A Practice In Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not one of those things that we know how to do well. We never really got shown how to, by anyone. We get lost in the effort of letting go or thinking it is about forgiving others when really forgiveness is all about ourselves. I put this little practice together a while ago. It was more of a reminder when my anxiety got too much, that I need to check in and listen to my own advice... I'm the person that really knows me best.

Transcript

So this is a practice in forgiveness.

I just want you to get yourself nice and comfortable and relax.

Appreciate right now if you're doing this practice that relax is not a term that really offers any sort of assistance.

So I suppose getting yourself comfortable would probably be the most appropriate word and hopefully what we'll find over the course of this little practice is that you begin to relax a little bit more.

Forgiveness is one of those terms that we often associate with a requirement to either forgive others or for them to forgive you.

But in truth,

Forgiveness is all about ourselves.

It's not till we forgive ourselves for hurting,

Forgive ourselves for being worried or anxious,

Forgive ourselves for making mistakes,

For failing.

It really,

We let go.

We open up into that compassion that resides within us as well.

So as we're comfortable just letting our attention move into the body.

If you're deciding right now actually I think I'm going to lie down and lie down.

This next 10,

12 minutes is all about you.

Our life becomes so much simpler when we suffer just a little bit less.

And also I don't want to place any expectations on what you're going to receive from this practice.

I truly hope that it helps you in some way.

So as we bring our attention into our body,

Let's start with all the way down in our feet.

It's that wonderful,

Wonderful question you know.

How do you know that they're there?

How do you know you have feet?

What sensations are there?

And it's not about trying to find a particular sensation.

You're just noticing that you have sensations down there.

Maybe there's warmth and pressure.

Maybe if you've got socks or a boots on or flip flops,

Thongs.

You just feel the sense of clothing,

Anything in particular.

You're not trying to create a sensation.

You're just being with what sensations are here with you right now.

Which is such an important part of the forgiveness process.

Carrying through the overburdening weight of the past,

The future.

Just being with what is here right now.

And guiding up from our feet into our legs.

So anywhere between the ankles and our hips.

It doesn't matter which leg.

Maybe you can feel pressure again.

Maybe it's the clothes.

Maybe one leg feels different to the other.

Your job right now is just to notice comfortably.

Don't need to imagine anything.

Trying to visualize anything in particular.

Just noticing what is here with you right now.

What can you feel?

Everywhere between the ankles and the hips.

We're not trying to change anything.

There's no sensation that's more important than the other.

Just noticing,

Not even tending to them in any way.

Just awareness.

And then from the legs now,

Let's bring that attention up into our torso.

From anywhere from the hips all the way up to our shoulders.

Not worrying about whether we have a busy mind at the moment.

Or doing your best not to.

I know it's tough.

Not busy mind,

Not busy mind.

That's okay.

This next bit of time is just for you to sit and relax as best as you can do.

Be comfortable.

Just use our body as that anchor.

Any time we see or feel distracted.

We just bring our attention back to maybe the movement of our breath.

Sensations in our toes.

Just now we're just feeling the sensations in our torso.

Anywhere from our hips to our shoulders.

What can you feel?

Maybe there's weight.

Maybe there's warmth.

Maybe there's a sense of movement,

Aliveness.

The breath as it flows in and out.

Has our stomach moving.

Lungs moving.

Gentle shoulders moving.

Maybe it's that beat of the heart that you can feel the most.

Just noticing what's here with you right now.

What can you feel?

Just like you can feel the sensations,

You can also relax.

Maybe you won't relax straight away.

Maybe you already are relaxed.

Maybe you'll relax shortly.

Not giving yourself any guideline.

You know when's best to relax anyway.

Let's just bring some of that attention now just onto the movement and the flow of our breath.

Just feeling our lungs feel in our stomach,

Feel life force.

Breathe in and watch that movement.

We breathe out and relax as we breathe out.

Just watching that flow,

Watching that constant change.

This movement that we call breath,

Again just allows us to bring some of that attention back into our body.

