SRS Session 13 | Contraction & Expansion

In session 13 we see that contraction feels tight and limiting, but can expand into the gifts of freedom and possibility if only we can love ourselves enough to go through it with trust and curiosity. This meditation includes a guided visualization. The Spiritual Recalibration Series is designed to help you expand your awareness into a new, more open, curious and expansive way of being in daily life. This impactful series comprises 33 sessions, each with a short topic (the recalibration) followed by guided meditation. Meditations include affirmations, visualizations, and brief periods of quiet, musical stillness.

Transcript

Okay, Welcome back to the Spiritual Recalibration Series. Thank you for embarking on this series and opening yourself to a new way of being. My name is David, And this is Session 13, Contraction and Expansion. Find a comfortable seat in a space where you can allow yourself 20 minutes or so, Undistracted, To focus just on you. A quick reminder, To get the most out of this series, Please be sure you've listened to the Welcome Session, Session Zero. Here we go. So the first thing is just a reminder. We did this a few little while ago, I guess, And certainly when we first began talking about meditation, There's always three stages, Relaxation, Concentration and expansion. So the relaxation part is where we work with our body. We do some breath work, We do some centering, Some presence work to just start to relax the body and the mind. That's really helpful to prepare the mind for the concentration part, Which is where we use a technique. So that can be a focus on the breath, On the breath with a mantra, Many different meditation techniques for the concentration part. And then the expansion, I think I've mentioned this to you before, I was meditating for several years before I even learned that I was actually supposed to enjoy it, That I was supposed to enjoy, Especially that time at the end where you work to relax and you work to concentrate. And then it was like, I cooked the whole meal, But I never ate it. The expansion part is where you spend some time actually being there, Enjoying that to whatever extent you've cultivated some peace and some calm and some space in that time. So that's the expansion part. And thinking about that a little different way, Just kind of in regular life, Earlier this week, I was, What, And this was way back, Way back when, When I first began, I came to meditation personally, Because I really needed it, Needed it at the time. So some people come to it from a place of curiosity, But most of us come to these sorts of practices from a place of, You kind of need something, It's just kind of human nature. So at that time, The idea of contraction and expansion was really helpful because it's kind of like, So we've spoken before about being kind of above and below the line, That conscious leadership group paradigm, Where when you're above the line, You're open and you're curious and you're committed to learning whatever there is to learn in a given moment, Regardless of the situation, Especially in the challenging situations and times and circumstances. And below the line is when we're closed and defensive and committed to being right. And as human beings, We tend to spend most of our time below the line. And that's okay. The idea is to notice, Is to notice that. So an aspect of being kind of closed and defensive and wishing things were different than they are, You can kind of think of that like contraction, Where things feel small and closed. And for myself personally, When I'm in that space, My mind gets really busy. So I can notice lots and lots and lots of busyness. Things feel fast that way. You're kind of churning things over is an aspect that I've noticed in contraction. And we can almost, For so many over this past year, With 2020 and the coronavirus and such, Can almost think of it as a long extended contraction, Because there is so much fear and so much uncertainty and worry and just sadness about not seeing people and what was going on with your family and illness. And it was, You know, An interesting time. And here we are, You know, Things are still kind of sort of that way. But within that, So within that time, There are these little contractions and expansions all within that time. So the idea of, You can kind of think of it like bodybuilding, Or when you're working out your muscles, You actually have to, So if you're lifting a weight, You actually, When you do that, You're actually tearing muscle fibers. You're actually breaking them down so that they can grow. The idea of a contraction. But the growth is the expansion. So the question becomes, Whenever you notice yourself in a contracted state, To one, Trust that expansion is coming, Is on the other side of that. And that's where I kind of, When I was saying that was helpful, Because whenever I could notice, Wow, This just feels really, Really tight, Just noticing it as a contraction can help us welcome that, Oh, This is a contraction. I wonder how this is for me. I wonder how this is going to be helpful. I wonder what the expansion from here is going to feel like, And can I welcome that expansion? You never know how it's going to come, And this is the last bit I'll say about it. So early this week, I noticed I was in one, And it lasted, It felt like a day or so. And then yesterday, I went for a walk with a friend, And it was during that walk, I noticed this opening. He was sharing something with me, And I don't know, Something shifted. Things felt more open. And I guess there's a trick there not to look for the expansion. Can you embrace the contraction for what it is? It's challenging to do that, Because we just want to feel happy all the time and feel open and ready and curious. That's we want to be there, But the reality is that we're not. So can we love and accept ourselves? Can you love and