Hi everyone!
Today I would like to talk about the topic honoring our journey.
So the reason that I would like to speak about this today is because I feel like whenever we're born into this world,
It's Easy to lose ourselves in the expectations and I would say like expectations,
Responsibilities,
Different roles that are set upon us from family,
Culture,
Society.
Different structures in society that I feel like we're constantly being pushed to perform,
Whether that's a role in your household,
At your school,
Out in the community,
Wherever you're at.
We're always pushed to be productive,
To perform,
To be a certain way,
To rise up to certain expectations and I feel like it's easy to.
Not feel worthy or not feel good enough because we're constantly trying to meet this mark.
That's been placed upon us,
Whether it's the way we look or.
The way other people think we should be or feel or.
Um.
.
.
What we should accomplish in life,
What we should have by a certain age,
Or whatever it is,
And I feel like We get so wrapped up and so motivated to meet all these to meet all these expectations and requirements that are being pushed on us from outside of us.
That I feel like in my experience.
I've tried so hard to check all these boxes of.
.
.
Performing in this certain way and meeting the mark on all these requirements of what I should have,
How much money I should have,
What kind of career I should have,
How's everything to the point where I haven't let myself feel good enough or feel worthy enough until I could do this,
This,
This,
And this or until I could be this way.
Or until I could be emotionally stable,
Or.
.
.
Anything that I felt like I wasn't doing good enough at,
I wouldn't let myself feel worthy or feel good about anything until I could have this done and have this accomplished and be this sort of way.
Because other people put these expectations on me and their opinions on me where I was like,
Oh,
I need to make sure that I'm this way,
This way,
This way,
This way,
That I accomplish this,
This,
This,
And this,
And until I can do that,
Then I'll be worthy,
Then I'll be good enough.
Enough,
Then I will be.
Functional person in society,
Then I'll be worthy to be here.
And I feel like that's the.
Frame of mind that I've been living in for most of my life,
And I feel like,
Wow.
Now that I'm sitting here in this time and space and reflecting back on my life from the beginning of this journey up until now,
It's like,
There is a lot of things that we go through that are really difficult mentally,
Physically,
Spiritually,
Emotionally.
And.
Who cares if we don't get those accomplishments done or requirements done or whatever other people's ideas were of how we should be,
What we should have,
What we should care about.
How we should feel even,
Like.
None of that actually even matters.
That's not adding to my happiness.
To have this list of other people's ideas and expectations of me.
They're not my authority.
They're not my God.
They're not.
You know,
They don't rule dominion over me,
So why do I care so much about What other people like,
Want me to be or do I'm my own person.
I'm my own individual.
I'm my own sovereign being and I'm learning more about that now.
And I think it's easy to forget that because whenever we're born and we're growing up.
You know,
We're growing up around our elders,
Around everyone else around us that's older than us,
So of course.
Were conditioned into listening to what everybody else says,
Doing what everybody else says.
We have to look up to the other people around us to tell us what to do,
To listen to them,
To guide us.
That's just kind of how it is.
I mean,
When you're a child,
You have to look to the other people around you to support you in a sense.
Um.
.
.
So you just start believing what everybody else is telling you and start,
You know,
Following what they're telling you to do and to be.
And Yeah,
Sometimes it's easy to forget about who you truly are and what matters to you as your own individual.
It's very easy to forget that.
I feel like it gets pushed into the background while everyone else's expectations and obligations and responsibilities are just set in front of you.
And then you start working so hard towards those expectations and obligations and responsibilities from everyone else around you that then that becomes your life.
And then you're like,
Oh,
Well,
I'm still trying to make sure I do do all these things that they said and then.
Um.
.
.
Come to find out that once I start doing all those things,
It doesn't necessarily make me happy because that was someone else's idea of what they said was good for me.
And.
We each are our own individual and we each have our own ideas,
Interests,
Beliefs.
Thoughts,
Feelings,
Way of being,
Lifestyle,
For a reason.
It's gonna be different for each person,
So.
I can't expect another person,
Place,
Or situation outside of me.
To know what's best for me in my life.
And for me to know what's best for me in my life is to have different experiences and to see how I feel and to figure out what I do like and don't like,
To understand my emotions and feel accepted and loved for my emotions and for who I am no matter how I feel and the people that I'm around.
I want to feel Accepted for who I truly am in any moment and not tried to be told to be different or anything like that,
Because I accept myself for who I am.
And if I am experiencing different emotions that I need to feel,
That's for me to feel,
And I'm going to honor that.
