7 Ways To Create A Conscious Morning Habit

In this presentation, I talk about the value of creating a morning habit and how it can set you up for the day.
The ideas are just suggestions; always listen to your wisdom first.

If you've enjoyed this talk, check out the course Create a Conscious Morning Habit on Insight Timer

With love MamaJ

Transcript

I love to think of these times that we have together as a cozy cup of tea in the living room with the fire and the candles and that we're all just sitting here chatting together and obviously I'm the one on the screen but you are free to put in the chat anything that you want.

If you need a little bit of help then I'm very happy to help you.

I'm a coach,

I'm a mentor and a guide so I'd be very happy to talk to whatever's going on for you.

I'm not the expert in your life,

You are,

But sometimes it helps to just say what's on your mind.

So just get comfortable and get a little more comfortable in your seat,

On your bed,

In your chair,

Wherever you are resting and allow your mind to settle either from the day so far or from the day ahead that you're about to have.

Let's take a few deep breaths and allow your breathing to fall into a natural rhythm that works for you.

Just become aware of your breath,

Just become aware of the sounds that are outside of the room that you're in beyond what you can normally hear.

Allow your thoughts to pass gently through your mind,

Thoughts are transient,

They have no weight,

We don't have to pay attention to them and allow yourselves to consciously connect with each other in this very sacred space that we create when we are together.

I'll read a little bit from The Missing Link by Sydney Banks.

It's the chapter called Living in the Now.

Through the centuries the wise have told us to live in the now.

The past is a ghost and cannot be held in the palm of your hand.

The future cannot be grasped,

No matter how desirable or enticing it may appear,

Nor can the present be held,

No matter how beautiful or exciting.

Begin the process of nourishing the soul by living in the now.

Forget the past and the future and just be.

You will surely be rewarded by living in the now.

When Eastern mystics describe the now they are not talking about today as a specific day of the month and year,

Their meaning goes deeper.

When such people refer to the now they mean the personal mind is free from the contaminants of yesterday's memories and fears.

This in turn frees the mind to see with clarity things as they are and not through the distorted memories and apprehensions.

Living in the now requires a clear mind and in clearing our minds we may have to give up something to receive something.

If you wanted to replace a glass of stale wine with fresh wine,

First you must pour out the old wine.

It's the same with clearing our minds of unwanted stale thoughts.

We must rid ourselves of yesterday's negative thoughts to receive today's positive and new feelings.

I do not ask anyone to ignore their past experiences,

This would be denial and denial is not a healthy state.

Instead seek a clearer understanding of the past and realize that negative feelings and emotions from past traumatic experiences are no longer true.

They are merely memories,

A collection of old stale thoughts.

Our thoughts are our guide and a good guide navigates through the maze of life following the pathway of love and understanding.

So when you're ready let those words settle into your soul.

Remember that during our time together there is nothing to do,

Nowhere to be,

No experience,

Expectations.

You can be exactly who you are true to yourself no matter where your state of mind is.

And when you're ready I'm going to bring you back to the room.

If it feels better for you to stay there for a few minutes then just remain there until you're comfortable.

For those who are ready sort of give yourself a little wriggle,

Move your head on your shoulders,

Wiggle your toes,

Wiggle your fingers and bring your eyes open and back to the room.

Now if you've been listening to me for a while you'll know that I teach three principles which is also known as innate health and that teaches us that nothing,

Nothing exists outside of us or if you like nothing outside of us can create our experience.

We create our experiences from the inside out.

So why create a habit?

Why talk about creating a conscious habit if everything is coming from within our own minds?

It came to me to do this because I realized that I've sort of done both.

I've been the person who literally thought is on my mind the minute that I wake up.

I couldn't go to sleep and then when I woke up my thoughts were immediately on me.

I would be having to get up straight away and get on with stuff.

I never gave myself any space and I had a situation where I learned that one of the reasons I was doing that was because I was afraid of being lazy and I was afraid that if I stopped I wouldn't start again.

So having experienced depression in my own life and also from my mother,

I realized that I was afraid that if I stopped I would never get up again but I didn't know that but that was running in the background if you like and so I was always running at 100 miles an hour,

Always having many many projects on the go,

Always doing something.

I thought it was a compliment when people said,

Oh you're always so busy,

You're always doing so much but I've come to see in the last couple of years that a rested mind is a way more powerful mind.

A rested mind knows what season your body in and your spirit is in.

It knows when it needs to slow down and when it can speed up it will.

A rested mind knows what you need.

