I'm broken.
Resting in the love of God or an earthly beloved.
We may grow to love ourselves out of a sense of being loved.
Listeners from religious traditions that include belief in God may well experience the love of God as the foundation on which love of self is established.
The love of another person may form a similar foundation for many listeners.
If we truly and profoundly know ourselves loved,
Whether by God or another person,
We will be changed.
It must also inevitably change how we feel about ourselves.
For to truly know myself as loved in this way and to rest in that and to desire in return that loving nature for myself in my interactions with others and still to hold a mean,
Judging,
Blaming spirit toward myself is almost impossible.
This does not mean I will not strive for a clear understanding of my behavior and responsibilities,
But rather that in time the attitude with which I hold myself and that knowledge will be transformed.
Of course,
For most of us,
This is a journey of a lifetime.
You may find it helpful to practice resting in the memory of the love of others or the love of God.
Most of us spend too little time resting in these experiences of love and delight.
The natural ground of self-compassion is often this experience of being loved.
Take some time to settle yourself in a place where you will not be disturbed.
You might support yourself in this process through mindfulness,
Meditation or prayer.
Become aware of your breath.
Follow it for a time in and out.
Allow your attention to rest on your breath.
Gently and repeatedly return your attention to your breath.
Some people find it helps to focus on the sensation of breathing in one place,
Perhaps the nose,
Shoulders,
Chest or abdomen.
When you become distracted and aware of thoughts,
Ever so briefly note the content and then gently return your focus to the sensations of breath in this part of your body.
Once you are settled,
Using your imagination,
Bring to mind an experience of feeling deeply loved.
This might be an experience of being loved by God or being loved by an earthly beloved.
Use your imagination to the full.
Recall the place,
Time and situation.
Recall all that you could see,
Touch,
Taste,
Smell and hear.
Recall,
If you can,
The feelings you experienced,
The thoughts you had.
And how you or those around you behaved.
As you feel able to,
Allow yourself to rest in that experience of love.
This may involve resting in a particular warmth of emotion,
A mental image of being loved or particular words that touched you.
In whatever way feels right for you,
Rest in that feeling of being loved.
As you feel able to,
Allow that feeling of being loved to touch you and to soak into you.
You may wish to visualise that love changing you from the inside.
Take the time that you need to complete this exercise in an unhurried way.
This sort of visualisation can often feel like an intense experience.
When you are ready to leave this exercise,
Allow yourself some time to slowly shift from an inner focus back to a sense of yourself in the present moment.
It may help to notice the sensation of your body against your chair,
The sounds you hear around you and finally the things you see around you.
As you emerge from that focus place,
Remind yourself that this is an activity and place that you can return to at any time as you continue your journey into self love and self compassion.
Take some time to notice your responses.
What was this exercise like for you?
You may wish to journal about this experience or discuss it with a friend.
