abandon us,

They will mock us,

They will belittle us,

And we will fear losing their attachment.

I'm all about helping you,

The recovering codependent,

The recovering abused adult child,

Heal from childhood programming so that you can connect to the power within,

So that you can understand just how amazingly powerful you are.

You can go out there and you can create and manifest beautiful life experiences.

When you do that,

You not only heal yourself,

But you help heal the people around you.

You give your children new information and new data,

A new program,

A new template to seek after.

When you do that,

You help heal the world.

And I'm so grateful.

I'm so grateful that that's a possibility here on our planet.

Reviews

Great to know

Thank you.

Great review of npd. Thanks for sharing your insights with me
Namaste 🙏