Life Loves You | 1 Of 2

Feeling stuck or limited by life circumstances? Light a candle, grab your journal, and press play.

In this recording, Rachael shares some thoughts, tips, and journal prompts to help you shift your mindset and remember that you are in control.

You'll consider the gifts in your struggles, the desires of your soul, and steps to regaining positive momentum in your life.

Note that this audio has been divided for easy consumption, so make sure you listen to part 2.

Transcript

My message for you today is that life loves you.

This is for anyone who is currently feeling stuck or limited,

Held back or disadvantaged in some way due to life circumstances.

So maybe you're feeling capped in terms of finances,

Friendships,

Fun,

Freedom,

Health,

Romantic life,

Your working life.

Maybe you're feeling limited by genetics,

By your family background,

By a health condition,

By past decisions that you've made,

By your work history or even by certain personality traits.

And if you are feeling limited you might also have a thought like life is unfair,

I've been dealt a bad hand.

And you might be wishing so hard for things to be different yet feeling that it's impossible for things to be different.

Because the desired state might just feel completely out of reach for quote unquote someone like me.

And where does that leave us?

It leaves us feeling resentful,

Maybe giving up,

Feeling like what you actually want is for some reason not meant for you.

When we enter this state we might just try and get on with life,

You know just accepting things as they are.

But then suddenly the frustration,

The loneliness,

The displeasure returns and you see that yeah you still very much want things to be different.

But then the question is what do you do when there are all these barriers in the way that are pointing to your inability to have things be different in your life.

So in an effort to sort of help us answer that question and shift our mindset I've got some tips and some questions and some thoughts that I want to share with you today.

So the first thing I want to invite you to do is to allow the desire for change to be here.

There's no need to push your desires away,

There's also no need to cling to them,

To become so attached to them that you can't possibly be happy if things are not as you wish them to be.

So there's kind of a middle ground where we're just kind of letting our desires be here but we're also not creating resistance around that desire.

So just see if you can do that for a moment.

And the second is I'm going to invite you to just open up to the possibility that the feeling of stuckness,

The feeling that everything is just hard and that life is against you is just a story.

So this viewpoint is really just one way of viewing things.

It's just the way that things may seem when you look at your life,

At yourself through a certain way.

So for a moment I just want you to sit with that.

This is a story that I am making up.

This is just one way of viewing things.

And as you do that,

Notice how you feel in your mind,

In your heart.

So when you consider that this story of everything being hard and you being stuck and everything being against you,

When you consider that that is a story that you are making up,

Is there a shift?

Is there a shift in how you feel?

Or maybe there's some resistance.

And if there is resistance,

That's okay.

Life is challenging and sometimes there are a lot of things going on within us and around us that appear to be wrong.

But if you notice that there is this resistance,

This resistance to shift your perspective,

See if you can ask yourself,

How is this belief affecting me?

By the way pause the audio if you need time to think because I've got a couple more questions.

So the first is how is this belief affecting me?

The second is how is this belief benefiting me?

So when I say belief,

It's beliefs like I'm stuck,

Life is hard,

Life is unfair,

I don't have X,

Y and Z.

X,

Y and Z is impossible for me.

So those kind of beliefs and stories.

And then also considering how is it harming me?

How are these beliefs harming me?

So maybe by kind of considering the effects,

The consequences,

The impact of a certain way of viewing things,

Maybe you can see that even if there is some resistance to changing,

Maybe it feels quite difficult to change your perspective.

But if you can see that actually this perspective is creating challenges,

Is creating stress,

Then maybe that's a motivation for you to start to open up and see is there a different way of looking at things that actually doesn't create stress,

That reduces the load on my mind and on my heart?

So this is something that I've struggled with a lot and I could just be out a list of things that were getting in my way,

A list of things that I didn't have,

A list of attributes that weren't up to the mark and frankly I was quite obsessed when I was,

I don't know,

In my early 20s,

I was obsessed with all that was wrong.

There was just a lot of stuff that made me feel very trapped in my own self and I didn't realise at the time but the act of holding to these ideas,

These stories of repeating over and over in my mind and kind of almost getting some sort of sick gratification from being angry and sort of feeling like a victim.

By holding to these stories I was actually just making it,

Which is the story that life sucks or that I suck,

I was just making that concrete,

It was becoming more of a thing because I was speaking about it and feeling it and thinking about it and acting on these ideas.

So I want to help you get out of this state if you're in it because I know it's not fun,

I know it's not productive and it's not going to carry you forward toward what you want in life and frankly life is short and you deserve to live the life that you want and I believe that starts with dropping the storyline if you notice that it is prevalent in your mind,

In your narrative.

