Loving-Kindness For Difficult People

How do we learn to love those we hate or have conflicts with? This guided meditation provides instructions for this important subject. Turning our mind toward those we feel resistant to, or perhaps have been harmed by, is important to our own healing, and to creating a safer, more loving world.

Transcript

Loving kindness for difficult people. Now we will direct loving kindness towards someone who is difficult for us to love. This may be somebody in your life who you struggle with, That person who you love to hate. You may feel this person has harmed you in some way by being critical or perhaps even abusive to you. Or it could be a more distant figure, Someone who you don't know personally, Like a politician or a cultural figure who represents brutality or cruelty. Sometimes we call this the enemy. Or maybe it's like your nemesis, That person who you professionally bump up against and you just somehow can't love them. You feel competitive or challenged around them. So whoever you choose, Recognize that there's this kind of instinct that's causing you to reject this person, To consider them unworthy of love. Whether that's on a small scale in your personal life or a bigger scale like across the country or even globally, A figure who's been associated with really serious harm. So recognize that our natural tendency is to consider this person unworthy of love. Let's see if we can investigate this line of thinking. From the view of interconnectedness, We might recognize that everyone, Really and truly everyone, Even those who have done terrible things, Have the same longing to feel safe, Protected, Happy, Healthy and peaceful. While we may not agree with their means of going around it, Of going about their way of getting their contentment, We can still recognize that underlevel principle of not only humanity but sentience, That we are all seeking these simple qualities of well-being, Safety, Happiness, Health, A peaceful mind and body. Once you've chosen your difficult person, Bring their image to mind and say to them, Your wishes for well-being, Choosing the wishes for this person, May you be safe, May you be happy, May you be peaceful. You don't have to agree with their actions or what they represent, You can still offer them loving-kindness. Notice if resistance arises in you and you know if it becomes too much, You're getting distracted and overwhelmed, You could just return to wishes for yourself or your friend, Someone who it's easy for you to love. In this practice we're learning to expand our heart. So we start with people who are easier and we gradually creep into more challenging situations, Allowing the mind to embrace the enemy, The difficult person that we really want to withhold our love from. This is not about accepting their actions but rather accepting their fundamental desire for safety, Happiness, Health and well-being. May you be safe, May you be happy, May you be peaceful, May you be at ease in body and mind. When we begin to embrace the difficult person, We can see and understand that wars can only happen because we allow hatred to arise. We allow hatred to arise. With a sincere intent to resolve our difficult emotions, We can have a vast impact across the planet, One person at a time. May you be safe, May you be happy, May you be peaceful, May you be at ease in body and mind.