Saying No Isn’t the Only Issue… There’s More...

It's very common that a stress factor is when people are not really strong in saying no to things or to people.

That's very common.

But there's another thing to this,

Because quite a few of us,

Myself included,

Have difficulty not volunteering to things.

For instance,

If you are at a school meeting and somebody's asking,

The teacher is asking,

Who can bake cake for the class reunion?

Or the sports thing with the children,

Who can wash the football equipment for next week?

If nobody volunteers,

How does that make you feel?

I can tell you for me it's been a struggle throughout the years,

Because again and again I found myself,

Because nobody else did,

Then I'll do it.

So I've been doing those things,

I just said,

And I've been on boards in kindergarten and yeah.

So if you recognize any of this,

Then you might want to try this.

You should practice when somebody asks,

For instance,

The cake baking.

This is a class meeting for the parents.

Who can make the cake?

Then you should sit on your hands,

And I mean it quite physically.

You should actually sit on your hands to assist you,

Not putting up your hand.

This might seem ridiculous.

I've been practicing it with clients throughout the years.

We've been sitting on our hands in the clinic until they were numb and cold and very uncomfortable,

Just to get the feeling of how difficult it can be to resist volunteering.

But you're not the one who is supposed to do it every time.

So if you recognize any of this,

You should start practicing sitting on your hands and relax.

Somebody else will break and volunteer,

And you will be so happy that you did it.

I'm rooting for you.