Strip The Mask Off Of Your Inner Bully GF Live 8-22-26

Most of us believe that feeling stressed or anxious over any given moment proves that the flow of life has somehow altered its course and now runs against us. Our solution is to gather ourselves, reassert our will, and struggle to get everything moving in the 'right' direction again. But truth reveals otherwise: there are no countercurrents in life that are not part of its natural flow…and that do not borrow their existence from the very current they seem to resist. What has changed is not the direction of life; rather, it is we who have stepped outside its Divine movement and become identified with another kind of movement: the compulsion of an unconscious nature ever being driven on toward what it wants or away from what it fears.

Transcript

The title of the talk is Strip the mask off the invisible inner bully and set yourself free. Strip the mask off the invisible inner bully and set yourself free. I have a quick thought connected to that talk title that I'm going to. . . Go over something with you that is basically the main theme. And then we'll get into the material. I haven't time to prove this to you, In fact, The more I think about my relationship to the world. The less interested I am in proving anything. We're given seeds by what is true and we plant them. Tender them. Or we don't. Every talk that I give has seeds of truth in it. And what you do with them is. So here is a seed of truth. There has never been and never will be a bully that walks this earth. That doesn't live in constant fear. Bullies are bullies because they live in fear and there is no bully apart from a man or a woman. Who is so afraid of something in their own nature and that bullies them, They don't know what to do with the pain except to put it on someone else. So with that thought in mind, I want to read for you the main theme for today's talk and then We'll get on with it. Kate, If you will bring up the main theme, Please. Most of us believe that feeling stressed or anxious over any given moment proves that the flow of life has somehow altered its course and now runs against us. Our solution is to gather ourselves, Reassert our will and struggle to get everything moving in the right direction again. But truth reveals otherwise. There are no countercurrents in life that are not part of its natural flow, And they do not borrow their existence from the very current that they seem to resist. What has changed is not the direction of life. It is we who have stepped outside its divine movement and become identified with another kind of movement. The compulsion of an unconscious nature ever being driven on toward what it wants or away from what it fears. I'll leave it to you to go back or copy that. To consider the content of it so that we can work together from that point, From that theme. To look at what we looked at last weekend and what we're going to look at today and of course tomorrow. So let's look at this. When do you feel stressed or anxious in life? And I'm going to leave most of this rhetorical because I have so much to go through. So you'll forgive me if I state it for you. We get stressed or anxious when it seems that life alters its course. And instead of being able to roll along like we think we are, Suddenly something we run into challenges our assumption that we were in charge and headed toward a contentment soon to become our own. And when these moments happen, Like the main theme points out, Suddenly we have to struggle. Struggle again to try and realign people and conditions and get everything moving in the right direction again. I trust you can see this is true. But I also trust that you can see. As you should and have come to understand in real time. Especially given the lessons that we have been having, What seems to be opposing currents are secretly complimentary. And they serve a greater movement than the sum of the parts. Now what does that mean? See this with me because we have to understand this isn't just a psychological teaching. It would be dead if it was. We're looking at, In essence, At the psychology, The mind of the divine. The way it expresses its laws, And how we can see, As was stated in the Hermetic teachings, As above, So below. You look at any flow of water, You look at the bay or river someplace, You see eddies. You see rapids, Movements, You see obstructions. But can you also see that any such temporary form of turbulence in that movement borrows its existence from the same current that those obstructions and countercurrents seem to resist. I'll say it again. The eddy, The rapids, The obstructions, Any temporary form of turbulence, Every one of them borrows their existence from the same current that that eddy obstruction or countercurrent seems to resist. Can you see that with me? You wouldn't know there was an obstruction, A countercurrent, Unless it were revealed through the greater current of which that counter current is a part. This is so important to understand because we look at life as it's moving, We're moving with it, Guiding it. And then suddenly we lose guidance, We lose track. And now we think it's moving against us. Life cannot move against who you are. It's impossible. Kate, Bring up the first key lesson, Please. Read along with me. Nothing. Nothing