The Noisy Brain: A Guided Wind-Down For Men

Are you struggling to sleep?

That is okay.

You don't have to do anything.

Right now.

Cheers!

Listen to my voice.

You can close your eyes.

If you feel like it.

Get comfortable.

Relax.

Today I want to ask you if you are experiencing like a noisy brain.

So many of us have this experience,

At the end of the day,

Where our brain likes to just recount,

Tell us stories.

Of everything.

Didn't go the way we feel.

That it should.

Things that we messed up.

Ways we fell short.

Maybe not only today.

This week.

Month this year.

A whole life.

Do you know that voice?

Likes to show up.

At bedtime.

When we are trying to unwind.

And relax.

It likes to just remind us.

Of all of those things.

It'd be so frustrating.

So.

.

.

Frustrating That is you right now.

You have a noisy brain.

Stick around.

Just listen to that voice for a minute.

They might sound like you.

Perhaps it is your own expectations of yourself.

Perhaps it is sounding like a parent.

Just this voice trying to kick you when you're already tired,

Reminding you that you should have tried harder.

Or you're falling behind,

It might sound like your partner.

Sound like?

And X.

Part.

Here's what I want to tell you.

That voice.

Isn't you.

It is just.

And all.

Story.

On repeat.

We don't even need to figure out where it comes from.

But what we can do.

Is realized on some level.

That we get to choose whether we believe it.

And we get to understand.

On some level.

Why?

Same nice thing.

Doesn't mean they're true.

So why?

Might it be saying those things?

Protect you.

And some deep.

Subconscious level.

Those old stories.

Are trying to protect you from.

Harm,

Failure,

The sting of rejection.

But they're not you.

And they're not speaking truth.

Not always accurate.

So what can you do?

How can we make that voice quiet?

One thing I learned a long time ago.

Once.

Imagining that you are.

Like a parent.

To that voice.

Insulin child.

And thank it for its opinions.

Offer it a cookie.

And tell it to go and sit in the corner.

Does that work for you?

Can you imagine saying to that voice?

Thank you.

But I don't need you right now.

I am the authority of myself,

After all.

That silly voice.

You are the authority on you.

So if it feels okay.

I invite you to.

Put a hand on your face.

On your chi.

Your forehead.

And just.

Feel the warmth of your own skin.

You deserve.

To be treated gently.

Yes,

I know the stories that we're all told about masculinity and it doesn't mean that you're not strong or powerful.

Or manly.

Because you deserve to be treated gently.

Both things can be true.

And you especially.

Deserve to be treated gently.

Yourself.

I know that you are your own biggest critic.

And there is criticism coming from all angles from yourself.

From old stories you replay,

From the media,

Maybe from your partner,

Maybe from friends.

It is tough.

Being a man.

Having so many pressures and responsibilities and expectations and not being able to express how you're feeling.

Or not being able to reach out for help.

Because that feels like a weak thing to do.

I just invite you to consider that.

You can.

Reach out for help.

It doesn't make you any less of a man.

You can reach out.

For medical attention.

Doesn't make you any less of a man.

Do you know there are studies that show that men are dying.

Because they are avoiding routine medical checks.

Just think about that,

What that says about the pressure on men to be manly,

Whatever that means.

To not show signs of weakness,

Even though we are weak humans.

We are humans.

Is okay that we are not this impenetrable,

Strong,

Supernatural force.

We have bodies that require care.

We have hearts and minds that require care.

So I'm inviting you to go and do it.

See a doctor if you need to.

Don't ignore.

Messages from your body.

Don't always keep pushing through.

You don't have to keep pushing and pushing.

No matter what you think are your failures or your weaknesses or your shortcomings.

You are so tough on yourself.

And you deserve to be treated better.

And who better to start that ball rolling?

Than you.

So let's just refocus on today.

What didn't go right today,

And whatever that might be.

That you are perceiving as a failure.

Doesn't define you.

It is impossible.

To define you by one thing that didn't go exactly according to plan.

You are way too big to be defined by that.

You're not the sum of your perceived failures.

You don't need to keep replaying them and dissecting them.

You are so much more valuable than you can imagine.

And you are so much more than the stories that you tell yourself because of rejection.

Rejection stings.

And is also a part of the human experience.

It doesn't always feel fair.

Doesn't always feel easy.

But it doesn't define you.

You are worthy.

You are human.

And you are here.

Still showing up.

That says so much about you.

So much about you.

Okay,

Let's take a deep breath.

I invite you to inhale through your nose fully until you think you can't inhale anymore.

And then inhale a little more.

We're going to top it up right out.

And then a long,

Deep,

Relaxed exhale through your mouth.

Okay,

Let's do it together.

Until you are completely empty of air.

And use this moment of release.

To just check in with your body.

How is your jaw?

How your shoulders relax your belly.

Relax everything.

And even relax your butt.

You might be clenching it.

It's likely that you are.

So we're letting go.

We're letting go of the breath.

We're letting go of tension in our body.

We're letting go of the weight of expectations.

Other people's expectations,

Your own unrealistic expectations of yourself.

Let it go.

Just try,

Even a little,

Relax your grip just a little.

A little.

And I want to tell you,

You don't have to be perfect to be lovable.

Nobody on this earth is perfect.

And you are lovable.

You don't have to earn rest or comfort or praise.

You just get to have those things.

Because you are you.

They are inherently yours.

You don't have to earn any of those things,

And you can give those things to yourself.

And if nobody else says this to you tonight,

Then I want to tell you that you are doing enough.

You are enough.

I really hope that this has helped you to just take a little weight off your mind.

And encouraged you to settle down.

Relax for the night.

Knowing that you can come back anytime.

I'll be here.

Ready to offer a little comfort and just say,

Sleep well.

Good night.