Just collapsing in on yourself like a black hole,
Giving up,
Quitting on the day,
Letting go of the week.
Whatever is past is ancient history,
And whatever is to come is the distant future that is ungiven and unpredictable.
Just be here at this moment.
Enjoy the time you give yourself to meditate,
To chill out,
To relax,
To do nothing.
A lot of people can't afford that luxury,
And you have given it to yourself as a free will offering.
You've given yourself time.
Even if you don't fall asleep,
That's enough.
That's good.
Come down,
Get heavy,
Sink in,
Fall apart,
And let go.
There's nothing to control,
Nothing to steer,
No action items or to-do lists that can be solved right now.
You are okay just as you are,
And don't need to grasp at anything.
You don't need to do or be anything more than what you are doing and who you are right now.
You're enough.
Let your ears expand.
You might notice small sounds,
Human sounds,
Natural sounds,
Big sounds,
Little sounds,
High-pitched,
Low-pitched.
By now,
Probably your eyes have closed.
If not,
You might want to try that.
Letting yourself begin to drift,
Becoming paradoxically very heavy and also weightless.
We know that your mind will wander,
Because that's what minds do.
That's how brains stay awake and alive,
And that's good.
Maybe you want to let it wander in an unpredictable way,
The way that dreams go,
Haphazard and surprising,
Without a focus.
Maybe you just want to slow down.
You're breathing,
Taking in a deep breath,
Exhaling slowly,
In deeply,
Out slowly,
A few more times.
Maybe when you exhale,
You use the ancient biblical word selah,
A word of relief and release,
A breathing word.
Stretch,
Yawn,
Whatever you need,
Whatever comes to you.
When you get distracted,
As we always do,
Just come back to your bed,
Or my voice,
Or your breathing,
Or the mass of yourself.
Open up to a little forgiveness.
Forgiving anyone who injured you materially or spiritually,
Emotionally or physically,
Took something away from you,
Said something nasty,
Upset your equilibrium.
You can forgive,
Or you can hold on and be dragged behind.
That choice is yours,
But holding on probably won't help you to sleep,
So maybe you just put it aside if you're not ready to forgive.
Letting go,
So no one would be punished on your account.
Maybe you want to apologize for things you've done,
Or maybe you're not ready,
Or maybe you're just barely recognizing and barely ready to acknowledge what you've done.
Or maybe it was obvious and you tripped someone accidentally.
Maybe you're ready to apologize,
Maybe not.
Do what you need to do so that you can sleep,
And maybe in the morning the answer will come to you,
And you'll learn something.
Maybe it'll be clear through sleep.
You might feel your eyes getting heavy,
The light dimming,
Things getting wonky.
A little blurry.
Maybe they start to spin or rock a little like you're in a rowboat.
You just drift towards the sea of dreams,
Towards sweet dreams.
And your world goes dark as other parts of the world light up.
You drift.
Maybe as you drift,
You stop for a moment to take stock and acknowledge that all of this is one.
All of this comes from shared particles.
The Big Bang,
Evolution by natural selection,
All these processes produced all of us.
Everything.
That there is a unity and a uniqueness at the core of all of this universe.
We are all together.
Take a moment to dwell on that,
To feel it,
To feel connected.
Maybe all of that connection fills you with joy and moments of love,
Moments of awareness.
Day by day,
Moment by moment,
Night by night.
And you feel protected,
Sheltered and shielded,
Shadowed in great and powerful wings,
And guarded by great and good forces all around you.
Day and night,
Night and day.
Safeguarded,
Lifted,
Supported and sated.
Maybe yawn or stretch or wiggle or fidget or exhale with the word Zella,
That ancient word of breath,
Zella.
Ready to peacefully go to sleep so that you can wake up peacefully tomorrow.
Sheltered in peace,
Shielded and protected.
Rescued even.
So that you can safely go out of consciousness and definitely you will safely return.
When the time is right.
Just letting go.
Taking those deep inhales and slow exhales and just getting slower and more quiet.
And great and good forces surround you.
They worked with and supported those who preceded us,
Looking over them,
Guarding them,
Bringing them to successful resolution and resilience.
They look over you now.
And these same great and good forces will continue after us as well.
And surrounded by such power and strength and determination,
You can be blessed.
The universe blesses you and safeguards you.
Take that in,
Blessing and guarding.
The universe is looking towards you to offer you blessings and protection.
To offer you grace.
A generosity that you don't have to deserve.
It just wants to give you something.
Take it in,
Find out what.
And the universe looks upon you and offers you wholeness,
Equanimity and peace.
A sense of completion.
Even as you sleep,
The universe will look over you,
Guarding you wide awake.
You can let go.
And great and good forces support you,
Look over you,
Surround you.
All that wonder and questions and doubts that you struggle with.
You can put aside all of those questions.
All of those concerns.
Just lay it at your right side with a great and good force that can hold your questions.
Day by day,
You struggle,
You run,
You elbow.
You force your way into things physically,
Emotionally,
Professionally.
You put all that effort down at your left side with a great and good force.
Attending to vigor.
And a force holding a light out ahead of you.
To find your way through dreams.
And behind you,
A great and good force sending you healing.
Body and soul.
And all about us,
This incredible mystery in which we float.
You might want to stretch or fidget,
Shift or yawn.
Whisper any last thoughts and exhale with the word.
One more time.
Just breathing.
Just going slow and going quiet.
You don't have to sleep,
But you don't have to do anything else.
You're free.
You have no commitments.
And you just float through the universe,
Content and watched over and supported.
And the universe is whole and entire and strong and solid,
And you can just let go.
Let go.
Letting your body float in the hand of a loving universe.
Body and soul with nothing to fear.
