Lesson 5 - Search For Meaning Over Money (Series)

This week I address Lack-Based Money Emotions. I explain the actions and behaviors you can watch for to determine if you are experiencing Lack-Based Money Emotions. If you are, this lesson will give you insight on how to get to the root cause. Last week we discussed Fear-Based Money Emotions, so if you missed it go back and listen.

Also, be sure to use the accompanying Meditation 5 to clear away your Lack-Based Money Emotions. It won't happen overnight, you need to listen a few times to let it sync into and with your subconscious brain. See you next week.

Transcript

And As I hit record I want to say thank you.

Thank you for being here.

You're here live I am so grateful for you,

But you're also here listening to this recording and I am incredibly grateful for that,

Too And I love how we can be in this place and that place,

Right?

I'm in the I'm in the past for some of you guys.

I'm in the present for some of you guys But in the future when you're listening to this all of this is a still one-time zone We are all out.

This is all happening at once and that's a beautiful thing And I and I want you to stay connected to the present because no matter what time zone Your emotions are in it's still only right now.

That's all you have is the present moment So thank you for being present And now let's talk about these money emotions Last week we talked about fear based money emotions and I'm going to give you a really really really short recap If you didn't listen to last week's go ahead and go back and listen to it.

It's called Lesson for search for meaning over money,

But we talked about the fear based emotions being fear of making a mistake Fear of rejection or not being accepted fear of being taken advantage of and then fear of the unknown and Really fear of the unknown is big is the biggest one and it kind of encompasses all of them but they all kind of toggle and and Feed off of each other because one fear can create the other fear,

But we are only born with the fear of Loud noises falling in darkness,

Which darkness is the unknown and but every other fear comes from that fear of the unknown,

So if you can manage your emotions and Conquer your fears not that they won't still come right not that these emotions won't still come Yes,

They'll come to you.

But then you just manage them.

You don't have to hold on to them.

So today We're going to be discussing lack based emotions and this one I I See this a lot when it comes to my teachers my practitioners healers Service people especially service people I see lack based emotions a lot so if I just described you if you're in service if you're a nurse a doctor teacher a you know healer even a shaman and You have some emotions when it comes to money And I know you're like what a shaman has emotions around money in the beginning when they're still learning getting their shaman self together yes,

And so there is a transition and until you get to that position where all of your emotions are Just what they are like all emotions just are We make them bigger and more powerful than they have to be It's not having the emotion that's Getting you in trouble.

It's not managing the emotion that's getting you in trouble and making you Block the desires that you want to come into your life.

So let's talk about these lack based emotions I'm going to give you all four and then I'm gonna walk you through each one and break it down.

So the first one is feeling inadequate The second one is not We're needing to do more Needing to do more and I know that those two related and I'll tell you how they're related,

But how they're different as well the third one is equating your value with money your value is associated with money and then the fourth one is Running out running out of money or other things as well,

But just not enough So let's break those down and let me tell you how those Emotions start to equate to your actions and also how they relate to your money mentality and if you Didn't listen to the money mentality one.

You want to go back and listen to that too There's a recording for that too.

And that is lesson three so you can go back and listen to that lesson But today we're talking about the lack based emotions and the first one feeling inadequate is around Not good enough and I know I would say 50 to 75 percent of the population has that not good enough feeling at one time or another and then there's this part of the population that feels like you're too much and both of these are Feeling inadequate even though the inadequacy means that you're not like everybody you're too much Yeah,

You you might be exceptional but you don't fit in so you feel inadequate or You may be less than average or feel like you're less than average or all these people you feel like are better than you And so you feel inadequate and that's really just your perception and doesn't necessarily mean it's true So often the money mentality types that experience this often are the artists the spender and the enthusiasts so if you take the money mentality quiz,

Which You should find the money mentality quiz in my Instagram if it's not there now I'll check it and make sure it is there.

