114.What We Must Learn: 4 Truths About Our Greatest Teachers

Some of the greatest teachers in our lives come to us disguised as friends, partners, children, or even taxi drivers whose stories touched us somehow in a matter of minutes. They are the people who help us discover ourselves in new ways. In this episode of Spiritually Hungry, join Monica and Michael as they share some of the most powerful influences in their lives and the lessons that have been deep and lasting.

Transcript

I think that often people think they need to search far and wide for enlightenment when often it's right in front of us in the places we would never look.

Welcome to the Spiritually Hungry podcast.

Welcome.

Just going to get right into it.

It's not a bad idea.

Our teachers come to us in many disguises and they will continue to come and go throughout our lives.

They may arrive as friends.

They're not always disguised.

I didn't say always.

I said many.

They arrive as friends or lovers.

They may be rabbis or wise elders or children,

Parents or tutors or even the taxi driver whose story touched us somehow in a matter of minutes.

In those instances,

It has the ability to make us rethink our choices,

Our day,

Perhaps even big picture decisions.

And when we come upon one of our rare great teachers in life,

We're never the same again.

Learning from them is like seeing in color for the first time or like having our first taste of sweetness.

These are the teachers who will help us discover ourselves in ways we never knew possible.

Their influence upon us is deep and lasting and they are among the greatest gift of our lives.

And I can speak for both of us that we've been very blessed to be able to have such teachers in this lifetime,

But also to connect to the teachings of great teachers who are no longer with us.

And that I don't take for granted because it's not a given and many people don't even have the desire or the ability to recognize the absolute strength and transformation that lives in those words.

Yeah,

And it's funny,

I wonder,

You know,

We take it,

I mean,

You take it for granted,

The importance of teachers and the importance of wisdom.

I'm sure there's many people out there who don't necessarily see the necessity,

Right?

Learning is for.

.

.

So we take it for granted?

No,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No.

We understand how important it is.

But we don't take it for granted.

No,

Let me finish.

Well,

Try to be clear.

We understand the importance in our lives of having teachers and continuing to study wisdom.

I think there are many people in the world who believe that,

You know,

You learn or study in school and then you go out into life and you sort of,

You know what you know,

And then if there's something specific you're interested in more,

You delve a little bit more deeply.

Like once you become the master of whatever your life is.

Or not even the master.

Well,

People think they're good enough.

We know a lot of people who aren't masters of anything.

Yeah,

But they think they have enough of whatever they need to get by.

And I think this is a very important point maybe to begin with.

That's why I started with it.

That this world,

This physical world is a world of great distraction.

And it's a world that really pulls us in.

And I think it's important to understand that,

That as most of us,

We've spoken with this many times,

We have two parts to ourselves.

There is what we call the soul,

The spirit,

The part that is not really of this world,

That is really part of a spiritual world.

And there's the body that is of this world.

That union of those two is very fraught because as it does for so many people,

Enveloped and engulfed in this world,

Our soul loses its way.

And I think if we don't understand the danger of being a lost soul and to be able to kill about that,

It doesn't mean like we're all good.

I'm assuming all the people listening to this body,

Good people.

But what we're talking about is really,

How many times have we had this moment,

Oh my God,

You just had a conversation with somebody a few minutes ago.

What am I doing with my life?

That's a lost soul.

Even though they're married,

They have kids,

They have a job,

Whatever the parts of their lives seem to be okay.

But what we're talking about is that every single one of us has a tremendous amount of wisdom,

Of actions,

Of manifestation that we're meant to do in this world.

But I know for myself that the fact that I've studied for 48 years of my life,

49 years of my life,

Doesn't do anything to me today.

And of course it's a strong foundation,

But I know that I desperately need new wisdom,

Inspiration,

Not just because I'll understand something more and new about myself,

About my life.

But maybe the most important part of studying true wisdom is that it extricates us out of the physicality and the envelopment of this world.

A thousand percent.

I think the only way a teacher can continue to be a powerful teacher is if they are continually being a student.

I don't think you,

You know,

It's never something you're supposed to outgrow.

You can.

