Resilience - The Power Of Tolerance

Take happiness; Do not take sadness. It’s an interesting way to look at life! Of course, there are people who try to insult others & criticize a lot! But do you get deeply affected? So, when someone is giving you something bad, do you take it or how much do you accept. Do you have to accept the insults? Is there a bad feeling in the mind? Can you change the discomfort? Think of your self-respect. Who am I?

Transcript

I'm Shanti. Welcome soul to soul. And we're going to look again at resilience, But this time we are looking at the power of tolerance. So to take happiness, My name is Rose from Inner Space in Glasgow and I'm welcoming you to this program Take Happiness, Don't Take Sadness. It is an interesting way to look at life. Of course there are people who try to insult others and criticize a lot, So we have actually have it in our nature to be super critical. And we have to catch ourselves now and think don't do it because if I criticize others, By the law of energy others will criticize me. We don't like being criticized and others probably don't like being criticized either and they can feel it although they might not show it. So there are people who try to do insult others and criticize a lot, So it could even mean ourselves here. But do you get deeply affected feeling you're being criticized? So others will feel that if we're criticizing them. So when someone's giving you something bad, We've heard this a lot actually in different ways, Do you accept it? Or how much do you accept? What do you accept? Do you have to accept the insults? Do you have to accept them? Is there a bad feeling in your mind when someone insults you? And can you change that discomfort? So think about your self-respect. Who am I? So someone's criticizing me, Do I feel very downtrodden and feel I don't deserve that criticism? Or do I remember who I am and stay quite upright and okay? Okay because I know it's a habit and we all have the habit, So it's good to look at the self and recognize the fact we do have the habit as quick as a flash. We're finding the area to criticize and why do we criticize? Because we're all different. We're not the same, Never have been the same and never ever will be the same. What a dull world it would be if we were all the same. So when I can remember that and if people are not thinking like that they will continue to criticize the difference, But the difference is the wonder of life. So don't get put down by the criticism, Just keep remembering that you know what it's all about. Why is there discontentment with others? If you judge others and say that they are wrong then there's dissatisfaction. But it's okay to be aware of different characters because we're all different and the wonder and the speciality is usually in the difference. Someone's good at this and no one else is good at that maybe, Not in the same way and someone's good at something else so they don't do the way I do it, But it's rather a wonder. So it's okay to be aware of different characters and understand what people's personalities are like. Yes be aware, Yes also be careful not to get pulled into the despondency actually of the criticism, But if observation becomes judgement, Criticism and dislike then you've lost the power of tolerance. You're not able to tolerate because it's very very harsh if I'm just judging them on their criticism. But this doesn't mean that you can't act and play your role in life because you are the way you are, You are you. So you can still act and interact with someone who's criticising you but without anger or aggression. And we have a quote here from Michelle Obama, When they go low that is it's very low energy to criticise someone so it means when we are criticised or pulled down we go high. If we tolerate we go high but if we come back down into the level of criticism we also go low. So when they go low it's an opportunity for us to go high. So if you feel forced to tolerate, Forcing yourself to put up with it, Forcing yourself, Forcing yourself, I have to tolerate this, Then this will be very stressful. You'll feel huge discomfort. But the real power is to tolerate out of love, That is out of understanding how it works and that people have the habit of criticism. Doesn't mean that they don't love you underneath it all, Respect you underneath it all, Come into harmony with you when they can and you know all sorts of nice energies are mixed up in that if we just don't get upset by the criticism. Real power is to tolerate out of love. So to understand that they're finding a fault in me because they want to get it right, Because they don't see it to be the way they would like it to be. So this can actually be something for me to understand about them. You can tolerate because you have understood the spiritual law and the spiritual law is the law of life is love. And the other part of that is that you are love. It sounds like a big thing but every day people do this. They look at the law of life and they have love. So the law of life is love. So a lot of what you described was tolerating something that's coming to me. Sometimes I feel like I have to tolerate myself, Like I'm not able to maybe exactly think or feel the way I want to feel or respond at a certain moment. It's almost like I'm having to tolerate my own limitations at that stage. Could you say something about that? Is there an element of the power of tolerance involved there as you go through a change process? That's a very good question. I have to get to know myself and know that underneath anything that I see that's negative in myself is my power of goodness. So I really have to see that the good