But if you find that your money mentality Is an artist of spender or an enthusiast that I want you to check your emotions around Feeling inadequate because this makes you feel like you'd sometimes have to have more have more material things right a lot of external things to make people like or accept you and It's not true,

But sometimes your emotions bring you that feeling so If then you tend to spend more money because you want to have more things so people will accept you and my men often deal with this because When they men are very competitive and most of the time most men are competitive by nature And so they are comparing themselves to another Male usually and they're wanting to have the things that that guy has And oftentimes if they don't have what they think actually more not even the same but they don't have more than what the next guy has then Society has made them believe that they're not good enough and they're not good enough until they have all the material things the house the cars the even boats and planes because That's in now,

Right?

Everybody's talking about their boat and their plane.

So especially where I am in France I'm right next door to Monaco,

But You don't have to have a vote or a plane to be loved.

Let me tell you In fact,

You can just you know,

Borrow somebody else's if you want you just just fly with them let them take on that stress but Society tries to make you feel like you have to accomplish a certain thing in order to be loved and that accomplishment comes with a certain dollar amount and then that dollar amount makes you worthy of love and so If you feel this way Then it's the emotion that you will be working on is the feeling of inadequate and that is a lack base Emotion the feeling of inadequacy.

Let me say that this can create the fake it till you make it kind of lifestyle where you're like pretending to be somebody and but on the other hand if you are Known for like old people were like,

Oh you're too much Then you may play small or you may not want people to you don't may not think they'll believe you If you have like you tell them the story about how good things are for you,

They might not believe you So you just like don't tell that part of the story You play small So those are feelings of inadequacy and some of the things that you need you may do the behaviors you may have if you feel inadequate lack based emotion number two is the need to Do more so the difference between have more and do more right?

The first one was inadequate usually around external things but you can also have some inadequacies around the work that you do do more and so this can create workaholism and People pleasing because you feel like you have to do more than your fair share.

So you have to have Seven degrees where somebody else may only have one or none where you feel like you Have to stay late come early and you may not be getting paid for this This is a money emotion where you might need to say.

Hey,

I come early.

I stay late It's time for me to get some overtime or a raise or a new position because I think I'm doing so-and-so's position But they're the ones that's getting paid for it.

Let's talk about that But if you feel like you need to be doing more then you won't be bold enough to ask for what you deserve and money is not about deserving but Because you equate doing with money you will make yourself feel like you have to do do do do do in order to deserve and even when you have a lot of times you still don't feel like you're doing enough and Trust me you are because I know your type You're either a hero or a saver or even an enthusiast and an enthusiast is all about business They just love doing business and it's all about the doing for them,

Especially External doing like where people can see what they have done.

So The you know how you watch Instagram and then they tell you they have to show you that they Saved a homeless person and gave the homeless person a house and but they have to do it on Instagram,

Right?

They couldn't just do it quietly Yeah So this is the the need to do more and to have that accolade and that let everybody see what you have done Because if you have money you have to have Deserved it and you have to be if you're gonna be a good rich person Then people need to know that you're a good rich person Which is totally untrue you can do these things from your heart and nobody ever know So if you aren't doing something for someone else then oftentimes you don't feel like you're going to be Loved you're going to be accepted And so you make sure that you do enough or do a lot In order to get that love from them because love and money are very closely related we'll talk about that as the weeks go on but You need to feel useful as well If you have are having these emotions you have this need to feel useful like you are doing your part Sometimes most times you're doing more than your part.

You're doing somebody your part in somebody else's job,

Too But again going back to my men Because this is a very masculine trait to feel like you have to do do do do do Ladies we can we can be often in touch with our Feminine side which the feminine side is more about the flow,

You know Do do less accomplish more kind of thing but but many of us females are in our masculine because society has taught us that Getting money is about doing something in order for money to flow into your life,

Which is not true But it's the way that we feel it is the emotion that we have and so With this masculine trait that society has put on us It often makes men feel like they have to provide these resources and in order to provide these resources they have to do something which means They don't have to do the love thing.

