Starting Over

Starting over is a challenge. The brain prefers the familiar as it is predictable and offers a false sense of security and control. Heading into a new phase, is our opportunity to become more mindful of what we can control and what we need to release if we are to spiritually, mentally, and emotionally grow. In this episode, you will find reasons to embrace starting over.

Transcript

Welcome to the Breakdown to Breakthrough podcast.

My name is Lisa A.

Romano.

I am a life coach,

Bestselling author,

YouTube vlogger,

Meditation teacher,

And expert in the field of codependency and narcissistic abuse.

I am a believer in the power of an organized mind.

My aim is to help people learn what it means to live above the veil of consciousness rather than living a reactive life.

May your heart feel blessed,

Your mind feel expanded,

And your spirit find hope as you spend time with me here at the Breakdown to Breakthrough podcast.

Thank you for being here.

In this episode,

We're going to be talking about starting over.

2020 has been quite the year,

And many of us are thinking good riddance to 2020.

It's time for me to just move ahead and just get on with my life and figure out where I want to go next.

If we want to start over,

We have the right to do that.

In fact,

Every second of our day is an opportunity to start over.

We don't have to take the old energies,

The old thoughts,

And the old beliefs into the new day unless we refuse to do the mental work and the mental effort that it takes to start over.

And so as many of you know,

Most human beings are more asleep than they are awake,

Not by any fault of their own.

It's just that the way the human mind is created,

It is more subconscious than it is conscious.

Not bad news if you come from a very functional,

Healthy home that was full of love and nurturing.

Not good news if you have been downloaded to believe that you are nothing or that you're not good enough or that your feelings don't matter or that to get by in life,

You need to subjugate yourself.

You need to acquiesce.

You need to smile on cue.

You need to not have any needs.

Not good news if you came from that childhood.

But all is not lost because you are a thinking human being and you have a magnificent prefrontal lobe.

You have the ability to tap into higher thought functions.

But this takes effort.

You must still the mind.

And there are some other things that you can do to keep you on track with moving forward when your desire is to start over.

And shouldn't we all question how we want to live?

Shouldn't we all question and imagine the direction we want to take in life?

Shouldn't we all learn to master fear?

Because fear is a mindset.

It's the result of experiences.

And they really do.

Fear really does.

These experiences that we've experienced really do have the ability to keep us stuck,

To keep us creating exactly what we don't want to create.

And I just don't think that that's good enough.

I don't think it's enough to be a human being and to recycle the past and to not learn how to master the mind,

To not learn how to tap into our God-given ability or creator-given ability to be able to imagine a different outcome.

Now,

There is a lot of things that we need to do from point A to point B.

And that's what I would like to talk to you today about.

Well,

How do I get there?

How do I start over?

What's that all about?

What do I have to do on a consistent basis?

And trust me,

If you want to change your life,

You have to change your life,

Which means you have to work at it.

It has to become a job.

And it's the greatest job.

It is the most fulfilling job that you will ever tackle in your life.

Trust me.

This is my job.

This is what I do on a daily.

And I can't imagine doing anything else.

I can't imagine not dreaming about the next great adventure or the next thing that I want to create or the next thing that I want to build or the next thing I want to experience or how I might influence someone else's life by seeing them the way I wish to be seen.

For instance,

If you have a parent in your life that's very difficult,

How would you like that parent to see you?

And if you want to be seen as kind and empathic and considerate and generous and stable,

Emotionally regulated,

Well,

That's how you envision your parent.

So you sort of like accept and surrender the way they are now.

You need to accept the past.

It's water over the wheel.

It's done.

It's already been created.

And you have to want to and diligently work mentally at seeing them differently and imagining them differently.

It's fabulous.

How many times have you thought about someone and then the phone rang?

Or you received a text supposedly out of the blue.

The field is alive.

The matrix is alive.

And we are interfacing with the matrix each and every day.

So I say,

As we step into the new year and we say good riddance to 2020,

That we all imagine outcomes that we desire.

There are going to be lots of people saying negative things about what's to come in the years ahead.

And I think it's important that we decide to say,

No,

That's not the reality that I would like to create.

Even if the politician that you wanted to win didn't win this year,

Even if the economy isn't what it used to be or you desire a different outcome,

Whatever it is,

You can stop that train and you can say,

Yeah,

That's your reality.

Yeah,

That's your projection for the future.

But in my world,

This is what I see and this is what I want to create.