But again,

I think what I want our listeners to really receive is the fact that if you're not,

I can say this about myself and I could say this to every single one of our listeners.

If you are not gaining new wisdom,

True wisdom every single day,

You're lost.

Now what does that mean?

It doesn't mean you're not a good person.

It doesn't mean you're not going to have a good day.

But the distance between the day you're meant to have with all the blessings and light and happiness is not going to happen.

Because again,

This world draws us in consciously,

Unconsciously,

And one of the most powerful ways to extract ourselves out of the confines and the dark,

The,

I don't want to say the darkness,

But it is darkness and it's a blindness that this world brings about is wisdom,

New wisdom,

Wisdom that inspires us anew every single day.

It also changes your mood.

It changes your perspective.

It changes your outlook on everything.

And you don't realize it until you develop a practice of continual study daily as a daily practice.

Like,

Wow,

Because it just simply,

Like you said,

Pulls you out of the physicality of this world and nothing is the same,

Looks the same,

And you're actually tapped into truth.

And there's a great parable used by an Italian capitalist,

One of my favorite,

Robert Moshe Chaim Luzzatto.

And he says,

Imagine that this world is one of those great,

We just went to a corn maze.

Imagine that this world is a very big maze and each one of us is trying to find our way in and out and through this maze.

And there are certain people who have been through the maze.

They know where to go.

They know where not to go.

They know where it ends.

They know how to make it through.

Would it be great to have them tutor us?

Well,

We have that opportunity.

Whether you have a physical teacher in this world,

Whether you have the thousands upon thousands of ancient books of wisdom,

Find wisdom that you can use and you can study every single day because I promise you that unless you're doing that on a daily basis,

You're not going to make it through this maze of life to the extent and filled with the great blessings and happiness that you're meant to have.

I concur.

So if you haven't caught on already,

This week we're dedicating this episode to our teachers and we've talked about our greatest teachers that we had the ability to learn from in daily,

I think,

Raising us,

Especially you,

Your parents,

Tharvin,

Karen.

So today we're going to and you can check that episode out.

I think it was 81 where we talked about how they teach us and what they taught,

How they taught us and the ways that they did.

But today we're also going to talk about additional teachers who have inspired us.

And I want to start at a place you probably wouldn't expect.

And I think that is.

.

.

How are they?

Everybody.

So there's an interesting thing in being able to,

I think,

Recognize a teacher and receive wisdom from them.

And the Kabbalah share that in order to receive wisdom from a teacher,

A holy wisdom or a truth,

There needs to be a great tolling and effort on the student's part.

And this tolling is usually in direct proportion to the student's desire.

So I think often people think,

Oh,

You know,

The wisdom will find me or if I'm interested in it,

You know,

I'm going to peruse it,

Learn a little bit about it.

But this is something else.

It's the desire to really learn the rules of life,

The purpose of life.

And that really only comes from ancient text.

And the Rav often taught this and I really love this about this true teaching,

I don't think it can happen without certain resistance.

And the Rav shared this in this quote.

He used the example of electricity to illustrate this idea.

One can pass energy through a light bulb,

But there will be no light without the resistance created in the bulb's coil.

The Rav and Karen met with such resistance when 40 years ago they brought the ancient wisdom of Kabbalah to the world.

But it's through this resistance that the light was able to shine into the corners of thousands,

If not millions of lives.

So sometimes,

And I think it's important for people to recognize this,

That resistance can come in an internal form where you just don't feel like studying or that you have too much pride,

You don't feel like you have anything to learn or it's through self-sabotage.

Other times resistance comes from the external form,

Whether we don't have enough time or money or opportunity or factors that seem out of our control.

And it stops us from really living that life of pursuit of learning,

Of curiosity,

Of improvement,

Of growth.

So I think that the three things we need to be a student is desire,

Is effort,

And a bit of resistance.

That's a great,

I want to write those down.

We should probably do it on episode.

.

.

Do this every time.

Desire.

Effort.

And resistance.

They're the key factors in being able to receive teachings from great teachers because sometimes will be about great wisdom or great teacher.