accept yourself and embrace yourself when you're not? That's probably the biggest work, And where there's the most reward. Yeah. Okay, So maybe let's practice with this a little bit for just a few minutes now to wrap up with a little bit of meditation practice here. So get yourself, Recheck your posture, Get yourself comfortable again. And when you're sitting now, There's nothing magical about sitting on the floor. If you're sitting on the floor, That's wonderful. Just make sure you don't have to do this now, But maybe think about it for the next time you sit, Or if it's easy for you to do now, Definitely do so. But you want ideally to have your hips higher than your knees. So if you're sitting, Even the most practiced yogi who's sitting in Lotus posture with the legs crossed needs a little something underneath the tush, Because if the knees are higher than the hips, Then your back is going to scrunch, And you're going to curl, And you're going to have to work really hard to stay upright. And then all that's going to happen while you're sitting there is you're supposed to be, Like, Relaxing and meditation and be thinking about how uncomfortable your body is. So when I sit on the floor, I sit on a cushion, A pretty big cushion, Frankly, Especially for, You know, Stereo type of guys. A lot of us, Sometimes it's going to feel like you're sitting on a throne, So you have to be up so high to get your knees at least level, If not a little bit lower than your hips. And you'll notice that when you do that, It'll tilt your pelvis forward. It'll rotate it a little bit so that it's kind of like your tush sticks out a little bit. So you get a little bit of that rounding in the lower back, And that allows you to sit up straight more naturally and more comfortably. If you're sitting in a chair, Same thing. Oftentimes little chairs are low to the ground, Such that you sit on a folded up blanket or a cushion to get your hips a little higher than your knees. So sit nice and upright. If you're sitting in a chair, Put your feet flat on the ground. Draw your shoulder blades together gently. Nothing tense up there, Just a nice upright posture. It's really important with meditation that we sit with an upright posture so we can draw that energy up from the base of the spine, Through the spine, Up into our brain, Up to that point between the eyebrows. Close down the eyelids gently. Tuck your chin just slightly so your neck is nice and straight. Notice if your chin is kind of jetting forward or tucking back, You kind of like to have your head centered over your neck, Between your shoulders. So now you may be wondering, What do I do now? I'm just sitting here. Isn't that amazing that you've, As a human being, Given yourself permission to just sit? It is by far the hardest thing for a human being to do, And here you are doing it. Begin to notice your breath. See if you can draw your attention to your nostrils. Sometimes that's the easiest place to notice the physical sensation of the breath. Maybe the edges of your nostrils. You may be able to feel the air passing. If you'd like a little orientation, Take your right hand and stick out your index finger and place it below your nose like a little mustache, Like a little pretend mustache. And you'll notice when you inhale, The air feels cool on your finger. And when you exhale, You can feel the warmth. It's a little trick. And then remove your finger and see if you can keep noticing that breath. Cool on the inhale and warm on the exhale. And now you'll notice it takes almost no time at all for the mind to begin wandering. Wandering off to thoughts, How much longer is he going to make us do this, Or something that's coming up next, A task, Something that was happening before. Any time you notice the mind wandering, Celebrate that you noticed, And then gently but firmly come back to noticing your breath. Over and over again, It is the nature of the mind, But there's a sort of training that can happen as you devote yourself to this practice, Training your mind so that you can be more present in life, Here certainly in meditation. But the idea here is that life gets better. Life becomes more enjoyable because we're here for it. The greatest way to know if your meditation practice is growing is to notice how you're smiling more, Are you noticing more things, Are your relationships better, Do you feel more satisfied, More fulfilled, More healthy? Just notice. Allow yourself to be just as you are. Allow your breath to be just as it is. Just another minute or two now before this meditation practice is over. Take an intentional inhale through your nose, And then exhale through your mouth. You don't have to watch the breath anymore. Draw your gaze gently upward behind your closed eyelids to the point between your eyebrows. No straining, Just gently upward, As if you're looking off at a distant horizon. If you want to play with it, Allow your gaze to come straight ahead, And then down, Back to straight ahead, And then gently upward. Those are the three positions of the eyes for the gaze. Gently upward, And tune back in. Visualize that inner body that we spoke of earlier, That part within you, That space within you that is expansive, That is kindness, That is peace, That is calmness, That is wisdom, That is love, The space that hears without labeling, That sees without judging, That space that can see the same space, The same space in everything and everyone, That space that is easy and simple and beautiful. Now let go of this visualization of the space, Again drawing your gaze gently upward. Just allow yourself to be here. Enjoy being here. Gratitude to yourself for allowing yourself to be here for just another few moments. Good. Now take a normal breath in and out. Prepare yourself to come back to the space where you are. And when you're ready, You can flutter open your eyelids, Or you're welcome to stay here for as long as you like.