They don't have to be there and give quality time or attention and nurture They all they have to focus on is the resources Which a lot of times is why they get older and they took their children don't know them or like them or respect them because they never took the time to nurture them and to give them attention and and And to just feel love because love is not the things in love is not the doing so now we know you know Have more do more that ain't love And it and money is not gonna flow to you just because you do do do do do Money is not gonna flow to you just because you bought a house doesn't mean now you deserve another house Because money doesn't understand deserve,

But that's that what you say to yourself like oh,

I deserve these things You don't have to deserve them.

You do not have to deserve them.

You don't have to do anything The only thing you have to do in order to deserve them is to desire them But you do need to make sure that your desire is coming from your authentic self Not your imposter self because the imposter self is is craving Fleeting pleasures where the authentic self only desires True happiness peace joy,

So if it brings you peace and joy and money It is it is you know write an exact and a line and in sync.

That's the word It's in sync with you,

And if it doesn't if it's like that fleeting pleasure you feel guilty later You hurt somebody else to get it then it's not in sync with your and authentic self is in sync with your Imposter self and you don't need to sync with your imposter,

But oftentimes you want to keep up appearances again fake it till you make it But this can cause the bad decision making because you are trying to people please again so that's number two number three is Value is associated with money So this lack baits emotion is you know those people who say like I know my worth I know my value,

And then they throw out a dollar amount,

And you're like hmm I Say you don't know your worth,

And you don't know your value because you just put a dollar amount on it But honey you are priceless,

So don't you let anybody put a dollar amount on you because you are priceless And so when you do value Money over self and you you do equate your your self with a dollar amount then you are devaluing yourself This means you you don't know who you are Truly you're really focusing again on what you have and what you do and all the things outside of you Not who you are on the inside Not that title that doesn't matter you know or even the dollar amount That doesn't matter either and so equating your your value with money a lot of times the money mentality days do this are the Enthusiasts the hero and the blamer now.

I don't get a lot of blamers on these things They don't come to to workshops and lives and stuff like that But if you do know a blamer then they they tend to believe that if people aren't taking care of them if they're like not believing their story and and doing something to make them feel better,

Then maybe they don't love them and Oftentimes and that's not true It's just not true but for a blamer because a blamer likes to be taken care of and Likes to kind of play the victim if people aren't taking care of them,

Then they often feel like they're they're not valued So that's why if you're a hero you tend to attract blamers because heroes Feel like they're valuable when they're useful and when they can do something for somebody And so heroes tend to attract blamers and I work with many heroes Heroes are probably my number one Clients and then enthusiasts number two My number two clients because as you can see I've named Enthusiasts a few times enthusiasts have a lot of money emotions Heroes can be pretty logical when it comes to money,

But in that gifting area They have a lot of emotions around there and this value with money when it comes to a hero It usually is around gifting when it's an enthusiast equating their value with money is usually around Something in business like them having making enough money in their business or having enough Pay a paycheck,

You know to show that they have it But they really like to be able to show their money outward and they don't want it in a 401k they don't want it in the retirement account or in a Bank account they want it on in their driveway.

They want it in the house They want it on their body.

That's how they show their value and so if They don't get the money Then they feel rejected or they feel small and if they ask for money and you say no Then they will feel rejected and then they will treat you differently or they will think you will treat them differently And they're likely to do something For the money and in Chicago We have this little saying that you'll be like you will be willing to do something strange for a little bit of change so this is because The person who values themselves by money Sometimes is willing to lose their values.

They lose a little bit of dignity to get money now this kind of Seeps over into the lust-based emotions,

Which I'll hold off and talk more about that next week But just know that when there's a lot of lack lack lack feelings of lack There's a more higher likelihood that then you can start to seep into lust because you want it so bad And you feel like it's not there and then you keep putting out the feeling of want and what you focus on expand So if need and want if you need and want and you need and want Then you keep putting that out and out rather than being grateful for what you have rather than like,

Oh,

It's so awesome It's so awesome to have this computer even though you want a new computer you like this computer is awesome And I I'll so look forward to the next computer It's gonna be so awesome even more awesome than this one,

And I love having a new computer.

So If you can but if you can first focus on the gratitude you have for what you have then you can create This attraction for the next thing and now the last one is running out This is a lack,

You know lack it's about running out where it's just not Enough resources where you feel like you're running out of money.