And again,

For some of the reasons I mentioned and maybe other ones,

We just don't even recognize it or in fact we run from it.

How many people run away from things that are so powerful and true?

Right.

I think it's such an important point.

I've shared this idea many times that sometimes when people think about a teacher,

Oh,

It's something that's going to make me feel good.

And that's true,

Hopefully.

And by the way,

To be clear,

When we say teacher,

It doesn't necessarily mean a teacher.

It could be your husband,

It could be your wife,

It could be a child,

It could be your friend,

It could be somebody you bump into in the street.

But one of the ways to actually know whether you're fulfilling your life's mission as a student is whether you're willing,

Desiring,

Able to hear the tough messages.

Because I know many people who enjoy things that I share or things that I teach,

But I know often that they would not be very happy if I actually pointed something out to them that wasn't as it should be or things that they need to change.

But if we look at life as its core,

Its main purpose to change and to grow,

And we also know that we are often blind to the true parts of us that need to change,

Then we should be not only open to,

But actually desiring to be getting tough messages as well.

And again,

I think this is something that most of us,

Even when we think about a teacher or learning or growing and changing,

It's in the way that I want.

But don't tell me anything that's too uncomfortable,

Don't tell me anything.

And what I find the most inspiring,

And I've come across a few people like this,

Not many,

People who are so true and pure in their desire that they really want to hear the tough stuff.

And they come back for more,

It's rare.

That brings us to how do you find your teacher?

And I think that often people think they need to search far and wide for enlightenment when often it's right in front of us in the places we would never look.

And we hear a lot of jokes about parents and if I had a better parent,

My life would be like this way.

I always say it's in bad taste to blame your parent after age 40,

But I think now that I've passed age 40,

I would put the number a lot younger and we have older kids now too.

So I just think it's in bad taste,

Generally speaking,

To blame.

Of course,

Because my point is,

Is that you can learn from your parents what to do,

But also what not to do.

You can learn things that should happen or shouldn't happen.

I mean,

Some of my greatest lessons from my parents were like,

Oh,

Yeah,

Note to self,

Never do that.

Or that other thing was great.

So I think that often we have an expectation of what a parent should be and therefore we assign them to only be that thing or they didn't measure up and so they can't really teach us anything else.

So I think it's our job to be aware of the template they're creating for us and then we can re-choose how we want to live our lives accordingly or not.

Yeah.

And I think this is your point,

Which is also not just about parents,

Right?

It's the understanding that there's a system in place that is perfect for our education and growth.

And education and growth,

To be really clear,

This is until the whole time we're in this physical world.

And again,

It can be parents,

It can be siblings,

All of it.

All of it is actually perfect.

And until and unless you're willing to grow and change in those ways,

You can be rejecting it or blaming it,

Like you said.

But if you go through life with the view that everybody in it,

Those who are there for a long time,

Those who are there for a short time,

I can literally point to significant and insignificant relationships that I had in my life.

Good.

The ones that went well and ones that didn't go well.

I learned so much from every single one.

Well,

That's because you were looking for that though.

Hopefully.

Hopefully.

Hopefully I continue to do that.

But I think what we're telling our listeners is that know that everything about your life is perfect for you if you are designed to grow.

Imagine a kid,

And this happens all the time,

Who doesn't want to learn,

Right?

And he's forced to sit in class from 8 AM till 3 PM or 5 PM every single day.

He's going to have a terrible time.

And that will go on from age five until if they go to college,

Age 21,

22.

That could be a terrible life.

Somebody doesn't want to learn,

Who's forced to be in a learning environment,

Is going to have a terrible life.

And so often the reason we're not enjoying life is not because things aren't going as we want them to go.

It's because we're not in a learning mode about life.

And when you understand that,

That again,

Like I said,

Unlike maybe in school where the teachers might not be perfect,

Life is the perfect teacher.

What's so interesting when you say that,

Because in terms of parenthood,

I've enjoyed the most of the times when I have been learning from our kids.

And that's why I write about them all the time.

I mean,

Really,

If I think about the times that I taught them something versus the time I looked,

I'm like,

Wow,

This is what they taught me completely life changing.