lives forever. Nothing real lives outside the flow of life. Except for an imagined self. Whose sense of I consists of insisting that life never deviate from the direction it has imagined will lead it to freedom. Nothing real exists outside the flow of real life. Accept. There's an imagined self. Who derives a specific identity from what? From what it wants downstream? And hopes to obtain so we can be at peace. Or from what it feels is obstructing that which it has imagined, And now it must counter what it sees as something countering the peace that it's imagined. And we must see this because if we can see any of it at all. It begs the question that almost no human being asks, But you are as an aspirant. Asked. To ask it. In these moments, Am I aligned with the movement of life when I'm anxious or stressed or fearful? Am I aligned with the movement of life or am I being driven by a nature trying to use life to complete itself? Or am I being driven by a nature trying to use life to complete itself? Imagine a human being believing that they can use life to give them something that they were given as a creation of the divine, Be at peace, Which is to know something of love, Which is to be fearless, But fearless because of a relationship that we see is true as opposed to full of fear because we keep trying to prove a relationship that we never can. Are you following me? I don't want to move too fast, But I also want to cover all this material so that you and I can have a dialogue at the end. We almost always feel this, In quote, Need. I suppose it's more or less not so much a need as that we feel driven to move toward or away from something that we want or that we fear. It's actually compulsive. And each imagined distant destination of what we desire or what we hope to escape, Each of these destinations promises the end of what? The end of my pain. It promises to fulfill a desire. That feeling of being driven says, Go ahead, Move with me, And we'll get to the end of this nagging uncertainty that goes with you everywhere you go. But we must be wiser than that. This imagined object of desire, Whether it's a time to come or a time we want to get away from, That object of desire can't imagine, Excuse me, Can't exist without someone who first imagines it. There cannot be what you want. Without appearing at the same time, The sense of self that wants it. We believe that first comes the sense of self that knows what it wants. And that's not the truth. An event triggers a disturbance. The disturbance brings up this desire, This agitation, This wish to escape it. And then in that agitation and the desire seemingly there to deliver us from that trouble, That is where this sense of self comes from. So it seems as if destination and desire, Me, Is separate, But the truth is destination and the self that's determined to reach it, They always appear together. This is something you have to see. And this unconscious self doesn't just merely have a destination. It's imagined destination creates and sustains that sense of self, That fearful sense of self, That wanting sense of self that believes its completion is waiting there a little further down the stream of a movement that if it can just get it to go the way it wants to, It will get to where it needs to be to be free. Now the same. Holds true. By the way, When we feel moved in an opposite direction. Feeling driven to escape some condition that's problematic. Anytime we are trying to escape an unwanted condition, It's still a movement of desire. There's the desire that wants, There's the desire that doesn't want. This by the way, Is the two masters that Christ said, You will love one and despise the other. So that we are, Without knowing it, Rushing toward a pleasure? Or away from a pain. And it doesn't matter whether we're rushing to or rushing away from, It is still the unseen drive, The compulsion of an unconscious nature that's at the wheel, That is the will of our life in that moment. So I want to ask you before I tell you a story. And I know most of us aren't aware of this, But I'm asking you to at least become aware of it. Here I am, I'm in my car. I'm going someplace and the next thing I know I'm angry that there's traffic. Or that I've been put on a detour. Or that things just aren't moving the way I keep missing the lights. You fill in the blank. In that moment. Can you see that all of that that that compulsion to get on that that's a form of bully. Something's pushing me. I don't know why I feel bullied, Why I feel like I have to do this and have to say that. But the fact of the matter is those feelings of being driven, They always appear when something seems to interfere with the flow that we've imagined we must have in order to arrive where we want to. Can you see that with me? You ever miss sitting in your own home and feeling, I gotta go, Gotta do, Gotta get? And we're so used to identifying with the desire that says, Go do, Go get, That we believe, Well, Then I'll be free of this pain. Failing to see the pain doesn't appear in us until suddenly there's this psychological bully, A certain form of energy come up and say, You got to go, You got to do, You got to get. Now I can't sit anywhere. I can't be at peace because something else is at the wheel. Something else is the will of my life in