Your mind is a thought machine.
Your emotions are the support system.
They work together to create action and yet no matter what you've thought in the past or even uttered the phrase and thought pattern of it is what it is is both flat wrong and oddly true all at the same time.
It is what it is Discounts the fact that your brain is not preset upon your birth and arrival and It discounts the fact that every time you do something new your brain shifts and changes It's when we witness these changes that our biggest gains are created Before we dive into the question that inspired this mindset reset I must use the power of celebration and say thank you This conversation marks the 200th episode here on the podcast I can't thank you enough for listening and being a valuable part of this community It means literally the world to me that you've taken time to listen To send questions in,
To review,
To share,
To really engage with me This has always been meant to be an intentional movement of teaching Both for you and me and I know I have benefited so much from it so thank you,
And I just want to say there's so much more to come and You know,
Let's move forward together.
So thank you now Let's get to the question Bonnie from Seattle,
Washington wrote in and said Danielle I'm hoping you can help me.
My partner and I have been having conversations about not being where we want to be just yet Yet he has a different mindset than I do He's much more relaxed where I'm much more focused on getting to the next level.
He says I'm missing the journey I say that's cliche.
Is it really that important to celebrate the small stuff?
I know you talk about things like presence,
Intentionality,
And mindfulness,
But does all of that stuff really make a difference?
I'm probably asking you to convince me,
But I feel like he's wrong and I'm right.
Is that bad?
Bonnie great question and I hate to tell you this but He's right.
Let's talk about why he's right though before you stop listening and Let's open our mind to celebrating the small stuff because no matter how small a celebration is it still has major impact.
The truth is your brain loves Rewards.
It's wired for reward and yet it also has a default that's built in to remember More negatives than positives.
It's called a negativity bias Why do we have this?
To help us remain safe in all situations With both reward system that needs to be activated and a negative bias Remembering the positive takes,
You know some extra effort You know,
It's back to that saying it is what it is see what I'm saying both positive and negative When you do something big or small and you celebrate the hell out of it The brain literally eats it up.
It fires off good-feeling chemicals like dopamine serotonin and oxytocin even endorphins It's like an explosion of happiness that we feel and all of that Happens when we are in the moment of sensing our good work where we are You know all of the good things that are happening those victories and when that happens When we have all of those chemicals pulsing through us It lowers damaging cortisol levels and calms the amygdala of the brain as I just mentioned a few Seconds ago the act of safety.
Let me say again that the brain's number one job is to keep you safe It does this through seeking connection with and to others to moments to emotions and in doing so it avoids Rejection.
It's looking for a threat and if it can get into a space that it knows that it's safe it Evaluates and elevates the good.
So when we celebrate we reinforce safety and we provide the brain That there's good feeling for us and that's good for the entire self So let's talk about how this impacts us or more so why Bonnie's boyfriend is right Sorry,
Bonnie.
All right.
I mentioned three chemicals just a second ago dopamine serotonin and oxytocin Dopamine gets fired through the body or triggered in the body when there is a reward sensation Say you check something off your list or you have a positive conversation with someone else The brain is triggered to give you that hit of dopamine This accompanies feelings of accomplishment and positivity and keeps you wanting to push forward So that motivation that push is why we celebrate the end result of motivation is why we celebrate Without getting too scientific the benefit of dopamine is that it communicates with various areas of the prefrontal cortex That's our consciousness our thinking brain the part that makes us human The part that allows us to choose words and actions and think about our thoughts So when it's released it allows us to pay attention to important tasks and helps us access our working memory During problem-solving all of that helps us calm that negativity bias Increase our evidence of capability and elevate the good in our lives Pretty good,
Right?
Pretty good reason why we have to celebrate now.
Let's talk about that second chemical release during celebration Oxytocin you may have heard it called the bonding hormone or the cuddle hormone or the love drug,
Right?
Those are popular names for it.
It gives us this sense of closeness of intimacy of well-being and Safety,
What's the brains number one job?
Safety,
Right?
It's released when we engage in physical contact or emotional connection That's healthy it can be really simple like eye contact or a Flash of a genuine smile or giving a high-five or a shared feeling of pride and delight It doesn't even have to belong to you We're going to talk about that in just a second But this will encourage you to experiment to take risk and to take on new challenges This is the evidence of safety and it's another reason why we celebrate big and small Those feelings boost our serotonin levels which supports and helps us change our mindset again back to Motivation back to innovation to creativity to helping with our focus to reducing stress It's like words of encouragement to the brain Descriptive positive feedback.
That's a hell.
Yes Right,
We all need that we all want it we can all create it.
So here is the brain hack Here's the mindset reset part.
You can celebrate others and get the same impact in the brain You can celebrate someone else's success Same impact you can celebrate something so minute that otherwise would not be Something that you would celebrate and still get the same Impact the brain does not know the difference between self celebration or big or small or Celebrating someone else.
It only knows the experience It's having and it produces a chemical reaction to match the level of intensity that you're feeling Isn't that beautiful?
Isn't that cool to know that you don't have to go around try to you know Hit big goals every single minute to get this chemical release It could be something really really small It's so great that you know that you now have the power to create this in your life Let me give you a quick example of how I do this for myself One I celebrate the hell out of all the victories of any person that I'm working with or my family members my friends My children myself,
But I also do this with strangers When I'm in a crowd or say I'm you know in a restaurant or anywhere people are I make it a point To find people who are living in the moment It's maybe somebody who's laughing or a gentle touch across the table or a mom and child Enjoying each other playing.
It's the old married couple that you can tell that there's just really deep love between them I take it in I pause in it.
I offer gratitude and Celebrate what I'm witnessing in the moment guess who gets a benefit from that Me not them They don't even know that I'm using their moment to brain hack my best feelings and you can do that,
Too It's really connecting to the moment getting very intentional and celebrating what you see I really encourage you to give that a try of course Bonnie's question is much deeper than that her question Comes down to celebrating the small stuff along the way to an end goal.
Is it necessary?
But you know knowing how you are impacted by celebrating the simplest things Do you really need to be encouraged to celebrate milestones?
Do you need to be prompted to stop and find gratitude and celebration over the things you're aiming for?
Wouldn't those stops and celebrations be the evidence of I can I am I will I have I conquered Look at it this way every celebration increases resiliency Every celebration gives you confidence every celebration sparks creativity It helps you take risk your brain is benefited Your goal is to move forward your life finds a newness in this creation You are benefited through and in the small moments.
So let me ask you.
What are you celebrating?
Bonnie thank you for the question Sorry for not,
You know saying that you were right,
But the truth is we can all be right in small celebration I hope you will take this mindset reset and shift your thinking and your actions as I hope that you will all do the same Celebrate the hell out of yourself and your life celebrate life itself It changes Everything you are not preset every time something good happens every time something bad happens every time anything happens your brain changes Don't you want to change it for the good?
I?
Encourage you to do so Thank you for taking the time to listen to this episode which originally aired on the get your life together girl podcast Please take the time to review this conversation and follow me here on insight timer for more courses Meditations and additional conversations until next time be kind to yourself and others