You're running out of time.

You're running out of energy maybe if you're older and maybe you haven't Saved for retirement properly it's creating some fear some lack in you and you you maybe you're starting to overwork now or over save or Just have a grim idea of the future Maybe even having sleepless nights because you're not sure what the future holds for you but the thing is that can turn around just like that just like that and That's why the focus has to be on The gratitude you have for the position that you're putting yourself in I'm putting I am in the position To save for my future I'm in the position to save for my future and the more that you give yourself that language The more you'll have it now Let me explain something to you because this is kind of a touchy subject the universe doesn't understand future The universe only understands present.

So when you ask for something in the future Just know that you can be Confusing the universe But I give people that language because it's real and and and and Understandable so Just know you can't stay there Like you'll do that in order to feel the comfort and then once you get it Then you can pull your gratitude into the present And so when I say when I'm giving you an affirmation that allows you to use the word future in it Understand that I only want you to do this for a very short time so you can get out of this Negative money emotion and once you get out of the negative money emotion Then you pull yourself into the present knowing that you are always taking care of this moment in this moment in this moment All the moments because this moment is just past now.

It's this moment up that past to now It's this moment.

You see I'm saying so because time is always moving,

But you're always in this moment This is the only moment you can be grateful for and you will always Have what you need in this moment and really truly in this moment you do So if you can just feel that and tap into that now,

I'm not saying it's easy peasy like just do it This is why we have these live sessions and these recorded meditations So that you can continue to bring yourself back to this moment make sense Good so when you feel like you're running out it tends to put you in emergency mode and when you're in emergency mode You can't feel safe.

You do not feel safe.

And if your brain doesn't feel safe,

You'll lose sleep You'll you'll be snappy.

You'll be Angry,

You'll be grumpy easy to upset and so these lack base emotions Tend to make you a not a nice person So especially this one the fear of running out this lack,

You know think that things are just running out It really does push you into a place that you create little dramas where?

You might get money and then it goes get money and then it goes and the money mentalities that typically experience this are savers blamers and spenders Spenders never feel like it's enough because they always want to spend and that's the only thing they don't they don't exercise the other areas Of the money cycle which the money cycle if you remember is earn grow Protect gift and enjoy your money.

And so a spender is only spending they're not growing.

They're not protecting They're kind of gifting a little bit if but if that's falls into spending if it falls into spending they feel good about gifting And so and enjoying money,

So they might be doing a little bit of enjoying a little bit of gifting But only because that equates with spending for them.

So The spender is is Okay at earning there They're not necessarily that great at earning but they get because of that they get really concerned about money running out And so savers always are concerned about money running out because they're always looking at the future and what we have enough and what we have enough and what we have enough and Not focusing on this moment and oh,

We're good right now.

This is we're good and so That is those are The four most common black based emotions and so my question is What questions do you have?

So you can start to put those in the chat if you are listening to this recording,

Sorry But you can send me a comment and I'll do my best to answer Your questions there,

But I do want you to ask yourself a few questions and that is when When do I have?

This lack Emotion when do I have this lack of motion?

Whichever one it is whether it is,

You know,

Not enough,

You know I'm not good enough.

I don't have enough I need to do more or you know Whatever you're feeling my value is equated to money any of those whichever one it is When are you having it?

Is it around asking for money?

Is it around spending money?

Is what is it when you save money?

Does it have to do with once or does it have to do with needs because some people are okay paying for their needs But then when they skip over into once there they get nervous and they're like,

No can't go to once I can only pay for needs as black.

It's not enough to do the once it's only enough to do the needs and so start to think about when do you have these these emotions and then What would it feel like To not have the emotion,

But let me change my language.

What would it feel like?

To feel something different and if you feel something different,

What would that feeling be?

What would that feeling be?

What would you prefer to feel about money?

When it when it comes to money as it associates to money.

What feeling would you like to have?

And you're gonna go ahead and feel it now because we are about to go into our Meditation and so if you're listening to this recording go ahead and in now and then I'll see you in the meditation