that moment. Can you see that before I go on to the story I want to tell you? So this is a bit of a rewrite, In a way, From a book that I wrote. I don't know when. But imagine a young woman, We'll call her Clara. And she pays for an expensive bus tour to take her through some magnificent region where there's great canyons, Wild rivers, Steep cliffs, Forever forests. And she, As you would imagine, Expects to see things that she may never have another chance to see. So she eagerly gets on the bus, Takes her seat amongst 24 other people and sets out on this tour, Wide eyed, Expecting all of this beauty, But maybe half an hour into the drive, Everybody, There's a kind of a jolt in the bus. Nobody, By the way, Notices or looks because they're all looking at their handheld device. Maybe playing some game or reading about where they are instead of seeing where they are. And Clara noticed that this bus driver almost went off the edge of a cliff. God, I hope he's better than that. But a little later, They're going along, She sees the bus driver nodding off. And as he does, The bus drifts halfway across the center line and almost hits another oncoming bus coming in the opposite direction. Now she's starting to pay real attention because she realized maybe there's a problem. And sure enough, She notices the driver lifting up a brown paper bag and drinking from a bottle hidden within it. And it's not Pepsi-Cola. And then hit a river crossing. Through an act of carelessness, He almost floods the bus because he stops midway through to blow his nose. I mean, She can't believe it. She thinks surely the other passengers have to see what's going on. But again, No one does. No one's even noticed. Why? Because they're too busy playing games on their devices, Looking at pictures, Or reading about these canyons and rivers that instead of being present to them, They are simply gathering facts about them to tell their friends later about what they saw that they didn't, I might add. And because they can't see what's going on as they sit there. They are completely passive to a string of possible perils. A string of possible perils. Can you see that? I listed them for you. Which means they can't see what? That what's driving them. Is driving them towards disaster. It doesn't even occur to them. And finally, This young woman, Clara. Has had enough. She gets out of her seat, Walks to the front of the bus and says to the driver, Time for you to give up your seat. Please get out of it. Now the driver looks at her and asks, Well, Why? And she answers, Because I'm taking over the wheel. And I will be doing the driving until we get back home safe and sound. He protests, She resorts. Again, What she wants. Driver gets up, Gives her the seat. And we have a happy ending because. Clara and the people on the bus make it back home. This story, If you can follow it. Is my best. Take on representing our present psychological spiritual state. Our life is being driven by a nature. That we unknowingly in trust with our safety. It nods off all the time in some daydream or imagination. It's intoxicated by these states of anger or ambition. It drinks from regrets and self-importance as if there's no bottom to the bottle. And yet we remain, If you will, Psychologically, Spiritually speaking, We remain seated behind that driving nature. And partially so because we're absorbed in the very distractions. That it's creating that keep us from seeing there's a fundamental problem with someone driving this bus. So the young woman represents not just our awareness at its present level, But it points to a higher possibility as well. And this is an important transition. The story, The woman in it, Clara, As she's sitting there for the first hour or two represents our present level of awareness. Like everybody in the bus, Only difference is she notices things that out of that awareness lead her and take her into a separate action. Unlike anyone else, All the other eyes, The thoughts, The cells in her can do. She sees an intoxicated mechanical nature has been occupying a place of authority in her that it never had a right to possess, That never truly belonged to it. So her action to take over the wheel. And to finish the journey. And this is important. I want to make this distinction. It's not the ordinary ego that has decided once again, The way we always do. Well, This time I'm going to impose stricter controls. I'll be more disciplined. This ability to take over the wheel to replace the driver that is there with her own will at the wheel is born of the fact that something awakened within her. It is the awakening of an intelligence. Within all of us that doesn't just see the danger and the nature responsible for it, But understands in that observation that it must step up and into the place that it had formerly given up without knowing it had done so. Everybody still tracking with me in this story? So the first act. If you will, Of what we might call conscious self-government. Is not deciding more forcefully where we are going, Because that's what we think. Well, I got distracted. I got sidetracked here. And the mind immediately does what? In order to deal with the threat to that sense of self that had imagined that destination as its delivery, Just comes up with a new place, A new idea, A new