And the reason why I made this audio is because I believe,

I believe with every fibre of my being that life is for you,

Life isn't against you,

Life is on your side,

No matter how many things that seem to say the opposite,

Life is on your side and the funny thing is that when we embody this truth,

Not only believe it,

Not only think about it but we actually act from a place of this being true,

A lot changes for the better.

The way we feel,

The way we think,

The way we perceive situations,

The actions that we take and as a result of all of that our reality changes.

Now as I said I know that life can contain a lot of shit,

I know that life can contain a lot of difficulty that can't be refuted.

However we are not meant to get stuck in the broken record of what's wrong with our lives or what's wrong with us or what we perceive to be wrong.

We're not meant to get stuck in this,

What I call the loop of doom,

Where we're just thinking of thoughts and creating a reality that matches and it's not good because bigger things are actually meant for us.

So I've got a few thoughts,

A few things that may help shift your mindset and have you feeling more hopeful and seeing the truth and the first is that problems are not solidly bad.

So often when things are not going well in a certain area of our life we hyper focus on what's wrong naturally.

But in fact,

Well one or two things,

So one there's positive elements to everything,

So there's good and bad and that just exists in life,

Good and bad sides to everything and we hyper focus on what's bad,

That doesn't mean that the good doesn't exist,

It's just a matter of our attention.

And also everything that we've lived through up to now has shaped us,

Has given us a unique set of skills,

Lessons,

Viewpoints,

Ideas and other gifts and they come disguised as challenges,

As problems,

As struggles,

As pains but it remains that they help to shape us.

They give us things that if we weren't to have gone through that experience,

If we weren't to have had this problem,

If we didn't have that experience we wouldn't have acquired those things and sometimes it can feel like I'll take the easy life thank you and I'll just be without those skills but I feel like when we look back on our lives,

The more distance I guess that we have between the problem,

The more time has elapsed and we start to see those gifts become more,

They glow more,

Whereas obviously when we're in the thick of it,

It feels like no I'll just take the easy route please.

So a few questions and again as I said just pause the audio if you need to kind of have a think,

I do recommend you get a journal out and take some notes and yeah just kind of do some journaling around these questions.

And the first one is,

It's more of a thing to ponder and that is how would it feel to know that your quote unquote problems were not actually problems,

Concrete,

Solidly bad things but in fact they were little steps to your growth,

To your expansion,

To your goals even.

How would that feel?

How would you feel about the problem?

What would you do with your thoughts and your words and your attention around it if you knew that this was the step you needed to grow,

To expand,

To get closer to what you want?

And next I want you to ponder,

To reflect on what is something in the past that was challenging,

That felt painful but that you survived it.

So something in the past that was challenging,

So it could be quite a long while ago,

It could be the recent past like last week,

Something that felt painful but you're on the other side of it.

So try to think of something that's sort of moderately painful,

Irritating,

Whatever and perhaps not something maybe as extreme as the loss of a loved one because that might be a jump for you to start thinking about benefits.

So the next question once you've got your challenging thing is,

Now as you look back,

How did you benefit from this thing?

For example,

What do you know now that you didn't know before?

In what ways are you stronger,

Clearer,

Wiser as a result of this experience?

And then I want you to consider,

How do you feel about the event now compared to when you were in the thick of it?

So as you look back,

What do you feel about it?

So I'm guessing your perception has changed even if it's,

You know,

It may not have gone from negative to positive but perhaps the degree of negativity that you had around it has changed and a shift in perception like that on something that has occurred can change a whole lot.

So Viktor Frankel who is a Holocaust survivor,

He spent many years in concentration camps and he wrote a book called Man's Search for Meaning.

He talks a lot about finding meaning in suffering.

So here's a quote from his book.

In the final analysis it becomes clear that the sort of person the prisoner became was the result of an inner decision and not the result of camp influences alone.

Fundamentally,

Therefore,

Any man can,

Even under such circumstances,

Decide what shall become of him,

Mentally and spiritually.

He may retain his human dignity even in a concentration camp.

Dostoevsky said once,

There is only one thing that I dread,

Not to be worthy of my sufferings.

Those martyrs whose behaviour in camp,

Whose suffering and death bore witness to the fact that the last inner freedom cannot be lost,

It can be said that they were worthy of their sufferings.

The way they bore their suffering was a genuine inner achievement.

It is this spiritual freedom which cannot be taken away.