And if you take the time to do this in your practice,

You can start over at any point in time.

So I'd like you to take out a piece of paper and write down the word asking.

It's an acronym.

And let's go over each letter and let's see if we can get you to start over deliberately and consciously each and every day,

Regardless of what's happening in your experience right here and right now.

So A,

A stands for accepting the past.

Very,

Very important.

If you want to start over,

You have to accept what has been.

If we're thinking about manifestations,

If you believe in the laws that govern time and space,

Then you might be inclined to understand that what is done is done.

We've already created it.

Someone else has already created it.

A group mentality has already created it.

But that doesn't mean that we can't create something different.

And it doesn't mean that at any point in time we can't start over and we can't imagine a different outcome.

I do this every single day.

If I hear a new story that I don't like,

I quickly say,

Wow,

Okay,

That is what it is.

And that did happen.

Wouldn't it be awesome if this happened?

Wouldn't it be awesome if that person took on those characteristics?

Wouldn't it be awesome if people felt blah,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah?

And so what's done is done.

And today is a new day.

So you really want to get to the point where you're not resisting the past.

You're not brooding over the past.

You're not crossing your arms and stamping your feet and saying,

This should not have happened.

This should not be.

It's really important that whatever is going on in your world,

Especially if it's uncomfortable,

Someone's sick,

Someone that you know might be dying,

Someone that you know might have lost a job,

Someone that you know might be struggling with an addiction,

Someone that you know might have cheated on their spouse or maybe you were cheated on.

It's really important that you move into a state of complete acceptance and surrender.

So you accept the past.

The second thing,

S stands for set your goals.

The subconscious mind needs a goal.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

You need to set time aside every single day to imagine the outcomes you desire,

To create mind movies about the things that you desire.

Where do you want to go?

What do you want to experience?

How would it feel if the exact manifestation that you desired manifested in your life?

What would that look like?

What would people be saying to you if your dream came true?

Imagine the feeling of it.

Spend every single day,

A little time every single day setting your goal,

Imagining your goal.

K stands for keep at it.

You know,

If you were to want to walk from New York to Texas,

The only it's a long walk.

I set my goal.

I accept the past.

I do what I have to do.

Now I have to keep at it.

I have to wake up every single day and walk.

I might get sidetracked,

But I have to keep at it.

So make sure that whatever your goals are that you keep at it,

You let nothing get in your way.

You go after it like you're knocking something over,

Like your life depended on that goal manifesting.

Now you don't do it with resistance.

You do it with ease.

In other words,

A little bit every day.

But you remind yourself,

You put pictures up in your house,

You journal every day,

You create a regimen and a routine around keeping at starting over,

Accepting your past and setting goals,

Seeing what your future is,

Imagining it into being.

So I stands for invite new ideas into your life.

When you are open and you get into the flow of creative thinking,

Be open to new ideas.

Actually invite new ideas into your life.

Refuse to continue to recreate the past,

Especially if the past is something that was terrible.

Don't keep going over conversations in your mind.

The minute you catch yourself rewinding a negative conversation,

Ask yourself,

Ask your mind to invite a new idea.

Imagine a different outcome.

I could also stand for imagination.

Use your imagination to invite new ideas into your life.

The other thing that you can do is invite new pathways.

So don't take the same route to work.

Don't take the same route when you walk your dog.

Try a different route.

Go down a different block.

Go around a different corner.

Don't go to the same drug store.

Go to a different pharmacy.

Go to a different clothing store.

Speak to different people.

Try a different cup of coffee.

Be willing to change it up.

You want your mind to stay fluid.

You want it to stay curious,

And you want your,

Basically your energy to give off the vibration that you're open to new ideas.

N stands for negotiate your obstacles.

There's nothing more troubling in the life of someone when they have set their goal and something pops up in their external world and makes them feel like,

Oh,

I just have to give this thing up.

Nothing ever works out for me.

It is the woe is me mentality.

It is tied to feeling like a victim,

And all children are victims.

All children are powerless.

And it could be some remnant of our past,

Feeling like what's the use,

Keeping us stuck,

The fear of success.

And so be careful that when bumps in the road appear,

Because they will,

This is life,

And there's just so much that you can control,

You're dealing with countless of people on a daily basis,

Countless of desires,

Countless of dreams.

So just be open to negotiating the obstacles.

Keep your eye on the goal and recognize that whatever's showing up in your experience is a problem that can be solved.

Every problem has a solution.