A rested mind is more compassionate.

A rested mind takes care of other people as well as oneself.

So there's so much value in a rested mind but we don't value that in our culture.

I think that we value the hustle,

The game,

The getting things done,

The being busy and then we become fearful of not doing that,

Going against the grain and I don't rest anywhere near as much as I actually think my body needs but one thing that has helped me is to be more conscious about my habits and what I do with myself.

So in the course,

The first lesson is the first breath of awareness.

Can you imagine that that first breath of awareness,

That very first breath just on that hinterland of coming into consciousness,

Of conscious being conscious in the world,

That's such a powerful breath but it's so easy for us to overwrite that to just like wake up and then be thinking or be rushing around and it feels like in a way to honor that first breath is to honor the miracle of life.

So one of the things and I'm not great at habits and rituals,

Always changing things but I just brought together a few things that I found helpful and one of the things that I find really helpful is waking up in the morning and just noticing I'm alive.

Now,

Gratitude is great and we'll talk about gratitude in a sec but just noticing I'm alive,

I'm in this world and it's possible depending on your state of mind to then notice the trees or a pet or a partner or the fact that you've got a comfy bed or the sun or if you're a shift worker,

The night time,

It's possible to notice those other things too but just checking in with yourself first and noticing that conscious breath and allowing that breath to reawaken the miracle of life within you.

And all these things that I'm going to talk about,

They're not to-dos,

They're not shoulds,

You know I like to say don't should on yourself,

They're not shoulds,

They are invitations to try that you can then find your own path,

Find your own conscious morning ritual that would work for you.

So then I moved on to gratitude.

When I've done gratitude in the past and this is not the teacher's fault,

This is my fault for the way that I've taken it,

I've noticed that I try to be grateful.

So I'll often do gratitude in the evening when I'm trying to go to sleep and I think about my day and I think about all the things that I'm grateful for and the people that I'm grateful for during the day and myself that I'm grateful for but it's a bit forced,

It becomes a little bit like a thing instead of being gratitude the feeling,

You know that feeling that little like a waterfall that rises up inside you and just makes you tearful or emotional and you feel life,

That's real gratitude and you can't force that but what I found is that by pausing and slowing down and considering something that I'm grateful for,

I can get towards that feeling,

I can touch that feeling so it's closer to me as I go about my day.

All of these things are to be able to set the tone of the day.

Then I talk about setting gentle intentions.

Setting an intention isn't about forcing yourself to do something or trying to achieve a goal.

So you can set an intention like today I'll choose peace,

Today I'll choose love,

Let my every action be guided by love,

You know you can set an intention like that.

What's really important is not to then think you've failed,

It's important that if you set an intention you're not allowed to use that intention to beat yourself up.

So it's not about failing or succeeding,

It's about consciously setting the intention for the day and occasionally bringing yourself back to that intention because you know how it can be,

You can wake up with the intention I choose,

My every action will be guided by love and then your cat annoys you or something and then you shout at the cat and then you think that wasn't guided by love and you can feel bad about it.

But I see that setting an intention is just guiding yourself gently,

Really gently to say hey I know you're in there,

I know you want to live your best highest life,

Let my day be guided by that.

On day four in Create Conscious Morning Habit,

I talk about trust yourself.

This is a big one isn't it?

So often we don't trust ourselves,

We're so used to listening to what other people are saying,

To how to's and should's and comparing what we do and being visible,

Thinking we've got it wrong and thinking we're not good enough.

So trusting yourself is,

I find it is a little bit of a practice.

It's a little bit of a can I trust my decision today,

Can I just try it out?

Like don't take my word for it,

Go and try it out,

Go and see if when you're about to make a decision what's your gut reaction?

What do you think you want to do before you start getting into the content of the wise and ware force?

The more you practice trusting yourself,

The more you'll see yourself,

Your inner self,

Your inner guide,

Your true self is never wrong.

It never harms you or anybody else.

It is there for you all times.

I absolutely do mean trusting your intuition 100%.

Yes,

Trust your intuition and if you're like me,

I have argued with my intuition,

Like I get an intuition.

The new book that I was telling you about,

I originally,

I mean not originally,

For a long time I've wanted to write a crime novel,

Right?

Because I used to work in prison,

I've got loads of stories and so I thought it'd really cool to write a fiction crime novel and it's come and gone on and off.

Then just recently I really got into it and I thought,

Oh yeah definitely,

But I realised I need a little bit more knowledge before I can do it.

