The invitation right now is to spend some time getting to know a part of you that may present as an inner critic or inner shamer.
So as we prepare for this,
Begin by breathing,
Lengthening your breath,
Adjusting your body to get in a comfortable position,
And see if you can center yourself in an awareness of God's presence and love.
Focus on the knowledge that God knows and loves all parts of you,
And all parts of you have a purpose in your life,
Even parts that are burdened with a job of being critical.
The invitation today is to meet your inner critic or shamer in a safe room.
So to set this up,
Begin by asking any parts of you that are intimidated by or who believe the critic to step outside the room to allow you space to be alone with the critical part in the safe room in a few moments.
And before we focus on the critic,
Take a moment again to bring your awareness to God's presence that is always here with you,
Loving every part of you.
As you lean into your own courage and curiosity,
See if you can find an anchor in the strength of God's presence and love,
Knowing that even as you meet your critic,
You are not alone but strengthened by God's presence in and with you.
And from this space,
Invite the inner critic or shamer to join you in the safe room.
If parts of you have concerns about this,
Reassure them of who you are and remind them that the critic is simply a part of you and that you are here to be curious about it.
They can watch from the outside and if they begin to have concerns,
They are free to speak up and let you know.
And parts like critical parts can at times be overwhelming or intimidating,
So as you invite your critic to join you in this space,
Ask it not to overwhelm you.
If at any point in this meditation the part feels overwhelming or if this feels like too much,
You can stop the interaction with the critic.
All that is offered here is simply an invitation and not a requirement.
And now,
In the safety of the safe room,
Invite your critic to be here,
Simply inviting it to a conversation with you.
Continue to use your breath to anchor deep in a sense of inner confidence and courage as well as curiosity.
Remember that you are a beloved child of God.
As you invite your critic to join you,
Can you ask it to look at you.
Keep distance between you and the critic,
Enough distance so that you can see each other,
But so that you can feel your own separateness from the critic.
And then start by noticing the critic,
Simply observing it.
What does it look like?
How big is it?
What are its body language and behavioral patterns like?
Are there any gestures that it's making?
What is its tone of voice?
And as you notice it,
Does it seem bigger or smaller than you?
If it seems bigger,
I offer a reminder that this critic is a part of you,
And therefore smaller in size than you.
See if that awareness can allow you to alter your perspective,
Feeling your own size in a larger way as you are in the presence of the critic.
And as you continue to notice the critic,
Check inside to notice how you feel towards it.
If you notice any feelings other than openness and curiosity,
Such as intimidation,
Fear,
Anger,
Or detachment,
Ask the parts holding those feelings to wait outside the room with the other parts.
You may have a part that believes the critic.
Ask that part to wait outside the room also.
Maybe there is a part of you,
Or maybe many parts,
Who hold a sense of shame.
Can they wait outside too?
And if these parts are willing to wait,
You will probably notice a shift inside to more openness or curiosity.
If they are not willing,
Just stay here,
Being present to the parts unwilling to wait outside,
Hearing their concerns and fears,
And seeing what they need from you or God to address their needs.
Remind them that the critic is simply a part of you,
And that you are here and God is here.
If you do notice more openness or curiosity though,
Ask the critic if it would be willing to answer a few questions with you now.
If so,
Begin by asking the critic if it knows who you are,
And if it knows that it is a part of you.
How does it respond to this question?
Can you ask it what its job is in your life?
What is its intention for you?
What does it desire for you?
And what is it afraid would happen if it didn't talk to you the way that it does?
Can you ask it where it learned to talk to you this way?
Was its language and behavior learned from someone else,
Or did it learn it on its own?
Does it enjoy its job in the ways it talks to you?
And ask the critic what it sees when it looks at you.
If it reports seeing anything different than qualities that are congruent with qualities of your core self,
God's image in you,
And of being an adult,
The critic is probably seeing a part of you and not you,
Your core self,
When it looks at you.
Maybe the critic thinks you are younger than your age or less capable than you are.
Maybe the critic is confused and doesn't know who you really are.
Take a moment to update the critic,
Letting it know your actual age and reminding it that it is a part of you.
Remind it that God knows and loves you,
And show it some of your courage and confidence.
You can also remind the critic that God knows and loves it.
Is it able to take that truth in?
And how is the critic responding now?
And how are you feeling towards it now?
If the critic is expressing any sense of vulnerability,
Such as admitting how hard its job is,
See if it is open at all to the idea of letting you hold more responsibility for what it is trying to do in your life.
It is possible that this critic can be less burdened with responsibility and painful energy and emotions.
How is it responding to that?
Maybe it would like a new role in your life.
And now you might ask the critic if it has interest in meeting God directly.
If so,
Invite the critic to turn towards the presence of God.
How is God revealing himself in this moment?
How is the critic responding?
Can the critic sense God's love for it?
How is the critic responding to this?
Is the critic open at all to the idea of opening up more space to trust God's Spirit to help lead and shepherd the parts of you that the critic has concerns about?
There is no obligation here for anything to change.
But before we end,
Check inside with the critic to see if anything else is needed right now.
What would the critic like from you moving forward?
And what can you carry from this interaction into the days ahead?
And check with yourself again.
How do you feel towards the critic now?
Spend a moment more with the critic,
Thanking it for its time with you here today and letting it know that you see that it has had a difficult role.
If it is open to hearing this,
Reassure it of the hope that things can be different.
And then check with the parts outside of the room,
Those who are afraid of,
Intimidated by,
Angered at,
Or who believe the critic.
Check with the ones who hold shame.
They may need more time with you in the future,
But for now,
See how they are responding to witnessing this.
And then remind all parts of you,
Including the critic,
That you are fearfully and wonderfully made and every part of you is deeply loved.
And then,
Continuing to breathe slowly,
Gradually begin to shift your focus back to the external world.