plan. And suddenly that same will, That same desire, That same sleeping nature is at the wheel again, Drinking from its next dream. So conscious self-government is not that we become more forceful. It begins with seeing what has been driving us. We don't think that we're driven. We don't think that we're driven to want to make an impression. We don't think it's the fact that we are driven to excuse ourselves or justify ourselves that belongs to a fearful nature, Because when we're busy doing it, We are drinking from the bottle of certainty and restoring life the way it's supposed to be. But God willing, And I hope it's true for you, There comes a point. When it's evident that asking an unconscious nature to be more responsible is like asking a squirrel not to store nuts before the winter comes. It says, Oh yeah, I will. I understand. And then it goes, What, Where's the nut? And then it runs off driven as it is because that's its nature. It is this unconscious nature to imagine a time to come, A place where it will find peace. And then because it is imagining a time and place to come, Now it's attached and identified with what it has imagined it needs. And it lives in a forever race, Fearing it won't achieve what it's imagined. Can you see this much before I go on? Because what we're describing here is that this authority. That we have mistakenly, Unconsciously granted this nature, It has to be withdrawn. But here's the key, You can't take it back. There's nothing you can do to make a squirrel stop storing nuts. It's an apt metaphor. It's nuts. Said to his disciples, Blessed are those servants whom the Lord, When he cometh, Shall find watching. Blessed are those servants whom the Lord, When he cometh, Shall find watching. And then just a few later. Verses. He says, He describes the servant who forgets his rightful relationship with the master and begins to eat and drink and to be drunken. So on one hand, Christ is saying that blessed are those meaning whole are those. At peace are those who, When the Lord comes, When the moment of that intersection between what is heaven and earth arrives, That that man or woman is there watching. They understand that nothing that comes from heaven and everything relative to this earth comes in the form of forces that are constantly balancing themselves. Nothing that comes that way is counter to the development of all that interacts with it. But we feel these counter movements. We ascribe qualities to them or people that we blame for the pain that seems to come in those moments as if that's said against me. No, What happens when we feel that way is then we forget our rightful relationship with this flow and we do what? Begin to eat, Drink and be drunken. We turn our lives over to the bus driver who doesn't know what he's doing because there's no one there at the wheel. Still tracking with me, Everybody. I want to keep going. So what happens without knowing it? In one of a thousand different ways. Same bottle, Just different labels. We drink from the bottle of a certain false certainty. We drink from the bottle of false self-certainty that we know what has to happen next. And we become literally drunk on the ideas that these imagined powers, All of which are required in order to put everything back to place, That these powers will finally help us overcome the thoughts and feelings that have been driving us along all this time. So that we're blind to the fact that we're agreeing to be bullied by the empty promise of a nature that's powerless. And to see that begins to change everything. To not see that is to live under the thumb of a psychological, Invisible inner bully that we believe is there to help us break out of whatever the problem is, When the real problem is that we live in a world that it dominates. So if we're all on the same page rolling along because I got a special set of insights and an exercise to help you. What do I want to say? Develop and grow your wish. And work to understand what we've been describing it. What does it mean? When we talk about. The fact that. One way or another we can see that one of these servants this mind, This emotion, This body, That one part of me has taken the wheel. Imagination has taken the wheel because it develops us, It creates a self that says this is what has to be. So our task is to see. This movement before we become slaves. Trapped in that bus before we become a part of its vehicle. In which we are the victim of its nature. Instead of finding a way as we are intended and created to do so. To rise above where it is and how it is. That this inner bully is at work within us. Working us over. So Kate, Let's get into this, Please. This is entitled. And just listen along as best you can. Two ways to recognize an inner bully at work within you. Working you over. Here's the first insight. There's two parts to it. Time. Anytime, All that's on your mind. Is how to get past the pain. Of running into some moment seen as getting in your way. You have lost sight of what is running through you in that moment, Pushing you to get through that moment. Let's look at that. Here I am, I'm gonna go to the market. Next thing I know, I've got my hands gripped on the wheel. I'm anxious. Why? Because, How stupid of me to go out at rush hour. No matter what the excuses for the