That makes life meaningful and purposeful.

Everywhere man is confronted with fate,

With the chance of achieving something through his own suffering.

So it's often not what happened to us,

But how we respond to those events that change our lives for the better or the worse.

So this is where we have power.

Sometimes it may not always feel like that in the moment,

But that ability to choose how we respond is the magic really that allows us to transmute something that feels bad into something that feels amazing and liberating.

So my next point is about shifting our focus,

Shifting our attention to possibilities rather than what is not good here and now.

So as I said before,

It can be,

You know,

It's true that painful things do happen,

Challenges do exist,

But we're not meant to keep playing that broken record over and over again.

In fact we want to select another record altogether if the one that we're listening to is not,

You know,

Is not enjoyable.

So more questions for you,

Again pause if you need to to write down your answer or to think about it.

And the first question is,

If there are no limitations,

What would you ask for?

So we're shifting from a state where we feel stuck in some area of our life and we are shifting to what do I actually want?

So if there are no limitations,

What would you ask for?

And the second question is of that,

Of what you want essentially,

What does your soul truly want?

Now this is kind of an optional question,

But I put it in because sometimes we think we want something on the surface,

It's this kind of superficial thing that we think if we had it we would be happy and actually what we want is the thing at the soul level that this surface thing represents.

So for example if I,

If someone said okay what I really want is a lottery win,

I want to win like 10 million or something in the lottery.

So that could be the surface desire that they have,

That they feel that they want,

But maybe at the soul level what they really want is freedom.

Or for example you might think I want to write a book,

I want to write a best selling book.

And at the soul level what you want to do is create.

Another example is maybe you know if you're self employed you might say I want more clients.

And at the soul level what you really want is financial abundance.

So again there's this difference between what we think we want or what we think we have to have in order to actually have,

Sorry in order to have what we actually want.

And I think that distinction can be valuable because what it does is it opens up more possibilities.

So for example if I put all my energy into winning the lottery,

When actually I want is freedom,

And I'm missing out on all the potential things that could give me freedom that aren't to do with winning the lottery.

Or if I think that I want to write a book but really my soul just wants to create,

And maybe it wants to create in a different way but for some reason I've just ingested this idea that I want to write a book.

But maybe for some reason it's not actually meant for me,

Then I may be blocking other things that I could create because I'm just solely focused on I must write a book.

So I feel like if we kind of take this soul level concept around what we want then we have that opportunity to just kind of float and just let the desire manifest in whatever way it's meant to.

So if that resonates with you then great,

If it doesn't then don't worry about it.

The crux of this section of today's chat is just being clear on what you want.

So once you have that clear,

What you want,

Or what your soul wants,

Now I want you to consider what are your options when it comes to bringing that into your reality.

So this is kind of a little brainstorm of what's possible.

So just not living from this place of like what's logical and you know what I'm experienced in or what my CV or resume says that I can have or do,

Just brainstorming what is possible in this universe,

In this earth that we live in that could come to form that would allow me to obtain that soul desire that I have.

And considering for example what's in your sphere of control,

So there's a lot we can focus on,

Oh I can't do that and I can't do that and I can't do that,

But what is within your sphere of controlling and capability that would be stepping stones to what you want.

So just let your pen just go crazy,

And hold back just brainstorming ideas even if they seem a bit wild.

What are your options?

And now the next question is what inner strengths do you possess that could help you to take steps towards one of these options let's say.

So as you think of inner strengths I want you to think about the lessons that you've learnt and the challenges that you've overcome.

So that's what inner strengths do you possess that could help you take steps towards your dream that can take you forward towards what you want.

Next question is what could be one step,

So one step that you could feasibly take this week or maybe even today.

So for example let's say I have a dream of being free,

Having freedom in my life and maybe I've brainstormed that for example having a chat to my manager at work let's say about reducing my working hours or maybe looking for a part time job or maybe just what I want to do one step would be looking at my accounts and having a look at my expenses and just seeing what are the monthly subscriptions,

How much am I spending and what of that do I actually not need to be spending money on and that I could then save or use for a holiday or something to have me feeling more free.

So we're thinking of one step,

One tiny step.

The next question is if you believed that life was on your side,

Matching your efforts with new ideas and opportunities how would you feel?

So this is more of an imagine although you can journal on this as well.

So if you believed that life was on your side,

Matching your efforts with new ideas and opportunities that help you move forward towards what you want how would you feel right now?

How would you live?

What barriers would you be able to overcome?

So well done for getting this far,

I'm going to leave it there for today but join me for part 2.