Lesson 4 - Search For Meaning Over Money

In this talk we discuss how FEAR-based Money Emotions block your power and get in the way of your. happiness. I share with you the 4-most common FEAR-Based Money Emotions that block happiness so you can identify them when they show up in your life. In the meditation that accompanies this talk, I give you tools to overcome those fears so you can take control and create a healthy, wealthy, happy life.

Transcript

We're going to talk all about the money emotions.

I'm going to recap a little bit of what we talked about last week or a week before last because we skipped a week.

I'll recap a little bit just to catch us up and then we'll just go from there.

So as you know you can listen to this talk but at the end of this talk after you're done I want you to go over if you're listening to this as a recording and listen to the meditation that goes along with it.

If you're here live I still want you to go back and listen to the meditation a few times because the things that we clear in this session they don't automatically just go away in one meditation and you're doing this so that you can almost like how you take vitamins you If you don't have negative money emotions do this preventively.

If you do already have negative money emotions then do this to release them.

Let them go and do it again and again and again until you're no longer holding on to these negative money emotions.

So let's go to a little bit of a recap and last time we talked about the money mentality types.

If you do not know your money personality or your money type you need to go back and listen to lesson three so that you can get it.

We talked about being a spender,

A saver,

A blamer,

An enthusiast,

A hero,

An artist and the last one which is the one that you really want to strive to be is the president.

We call it the president because that's the name of my company Presidential Lifestyle and the president is the ideal money mentality and the reason it's the ideal money mentality is because it has harmony on all of the areas of the money cycle.

What's the money cycle you might ask?

I define the money cycle as earn,

Grow,

Protect,

Gift and enjoy your money.

I'll repeat that,

Earn,

Grow,

Protect,

Gift and enjoy your money and how you navigate the money cycle is going to determine your lifestyle.

These emotions that we're about to talk about are going to determine how you navigate the money cycle and these emotions are usually given to you by the money mentality type that you become.

How do you become any money mentality type?

It's based on your past experiences and the reason why we need to clear these money emotions is because they are stuck in our brains and even in our bodies because we have tried over and over again to release them but because of negative programming that is passed down from parents,

Society,

Community,

Even ancestral,

We have to let it go because as spiritual beings,

Whatever you believe,

Religious or otherwise,

No matter what you believe,

Spiritually as atoms,

Not even as actual human beings,

Just the energy inside of us is pure but that pure energy gets taken over by each experience and some of these experiences started at age zero like at conception when you were not even given a name yet,

You had some money experiences believe it or not.

You had experience with love,

You had experience with health,

You had experiences and we have to learn to release them and the only way we do that is through meditation,

Hypnotherapy,

Self-sync therapy,

Healing modalities that get down to the root of the problem so we're not no longer just dealing with symptoms.

So these money emotions,

Let's talk about the four categories and then I'll tell you what we're talking about today.

So there are four categories,

There are fear-based emotions,

Lack-based emotions,

Lust-based emotions and lonely-based emotions.

Over the next four weeks,

We're going to talk about all four of those categories but today we are focusing on the fear-based emotions.

Now I like starting with the fear-based emotions because we are born with some innate fears,

We have them.

So you've probably been told or maybe you've heard some saying about like fear is false evidence appearing real.

It's not true.

There are some real fears.

There are some things that you should actually be fearful of and it's healthy and your brain is very aware of these things and it keeps a record of it so that it can keep you alive because that is the brain's job to keep you alive.

So if you're looking for your brain to help you find pleasure,

Wrong organ,

That's not going to happen.

Your brain is not going to help you find that pleasure.

Its job is to keep you alive.

So it holds records of these fears.

The innate fears that we are born with and I know I'm going fast because I have a lot of information for you,

But just remember you can replay this over and over again.

So fears that we are born with are the fear of falling,

The fear of darkness,

Which is the fear of the unknown,

And the fear of loud noises.

Why?

Because the fear of falling,

If you fall off a cliff,

Primitive times,

Remember when we were cavemen and cavewomen,

When we get to the edge,

The brain needed to give us that fear of falling so we wouldn't like jump off and say,

Oh,

Let's go see what's down there.

No,

No,

No,

No,

No.

If you want to see what's down there,

You need to go back the other way and climb down.

So the brain gave you that fear of falling so that you wouldn't jump off that cliff.

The brain also gave you the fear of darkness so that you wouldn't just walk into some dark place and get attacked by something bigger than you,

Which is also the reason why you have the fear of loud noises,

Because something bigger than you made that loud noise.

Something more vicious than you made that loud noise,

A tiger or something,

A lion,

And you need to be aware and you need to get moving.

If you hear that loud noise,

Move.

Get out of there.

Get back to the cave or wherever you live in this primitive time.

So those three fears got,

Let's say exacerbated and they turned into hundreds and thousands of other fears that just stemmed from these three.

Now we have to manage these other thousands of fears because most of them are not real.

Those are the ones that are not real,

But the fear of falling,

The fear of darkness,

The fear of loud noises,

Those equate to other things.

The fear of falling and the fear of darkness and the fear of loud noise represents the unsafe.