But if you are someone that looks at a bump in a road and you go into black and white thinking and you think,

Oh,

I have to give up my dreams now,

You're going to give up your dreams.

The dream will not manifest.

This will be a negative self-fulfilling prophecy.

You will blame the law of attraction.

You will blame your neighbor.

You will blame your spouse.

You will blame something for why your dream could not manifest.

So be sure that you're setting realistic goals that you can achieve every single day.

Even if it is just waking up and journaling and thinking about a future reality,

Even if it's just meditating,

Even if it's just changing the path that you take on the walk with your dog,

As long as you're doing something that is all about personal development,

Self-empowerment,

And giving off the sense that I'm willing to start over and I'm willing to stick to my goal and to negotiate these obstacles,

I refuse to go into black and white thinking.

I'm going to believe that there is an outcome that is going to be positive.

This is a blip on my radar.

This too shall pass,

And I'm not letting go of my goals.

I'm going to stick to my regimen.

I'm going to stick to my routine.

I'm not going to be rigid about it.

So if I can't do everything that I wanted to do,

I will do one thing today,

Even if it's just stealing my energy,

Sitting in a chair outside,

Not moving,

Trying not to think,

Suspending thought,

And just being open to new ideas.

Open your mind.

Ask your mind.

Let me see the solution to this issue.

What am I controlling,

Trying to control that I can't control?

What do I need to let go of?

So be willing to negotiate the obstacles rather than go into black and white thinking.

G stands for gain momentum.

Never ever,

Ever underestimate what momentum can do in your life.

If you continue to build momentum in one area,

Especially in the beginning when it's the most difficult,

Remember that if you're walking up a mountain,

When you first start and the mountain is very steep at the bottom,

It might be difficult for you.

But as you get closer and closer and closer to the top,

It will feel easier to you.

There's less gravity on you.

And so it's important that you think about momentum.

It's important that you think about this idea of energy.

And as someone,

I can speak with authority.

When I first started my coaching business,

It was really,

Really difficult gaining the momentum working towards writing one book.

It took a while to get that done over 12 years.

But once I got the first book published,

I was able to publish six very quickly in a very short amount of time.

And it was all about momentum.

I stuck to it.

I stuck to it.

It took me a long time to build my audiences and to build my platforms.

But now I'm at a point where it's so much easier because I've created momentum.

And so be willing to put in the effort,

Be willing to put in the work,

Be willing to set your intentions,

Be willing to accept the past,

Set your goal,

Keep at it,

Invite new ideas,

Negotiate the obstacles,

And be willing to gain the momentum over time.

And you too shall experience the new ways that you can start over,

New ways each and every day.

You'll begin to feel that your life,

Your thoughts,

Your ideas,

And everything that is about your world is actually moldable.

Thank you so much for being here.

Reviews

Great explanation, thank you! I love the acronym and will implement it into my life!

I’m so excited to put this into practise and use your acronym. It’s going to make such a difference to my choices going forward.

Thank you very much. What you shared resonated with me. I am in a rut and really need to start over in order to secure my dreams and finances. I will take what you spoke about in this session and put it into action. Wish me luck. Thank you again!!

Life changing moment, when I choose to listen. Every second of my life is up to me how to create. I feel blessed and relieved.

Fantastic work, amazing podcast to start again! Thank you

If you like ted, check mine about dreams "pedro castro henriques redx"
Congrats!

Great anagram, makes it easier to break things down into manageable steps, love it! Thanks

Thank you for this! I really needed this as I am trying to figure what’s next for me after being a stay at home mom for 12 years. Feeling inspired 🧡

Lisa feels like a real friend. She's direct and compassionate.

Thanks Lisa...Straight to the point and I loved it ❤

Wonderful learning through your words!!! Thank u so much ❤️

Helpful advice. Thank you 💙

Thank you for your insightful & wise advice. Starting over now does not feel so overwhelming! Namaste 🙏

Thank you for helping me during this time. You’re wonderful Lisa!

Amazing advice I’m so glad I came across you. This is what I need thank you 🌸

Brilliant. Exactly what I need at this moment in my life. Thank you!

Thank you for your very insightful talk.
Blessings with love

Sound advice on how to move forward when you feel stuck.

very inspiring, thank you!

Loving Lisa so much! Going through a huge life change and so happy I found her.

Wow! I’m so grateful to have found you on here. Such wisdom. I really need your message right now! Thank you 🙏