Forward Bound

What do we do when the fighting is done? When we have survived, and we no longer need to struggle? We are supposed to be joyous and happy, but what do we do with the part of us that is exhausted, damaged, and feels like it needs to keep fighting? If you have these questions or have ever wondered, I hope this poem is useful to you.

Transcript

It's time for you to leave, I said. I need to start anew. It's over, And I thank you. Here, Let me find your shoes. You didn't speak and had no need. You aren't leaving anyway. No matter what I think is best, You'll have the final say. I need a change. I need to change. I can't do that with you. But as the past, As my past, Instead you took my shoe. I will live inside of you no matter where you walk. You may think you're free and clear. That's very pretty talk. Putting on my other shoe you just continued on, I determine where you go. It's my life from now on. I said some things one shouldn't say, At least just not repeat. The past of me just waited, Flexing both its feet. I want to make a change, I said. It's done. It's time to go. You have to leave. My weight's enough without you in the toe. But I'm the one who reminds you when danger comes around. I see what you have lived before, Alarms and bells I sound. Without me you will never learn the lessons from your life, How you managed to survive through torment and through strife. Without me you'll be free again to wander blind once more. Without the wisdom you have gained, Survival. But what for? What was the point of making it, Living to this day, If you ever plan to live without hearing what I say? I heard you, I told myself. I heard you, You can stop. I got your message, I heard you speak. It's time to let it drop. I need a change, I need to go. This isn't about the past. I'm not wandering around, Shouting, Alone, Free at last. I'm quietly telling you I'm leaving you behind. Thank you for your lessons. They really were divine. But you are not the best of me. The best is yet to come. I can't get there carrying you. You have to go. I'm done. Once more you just swung your feet snug inside my shoes and said with a bit of confidence, I'm not leaving, I'm you. Maybe I gave you that, Maybe yes you are. In another time and place you were the brightest star. You've missed that as I've been speaking we've walked into the night in the dark by ourselves without a single light. I'm not scared of what remains unseen deep in the dark. You've taught me I can handle all things sharp and stark. I no longer need you and now you need to go. Take the shoes, I know they fit. I'll stand barefoot in the snow. You realize then what I had done with a shock both calm and cold. I left you standing in the dark, Freezing I am, But bold. I have learned from you so much and I never will forget, But the way for me is forward for you in stone. It's set. I left you there inside my shoes and barefoot walked on ice. I could slip and I could fall. I didn't once think twice. Sitting with myself, The me that got me through, Was simply a reminder of what I had to do, What I had to sacrifice, And all the times I cried when I thought for sure that then was when I should have died. I mean no disrespect. I did give you my shoes. I want to live a forward life. It's just for me to choose. Please find a time and find a place where you can live in peace. For the service you have given me, You deserve that at least. I turned and walked away from you. I didn't hear a sound, But I was no longer listening. Good luck. I'm forward bound.

Reviews

Thank you for this brave, vivid and strong words 🙏

Thank you for this, Liza. Achingly beautiful and profound.

I saw so much of myself in your words. I am forward bound as well. In peace and love 💕

Wow! This piece is both heartwrenching and full of hope. Thank you so much for sharing!

Powerful, and delivered with brave vulnerability. Much respect to you dear Liza 🌷🌿⭐️