Loving Kindness for a Friend or Mentor Bring to mind somebody who it is easy for you to feel love and a good feeling about.
This may be a friend or perhaps a mentor,
Teacher or parent.
Try to find someone with whom the relationship is not conflicted,
A person you feel comfortable with and admire or appreciate.
Perhaps they've helped you in some way.
It may be tempting to choose a romantic partner.
You could experiment with this and also with someone where the love is more platonic.
Notice the difference in the quality of your mind in each case.
Do your thoughts become possessive?
Is their sense of love being limited in some way?
In general,
You want to stay with someone where we don't feel possessive and we don't feel conflicted,
Where it's very easy to have an open quality of friendship and loving care.
You might choose a pet.
Our pets love us with such openness they can be a wonderful model for what it means to love another being.
The devotion of a dog,
Cat or other pet can teach us a lot about love.
The relationship may be simpler,
Less complicated.
It's just about loving connection.
In cultivating loving kindness for a friend or mentor or pet,
It can be easier to see that love and happiness are infectious.
This is one of the benefits of cultivating loving kindness for the friend or mentor.
Just bringing them to mind,
We feel our own happiness increase.
So for this practice,
We'll begin simply with visualization.
And if you want to return to the phrases,
That can also work well.
Having chosen your target for loving kindness today,
Bringing them to mind and notice the quality of feeling that is evoked.
How does your body feel as you think of them?
What happens in your mind?
As we focus in on the friend or mentor,
Someone who's benefited us,
The benefactor,
They've been generous and kind with us,
They've helped us in some way,
They've supported us.
You might begin to realize that the mind is a love machine,
Generating greater and greater love for ourselves and others.
Allowing your sense of loving connection with this person to grow.
Just through your imagination,
You can begin to change your experience here and now.
Envisioning boundless love spreading between you and this person,
Spilling over.
They've offered you love,
You're offering them love,
This beautiful,
Open,
Loving connection.
What changes happen in your body and mind?
For example,
Is your body softening as happiness and contentment arise?
Let your mind rest in this state.
If you have difficulty connecting with this visualization,
You might prefer to return to the phrases we used in the previous example.
Bringing your mentor or friend or pet to mind,
Say to them silently,
Inwardly,
May you be safe.
May you be happy.
May you be peaceful.
You can choose any of the wishes from the previous section or make up your own.
May you be healthy.
May you be at ease.
Holding the image of your friend in mind.
If at any point it becomes challenging to think of your friend,
That's just fine.
You can just let their image fall away.
Return to sending loving kindness to yourself or go back to breath awareness.
Sustaining the loving connection with your friend for as long as it's easeful.
May you be safe.
May you be happy.
May you be peaceful.
Offering wishes for their well-being,
Simply through your imagination or if you prefer,
Through the phrases.
And then returning to breath awareness.