When are you not safe?

We are safe when we make sound financial decisions,

When we do our research,

When we're not basing it on what other people are doing but what's right for us.

Then we don't have to be fearful.

These are factual.

We can have factual concerns and we can do our homework to make sure that we are on top of our business,

But when we are using emotions to take the next step or to move through an experience,

That's when the fear is misplaced.

So sometimes this is passed down,

These fears are passed down through society.

You may not even know anybody who this bad thing has happened to,

But because society told you you should be scared,

You were scared.

But it could be that a parent or a grandparent experienced this.

Many of us have grandparents or parents who were in the Great Depression or in the Holocaust or even not grandparents in slavery but great-grandparents that were in slavery and so that scarcity,

That lack created this fear that things aren't safe.

They passed that down to us.

Now some of that is primitive if it's far enough back,

But some of it is actual words and stories that got passed down to us.

Lastly,

We have our community,

People around us,

Friends that we see go through things,

And then our own experiences.

You have your own experiences,

But each of those experiences is usually given to you.

Some of them you create yourself,

But because of society,

Community,

And parents,

You have already had some preconceived notions about how to deal with money.

So let's break down each fear.

I know it took me about 10 minutes to get there,

But I told you it's a lot of information.

So go with me.

This first one is super important.

I'm leaving the biggest and the best for last.

This first one is super important,

And it's the fear of making a mistake.

Fear of making a mistake is when you get that analysis paralysis.

You don't know what to do,

So you do nothing,

But doing nothing is a decision.

So you think that you're stuck and you're not going to make a decision,

But you have made a decision and that decision is not to take control,

Not to take your freedom that you have,

Not to leave or to lose your power.

Many of us are talking about empowerment,

But you don't have to be empowered because you were born with power.

Just like you have innate fears,

You have innate powers,

You just have to use them.

And so that analysis paralysis is still a decision,

But you have to decide if that is the decision you want to make.

So when you don't make a decision,

Decisions get made for you.

And then that still could be a mistake that happens.

Another way of making a mistake or having fear of making a mistake is making a decision and then second guessing that decision.

Just say,

Oh,

I shouldn't have done that.

Should I have done that?

Was that the right decision?

And just never letting it go.

But it's kind of too late.

You already made the decision.

If you need to make another decision,

Trust yourself to make that next decision.

You're smart,

You're capable,

You're powerful.

Remember,

You will make that next decision.

So that second guessing,

Or instead of just second guessing,

You actually switch.

You're like,

You know what?

No,

I'm not going to do that.

I'm doing this.

And that can be pretty painful because maybe the first decision was the right decision,

But because you doubted yourself,

You switched and you moved to a different decision,

Which puts you in a position to not trust yourself for the next decision.

When we are doing the same thing,

Expecting a different result,

Even when we know that result doesn't work,

We've tried it before,

It didn't work,

But we're doing it again because the brain goes towards familiar and away from unfamiliar.

It feels like familiar is safe,

Even though it may not be good for us,

Quote unquote.

When I say good,

That just means the best possible outcome.

The next one is fear of rejection.

Many times we fear asking for money because somebody may tell us no.

This happens a lot when you look at the money mentality types.

This happens a lot for my artists,

My heroes.

Enthusiasts have no problem asking for money.

Blamers have absolutely no problem asking for money.

Spenders,

They like to receive money,

But they don't necessarily like to ask for it.

The fear of rejection is when you think somebody is going to tell you no.

If you own a business,

This can make growing your business pretty tough because you don't want to ask for the money that you are willing to work for.

It's not even that you don't deserve it,

Which just know,

You never have to deserve money.

Money doesn't care if you deserve it or not.

That is not what creates the energetic exchange.

Money just goes where it's welcome or it goes where it's invited,

Basically.

It goes where it's invited and it stays where it's welcomed.

If you don't want to ask your employer,

Let's say,

For a raise or for the right amount of money for that position,

Many times we interview for positions,

They say,

What are your salary requirements?

You're like,

What are you willing to pay me?

Because I'll take it.

You don't want to say,

Because of my expertise,

The amount of money I pay for my degree,

The what I bring to this organization,

How I know I'm going to show up every single day because of who I am as a person,

What I do,

Who I am,

What I do,

What I believe in,

What this job,

I've done my research,

I know what this job pays.

Instead of saying that and coming with confidence,

And this is the number I require,

And knowing that they may reject you,

But most likely they're going to counter you rather than saying,

Oh,

You're out.

Get out of here.

I can't believe you asked for that.

They're going to say,

Hmm,

You're right.

That is probably the right number,

But here's what we're prepared for.

You don't really have to be afraid.

That is the fear of rejection,

Which is also slash the fear of not being accepted.

We don't ask for the money because we don't want the rejection,

Because if we're rejected,

Then we're not accepted,

And to the brain,

To your primitive brain,

If you're not accepted,

You could die because you'd be cast out of the tribe all alone,

Open and vulnerable for those things bigger than you to attack you,

And so that's the fear of rejection.

The next one is the fear of being taken advantage of.

Many of my wealthy clients have this experience.

