Each and every one of us probably have a friend or family member who we love and appreciate deep down,
But find it challenging to be in relationship with.
For me,
I have a family member who often says hurtful and nasty things,
But I know that it doesn't come from a bad place.
I know she doesn't intend to hurt,
It's just she is regurgitating the ego's thoughts and voice.
She is not conscious and aware of who she truly is,
So she unconsciously says everything that comes into her mind without considering what she is actually saying and how it will affect someone.
I had a genuine desire to see this family member differently.
I wanted a better relationship,
I wanted to see her goodness and let go of the protective barriers that I had built up as I found myself feeling very closed off,
Feeling angry and really not wanting any interaction with her.
I knew I needed to forgive and see from a higher perspective,
Not from the inner child and victim state of consciousness.
For a while,
I took this personally.
I felt hurt and past experiences from childhood were brought up to my awareness that showed me times when this really hurt me,
Where I felt unworthy,
Not good enough,
Where my dreams were shut down.
From this,
I tended to this inner child consciousness that still existed within me to bring about integration and healing.
I felt the emotions that needed to be felt and tended to myself the way I would a child.
I found myself beginning to see this family member differently.
I felt less reactive and triggered by the comments she would make and by the things she would do.
I actually felt compassion for her as I know what it's like to not feel connected to who I truly am and to be functioning from the ego,
To be so unaware.
I felt this empathy and peace.
This shift in my perception made me feel lighter and at peace,
No longer feeling resistance,
Anger or hurt.
However,
I acknowledge that from my past experiences,
Any time I mentioned my goals or dreams,
They would be shut down and she would plant seeds of doubt in me.
Therefore,
I created a healthy boundary,
Not to shadow out but to listen to my heart's discernment and continue to remain centred and loving towards myself.
So I realised I would no longer discuss my goals or dreams with her.
Because of my own healing work,
I no longer felt that I needed her support or validation or encouragement.
Of course it would be nice to be supported by your family,
But I discovered the inner child within me so desperately wanted that,
But it was no longer necessary for me to get that from her.
Now,
This family member is not someone I desire to talk to or hang out with on a regular basis.
So a phone call once a fortnight is enough,
Maybe seeing each other in person month to month is fine.
I can handle that,
There is still a relationship there and that feels in alignment with me.
I wanted to share this personal story because I know I'm not the only one experiencing this.
And I want to emphasise the importance of taking self responsibility and having self empowerment.
Our outer world is a reflection of our own consciousness and if we choose to focus on the faults of others,
How they hurt us in the past,
What we don't like about them,
Then no doubt we will begin to experience that version of them.
However,
If we choose to see from a higher perspective,
See their goodness,
Understand that they are operating from their own level of consciousness and unhealed trauma,
See that deep down they are an aspect of God,
That they are on this human journey too.
We may intend to see them as their higher self,
Even if they can't see it or embody it for themselves yet.
Then it is likely that we will begin to experience that version of them in our life.
That is how powerful we each are.
So don't wait for a friend or family member to change or be different.
You be the one who changes how you see them.
You be the one who decides to play in a higher frequency realm.
You may find that people start to disappear from your life because they are no longer in resonance with where you are operating from now.
Or you may have a relationship that feels renewed and fulfilling now.
Regardless of the transformation,
Know that it is you who has the power to be conscious of how people may trigger you and take that reflection as a sign to go within and listen and be present and bring about harmony and integration.
There is nothing you must change outside of you in this world.
It is within your own consciousness.
And from there you can speak and take action from a place of self-love,
Self-worth,
From an authentic place that is not held down and feeling heavy and wounded from anything outside of you.
Your power lies within.
You choose to harness any pain or fear and alchemise it into love and joy.
You choose to see from the highest perspective possible in each moment within everyone.
This is the ascension journey that we are all on.
We are raising our vibrational state and expanding our consciousness through our shifts in perception,
Through our higher frequency embodiment.
So if you have a friend or family member that you find triggering or hurtful,
Consider if this is someone that you really need to cut out of your life and remain resentful and hateful towards.
Or can you see the little light within them that may be suffering and unconscious?
You do not need to put up with or tolerate their behaviours,
But what you can do is consider whether there is a higher lens you could see them through,
Or love and compassion that you could send them.
You will know what kind of relationship feels in alignment to continue with moving forward.
But the most important thing is that you feel free,
You are at peace,
You have transcended what held you down and you have claimed the power of your consciousness.
Your ability to heal and integrate and tapped into the loving awareness that you are at your essence.
Much Love.