I need to understand a little bit more about character development and plot development and stuff like that,

So I wasn't quite ready.

Then this other book,

When I was coming back from my grandson's second birthday party,

Who also lives in Crawley,

A couple of weeks ago,

Last weekend in actual fact,

A book came fully formed into my mind.

Do you want to know the working title?

The working title is You're Already There.

You're Already There and there's going to be a number of volumes,

So there's going to be You're Already There,

Discovering the power within for entrepreneurship,

Discovering the power within for relationships,

Discovering the power within for spiritual growth.

But that idea came almost fully formed on the way on the drive home.

The drive home was three hours and I put on my little recorder and I just downloaded what was coming through my mind.

And then that's what I was working on last night.

I was like,

This is so alive within me,

I want to do this above everything else that I have to do.

And my husband said,

I thought you're going to write a crime book.

And I said,

Yeah,

Well,

And I gave him the practical reasons why I'm doing this rather than the crime book,

As in I need to know more about plot structures,

Etc.

Whereas I know how to write a nonfiction book,

Right?

But that's not the real reason.

The real reason is I trust myself and myself is currently guiding me on this path.

Now,

It may be that I get to a junction where nothing else is coming or it feels stopped.

And at that point,

I trust myself to stop.

I trust myself to take a pause.

Maybe there's some information that I don't know yet,

Or maybe something hasn't happened that needs to happen and there's so many things.

The self knows,

The true self knows,

Your intuition knows.

And I wanted to say something else just there because it just suddenly occurred to me,

And the intuition is right for that moment.

So I have a very beautiful mentor,

An older lady who's been doing this spiritual work for 50 years.

And she and her husband live on Salt Spring Island,

British Columbia,

And they wanted a new home.

They're getting on and they wanted a new home.

And they found the home of their dreams.

It had 95% everything that they wanted.

And so they were like,

Yeah,

This is it.

Intuitively,

This is absolutely right.

They went through all the buying,

Those things that you have to do to buy a home.

And a week later,

It fell through.

For some reason,

Either the offer was pulled or somebody else gave a higher offer and it fell through.

And Elsie said,

I don't understand.

She went into quite a funk about it because it felt so right and there was such momentum.

And it just felt like a completely the right decision and there was flow.

And then all of a sudden it wasn't happening.

And it sort of discombobulated her.

But she knows better.

So she just stayed with that discombobulation.

She didn't try to fight it.

She was just very confused and she just sat with it.

Her and her husband just sat with it.

And within a week,

The estate agent,

Or the realtors,

They call them,

Got in touch and said,

Oh my goodness,

This new place has come on the market.

And it's not 95%.

It is 100% what you were asking for.

This new place was that 5% better than the place that they thought was right.

So intuition works in the moment.

And it also,

The path is never clear to us.

The universe knows.

And so we have to trust intuition in the moment.

The reason why I'm sharing that with you is sometimes with people,

Our intuition can be that's not a right person to be in my life,

Or this event might not be right,

Or this job might not be right,

Or this food might not be right.

But that can change.

And when you trust your intuition,

You don't get too dogmatic about,

Oh no,

I don't like that,

Or them,

Or it.

You can just be checking in.

Yeah,

No,

This still feels right for me.

We can't possibly know everything all at once,

But everything is working all at once.

And I think it's confusing if we're trying to follow a path that our personal thinking has told us is right,

But that's not the case.

So when I worked in prison,

I imagined that,

Oh,

Now I'll be working in 200 prisons around the UK,

Or now I'll be doing this,

Now I'll be doing that.

And when that wasn't happening,

That was confusing.

But that's because I went as far as I could in that work.

And as far as I know right now,

That was all I was meant to do.

Now it may be that something else occurs in the future,

But by leaning into the unknown,

We're always surprised by the path and we can graciously follow it.

Because our intellectual mind,

Our ego makes up what the journey should look like and what the outcome should look like.

But in actual fact,

We don't know what's that going to look like.

Right.

And that actually ties into the next two lessons on this course.

One is called Only Thoughts Hold You Back,

And one is Baby Steps Pave the Way.

And then the final lesson brings it all together for you to create your own sacred morning habit and try things out.

That's a lovely question.

Thank you,

Beatriz.

Can you explain more about how to sit with the unknown?

So,

You know that saying,

Man makes plans and God laughs?

I think there's so much truth in that.

That is a known saying because there's a grain of truth in it.

And the grain of truth is that,

I know this is not what you're asking,

But I need to go there to be able to answer the question.