However,

You don't really have to have a lot to have that fear of being taken advantage of,

And many people,

Especially those who have money,

Don't know who to trust or how to trust,

Especially as they amass more and more.

Sometimes they feel like people are just going to like them for their money,

And they won't know who likes them for them.

They can often keep secrets,

Even from their own spouse,

Which creates financial infidelity,

And that financial infidelity creates divisiveness in the partnership,

But that can even be true in a business relationship as well,

Keeping secrets from business partners or other professionals.

Maybe sometimes you know of many wealthy people have accountants and lawyers and a team of people around them that are going to keep them on track and help them grow their business or their money,

But if you're not being honest,

Then they can only do so much.

Some people have,

As you might have heard before,

Like lawyers watching lawyers or they have an accountant and another accountant,

But this fear creates,

Almost attracts,

The vultures,

The takers into your life,

But if you put systems in place that make sure you're not being taken advantage of,

If you put systems in place,

Checks and balances,

Then you don't have to necessarily worry about that.

Sometimes people even play small,

Call themselves,

I had a client call himself a poor boy from Georgia,

And even though he had millions and millions of dollars and had had millions and millions of dollars for many years,

He considered himself a poor boy from Georgia,

One,

Because that's just the way he saw himself,

Because he didn't grow up with money,

But also two,

Because he didn't want other people to see him as somebody with money.

I often tell the story about a young lady I worked with who,

She had dual goals,

Like opposing goals.

On one hand,

She would dress in the Chanel suits and bags and she'd show up in all the designer diamond earrings and things like that,

But then she said,

Oh,

I don't want people to know I have money,

Because if they know I have money,

They're going to want to take it from me.

She wouldn't invite people to her home,

Because she had a bigger house than a lot of her employees or even friends,

And she thought that maybe they might want to take her money if they find out how much she has.

For that reason,

She had a hard time connecting with people until we did our work together,

And then we cleared that for her.

Now she has clear understanding of what it is to be her with money,

But also how to invite people in and not be taken advantage of.

And then the last one I said,

I left the best for last,

And I talked about this in our opening,

And that is the fear of the unknown.

Now sometimes people say to me,

What about the fear of missing out?

Well,

The fear of missing out is the fear of the unknown.

You are feeling like,

Oh,

I better go because there's probably something there that I'm going to miss out on,

Right?

That is the unknown.

You don't know what is there,

So you choose to go.

So fear of the unknown,

Fear of missing out,

They kind of get grouped together because fear of the unknown is all about either one or two things are going to happen.

There's this thing I don't know about that's going to cause me to lose money,

Or there's this thing that I need to know about.

I need to know about it,

But then I don't even go do the research or close my eyes or bury my head in the sand because maybe it's just too scary and I don't even want to look at it.

And so there's this fear of the unknown.

I tell the story often about a client I worked with.

She got a tax bill from the IRS and she had paid her taxes,

So she thought she paid the right amount,

But she did her own taxes and she's so afraid that she was going to end up owing the IRS thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars.

So in our therapy sessions,

She would just talk about this until one day I said,

You know,

Just bring the letters,

Like just bring them,

Let's open them.

And when we opened those letters,

She was just off by $64,

$64,

She could easily pay that.

I said,

Girl,

Do this right now.

Write this check.

Let's go online.

Get on your phone.

Let me pull out my computer.

Just pay this $64.

It is nothing.

All this time you have been weighing and holding onto this stress for $64,

Something you've had in your bank account for as long as forever,

Like you have this money.

So because of the fear of the unknown,

She never opened the letter.

She didn't know how small her problem was.

She thought it was bigger than it really was.

So that's the fear of the unknown.

And we make things much bigger sometimes than they really are.

And we feel like we won't be able to control them,

Right?

They'll be bigger than us.

But a lot of times we're much bigger than our fears.

We're much bigger than our problems.

We just think the problems are bigger than us.

We just empower the problems rather than using our own problem,

I mean,

Our own power.

We give that power to the problem.

So the problem gets bigger because the more you ignore the problem,

Right,

The fear of making a mistake,

It doesn't just go away.

In fact,

It usually gets bigger.

Those are our four fear-based emotions.

And a lot of times they kind of go together.

You may have the fear of the unknown,

So you don't want to make a mistake,

And feeling like that rejection will be the mistake that you would make,

And then somebody could take advantage of you,

That would be the mistake you made.

And so you're looking at all of these,

They kind of roll together.

So fear of making a mistake,

Fear of rejection,

Fear of getting taken advantage of,

And fear of the unknown are the four most common fear-based emotions,

Negative fear-based emotions,

Money emotions.

So these are the four most common negative money emotions that you will feel,

Or your clients if you do work with clients.

And I like to share this information with healers and practitioners,

Because not only can you use this in your own life,

But you can keep your eyes open for when your clients are going through this,

Because then you can have some compassion for them as well.

So I'm going to pause right here and open up for questions,

Look in the chat,

See what we have,

And then we're going to go into our meditation.

So if you're listening to this recording,

That is your next step.

Go right over to meditation four,

And let's get started clearing your negative money emotions,

Specifically the fear-based ones.