And if I have to think back to the time where I first learned from one of our kids,

It's still a little painful for me because it was with David.

I don't even think I've told him this,

Our firstborn.

And he's very much,

And it's interesting too,

Is when you look back,

Once your kids are a little bolder,

You look back at them at age two or three,

You could see like their personality peeking out through that little body.

So he was very curious and he was always moving around and he liked to build things and break them down and build them again.

He could spend hours building cars and blocks.

And there's this one cupboard in our apartment that I had water bottles,

1.

5 liters.

And he used to like to throw them all out and then crawl in the cupboard and then close the door because he could fit in it.

And I would let him do this,

But it was like an hour of it.

And I'm like,

Okay,

David,

This is the last time.

It was probably three,

Maybe two and a half because he was crawling and he kept doing it and he was laughing.

And I remember I got stressed and I was like 24,

Right?

I got some like David and I kind of raised my voice a little bit and he got this lump of lip with tears in his eyes and he looked at me and then he looked down and he looked at me and he crawled away like defeated.

And it broke my heart.

I was like,

Why would you break his spirit like that?

Why did you do that?

So what you had to clean up.

Who cares,

Right?

So it was the first chipping away of letting go of my controlling nature and perfectionism.

And he just taught me that with what?

A look,

Right?

With the truest,

Purest look of like,

Mom,

I'm just playing with the water.

And then if I look back and I had to define what each of our kids has taught us,

It would be this.

So David with his eagerness to change,

Not just his ability,

But eagerness.

Like the story I've told before where he sits around at dinner tables asking everybody,

You know,

What do you think my worst character trait is or what do you think I need to change?

Like complete ego annihilation.

If I look at Josh,

Kindness for sure.

Kindness that is not easily available to most of us,

Even behave in that way,

Which comes naturally to him.

Now you have a ton of examples of how he does that each and every day.

Miriam,

Her independence,

But also her self-assuredness.

I've shared that story too on prom,

Right?

Prom night,

There was a party,

She was uncomfortable,

She wasn't having fun,

She'd had a headache.

And she decided to remove herself and leave whenever she wanted.

And like it takes,

I could not have done that at 18.

And Abigail with her empathy and her problem solving ability and her creativity and her love.

So and when all of those qualities,

Right,

I look at all of them and like,

Wow,

I want to be more like that.

And how could I be more like that?

And if you can imagine if I just led the role as a parent only and never took the role as a student with my children,

How much would I have missed out on?

Absolutely.

How would you share a relationship or a situation that was negative that taught you an important lesson that you learned in the first place?

I've learned so many of those.

I try to forget them.

Oh,

Really?

A negative one that taught me something.

Yeah,

I mean,

I've talked about,

I mean,

Honestly,

If I have to look back at my life,

It was really,

It's like the movie Pretty Woman,

Julie Roberts says,

Well,

The bad stuff's easier to believe.

So I remember all the negative things and for a while I believed them.

And then I decided that this is no way to live a life and I'm destroying myself and making myself small and smaller.

So then when I'd have negative interactions or people had negative feedback,

I was like,

Oh,

Okay,

I don't believe this.

I'm not going to believe this.

I choose me.

And what can I learn from it?

So I think it was every step of the way it was from,

You know,

It's interesting is that until third grade,

Just happy,

Happy,

Happy,

Happy,

Happy.

And then I kind of went a little down for a while and then up again.

But even when I found my purpose,

You know,

There's plenty of people who are going to show you all the reasons you can't have things or shouldn't dare want.

And what did they teach you?

Well,

After I got so much negative attention,

I thought,

Well,

If I am threatening people so much that they feel like they need to completely smush me down,

I must have something important to do,

One.

And I also must have something to say.

So I'm going to do that.

Right.

And I had never thought about writing books.

I had never thought about public speaking.

I had never thought about any of the things I'm doing now.

And it was only by people telling me you can't do you can't do your nothing,

Which people have told me that it really made me take myself more seriously.

Like why am I such a threat to you?

Oh,

I know.