part of myself, The loving part of my energy and sometimes we're despondent because we do our best to keep showing and putting forward the loving part of our energy and it's as if nobody sees it and they're still criticising me. And then I myself, If I'm not seeing it myself, I'll be very despondent because I'm expecting others to see this goodness in me but I'm not feeling it myself so if I'm not feeling it how can others see it? So they will then be apprehensive of me and criticise me and I myself will start to criticise myself and think well I think I might be doing everything but nothing seems to be working. That's because you're not doing everything. You're not reminding yourself of your wonder because when we start to do meditation it's all about the wonder of the truth of the self. It doesn't matter how negative we become or how others treat us. The truth is the truth and the truth is that we're beings of light and our original nature is beautiful and our original nature is loving and tolerance doesn't even enter into it at that point. It's when we come into relationship with others and with ourselves that this word tolerance comes in. It means I have to appreciate myself but also appreciate others. Okay? So if I daily start by reminding myself of that foundation and feel that love, That truth then there's a chance that I won't need to force the tolerance. It'll be more like a flow. Yeah, Yeah and for that you would really need meditation and if possible on a daily basis and then be aware of what you're starting to learn about yourself and others and keep yourself in check so as to keep your energy high because it's ourselves that put ourselves down the most actually. We think that can't mean me. I'm not doing that. I can't but you can. It's all through your thoughts. It's your thoughts that create your energy. When you spoke about how tolerance allows you to act but not out of anger and aggression but you can still act. So I'm now thinking yeah there's people, There's the self but there's also situations like you can witness very traumatic things even hundreds of miles away now on the news and I would need the power of tolerance sometimes in those situations to keep myself steady. So how does that work if you're having to witness something very traumatic? What would be the accurate use of the power of tolerance to stay resilient? I can only answer what I do for myself. I can find myself ready to jump in there to feel I want justice. I don't like what's happening and then I remind myself it's actually nothing to do with me. We're all actors and everyone acts out their role and if I've not been there at the table when they were creating the rules for that one and they had decided this was the law and this was the policy and this was what was going to happen I can't do anything about it. So for me to go down the trauma of this is wrong, This is terrible, What terrible things happened and why has that happened is futile. Everyone's an actor and for some reason what ever their act is that's what it is and that's what it will always be and they're going to play that role out. Now if I actually had them sitting in front of me and I had a chance to talk to them and I had the power to change what was going to happen that's a different matter but if I don't have that they're not in front of me so what I can do is to constantly send out good wishes to that soul and that situation and feel that perhaps that will touch, Well it will touch them but whether it'll make any difference but then again it will make a difference but then maybe they have to play a certain role and that's the way it is so I have to understand the drama of life or else I'll keep myself in such a stage of not being able to control the world I cannot control every soul on the planet but I can be a well-wisher for every soul on the planet no matter what they do. I suppose again it's just multiplying the damage because I'm watching the damage happen there and then I'm being damaged as well so yeah you know that's not wise that's not no I don't care but to be useful I need to stay cool yeah yeah and it's a bit like the circles of influence as well isn't it? What can I control and influence? See we want to be controllers actually and we forget that yes we're all controllers but we're supposed to be controllers of ourselves if everyone was a controller of their own energy our own nature is really beginning at the beginning very beautiful there wouldn't be any big trauma we would be very careful of each other and of the planet and of the resources and of our interaction with others we'd be very careful and kindly and loving but it isn't like that at the moment there's so many people so many things are happening and so you know it's like watch the drama. So if you were saying if this person's in the room or there's something I can say or something I can do I do it because often I know in the world and I've seen posters and things in the past things like zero tolerance you know for example for violence in the workplace or things like that and so this power of tolerance that we're talking about different kind of tolerance here it's not putting up with bad behavior that's coming at you over a long period of time it's a sort of on an energy level keeping your energy steady. What practical things could you do if someone is consistently being rude, Insulting, Critical over a long period of time? I would step back a lot from being in too much interaction with them if possible like I would smile and be friendly and give good wishes and good vibes but I wouldn't get into interaction where they're definitely going to have a wrong attitude back if I could