Anytime we get distracted.

Again we're not trying to control or change our breath in any way.

Just watching the movement.

Watching the flow.

And giving as much space to the thoughts as they calm and go.

Learning over and over again as many times as we need to remember.

Now from here what I want you to do,

I just want you to sort of imagine yourself stood there.

If you're not too great at visualizing,

Just doing your best.

Just imagining something about you.

You bring sort of this visual of you stood in front of you.

So it's just you and you standing,

Looking each other in the eyes.

You just open your arms up and take an embrace from yourself.

And again if you're having difficulty visualizing,

Just trying to remember yourself in some way.

Just setting the intention in our mind that this is what you can see.

And you're just imagining you in front of you,

Embracing.

Then you hear yourself whisper,

I wish you love and happiness.

And as you continue saying to yourself,

I forgive you for being anxious.

I forgive you for putting me down about it.

I forgive you for the choices that you may have made.

And I forgive you for feeling sad about it.

Please be patient with me.

I know I will get better.

Everything will be okay.

We will never have no one.

We will always be together.

I forgive you for feeling guilty.

I forgive you for being impatient.

I forgive you for hurting.

I forgive you for being emotional.

It is okay to be upset.

I love you.

You are so very important.

You are truly amazing.

Incomparable.

And everything will be okay.

As you keep saying to yourself,

Keep hearing the words,

I can do it.

Anxiety is like breath.

It comes,

It stays,

And then it goes.

I can realize that just like my breath,

It changes every moment.

That every moment is an opportunity to see it through fresh eyes.

Is an opportunity for compassion.

I can realize that just like my breath flows out of me,

So will this anxious feeling.

I can realize that these anxious feelings are not permanent.

I remember my happy times.

And whilst I don't expect them,

I know these will come soon.

This anxiety.

This sensation.

It's not me.

It's not the true me.

I know me.

As I breathe in,

I breathe calm into my body.

And as I breathe out,

I smile.

As I breathe in,

I breathe calmness into my body.

As I breathe out,

I smile.

As I breathe in,

I breathe in calm.

As I breathe out,

I smile.

As I breathe in,

I breathe in calm.

As I breathe out,

I smile.

We just need to learn how to better harness this anxious energy.

Recognizing that we can't help when our heart is filled with doubt.

And this feeling,

This feeling is not you.

It's not the true you.

It comes and it goes.

And yet,

You remain.

As I breathe in,

I breathe in calm.

And as I breathe out,

I smile.

As I breathe in,

I breathe in calm.

And as I breathe out,

I smile.

Before I finish,

I just wanted to offer up one of my most favorite quotes by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.

The most beautiful people we have known are those that have known defeat,

Known suffering,

Known struggle,

Known loss and have found their way out of the depths.

These persons have an appreciation,

A sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion,

Gentleness and deep loving concern.

Beautiful people do not just happen.

I truly wish you an amazing rest of your day.

Reviews

This is beautiful. I’ll return to it often. 🙏🏻❤️

Thank you so much for this practice. I really really needed I hear those words and embrace the feelings in my body with a sense of tenderness. Truly moving 🥲

Thank you for this gentle practice that meets me where I am and helps me soften
💛💫

Gentle guidance. I love the quote at the end too 🙏🏾😊🌼

Another beautiful meditation by Dan. Forgiving yourself and holding a space for yourself is so important and Dan helps you to meet and hold yourself in this meditation. Thank you Dan!

I love this meditation. It brought comfort, tears, release and helped me to embrace and love myself more deeply. I am very grateful that as fate would have it, I got introduced to this teacher through one of his live workshops. Then, this morning as I looked at his different offerings my finger involuntarily tapped this meditation! I believe Grace led me to this and I’ll be listening to it again. Very powerful! I love the practice of noticing what sensations are present. I found Dan’s voice and the music that accompanied very soothing, encouraging and comforting. The affirmations that Dan has us whisper to ourselves felt empowering, uplifting and like words that I long needed to hear from myself.