anxiety, The tension, The key here is to realize that that self and its anxiety, Its tension didn't exist until some condition seemed to create that conflict. When the truth is that conflict was waiting inside of that unconscious nature that was suddenly brought up into the light of awareness because something challenged its assumption that everything needs to get out of its way so it can get to where it needs to, To be happy again. Can you see that? Because if you can, I want to go to part two of this first insight. Kate, When you're ready. Connected to everything we've been looking at. Part two. If real life is a flow, And you and I are in it. Than wherever you are. Is within it. You can't be elsewhere. I'm going to read that again. If real life is a flow and you and I are in it, Then wherever we are is within it. We can't be elsewhere. That familiar painful feeling. That you should be somewhere else. Doing something else proves another nature is doing the driving, That its will is at the wheel. Real life, Real life. Is the revelation of a holy movement, Like I've been describing over the last several talks. Only a divided mind looks for itself outside of itself, Outside of real life. Kate, Let's go to the second insight, Please. I trust you are following me. Anytime. You can't sit still. And quietly watch your own thoughts and feelings. But instead find yourself running with them like a thirst-crazed camel racing to drink from the mirage of a desert oasis. You are being driven. I really like that image. Imagine camel breaks out of a caravan alone. It starts to actually dry up and become so thirsty. It's crazed by its thirst. And it looks across the desert sands and it sees, Ah, An oasis. And it starts running towards that oasis. That's exactly what happens inside of us. When some chaos or conflict produces this feeling like, Oh my God, Where did that peaceful nature, Where did that peace go? And then my mind imagines where it is and how to get there. And I'm like a crazed camel running towards something that doesn't exist because my will in that moment has been handed off to a nature that imagines where it will quench its thirst, But that never can. Why? Because the nature that promises the end of any desire is the same one creating the thirst. For it. The nature that promises the end of any desire. Is the same one creating the thirst of it. The nature that promises to bring an end to any pain is the father of the pain it promises to end. This is this unseen loop where life seems to bring up a pain. The life doesn't bring up a pain. The life brings up the proof of a nature that believes it knows God's plan. And that basically it's, God has agreed with where I want to do what I want to do where I want. And when it runs in it, Boom, I'm off running like a madman. I'm picked up from where I am. And delivered into the hands of something that bullies me, That I believe is actually helping me break free. Kate, Let's bring up part two of insight number two, Please. Read along with me, Connect to what I just talked about. If real life is a flow. And you are at one with it. Than wherever you may be. All you can do is to be where you are. If real life is a flow, And that's what we've been looking at. And that flow includes the obstructions, The countercurrents, The eddies. And we are part of that, Which we know we are, Even though we don't really experience it that way yet. Then wherever you are, Wherever I am in that moment, All we can do is to be where we are. There's nothing outside of the flow, Save for a mind that imagines a destination that will free it from what it says runs counter to its wishes. And that drive to be anywhere other than where I am, That compulsion. And it is a bully. Keep moving. Keep doing, Keep rushing to assure what? That soon you will reach a more desirable destination. And that compulsion is the evidence you're being driven along by an unconscious nature whose will is at the wheel of your life. Only the divided mind. Beats itself up. For not being where it imagines it should be to be at peace. Only a divided mind beats itself up for not being where it imagines it should be in order to be at peace. Are you connecting all of the dots here with me? This isn't intended to give you some new knowledge. It's intended to help you go, Whoa. I can see something I couldn't see before. And if I can see something I couldn't see before, How is it I didn't see it before when my whole life has been the example of this kind of victim nature? That I always think is because something doesn't want me to be happy. Something's running counter to my contentment. It's not fair. So that every last one of those complaints, And they're always coming up. Every last one of those complaints proves that this nature, This compulsive will. Proves that it's right. And all that has to happen now is I just have to right the wrong movement, Right the wrong flow, Get it to go the way I know it should go, And everything will be great again as it was before stuff started interfering with me, With my life. Do you see it? These insights that I've just gone over with you and the lessons, And they are, There's an implication in them. Does not mean that we are meant to become passive. Or refuse to act in any given moment where we suddenly have some form of enhanced