and if I couldn't then I would keep my own counsel as much as possible and keep a smile on my face and keep remembering who I am. So I've heard you say before as well it's almost like I'm allowing them to continue the wrong pattern or the negative pattern of behavior if I don't move away or try and stop. Yeah so yeah the only way you can not be involved actually then it's not your responsibility for their actions but if I keep on agitating their negative ways or I keep buying into it or I keep getting worried or despondent by it I'm still connected to them I'm still connected to all the wrong that they're doing. It's quite subtle I know it's kind of my policy to go very silent, Step back, Smile, Don't fall out with them but I don't support that which they're up to and if ever get a chance and it's okay to tactfully say something I might but then again usually that doesn't work either if it's really negative but yeah you just have to keep your own energy buoyant. I think that's the secret in everything keep your own energy up and running don't get involved in too much negative stuff. Sometimes we'll do it to save face we might think that we have to show that we're tough and strong or we have to be in there or we should give our very positive input but it'll just get trampled and then it'll look as if to others if they're there that negative's the way forward that one they won and you can look very weak but then you shouldn't mind looking weak either if it means that it's the best thing to do at that moment. It's it is something to think about really this power tolerance. So it's back to the having faith in the self asking yourself who am I and and that awareness that the law of life is love. Yeah the law of life is love anything we dislike is against the law because you can change dislike into harmful and to hatred and to fearful you can change it into all sorts of very negative energies so I shouldn't have dislike for anyone no matter what they're like because whatever they're like that's how they are at that point of time and they're playing out their role. And it's just you're just seeing everything like a prompt and that nothing the aim is to let nothing prompt me into a unpleasant response so that I have that much power of tolerance that can always be loving always be kind always be peaceful yeah that sounds very high like Michelle Obama said that sounds like you're going really high. It sounds like a very very big ask but if I keep remembering my self-respect I'll do my best to be like that because that's my self-respect that's why I'm using my energy someone might be being hateful but I don't want to be hateful I don't want to put my energy through the track of being hateful I want to keep my energy okay okay so if they even they want to be hateful to me well fine that's the way you are. Yeah not wanting to get into the battle. No. Yeah because peace we talk about peace and meditation peace is my original nature so I have to actually be the example of my nature show who I am I am peaceful I am loving and if I use these energies I'll be tolerant of others tolerant means understanding being there for them sympathizing I can see how it ties with resilience because the other way is utterly exhausting the battle the debate the hatred the dislike the criticism it's just so tiring there's the peace love so nurturing yeah yeah the simplicity and the other way never has a good outcome no never you make an enemy and you remember for years that this happened and that one was horrid and I'm sure they've never changed and you have a bad memory track of whatever happened and unless you're able to change it but it was in the past now so you'd have to try to really be going some to pour in good energy now so so how do you pour in good energy every day it's through meditation yeah and whatever comes to your mind of the past you cannot change it but you can change how you see it now by thinking well I didn't know how to handle that at the time I didn't know what to do I myself was intolerant at that point but now I give forgiveness I send good wishes I send love understanding like a spiritual medicine so I think we'll have some meditation okay okay so we sit peacefully and quietly and remember who we are and I love this phrase when they go low we go high remember our beautiful nature Ransyoga meditation takes us back to our beginning time our original nature of peace and love when we got on with everyone when we interacted beautifully and so we want to do this now it gets harder actually is the drama gets less like this it doesn't support what we do but we have to support what they do in the right way with the right correct energy I am peace I am love I'm a being of understanding and I have respect for all others and I know that the journey is such that the challenges will come and to tolerate is the most incredible energy but to tolerate out of love is because you have understood the spiritual law and the law of life is love and that you are love and the more I think of this maybe the more I teach myself to know this to feel this to practice this everyone around me is my brother and there's a great sickness of violence sadness worry anxiety all around us so I need to help by being tolerant and loving and understanding remember we are love you are love I am love and you can tolerate because of understanding the spiritual law of life of love I am a soul and I remember the one above this gives me strength the ocean of love the ocean of peace the ocean of happiness peace love and happiness if I can remember this throughout the day it makes it easy it's a very powerful slogan peace love happiness on something you you you