I'm actually going to write a book because I never thought about that.

So very cool.

So as I was thinking about this,

One of the,

For me,

I find it so exciting is,

As I mentioned every single day,

I don't start,

I try not to start my day before studying something that inspires me anew.

So I thought of two of what for me were the most inspiring lessons that I learned literally for me and I hope for many of our listeners.

And you come across a teaching and it was like,

Clearly this is life changing.

So the first one is a concept that is based on a teaching from the Bible.

The word ha'yom or the word today is spoken about a lot.

And there's a phrase that the ancient sages use,

Which is to say that every single day all the important things in your life should be experienced as new.

Now the reality is that most people are not like that,

Right?

I mean,

We speak about whether we're at a wedding,

We speak about this,

The fact that most people are more excited in the dating phase or even on the day of the wedding,

Or even in the honeymoon more than on day 100 or year 50 or year 10,

Year two,

Right?

This acceptance that most of us have that things are supposed to get old.

And in getting old,

They lose their excitement.

And I remember this teaching and again,

I try to think about it every single day,

That it's based on a phrase called really maybe my favorite phrase in the ancient wisdom of Kabbalah,

Which is Ein Sof,

Which means the endless.

And that means that the energy that gives life to everything that exists,

Be it the cup on this table or this microphone or me and you is endless.

Which also therefore means that everything in our lives,

Everything,

Every relationship,

Every situation can and is meant to fulfill us endlessly as in the first moment.

So both constant renewal and constant excitement.

And if you understand that,

Right?

First of all,

It's a whole new way to view life,

Right?

And you have to be okay with the change that occurs within those things that you love and appreciate.

Well,

Hopefully because you are able to with this consciousness and therefore this understanding on its own is really transformational.

With that consciousness,

You're actually able to extract new energy,

New excitement,

New love in a relationship,

New inspiration in a job,

But to know that it's there,

Right?

How many people,

And probably even myself before I came across this teaching thought,

No,

It's the natural way of the world that in a relationship just things hopefully stay okay but they can't be as exciting and inspiring as day one.

And whatever it is that you're doing for a job in life,

It's going to be hopefully good for you and you'll enjoy it forever or however long you work,

But that it can be renewed with excitement and passion every single day.

What about a body that slows down and a person can't use it the way that they used it?

So I'll share with you a teaching again.

I found this very exciting and maybe this is a little bit above the head.

This is the second teaching?

No,

No,

It's related to you because you asked.

I was going to share this.

So there's this discussion in the Torah and the Bible about the death of Sarah and one of the great Kabbalists in explaining the process of death,

He says,

People who are spiritual,

People who are connected to what we call the light of the creator,

As they get older,

They get happier because they sense that they're getting closer to the eternal,

Right?

And a big concept,

Most of us think death is a terrible thing and that's the way many of us experience it in this physical world.

But on a deeper level,

What happens is that the soul leaves the impermanent and is getting closer to the eternal.

And therefore many of the great spiritual giants,

When they got older,

They actually got more excited about getting closer to the eternal.

Again,

I know that's a big concept,

But my point is knowing and living your life from age,

However young you learn this lesson at,

That everything has the ability to be renewed all the time changes your perspective on life.

And then yes,

Of course,

How do you do it?

Well,

It begins with this understanding,

With this consciousness.

But for me,

Knowing that has been a tremendous opening to live life in a different way and to expect life to open up in different ways.

The only way you're going to feel like that when you're much older is if you live like that each day.

Yes,

Exactly.

And by the way,

Which reminds me of this,

But that's something that I was going to share as one of my teachings.

But going back to the first point we made,

Because I think it's so important.

I hope that if there's one thing that our listeners leave this episode with is the renewed invigoration to make sure that they study wisdom every single day.

Because when a person is young and everything's going great,

Some people are drawn to wisdom,

Some people are not.

At a certain point in life,

Every one of us is going to have this.

When we get older often,

When things happen often later in life,

One of the reasons why it's so important to gain wisdom now is because we're going to need it.

I think I need it every day,

But you'll need it at some point in your life.

And at that point,

It might be too late to try to learn it all.