The grain of truth is that we have these powerful intellects,

Let's call it,

And the intellects and the reptile mind,

The amygdala,

Are constantly creating correlations and making sense out of the world.

And that makes us feel safe.

So,

That's why we're judgmental.

That's why we make things up,

Because if we think we know,

We feel better.

But in actual fact,

We don't know anything other than this moment,

Because there isn't anything other than this moment.

And I like to use COVID as an example.

So,

COVID happened to the world and most people's lives were affected by COVID,

One way or another.

People who had planned to do work for myself,

Like my business was growing,

I had got an implementation rollout across the southwest of England,

That stopped.

People had lost people,

People died.

Families couldn't see each other.

There were so many things that happened,

Including all the wonderful things that happened,

Like the rivers clearing up,

And the animals coming into the streets because humans weren't there,

And things growing,

And some amazing,

Amazing things happened as well.

But what it really showed me is that we literally never know what's going to happen next.

We just think that life is linear,

So we make up in our mind what we think is going to happen next.

So,

I think at the end of this session,

We'll all have a love in,

We'll say goodbye,

And then I'll go and probably have some dinner with my husband,

And then I'll probably watch something,

And then I'll probably go to bed,

And I'll get up in the morning,

And I'll do some recording for Insight Timer,

And so on,

Right?

So,

I know what I'm going to do,

But I only know what I know now.

So,

I'm open to,

I might not know what else is around the corner.

I don't know if I'm going to get a phone call to say I've won a million pounds and how will that change my life.

I don't know if I'm going to get a phone call with some sad news and how will that change my life.

I don't know if something's going to happen to people in my life.

And so,

To be able to rest in the unknown or sit with the unknown is first of all to accept that the unknown is a fact.

It is almost the only truth,

Because everything else is made up in the moment.

It just looks like that's how we think it's going to be.

So,

I think first of all is to sit with it,

To sit with it,

Is to accept that there is an unknown,

But also that the unknown is where the answers are.

The unknown is where the juicy spot is.

It feels scary because it feels like it's the dark,

But it's actually the light.

I feel humbled when I wake up to the unknown.

I don't feel thrown by it.

I mean,

I am thrown by it,

Right,

Where something happens and that sort of disrupts what I think was going to happen,

But I've become more aware to be humbled by it because it reminds me again,

I'm not in charge.

I'm not in control.

The only thing that you can do is show up to know.

That's the only thing that we can do.

We're not in charge of anything.

And it's,

Thank goodness.

I don't know what state the world would be if I was in charge of it,

But in a way,

It's thank goodness,

Right?

Because the universe,

She's got everything.

She knows we just have to live in the moment.

And so,

One of the reasons for creating a conscious morning habit or a conscious daily habit or evening habit,

But being conscious and being aware,

One of the reasons for that is just to bring you back to the present.

And being present is a portal to intuition.

It's always happening.

Our true self is always telling us,

Always guiding us,

Always looking after us,

But we're not always aware of it.

And being conscious and pausing and being present opens the portal to that.

And so,

You get to hear more,

You get to feel your intuition or hear it,

However it comes to you.

And that's what you can trust.

I can't trust my chatter mind.

I can't trust decisions that I make from ego or from fear or from even excitement.

I can't trust those.

Those are revved up versions of what I can trust.

But I can trust the knowing to pause.

I can trust the knowing to pause and I can trust that I know deep down what I need.

Can you always tell the difference between your mind or your ego and your intuition?

Great question,

Jennifer.

I think ultimately the answer is yes,

That you can tell the difference.

And this is my way.

This is my guide.

And you have to find your own.

But I think it's like this.

If there's a lot of thoughts,

Then I'm off the mark.

If it's clear and quiet and obvious,

Then I know there's something in it.

And that's even if it's something that I don't want.

So,

I remember one time I was creating the schedule for all the facilitators going into prison and I was trying to step back from the prison work and gain more business,

Like do more pitches and so on.

And so,

It was a new prison and I didn't include myself.

I wanted to give all the facilitators a chance to work together and I created this amazing schedule.

It took me a couple of hours and then I suddenly knew you have to do it.

And I didn't want to.

I did not want that insight.

I didn't want to.

I was like,

No,

I've got other things to do.

I can't do this.

But it was so obvious and so clear and there was no thinking on it.

There was no justification,

Rationalization,

Etc.

It was just,

You have to do it.

I didn't know even why,

But it was so clear.

I knew to do it.

And that's the difference.

It comes very clear and very obvious and no thinking.

