12:19

Core Identity Exercise

by Charles Freligh

Rated
4.7
Type
guided
Activity
Meditation
Suitable for
Everyone
Plays
8.8k

In this practice, you will name four identities that are most central to who you are. I will then guide you through a process of imagining what it would be like to lose or let go of those identities, and then ultimately reintegrate each identity with gratitude, one by one. It may be helpful to use a sheet of paper at the beginning of this practice but you can also just engage with it in your mind. I hope you enjoy it!

IdentitySelf ReflectionLetting GoWritingGratitudeSelf AwarenessIdentity ExplorationLetting Go Of IdentityReintegrationBellsBell SoundsWriting Exercises

Transcript

Today's session will consist mostly of an exercise,

And it might be helpful for you if you have something to write on.

And so if that's accessible to you,

If you want to pause now,

Grab something to write on and to write with,

And then bring it back,

You can go ahead and do that.

But also if you don't,

That's okay too.

In this session,

I wanted to emphasize that some of the ways that we identify are really valuable for us and mean a lot to us.

And I wanted to provide an exercise on exploring some of these core identities of who we are.

In my work in therapy,

It's really important to pay attention to the different identities that are meaningful to the client I'm working with,

And also to be aware of my own identities and the ways that those intersect with the client,

The dynamics of power and privilege that might play out between me and the client,

Between the client and the society that they're a part of,

The larger system,

The ways the client might identify with a group in one way but then feel like a minority within that group,

Might not feel enough of a certain way to fully identify in that way.

So many different intersections that can be at play,

So many different constellations of identity.

And it's really important to take all of those into account in attempting to really understand this unique individual,

Their unique world that they inhabit.

And so for the remainder of this session,

I'm going to guide you through an exercise called Who Am I?

In order to explore and process some of the identities that you hold most meaningful.

And this is where if you have something to write on,

You can take that out.

If not,

That's okay to just follow along.

And I'm going to give you about two minutes here to reflect and identify the four identities that you hold most meaningful.

The four identities that most clearly answer the question,

Who am I?

And this could be anything.

It could be things like a basketball player or a brother or a son.

Those are some of the things for me.

Could have to do with sexuality or being an intellectual or whatever it is about you that you feel is most core to who you are.

So take that time now.

I'll give you two minutes to reflect and identify these four things that answer the question,

Who am I?

And if you have something to write on,

You can write them.

But if not,

You can just say them in your mind.

And I'll start and end those two minutes with the sound of a bell.

Mm.

You You You You Okay,

Now that you've identified these four core identities of who you are We're going to gradually sequentially See what it feels like to let go of each of these identities Just to imagine for this time together What it would feel like to let go of this identity of yours that you hold so meaningful and so you'll hear a bell and At each bell you'll let go of one more And so I want you to start with the one all of these are quartered All of these are quarter who you are but start with the one that feels the least core That might be hard to do but just see if you can make a choice now About which one to you feels the most peripheral To your identity and when you hear the bell Imagine what it's like to let go of that one And then when you hear the next bell Imagine what it's like to let go of the next one and so on You You and now you'll imagine what it's like to let go of the next of your identities You You and now imagining letting go of that second most core identity You And now bring to mind this most core part of who you are And with the bell you'll imagine what it would be like to let go of that You What does this space feel like You see what it's like to be in this space of nothing You All right,

And now what we're going to do is the same process but in the reverse direction So we're going to reintegrate one by one each of these core pieces of who we are And with the sound of the bell you can reintegrate that most central core identity of you Identity of you and you can fully embody it and feel gratitude for the role that it plays in your life Now you can reintegrate that second most core part of who you are and feel gratitude for it And now that third part of your identity You You You And now the fourth reintegrate and embody this identity as well And now just feel yourself as this whole complete human being this bundle of energy with all of these important parts of who you are and what you offer You The important part of this exercise to me is twofold.

It's to acknowledge and honor and be grateful for the different identities that make up who you uniquely are.

And then also to be aware that below the level of each of these identities,

You still exist in some way and maybe in some profound way.

And so to maybe include that in your sense of identity as well.

That identity that might not only connect you very deeply with every other human being,

But also with this basic experience of reality,

Connecting you with this miracle of experience.

And so I will leave you with that.

Have a great day.

Meet your Teacher

Charles FrelighMinneapolis, MN, USA

4.7 (927)

Recent Reviews

Cate

November 23, 2025

One of the heaviest experiences after years of meditation. Tears streaming as I let go one by one - emptiness on one level -. I thought “I only need one leaf.” Is this the charnel grounds, prison, a tent in the rubble of Gaza? Then gratitude & reminder not to squander my good fortune. An interesting adjunct to being in the 70’s of 111 zen days with Charles. In another sense this was a peek at aging - death of parents, losing abilities like sight, hearing, mobility. In 10 minutes being taken through 10,000 levels is mind blowing. Thank you.

Paul

March 23, 2025

Interesting exploration of an area of identification

Helen

April 3, 2024

I really love that, I love the way it made me isolate and focus on myself. I have trouble with that. My first identity is caretaker. Thank you for your thoughts provoking work. 💜

Jenny

October 1, 2023

Extremely insightful and profound exercise. Got a better sense of my core values with this fun method! Best 12 min spent!!

Guy

May 24, 2023

Insightful focus on identity as a means of connecting to others and the world

Anna

July 25, 2022

Wow, thank you for this meditation, I found it to be quite profound — very grateful to you.

Neety

June 10, 2022

This guided meditation always helps me center. One of my best bookmarks. Thank you! 🌺💜🌷🌹

Kelly

February 6, 2022

I was dubious half way through, but very happy I completed it :) Below all of my identities I am “boring, but peaceful.” I’d be fine if the rest of the world was the same way!

elena

January 31, 2022

Simple yet empowering, reminded me of who I am and gave me a renwed sense of confidence, thank you 🙏

Mel

December 10, 2021

Really interesting! I struggled with the limited instruction of how to “let go”… but I guess that’s part of the exercise! 🙂 awesome reflection thank you for sharing!

Jesse

December 3, 2021

Thought provoking. Identifying these core identities and gaining perspective. Thank 🙏🏼 you 🌸Jesse

Steffi

November 20, 2021

Amazing, thank you Charles! Fascinating how letting go is hard and relieving at the same time- then feeling the „void“ being lighter than expected , and finally welcoming the identities back with a new light and gratitude 🙏 . Please continue these wonderfully helpful exercises on IT - that way you support all of us who are geographically far away from you 😉.

Orly

November 17, 2021

17.11.21 Hello to you. *5*… Thank you very much. 🔵🌀🔵 Orly Israel

Linda

October 9, 2021

Very meaningful and creative way of getting in touch with your essence.

Debra

September 13, 2021

Well-that was more intense than I anticipated! Excellent exercise of realization…letting go…and welcoming. Thank you and namaste.

Helen

July 11, 2021

That was a fabulous way to be absolutely grateful for the major components in my life. Really loved that way to break it down 😍🙏

Kate

July 10, 2021

Interesting. I found the stripped away core a little unnerving.

Jodi

June 30, 2021

That was a great exercise that I’ll definitely revisit. I found when I set down one of my identities, I felt intense relief, so I’ll be digging more into that!

Suat

June 26, 2021

Very interesting. I said nice to meet you to myself.🌟💫 Thanks 😊

Rosemary

June 19, 2021

That was very illuminating. I felt the loss of each identity, like a small death. So when I brought each back, I truly appreciated its gift. Thank you… 🙏🌸🦋

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© 2025 Charles Freligh. All rights reserved. All copyright in this work remains with the original creator. No part of this material may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.

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