So if you've spent your entire life gaining wisdom and really living in a different place of consciousness,

Then when you get older,

You see things in a different perspective.

I can say this again,

But I often share this,

But with my mother,

Not only in getting older,

But also in going through her last year in this physical world,

Where you saw somebody who because they directed their lives and wisdom that they learned and the way they lived their lives,

Even in the most terrible situation,

Again,

What one can and would see as a terrible situation,

She was filled with happiness and excitement.

I think a big part of that too was she spent her days sharing.

For sure.

For sure.

And going outside of her comfort.

For sure.

For sure.

But I would really,

Again,

Really ask our listeners,

You need wisdom.

You need it today.

We said that before.

You will need it at some point.

Gain it now.

So,

We're going to do what we usually do.

I'm going to take it to a different place.

We're going to come back and go deeper.

I was really inspired by Anne Sullivan.

Do you know who she is?

No,

I don't.

You do.

I do.

And Abigail reminded me of her recently because she was learning about Helen Keller and Anne Sullivan was her teacher.

So,

One of the most famous teachers in history actually.

And she's remembered for her life changing work.

I think everyone knows who Helen Keller is,

But she was deaf and blind and mute.

And she had no way of communicating with the world,

I think,

Until age six when she met her teacher.

And Anne Sullivan was 20 years old when she came to live with her,

Who also suffered from limited hearing,

From a childhood trauma.

And she taught her,

Which I thought this part was really interesting,

She observed Helen Keller's infant cousin that learned language just by being spoken to.

Right?

I mean,

Think back to the time.

She's just watching this baby and the baby is not speaking.

You don't know if the baby understands anything,

But they're constantly hearing words all the time.

So,

What Anne Sullivan did is she would finger words into Helen's hand and all day long.

Like she'd spell out words like cat,

H,

Right around the palm of her hand,

T.

She learned 575 words.

You said cat,

H?

I said hat.

Oh,

Sorry.

Thank you,

Sweetie.

Cat.

I was going to tell you,

Was she saying chat?

So in the first six months alone,

She learned 575 words just from that.

So what I think is beautiful about this,

I think she was six,

But she was willing,

Anne Sullivan was willing to teach in ways that had never been done before in order to honor the student's unique desire and potential.

And that for me is the teaching that really stood out there because we see it,

Right,

With the book I just wrote with learning differences.

I mean,

I get calls from parents often more and more,

And maybe it's that we're more aware.

I mean,

I'm not going to go into all the reasons why I think it's more prevalent today,

But often we try to fit people in a cookie cutter version of life.

And this is the way you should learn.

If you can't learn like everybody else,

There's something wrong with you or you're unteachable or you're stupid,

Where this great teacher found her way by just looking at,

Okay,

Who am I working with?

What is her desire and what is her potential?

And we know Helen Keller had a big desire,

But nobody could meet her.

Absolutely.

I think you touched upon a very important point,

Which again,

I think is so important that we've spoken all along about the importance of being a student.

I think it's also important that we understand that we're all teachers,

Whether you see yourself like that,

If you're a friend,

If you're a parent,

If you're a sibling,

You are a teacher.

And wouldn't it be great if the teacher had some wisdom to impart to their children,

To their brothers and sisters,

To their spouses.

And I think too often,

Again,

We assign,

Oh,

They're teachers.

They're the experts.

Right.

But you have to be a teacher.

But you just have to look and have a desire to teach,

To do good,

To make a difference,

To create change.

Right.

And then of course have information.

But what did she do in this situation?

She observed,

She had a big desire to help.

And she observed something that was working in the world.

And then she looked at a problem that wasn't and said,

Okay,

How can I be the change?

Right.

Right.

But again,

What I'm saying to all of our,

Every single one of you,

Our listeners- Has that ability.

Not only ability,

You are a teacher,

Whether you like it or not.

The question is only going to be,

What are you going to be teaching?

Are you going to be teaching from a place of wisdom that hopefully you've been gaining,

Hopefully at least after this podcast on a daily basis,

Or are you going to impart the opposite of wisdom,

Which also happens often?

