A Podcast: My Awakening Story

Once you "wake up" to what life can be like living a spiritual life, it can be a lonely journey. I wanted to share my personal awakening story so you can see that you will get through this! There can be a magical, joyful journey along the way.

Transcript

Welcome to the Queen of Awakening podcast where you can learn how to leverage your energy for thriving relationships,

Better vitality,

And more prosperity hosted by Jesse Cole.

Welcome to my podcast.

Today is episode 2 and I will be sharing with you my personal awakening story.

It happened for me back in 2008 was where it all began.

I am an avid reader.

I've always just loved the feel of a book in my hand and I was at the library perusing the new book section and I checked out a book about thought forms.

Now ever since I was little I've been a pretty serious melancholy child and it just got worse and worse in high school.

I didn't feel like I fit in very well and I felt sad and like I wasn't getting it.

I had some trauma in high school with my best friend and my boyfriend so I felt pretty sad a lot of the time.

In the new book section there was a book about thought forms and I thought oh that looks interesting and it was summertime and I would go out and lay out in the sunshine and read this book about thought forms and for the first time in my life I started to realize that the thoughts that you think have energy behind them and those thoughts create momentum.

So if you're thinking sad thoughts then further on down the line as the day goes on and on and on and so you're going to be feeling pretty sad.

If you're thinking angry thoughts if you're upset about a situation or a person in your life there's a very good chance that if you keep coming back to that thought over and over you're going to end up angry.

Now you can become addicted to these feelings and my addiction has been sadness so that is something that I'm mindful of whenever I start to feel down and out.

I know that it's time to do a good energy clearing so it's important to realize where your energy patterns lie where your emotion patterns lie but this book about thought forms was very eye-opening for me because I wasn't taught this at home or in school.

I couldn't understand why nobody was taught these things.

So here I was learning about how my thoughts affected my moods and that kind of started to crack the door open for what was to come.

Now in 2009 February 10th of 2009 I was laid off of my job.

I have a biology degree and I was working in a chemistry lab in a metals factory so after the 2008 stock market crash there wasn't a huge demand for metals and I was let go because of that.

So while I was on unemployment my friend talked me into moving to Wisconsin and there was a man here that I was dating and he was kind of emotionally unavailable but I was very head over feet in love with this man so I didn't really want to move but I kind of felt like I didn't have a lot of options here.

I did move back by the way spoiler alert.

So my friends tried to talk me into moving to Wisconsin.

I let this guy know that I'm moving to Wisconsin and my heart's not in it.

My heart is still here and all of a sudden I start smelling lemons in the strangest of places so I use some lavender scented fabuloso to mop my entryway and I walk in the house and it smells like lemon and I said why does it smell like lemon?

We were outside digging in the dirt and the dirt smelled like lemons and I thought this is so weird.

So I texted my friend who had moved to Wisconsin about a year before me and she said it's your guide sending you a sign.

So there is one the first sign that you can look for is olfactory where you smell things.

If you smell a scent from childhood,

If you smell a scent from one of your favorite relatives that is your guides trying to let you know that they're there.

They're watching out for you.

You're on the right path.

So just feel secure in knowing that you are never alone.

There's always some guide looking out for you,

Some angels around watching you,

Trying to help you.

So I moved to Wisconsin and I did not handle the move very well.

I really missed this man and I missed my family as dysfunctional as we are.

It was still my family and I cried and I cried and I cried and my friend said you need to see my Qigong practitioner and I said what's that and she said you'll see.

So I went in and I had a Qigong session.

This is the Chinese version of Reiki.

I'm a Reiki master and essentially it's energy work and this woman was so in tune with the universe and as she was working on me she explained to me that your body is divided down the middle and your left side is your female side,

Your right side is your male side and she got to the male side of my body.

And when she got to my right side she said the world does not care about your anger.

I didn't know how angry I was until right then.

I cried the entire time during that session but I walked out of there and I felt 10 pounds lighter.

I felt like I had just dropped this huge bag of emotional baggage that I'd been carrying around with me.

And that is the second way that your guides can talk to you.

They will lead you in the right direction by giving you gentle nudges.

You will be in the right place at the right time to meet the right person that you need to meet.

And if you're open to it,

It can be pretty life-changing.

So as time goes on,

I open a coffee shop in this really weird chiropractic center.

They used pendulums to diagnose who needed what,

Like what kind of supplements that they needed to prescribe to people and that was where I was introduced to Louise Hay and she writes about how your body is trying to send you messages.

She has a book called You Can Heal Your Life where it talks about how emotions relate to diseases that we have.

And while I was there I overheard the Qigong practitioner talking to one of her friends,

A massage therapist,

And she said,

Well I won't be here much longer.

I think I'm going to set up a space with this other woman that they knew and the massage therapist said I had a dream that we're going to rent this place over on such and such road and we should reach out to this other lady too.

And she said,

Oh yeah that's great.

And I thought,

I don't know what the fuck is going on here but I want in.

I had no idea that you could just dream up answers to your life,

Literally dream up answers.

So that's point number three.

Sometimes your guides will send you messages in dreams.

Sometimes it's kind of cryptic and you have to try and interpret what it means,

How it relates in your life.

There are dream books,

There are websites that you can go to for dream interpretation,

But in the end it's personal to you.

You have to know how it relates to you personally.