awareness. Our hero. As an example, The young woman Clara in our story. What does she do? At some point, It becomes so clear to her, It can't be avoided. Sorry, I love that. Idea. It becomes so clear to me. That I am a. I'm a walking compulsion. I'm always rushing, Anxious. Breaking into conversations with what I know is true, Trying to get people to see how smart I am and how stupid they are. I don't say those words, But I give them ways in which they, If they were more like me, They would be at peace. You fill in the blanks. Clara's actions come out of the shock. Of seeing that she's been in that seat complacent. With the dangers that she had over that short period of time. We're complacent with the fact. That we have become addicted to whatever it is we're addicted to. We're complacent with it. Why? Because to do otherwise means I'm going to have to actually do something than just complain about what I don't like. So at some point she sees this and she gets out of her seat. That'd be a miracle for most of you just to get out of your psychological chair. Thinking about spiritual things, But refusing to step out of that seat in which everything is so not satisfactory, But will be. When what? When the bus finally goes in the direction it's meant to go, Which somehow or other we think we can will the direction of the bus. No, We must be at the wheel. We must be in the proper place, Like I talked about with Krishna and Arjuna in the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna as the charioteer. Arjuna didn't take over the reins. He let Krishna, This higher intelligence, Drive. He just agreed to go through and get out of the seat he was in, Which said, I can't and won't because it's too much, Risking too much. And said, Okay, I understand. So she gets out of her seat, Walks to the bus and takes the driver's seat. And I want to repeat this. If only it were that simple. Here I am, I'm anxious. And I say, Get out of the driver's seat. Like somehow or other, Those words are going to make that nature abdicate. It doesn't work that way. In a manner that is beyond description. In my weakness is thy strength made perfect. It is the light of awareness that empowers me to drop this identification with a consciousness that is completely unaware of itself. There is this great exchange that takes place. It isn't my power. It isn't I who know or who can do the good. Rather than there's something that is awakened finally to see that if I don't take this action, I am going to wind up going off of the cliff again and again and again until the final cliff, Which is when this body yields itself and its mortality. If you haven't assumed some responsibility, Don't think it's going to be any different for you on that other side, If there is the other side you desire, When finally you'll be able to make amends. So her action is born out of seeing. Seeing and then receiving a certain kind of conscious shock. Of realizing her life has been in the hands of a will that is in her own. Being driven as it is through life and bullied, Which is to the point of this talk, Bullied by a divided mind whose insatiable appetite has been impersonating her will. An insatiable appetite that has been impersonating my will. An insatiable appetite to move, Not to stay in the same place. It's painful there. And I believe that that desire to move is my desire. It's not, It's the desire of a nature that can't stand itself and the experience of itself. So it always has to have another distraction. The new action that I've described in these insights. Is to remain consciously present. To any thought or feeling, Any sense of self that is pushing or pulling on you to act. How? Notice the tension. Notice, For instance, I know what you're saying has truth to it. I can't fully agree because that would be too much for me to do. I would like to be at rest, At peace in my own life, At least for 10 minutes. But something comes along and says. Take this turn, Take this thought, Go down this road, Psychologically constantly laying out some kind of path that as I enter into it with the same nature that is promising the end of that path to be freedom, All of a sudden that whole possibility is gone and that temporary identity becomes my own. And then I am caught up in the movement, In the flow of its thoughts, Its reactions. Caught in its flow. I'm going to go into that much more deeply tomorrow. So coming to the end of this material. Awareness does not struggle with the unconscious driver. It doesn't wrestle with it. It doesn't try to take the wheel away by force. It doesn't assert its will over what it imagines the will is of something counter to its wishes. Awareness doesn't have to struggle because it sees the whole movement. And when it sees the whole movement, It can't consent to be carried along by the authority, The false authority that is driving that story along. So, And it's something that is unimaginable to us, Awareness of this whole relationship, Awareness rebalances the sense of self without effort. This is why coming to a stop sometimes has great power to at least help you in that pause. Do what? Withdraw your attention from what you're resisting or desiring so that instead of being in the hands of one part of yourself, Whose hands are on the wheel, Whose will has become your