So,

Whenever there's thinking,

Whenever I think,

Oh yeah,

This is amazing.

This is what I'm going to do.

But there's a load of revved up thinking,

Either justifying it or rationalizing it or even excitement sometimes is a red flag.

Then I know that's an idea that's come from me.

It's not necessarily a bad idea,

But it's an idea nonetheless.

Whereas intuition or gut feeling or the aha moment or the lightbulb moment,

They're almost obvious,

Aren't they?

When you get them,

They're almost like,

Oh yeah,

What didn't I think of that?

Yeah.

And one of the reasons why I love,

Love,

Love that question,

Jennifer,

Is because just by being aware that there's a difference and by looking for the difference increases your awareness of your intuition.

So,

The whole direction increases your portal,

Your access to intuition,

To the unknown.

It is incredible.

And you are incredible.

And I am very,

Very grateful that you're here.

Carmen,

I'm running out of time to finish my PhD.

I can't tell if it's my fear telling me to keep going and try and finish or it's my fear telling me to cut and run.

How do you create the quiet to hear your intuition?

That's such a great question.

Oh,

That's such a great question.

So,

Let me see if I can help.

Yeah,

I've been there.

It is amazing that you want to create the quiet.

So,

You know the answer.

You know that the answer is to create the quiet to hear your intuition.

How would it feel?

I'm going to say something a bit risky now,

Carmen.

How would it feel to not know the answer?

How would it feel to not know the answer and to allow yourself to be okay with not knowing?

Oh,

That's so honest and vulnerable,

Carmen.

Thank you.

Oh,

That really made me emotional.

So,

Liberating to feel okay with it.

So,

You know that you want to hear your intuition.

You want to feel okay with it.

I'm terrified of having spent a decade for nothing.

So,

I can't tell you what to do.

Only you know.

But what I can tell you is nothing is wasted.

Nothing.

If you can get quiet and consider,

You know,

Have some reflection time and consider that absolutely everything is on the table and everything is off the table.

Like anything,

Any answer is right.

And I'll give you a little story to demonstrate.

I was doing a retreat in Martha's Vineyard with two other people.

And the two other people were having some disagreements.

They were having some upset,

Which is not the best thing to have when you're doing a retreat.

And I was out with the one person and she was in real angst because on the one hand,

She did not feel like she could carry on.

And on the other hand,

She didn't feel that we could end the retreat.

People had come and paid money and,

You know,

We'd all got there and so on.

But I said to her,

Absolutely,

Any decision is possible.

We can pull this.

We can,

If it's the right thing to do,

It's the right thing to do.

We can pull this.

With that in mind,

Reflect,

If anything is possible,

If all answers are available,

What would you do?

Because when you trap yourself in the mindset of,

Well,

I love wasted,

I love wasted time,

You can't see whether you should carry on doing it or not,

Because that's all you can see.

You can only see the trap.

But nothing you do is a waste.

There's no such thing.

Because remember,

There's only this moment.

There's only the present moment.

So there isn't 10 years and there isn't 10 years in front.

It's only now.

And I think that everything we do is all ingredients for the next now.

It's all just lessons and learning.

And the purpose of being here is learning.

It isn't achieving.

It isn't the outcome.

There is only now.

And so each decision can just be about now.

It's just a made up idea of what that should lead to.

And that's no different from the made up idea that I worked for 10 years in prisons,

And therefore I should now be working in double the amount of prisons,

Or I'm in a beautiful,

Wonderful marriage and something could happen.

I have to stay in that marriage because I've been with that person for 10 years.

We know that those things aren't true,

Right?

But we get trapped in that.

I'm going to just do a quick closing circle so that we can take this moment with us.

Just gently close your eyes or lower your gaze if it feels good to do so.

And just once again,

Get really grounded wherever you are.

If you're leaning against some furniture in some way,

Feel your body weight against the furniture.

Allow your breath to fall into a steady rhythm.

If it feels good to do so,

Take a deep breath in and let it out.

Let your shoulders slump down.

Take another deep breath in and let it out.

Allow your head to move on your neck.

Allow yourself to reflect on the time that we spent together.

And if you have the capacity to do so,

Please acknowledge yourself for being here,

For being with,

And for being.

Your breath and your conscious arrival already lifts the consciousness of humanity.

The sacred time that we spend together is a gift to the world and to yourself.

If any words or thoughts come to mind that you'd like to share,

Now's the time to do so.

Otherwise,

You can open your eyes,

Bring yourself back to the room,

Notice your surroundings.