This meditation is best suited for those with some background knowledge of internal family systems.
If you'd like more information about IFS,
I invite you to listen to my talk,
IFS,
Understanding a Protector Part,
Talk and Meditation.
Depression as a protector part often arises to moderate the high-level emotions and intensity of other parts.
This could be in response to a part who has a lot of anxiety,
Or it could arise to shield parts who feel overwhelmed or distraught,
Or perhaps to dampen or hide parts who it fears may not be readily accepted by others.
When those parts are trying to be known and depression is working hard to keep them down,
There are often feelings of frustration,
Anger or aversion which create internal conflicts,
Which can then become a loop of parts fighting each other.
When this kind of internal discourse and conflict is ongoing,
Which is often the case,
There's an understandable draining of energy within us.
These are just a few examples of how a depressed protector part can work,
And they're my examples.
Your parts will tell you what their concerns are.
The most important piece of this work is having the openness to explore and to learn what it is your depressed part fears and needs.
When we have a curiosity about the positive intentions of what our depression are,
Then we can get to know this part and welcome it with a compassionate energy of self,
And over time,
We can help it to relax.
As with all IFS work,
This does not mean getting rid of the depressed part.
This part has been a loyal companion,
Serving you well for many years,
And we want to honor that dedication.
It means learning to recognize when your depressed part is calling out for attention and to respond lovingly to its innermost needs.
If you're feeling curious about a depressed part,
This meditation will help you get to know it better.
Before we start,
So that I'm not talking so much during the meditation and interrupting your internal dialogue,
I invite you to periodically notice how you feel toward the part who is emerging to be known.
If at any point you feel anything other than curious,
Calm,
And compassionate,
Just be aware that this is another part coming through.
If you find yourself in a part-to-part conversation,
That's perfectly normal and quite okay.
You can do two things if that happens.
The first is to ask the other part if it would be willing to step aside and let you get to know the depressed part.
And if it won't step aside,
Then you can simply use the rest of the meditation to get to know whichever part is arising.
If it does give you space to talk,
Be sure to thank it and to let it know that you'll come back to talk to it soon.
Now,
If you haven't already,
Begin to settle into a posture that's comfortable for you,
Becoming aware of your body gently breathing,
Following the breath for a few cycles,
The stream of cool air on the in-breath and warm on the out-breath,
Gently in,
Gently out.
Now bringing your attention to the feet and the legs,
Noticing the support of the surface beneath you.
And noticing the softness of your torso,
The way your belly and ribs expand and fall with the breath,
Checking in with the shoulders and neck,
Inviting any tension that's present to soften,
Feeling down the arms from the shoulders to the fingertips,
Relaxing the palms of the hands and the fingers,
Softening the face,
Paying special attention to the brow and the tiny muscles around the eyes,
Relaxing the jaw.
Now bring to mind any feelings of depression you have been experiencing,
Maybe recalling a time when it has been particularly present for you,
Noticing where you feel it in or around your body,
Noticing where you feel it in or around your body,
And then fine-tune your attention there.
See if you can name the sensation and be aware of its nuances.
Does it have a temperature?
A weight?
Is it still or does it have an energy to it?
What else do you notice?
This may feel intense,
And if so,
It may be helpful to breathe deeply and gently and to remind yourself that everything that arises is welcome.
It may be helpful to open your hands and to allow your palms to face upward to invite a feeling of openness,
Softening any resistance and allowing yourself to fully feel the sensation.
When that feels complete,
Ask this part how old it is.
Ask this part how old it is.
And then,
Not thinking of an answer,
Just allowing whatever arises to come through,
Asking this part,
Is there anything you would like me to know or anything you want to show me?
And then asking,
Asking,
How are you protecting me?
And then inquiring,
What are you afraid would happen if you didn't work so hard?
Remember to check in and to take notice of how you feel towards this part.
And if you notice anything other than self-energy,
Take a moment to adjust your inner conversation in whatever way you need.
And when you're ready,
Asking this part,
How has what you've shown or told me related to what's happening in my life right now?
And then offering the question,
Is there anything else you would like me to know?
After having heard your part's concerns and positive intentions,
Notice how you feel towards this part.
How has your understanding or appreciation of it changed?
What validation or understanding can you offer to this part from self-energy?
Notice how your part responds to the self-energy.
You may find that it is easily reassured,
Or you may find that it needs a little more time to trust this process.
Either way is perfect.
And then with an awareness of how your part is responding to self-energy,
Ask it,
What do you need from me right now or in the future?
Take a moment now to consider how you can honor this need and convey that to your part.
And if you can,
Ask it,
Take a moment now to consider how you can honor this need and convey that to your part.
It's an important step in the trust-building process to be true to your word,
So be intentional and honest when responding.
As always,
Thank your part for sharing with you today,
And let them know that you'll be back to talk to them again soon.
And if you had other parts who stepped aside to let you converse,
Extend gratitude to them for their cooperation too.
I'd like to leave you with something that I found helpful on my journey of self-discovery and growth.
When I notice feelings of anxiety,
Depression,
Anger,
Or any other emotion that feels unpleasant,
Viewing that as an indicator of the trust I am building with my parts,
Knowing that these parts feel welcomed enough to show themselves to me,
And then using their appearance as an opportunity to deepen my relationship with them,
Has transformed the perception of my journey from one of difficulty and strife to one that is filled with infinite opportunity.
This shift does not happen overnight.
And it doesn't always last for long.
Much of the work is returning again and again,
Gently,
To patience and presence.
Depression can feel oppressive,
Especially when it's long-standing.
And seeing this work as building a secure and loving relationship helps me to move from a place of constriction and frustration to one of endless expansion.
And that,
When I really let it sink in,
Fills me with fascination and awe at the incredible landscape of our being.
Sending much love to you and to all of your parts.
May the wholeness of the love you have within carry you faithfully along your journey.