Yes.

Yes.

I do,

Because you're taking me somewhere else.

I just want to quote Anne Sullivan,

Because I was really inspired by this.

She said,

I'm convinced that the time spent by the teacher in digging out of the child which she has put into him for the sake of satisfying herself,

That it has taken root,

Is so much time thrown away.

It's much better,

I think,

To assume the child is doing his part and that the seed you have sown will bear fruit in due time.

It's only fair to the child anyhow,

And it saves you unnecessary trouble.

She's saying basically that- Don't think that you're not being successful.

Teachers are looking like,

What did you learn?

They're testing him.

What did you get from me?

What information did I give you?

Instead of saying,

Okay,

I'm trusting that the student's also doing their part,

And it's going to reveal itself.

Don't put the cart before the horse.

Allow the child to flourish.

Plant the seed.

Your part is to teach.

Allow the student to learn.

Because I think that's the other part too.

Give them their time to learn.

Yes.

Often if our ego is really involved,

Because we're talking about what is a teacher,

If you're teaching from that place of like,

I am the teacher and I am the smartest one and do as I say,

And by the way,

What have you learned from me?

You're also going to be limited in your ability to teach.

That's a very important point,

Again,

Because I think also often,

Again,

We see it often as parents or even teachers where you speak about something,

You give a lesson and you're hoping that you want to see the results tomorrow or you write immediately.

And we've seen this often where,

Again,

Not always,

But the lesson doesn't seem to have taken root.

But then a day later,

A week later,

A year later,

10 years later,

Suddenly you see,

Oh,

They actually were listening.

Oh,

It actually did have an effect.

You have to let a child mature.

And not just a child.

It could be your husband,

It could be your mother.

Yeah,

Husbands for sure.

It could be,

Yeah,

Especially a husband.

Right.

But we look for immediate effect,

Immediate change.

And it's never like that.

And silly because we don't expect that of ourselves.

So there's one more person I want to speak about.

Sure.

Again,

Abigail inspired me with being obsessed with Harry Potter.

So that's JK Rowling.

I love her story.

We've heard different bits and pieces.

So she ended up selling 500 million copies.

That's not how it started.

This is how it began.

Almost as many as you get to be different.

You're cute.

So she was on a train ride from Manchester to London and she formed the entire story from an idea and started developing the story of Harry Potter on that journey.

Not a long ride,

Right?

Unfortunately,

Her mother died later that year,

Which halted her writing process for some time.

It took her seven years for her to implement her ideas into a story and get them published.

I just love everything about her because as an author,

Writer,

Somebody like,

Okay,

Let me get to the rest of her story,

But it's just for me,

Very relatable and inspiring.

That's why I really wanted to just touch on this today.

So she was married in 1992,

Then divorced soon after.

And at this time she was jobless,

Divorced and a single mother.

It was the most devastating period of her life.

She contemplated suicide.

Can you imagine if she actually did that?

Then nobody would have had been able to see this beautiful creation come to life.

And she had so much to offer,

Right?

She's a philanthropist.

She's a business.

She's a film producer now.

Author like,

Because that was her state of mind then.

And she didn't think like what?

Single mom,

Jobless,

Divorced,

Lost her mother.

She was clinically depressed,

But still she kept writing.

In 1995,

Rowling finished the manuscript for her first book,

But she had no money to publish the book independently.

So she approached around 12 major publications.

I don't know if I could have done 12.

I mean,

After three,

Maybe I'd be despondent.

They all rejected the Harry Potter script.

She kept approaching publications until finally a small publication took her on and printed,

Guess how many copies?

How many?

Yes.

3,

000?

1,

000.

Wow.

Definitely less than the gift of being different.

1,

000.

She teaches us the beauty of rejection and failure like nobody I've ever seen in this regard.

And she also teaches us resiliency.

And Rava Shlaq talks about this,

Right?

Falling to rise,

Right,

Is a fundamental part of our growth.

So you need to fall in order to rise.

And we know this on some level,

But who really would take that much rejection and keep falling and keep fighting,

Keep moving forward.

