Hello and welcome.
I'm Mark Rowland,
And thank you so much for choosing to be here.
This meditation is for those moments when you have been a little bit hard on yourself.
Maybe something did not go quite as you wanted it to.
Maybe you said something you wish you had not said.
Or perhaps you are looking back over the day and finding a long list of things you think you should have handled better.
But before we begin.
.
.
I want to say this.
You do not need to solve your whole life in the next 10 minutes.
You do not need to prove that you are good enough.
Because for now.
.
.
We are simply making a little bit of room around the voice that has been judging you.
With that said.
Finder position.
That feel supportive to you.
You may be sitting.
Lying down or resting exactly as you are,
Let your hands settle somewhere easy.
And take a slow breath in through the nose and let it leave through the mouth.
Again,
Breathing in,
And breathing out.
Allowing the weight of the day to drop down through your body for this one moment.
Bring your attention to the points where your body is being held.
The chair beneath you or the bed beneath you.
Or the floor beneath your feet.
Or bat.
You do not have to hold yourself up alone right now.
Notice the movement of one natural breath there is nothing special you have to do with it.
Just feel the body breathing.
And now gently notice if there is something you have been blaming yourself for.
There is no need to go into the full story.
Just allow it to be there,
At a distance.
Maybe it is a mistake.
A choice or conversation.
Perhaps something you have felt is left undone.
Just see if you can name it silently.
In a few simple words.
Notice what happens in the body.
When you bring this to mind.
Perhaps you notice there is a slight tightness in the chest or maybe the throat stomach or face.
There may be a feeling of heaviness.
You do not have to try to get rid of it.
Simply acknowledge it.
This is what self-blame feels like in me,
Right now.
Often the inner critic believes it is helping.
It thinks that if we keep pushing,
Correcting,
Replaying and finding fault,
It can protect us from getting things wrong again.
But being punished by your own mind.
Really doesn't help you to grow.
Usually makes it even harder to see clearly.
So for this next breath Imagine that you are setting down a heavy bag you have been carrying.
Not throwing it away forever,
Just setting it beside you for a few minutes.
You can pick it up later again if you feel you still need to.
But you do not need to carry it while you rest.
Take another easy breath in… And as you breathe out,
Say silently,
I am allowed to pause.
Breathing in again.
And breathing out.
I am more than this moment.
There may be something you would like to learn from what happened.
And that's okay,
Because learning is very different from attacking yourself.
Know that you can take responsibility without becoming cruel to yourself.
You can recognize where you went wrong without deciding that you are wrong.
If it feels right,
Place a hand over your chest or somewhere that feels comforting.
Feel the warmth and pressure.
Of your own hand.
Allowing it to be a simple gesture.
Companionship.
You are here with yourself.
Now imagine speaking to someone you care about.
Someone who had made the same mistake or was carrying the same regrets?
Think of the tone you would use with them.
You might be honest with them,
You might help them see things clearly.
Yet you would probably not speak to them with the harshness you sometimes use with yourself.
See if you can offer yourself one sentence in that same tone.
Perhaps.
It makes sense that this feels hard.
Or,
I am doing the best I can with what I know today.
Very simply,
I am still worthy of kindness.
Let the words land where they can.
You do not have to fully believe them yet.
But just allow them to be a different time.
Possibility.
Notice the next breath arriving.
And notice it leaving.
The day may still be imperfect.
You may still have things to repair.
Decide or begin again tomorrow.
But this moment does not need to be spent fighting yourself.
As we come toward the end of this meditation,
Feel the support beneath you once more.
Feel your hands and your feet.
.
.
The room around you.
Taking a slightly deeper breath in,
And letting it go slowly.
Before you move on,
Choose one small act of kindness you can offer yourself today.
That may be resting without guilt.
Just drinking some water,
Or speaking to yourself more gently.
When the inner critical voice returns.
And let that be enough.
When you are ready begin to move your fingers and toes and if your eyes are closed allow them to open.
And take this with you.
You can learn from your life without turning against yourself.
Thank you for joining me.
Have a beautiful rest of your day.
Go in peace.
Namaste.
