Are you ready to meditate with Kari?
Make sure that you're lying down and you're comfortable and you have everything that you need.
The light is just right.
Your room is just right.
Your PJs are comfortable.
You're ready to snuggle and relax and listen to a story.
This story is about a story.
A story about two little children,
Aiden and Dana.
Aiden and Dana were six and they were quite silly little six year olds.
They were absolutely awesome and they liked to listen to stories.
On this particular night their mummy sat down in bed and told them the funniest story.
First of all she had to make sure that everything was just right.
They were comfortable.
They had comfortable pajamas on.
They'd been to the potty.
They brushed their teeth.
They got the snuggly teddies.
Everything was good to go.
They were laid still and quiet.
The mummy started to tell them the story.
Once upon a time,
She said,
There was a very special place in a far away land.
A place that was called Toot Valley.
Both Aiden and Dana started laughing instantly.
Toot Valley?
Said Aiden.
Yes,
Said mum.
Toot Valley.
Now,
Toot Valley was a very special place because everything that you ate in Toot Valley made you have a certain type of toot.
The kids once again started giggling and laughing.
Let me explain.
One day on a very nice special day,
Two little children.
One of them was a little boy called Aiden and the other one was a little girl called Dana.
They found themselves walking down a path in the middle of Toot Valley.
Toot Valley was a very pretty place.
The trees were full of fruit and the paths were very nice and soft underneath your feet.
Everything was green and blue and there were lots of flowers and nice smells.
It was like everything around them was very bright and lively and fun looking there at Toot Valley.
The first thing that they came across was a patch of land that had asparagus growing in it.
Both Aiden and Dana decided to taste the asparagus.
They both were chomping on the vegetable bite by bite.
It was very very sweet and fresh and crispy and it tasted delicious.
All of a sudden Aiden said,
For some reason I feel very smart.
Dana said,
Me too.
One plus one is two.
Red and yellow make orange,
Said Aiden.
They both started spilling out all of these smart comments.
Very smart comments for six year olds.
And then both of them started to get rumbly,
Tumbling,
Tummy aches.
And then both of them did this very funny sounding toot.
Both at the same time and the toot was like a smart toot.
It sounded like whoop.
It was a very interesting toot sound and as it made it sound they both blurted out another smart comment.
Two plus two is four.
Red and blue make purple.
They both instantly cracked out laughing and started rolling around on the ground.
Asparagus makes you have smart toots,
Said Aiden.
How funny,
Said Dana.
The mom carried on with the story.
The next thing that Aiden and Dana came across was a pool full of jello.
Bright red wiggly strawberry jello.
Aiden said,
Ooh that looks delicious.
Dana said,
Let's eat it.
I wonder what kind of toots this food makes.
They both ate the jello bite after bite after bite till their tummies were really full and wiggly and jiggly because of the jello.
And then they got rumbly and then they both did this funniest toots that sounded like kind of toots.
They were silly toots.
Aiden and Dana started laughing and rolling around on the floor.
Jello makes you have silly sounding toots.
They both carried on tooting and laughing.
It was so funny.
The kids were listening to their mom telling the story and they were laughing in bed.
It was a very funny story this evening.
Their mommy was doing such a good job.
Then she said,
The next thing that Aiden and Dana found in Toot Valley,
The place where everything you eat makes you have different kinds of toots,
Was eggs.
Now Dana and Aiden both ate one egg each.
It was a hard boiled egg and hard boiled eggs are kind of smelly anyway.
But when you eat them,
Sometimes then they can give you egg smelling toots.
Well these toots when they came out were like this.
Kind of toots and they were sorry toots.
And as they came out they were going,
Sorry,
Sorry was smelly,
Sorry.
The kids thought this was absolutely hilarious.
Toots that are sorry that they smell?
Said Dana.
How funny is that?
The kids carried on walking to the next thing that they found in Toot Valley.
The next thing that they found in Toot Valley were jalapeno peppers.
Spicy jalapeno peppers.
Both of the kids didn't really want to eat them because they were so spicy and so hot.
They were scared but they were brave and they had the tiniest little bite,
Both of them,
Of an jalapeno pepper.
Then the tummies started to get hot and they started to rumble.
Then all of a sudden both of them had scared toots.
Scared toots that sounded like this.
The toots were scared because they were so hot.
They were hot scary toots.
Dana and Aiden were both laughing at their mum telling the story and their mum even thought that that one was funny.
Scary spicy toots.
Okay both Aiden and Dana carried on walking through Toot Valley said their mummy.
She carried on with the story.
This time they came to chocolate chip cookie trees.
Every single tree was chock-a-block full of chocolate chip cookies.
Double chocolate chip cookies,
White chocolate chip cookies,
Chocolate chip cookies with nuts on,
All different types of chocolate chip cookies.
Now,
Said the mummy,
When the children ate these cookies they had friendly toots.
They came out saying hello,
Hello,
Hello,
Hello.
They sounded like someone was saying hello.
They were so friendly.
Chocolate chip cookies,
Especially chocolate chip cookies can make you have friendly toots.
Finally,
Towards the end of the path,
The children found an onion patch.
A patch of grass where there were onions growing all over it.
Ooh onions they thought.
Sometimes they're a little bit strong and they don't taste very nice on their own.
But I wonder what kind of toots onions give you,
Said Dana.
Let's try it,
Said Aiden.
Both of them bit into an onion.
It was very strong and smelly.
They chomped and chomped and chomped and then the onion settled in the tummy and then the tummy started to rumble and then before you know it they both did a toot.
It was an angry toot.
Angry bossy toots.
When you eat onions you get angry bossy toots.
Those kind of toots that are really loud and bossy.
The kids once again started laughing so much.
Their mum said,
Who knew that Toot Valley would have so many different foods that give you so many different toots.
You can get friendly toots,
You can get smart toots,
Silly toots,
Toots that are sorry that they're smelly.
You can get angry bossy toots when you eat onions.
Toot Valley was an absolutely crazy place but both Aiden and Dana thought it was the bestest place in the world.
It was even better than Disney.
Toot Valley was so much fun.
The mummy said,
The end.
The kids were rolling around on their bed laughing,
Squeezing their teddies.
They said that that was the bestest story ever mummy.
The mummy said,
Okay it's time to relax now.
Time for you to go to sleep.
Time to let go of your day.
Close your eyes and snuggle down into the covers.
Both of the children did exactly what mum said.
They got all comfy and snuggly in their beds.
Allow your bodies to get relaxed and warm.
You're safe.
Everything is good in the world.
Mummy loves you very much.
Now let's see who can go to sleep the fastest.
Who can stay still the longest and who can be the quietest.
Both Dana and Aiden did exactly what the mummy said.
They stayed really really still and very very quiet and it didn't take long at all before both of them were fast asleep dreaming about all the funny things that they could eat in Toot Valley.
Bestest place to go.
Even better than Disneyland.
The end.