So for me,

This is a really powerful teaching.

And I think also it's something that we should speak more about openly and freely so that everybody can accept that as absolutely,

Like,

Forget about grades and forget about tests and like,

You failed.

Okay,

Great.

So what do we need to learn?

What do we need to do?

I wish that that would be the system in schools today.

Nice.

So if you would leave our listeners.

No,

I just spoke.

If you would leave our listeners,

Michael,

With something,

What would that be?

It would be that I believe strongly that without consistent gaining of wisdom,

None of us can achieve,

Forget about our lives,

Right?

Our day as it is meant to be.

Levels of happiness,

Levels of certainty,

Levels of clarity.

I found that in my 49 years so far,

That is the only way to live inspired and joyful and with clarity.

So I strongly,

Strongly ask our listeners to make studying again from a teacher who's in this physical world,

From books of ancient teachers,

Find your daily inspiration.

It's necessary.

It's not a luxury and it's not just for people who have the time and it's not just for people who are spiritual.

It's not even just to have a topic to talk about.

I think that we could have our listeners try this for 40 days.

For 40 days,

Commit to studying something every day.

It could be 10 minutes,

15 minutes.

Maybe the more you study,

The longer you're going to want to study,

But,

And mark your moods,

Mark your perspective,

Mark what,

Like really pay attention to it and you'll see.

And I would add to that is that especially if things aren't going right,

If you're feeling down,

If you're not feeling lack of clarity,

Then especially.

That's most of the world.

But then also what happens then,

Oh,

I feel better now.

And then you stop studying and.

.

.

It happens all the time.

I see it all the time.

And again,

It doesn't make a person a bad person or life is not going to be good.

It's not going to be as it's supposed to be.

So I'd like to share a letter that we received from one of our listeners.

You have three in front of you.

Oh,

I have more than that.

Dear Monica and Michael,

I have been tempted to write you an email for some time now to thank you for all the wonderful content you share.

And I finally wrote it after listening to the Alacrity episode.

So we have an effect.

I listen to your podcast almost every day while putting the sleeve,

My one year old,

And it has changed my life.

I love,

By the way,

When they give us.

.

.

When they're listening.

Yeah.

When,

Where,

What they're doing,

It gives me a visual.

I love that.

So to our listeners,

I'm sure you all.

.

.

Be very specific.

Yes.

Every time I'm in the middle of a hardship,

I can hear Michael's voice saying,

Quote,

This is an opportunity for you to grow.

And oh,

Monica,

I resonate so much with you.

I am very vocal and my husband doesn't even know sometimes when he's having a hard time.

And as a mom,

I can't thank you enough for being so open and sharing your journey as a mother.

You guys are such an inspiration for my life and my marriage.

Will be moving to the United States soon,

And I wasn't very happy about it,

But after a good number of episodes,

I have accepted that this is what I need to do to grow.

And it has made my life easier,

Way easier.

Each episode is like,

Oh my God,

This makes all the sense.

Almost like if I knew all these and forgot it.

You opened my eyes to so much knowledge.

I can't even describe it.

I will be forever grateful because now my baby boy will be able to grow,

Having a more meaningful life and access to all these wonderful tools that Kabbalah has to offer.

You are such a blessing.

We are very lucky.

We have access to your teachings.

I'm sure the world is already a better place.

Thanks to you.

Oh,

I love that.

Very sweet.

Thank you so much for sharing this.

And as I remind our listeners,

Every episode,

We are inspired by these stories by you sharing with us.

Monica said specifically where you listen to the episodes,

But also more importantly,

What it does for you in your life.

So please,

Please,

Please make sure to send us all of your stories,

Comments,

Inspirations,

Questions to monicaandmichaelatkabbalah.

Com.

It inspires us.

It inspires our listeners.

Also,

Not to forget,

Support this podcast by sharing it with everybody you know.

Going to Apple Podcasts,

Giving five star reviews and writing reviews,

Positive reviews,

Of course.

And as always,

I hope you enjoyed listening to this podcast as much as we enjoy recording it.

Stay spiritually hungry.

LA