So that's something that's always been important for me because I feel like it's easy for people to try to push our emotions to the side,
I guess depending on who you're around.
Having these emotions for a reason,
So it's like whatever I'm having those emotions for,
That's important to me.
So that's something important in my life is that I experience the emotions that I'm meant to feel.
And I'm in my own process of understanding that,
So I honor that.
Um.
.
.
Anyway,
So I just wanted to talk about honoring what it took to get here today because I feel like it's easy to not feel good enough and to not feel worthy because of all of these expectations that have been placed upon us.
And.
I feel like there's a lot that we go through in life and no one really talks about it or acknowledges that.
It's taken a long time for me just to have my feet on the ground.
Let alone check any of these boxes off for accomplishments or expectations or obligations.
And I feel like when I tried so hard to check all those boxes of other people's obligations,
Expectations,
Responsibilities.
I felt like I wasn't really getting my grounding.
I wasn't really building my own foundation.
I was just trying to do all these other things people wanted me to do.
And I wasn't building anything for myself,
Like truly that I wanted to build for myself and care for and nurture.
It just made me feel more lost in this world too.
Be doing all those things that weren't aligned with me.
It just made me feel more lost,
More ungrounded.
Farther away from my true self,
What I wanted,
What I cared about.
It was taking away my time and energy from exploring and discovering my true self,
My interest,
What I cared about.
I started chasing so fast after someone else's idea of what they said life should be,
What your dreams should be.
And That took me to a really confusing place in my life and I eventually hit rock bottom because of that.
And I'm grateful that I hit rock bottom because then it made me question everything and I'm grateful that I've been in different places in my life where I questioned everything because it's like.
What am I doing?
Who am I serving?
What is this purpose for?
Is this making me happy?
Is this what I wanted?
Am I doing this for someone else?
Am I doing this for me?
Am I doing this for someone else's approval of me?
And then am I going to feel happy when I think that they approve of me?
And then now I'll deem myself worthy and now I'll deem myself good enough because I was able to get these things done that somebody else wanted me to do.
And it's like,
Yeah,
That feels pretty miserable because I know that I am worthy and I honor who I am now because life has been really,
Really hard without getting any of those things done that people Wanted me to do or whatever it is like This life has been extremely difficult.
That's why I wanted to take this time to honor each of us.
For what it took to get here today,
Let alone accomplishing anything in our lives besides just existing.
And we're worthy because we exist.
We are good enough because we exist.
We are already good enough.
We don't have to have certain accomplishments or.
To be productive all of the time,
To be worthy.
And that's something that I'm going through a lot is because I feel like I've had this pattern of this overdrive productivity.
And I'm like,
Well,
If I try to be productive all the time,
I'm worthy if I'm productive.
But it's like,
No.
I'm worthy because I exist.
So that's what I wanted to share with everyone today is like.
You're worthy because you exist.
You matter.
You are good enough now.
You are good enough because you exist.
You don't have to meet any requirements of anything to be worthy,
To be good enough,
To be cared for,
To be loved.
And that's just something that I wanted to share today because I feel like it's really important to be able to honor all of who we are,
Honor our journey,
And not put so much emphasis on feeling worthy once this happens,
Or feeling good enough once this happens,
Or waiting for someone to accept us for who we are,
And waiting for someone to say,
Hey,
You did a good job,
To feel worthy.
These are just some different things that I've experienced on my journey where I feel like I was waiting for other people's approval to deem me worthy or to deem me good enough and I feel like I've been on that road for a long time of looking to people,
Places,
And situations to finally let me know if I'm good enough,
To finally let me know if I'm worthy or accept me.
And all along,
I needed to show myself that I'm worthy,
And that I am good enough,
And that I accept myself just because I'm here.
Just because I'm here and I'm still alive and.
I'm doing the best I can with that,
Let alone if anything happens in my life.
Whether I'm financially stable,
Whether I have accomplishments.
To be here is an accomplishment.
To be here means a whole hell of a lot,
So I'm not gonna discount that.
For myself or for anyone else,
Just for the fact that you're here.
If you're here,
You are good enough,
You are worthy,
You do matter,
No matter what.
So that's just something I wanted to share today because I feel like it's really important and I feel like it's not acknowledged very much to honor who we are and what it took to get here today,
Just to be here,
Just to exist,
Just to have our own life path that we're walking here.
And doing the best we can.
So thank you all so much for listening.
I'm sending everyone so much love and encouragement.
You're doing a really great job,
And I really appreciate you being here today.
I honor you,
And I thank you for being here.