So after about nine months my friend ended up starting a relationship with somebody else and needed to move in with him and I packed up and I left Wisconsin and I came back to Indiana.

I got a job in a lab.

I felt so lost because things weren't going the way that I had hoped.

I had a job but I wasn't very fulfilled in it.

And at the pharmaceutical company that I worked for,

The guy that worked on the instrumentation,

His wife was a reiki master and I started going to her for reiki sessions and eventually she started giving out reiki achievements.

So there in Ohio at the pharmaceutical company I worked in,

I became a reiki practitioner.

I became a reiki master pretty quickly because I was hooked and I wanted to know more and I met up with this lovely group of women and we did reiki shares so that I could learn to listen to my guides and learn how to get the energy to just flow and how to trust the messages that I was getting.

After a few years of working in that lab I ended up getting downsized again and I chose to teach yoga full time.

Well you can't really do that.

There's only certain hours of the day that people want to take a yoga class so I had to find something to make it work and I ended up working for a friend.

She had a cleaning business and I cleaned a church which was pretty ironic because while I clean this church I would listen to this course that I had purchased online that was based on the law of one.

I found out years and years later but there were seven soul paths that you could take and this man he had audios recorded and there were songs involved and I would listen to it over and over and I would pray for direction.

I would pray for guidance.

I would pray for people that understood what I was going through and looking back I realized that this was one of many dark nights of the soul.

So that's for during your spiritual awakening you will have times that's been termed the dark night of the soul where you feel so lost so confused where you're not sure that you can go on any longer because things just feel so heavy and nobody understands you and it will pass.

There are other people that have been through it and it will pass and you'll be all the stronger because of it.

I prayed for friends while I was there cleaning the church and I feel so blessed because a lot of my friends had moved away and I felt so alone and I slowly but surely started meeting this wonderful group of women and we support each other and we all bring something different to the table and I ended up meeting a friend of mine who has been my coach my mentor and one of my best friends and she helped me start a YouTube channel.

So that's number five,

Coincidences.

Maybe that's two and five I'm not sure but every now and then you'll meet somebody and then you'll meet somebody else and you'll meet somebody else and you just follow that little trail of coincidences to guide you along your path because it's not about getting into the destination it's about the joyous journey along the way.

But my dear friend helped me start a YouTube channel teaching yoga online and it's just SQL yoga if you google it on YouTube and I have yoga and guided meditations but as I was doing this in the back of my mind the thoughts were there that I wasn't flexible enough,

I wasn't talented enough,

I wasn't good enough.

So that was undermining the success that my YouTube channel could be having.

I wasn't making any money in fact I was losing money on this YouTube channel so alas.

Another dark night of the soul ensued and I had to find a different direction.

Actually first I had to just stop and take some time to reevaluate what I was doing with my life which that can be pretty powerful is just giving yourself some grace and saying this isn't working what can I do to stop and reevaluate and see what my heart really wants because I really really just want to help people.

I want to help people heal I want to help people understand how energy can work for them how they can be in charge of their energy and how emotions relate to energy.

So I launched a podcast.

Now this podcast is to help people understand the importance of emotions and energy and also to learn different modalities that people have used for awakening and how many different careers can be found out there for helping people for helping them to awaken and live their best lives.

Now that I am on this journey of the Queen of Awakening podcast I see repeating numbers quite often and that's number six.

Your guides are letting you know that you're on the right path by showing you repeating numbers 11 11 2 2 2 5 5 5 and it's just a gentle little nudge a little reminder that even if you feel lost even if you feel hopeless they're there they're watching you they're cheering you on and you're doing just fine.

So keep your chin up know that you're being guided know that you are never alone even if you feel lost even if you feel broken something wonderful can be right around the corner.

Now I must admit I have felt pretty lost a good deal of my life even after my awakening journey started I've been like oh for God's sake what now what now but that's okay it's all part of the journey.

I recommend having a meditation practice because Source speaks to you and he's still a small voice so in order to be able to follow your bliss and follow your guidance you need to be able to listen.

Mindfulness is very important be aware of how you are interacting with the world what are you bringing to the table?

How can you respond better?

How are your words affecting others?

Know that you're never alone.

There are a team of guides that are looking out for you you can always reach out to friends colleagues.

There's always somebody there to guide you because this path to awakening it can feel kind of lonely sometimes a lot of times people aren't going to understand you a lot of times your family won't get you a lot of times your significant other won't get you.

I ended up moving back to Indiana and I married that guy that I was so attached to and he's a really great person but he's not woke so sometimes you have that to deal with you see the beauty in life and you see how glorious life can be and the person that you chose to share your life with doesn't understand but it's also important to remember that we are all on our own journey we are all walking each other back to God as Ram Dass says we're not all on the same place on the spiral and that's okay some of us have been here more than others some of us are old souls and us old souls it's our job to be a good example for the younger souls and to answer any questions when they come up and to just try to be an example I know that you are loved that you are love so in conclusion make sure that you're meditating make sure that you are being mindful take care of yourself try to see where people are coming from from their point of view try to put yourself in another person's shoes and practice having empathy and enjoy the process enjoy the journey and if you're feeling stuck or lost it's all right it'll pass you'll be okay thank you so much for joining me today I really appreciate it and I will catch you next week bye

Reviews

Thanks Jessie. 🙏