own, Suddenly there is a certain kind of intersection and things can regain a kind of natural balance. And the more natural balance that is regained through this observation, Through awareness, The more evident becomes the imbalance of being in the hands of a nature whose will is ostensibly set against your own. So the next time that you feel life has turned against you. Somebody doesn't look at you right. You don't feel good when you wake up. You look in the mirror and. . . You're shocked. Because who is that? Next time a thought comes along, Oh my God, What has happened? Oh my God. The next time it feels like life has in quotes, Produced a counter punch. You, The task is do not immediately gather yourself the way that we do now, Which is to bring as much desire to the forefront so as to force the direction back in the one we want, The preferential direction. No, The point is to ask inwardly. And you can do it. Awareness itself presents it, But you can ask, What is driving me in this moment? I got up, I got up early, I wanted to sit quietly. The next thing I know I'm eating or that I'm in my car or I'm out trying to figure out what to do with this problem. What's driving me? Whose will is at the wheel? What destination has this nature imagined? And then constrict, Construct, What do they call it when they take somebody? Oh, And then abducts me. To do its bidding. What does that nature fear? That it is so forceful. And keeping me from being aware of its activity. And then watch, That's all. Remain where life has placed you. Which is in that moment, Which is part of the flow. If you do that, You let this pushing and pulling nature reveal itself. Without becoming its instrument. In that awareness, You're no longer a passenger being carried along toward some promised happy ending. That's filled with. Thrills and chills and loss and pain all along the way. Each one of those incidents promising that it'll be the last one because now you've learned, You understand, You haven't learned, You just need to see. And as you do, Along with the story of Clara, Then the rightful owner of your life has awakened. And in its awakening, The false driver is seen and excused. Not by you, But by the light that reveals it for being the false authority that it is. And your life then begins to do what? Begins moving with this. Greater current. With this perfect peace that has never for a single moment. Ceased carrying you and everything in it back home. I think I'll stop there. I will stop there. If you have any comments or questions, We have a few minutes where we can. Work together to understand some of this. If that's your wish, I'm happy to. To abide. Yes, Tony, Home is peace. And to remember as you must that we are never alone. Not home. That's the task. Because to understand that we are never not home means that any time I feel compoled, Compulsion, Any time I feel this, I can go, Well, Wait a minute. Where are you going? What do you want? You know, We never ask of ourselves, What do you want? Because the nature is telling us what it wants. And it brings with it this compulsive fear of consequence if we don't answer it. So awakening is everything. Awareness is the beginning. And it is also the end. Because in that awareness we're made present enough. To this interior bully. And that's what you have to see. You have to actually see that you are being bullied. Before you will agree to Stand up to it. Not hate it. Not resented. Not look at life and say, That condition is causing me to feel this fear. But I will look the bully in the eye. I'll meet it face to face. If I had more time, I'd tell you some stories from my past. That I didn't even realize till I was talking were a front runner of the whole of what I now understand at a different level. We begin physically, Sometimes that's the only way we can begin. Then we must step into it, We must do our work. No, Claudia, I wouldn't even say that. May I see this through you? Then you have the idea that there is some nature there that you can find comfort through looking through its eyes. May I just see. Because if I just see where I am and what I am, It is because of the light of the divine. And you don't need to call on the divine to save you. That's the illusion. Because then that divine becomes a form of fear if it doesn't answer or bitterness or something else. It's impossible for me to convey this without. Causing problems, But maybe that's just in. Inescapable. How do you think God sees this world other than through your eyes? How do you think God is aware of your relationship to everything that is moving in that movement other than through the eyes of this other nature that is not separate from it? Says the same thing, Only we just can't hear because it's an inconvenient truth to realize that the only torment I have is self-produced. And that the freedom I seek from that torment is the compulsion produced by that tormented nature. And the only way I can see that is through a set of eyes that are always here, Always present, But that I have not dared to look at or through for fear of consequence. Now I say, Let me have all the consequences I need so that I can take my place in the authentic contentment that God, That life itself has designed for me.

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