The Cure For The Pain Is In The Pain, Rumi Says Wisely

I love this quote by Rumi (in fact, I love everything Rumi says). Whenever a guru tells us to lean into the pain or suffering, this is what they mean. There is a lesson in the pain or suffering that is waiting for us, but most of us tend to ignore the pain, and therefore miss the lesson.

Photo by Dingzeyu Li on Unsplash

Transcript

Hey everyone!

I hope that you're doing amazing wherever you are in the world.

My name is Boomshakha and I welcome you to my channel.

As always,

I'm so grateful that you're listening,

Subscribing and commenting.

I really appreciate the support.

In this one,

I wanted to speak to you guys about a quote from Rumi.

Now you guys probably know,

If you know me at all,

Or if you've been listening to my videos,

That I love Rumi.

I love him so much.

He is one of the best poets in the world.

Him and Maria Rainerlk,

Or Rick,

The German poet.

I love both of them.

They're two of my favorites out of all of the ones that I've read.

One of the quotes that I read recently,

Shared by a friend of mine,

Was something like,

The cure for the pain is in the pain itself.

Literally,

I read this quote and you know how it is.

You sometimes read something and it's as if your eyes kind of pop out and your brain kind of just lights up and it's like,

Whoo,

The angel starts singing.

It was basically like that for me because I'm sitting there thinking,

As I said,

I've been talking a lot about shadow work,

A lot of psychosomatic work and things like that,

But a lot of shadow work is about the pain.

It's about focusing on the pain,

About going into the pain,

Going deeper into the pain,

Leaning into the pain and not running away from it,

Which is the basic essence of,

I think,

All healing.

Because what happens is that until we are able to lean into the pain or lean into our experiences or lean into all that stuff,

What happens is that we run away from it and we're not able to really experience it.

We don't actually really know what's going on,

What's the essence of it,

Where it goes,

Where it's coming from,

Why is it happening,

Why does it happen,

When does it happen,

All that stuff.

I'll give you a quick example from my own life,

Obviously,

Because I like to do that.

I've been noticing recently as I've been at home that,

As my parents are with me all the time,

My sisters with me all the time,

Quarantine life,

I love it,

I'm at home,

And I get to really spend time with my family in a way that I haven't spent before,

Really.

It's kind of interesting.

And I've noticed something that's been coming up for me a lot,

And I've actually been messaging my friends about it because I was like,

What am I doing wrong?

Why am I feeling this way?

And I'm very similar,

Extremely similar.

My mom says I'm a carbon copy in terms of personality of my dad,

And we're very similar in a lot of ways,

Which means that because we are stubborn and hot-tempered in certain ways,

I'm a little bit milder than him,

But in general,

We're very similar,

So we end up clashing a lot.

And also,

I'm very stubborn,

And I don't like people telling me what to do,

And my dad likes doing that in general.

I mean,

He's a good guy in many different ways,

And he's amazing,

It's awesome.

But sometimes I'm like,

Why are you doing this?

So I get irked by it.

And a lot of times what happens is that in the past,

What I would do is I would run away and yell at him,

I'd throw things,

And I'd yell,

I'd run away.

And what I'm really trying to do this time around is be like,

Alright,

What's going on here?

Why am I feeling this way?

Why am I getting angry with him?

Or what's the point here?

Why am I yelling about this?

Is there any point?

Is that going to solve the situation?

How about we sit down and really think about what's going on and try to go deeper within myself?

And where is this coming from?

Is it coming from guilt?

Is it coming from one of my shadows?

Is it a trigger?

Why am I being triggered?

You know,

So I'm asking myself all these questions.

I'm not saying that I'm doing a better job of dealing with him this time around.

Absolutely not.

In fact,

Because I'm asking all these questions,

It's probably on top of my mind a lot,

And I'm probably doing a worse job of it.

But the point is that the cure for the pain,

Whatever the pain might be,

Doesn't necessarily mean that it has to be painful.

But whatever your thing might be,

It might be a trigger.

It might be something that irks you,

Something that annoys you,

Something that frustrates you,

Something that you're jealous of,

Something that is a negative point in your life,

And something that is a negative streak in your life,

Something that causes you to feel like,

Ah,

If this wasn't the case,

My life would be perfect,

Right?

And so that pain,

Whatever that is,

The cure for it exists within the pain itself.

And so what we need to do,

As Rumi tells us,

Is we need to focus on the pain itself.

We need to lean into it and ask it questions.

And what we do in a lot of meditations is that we kind of relax our bodies enough and relax our mind enough that our hearts start speaking,

And it tells us of the pain within us.

And it tells us,

Oh,

When I was a child,

This happened to me and I hated it,

Or that happened to me and I didn't like it.

And then when our hearts start speaking,

We're able to lean into it and be really with it and realize what the pain is all about,

Really.

What happened there?

Why did it happen that way?

How can I help myself?

How can I trust myself again?

Or how can I protect myself?

How can I soothe myself?

How can I heal myself?

Right?

But it can only start,

As Rumi says,

When we start focusing on the pain itself.

I've said this before many times in other videos,

But most of us,

What we do is we run away from it or worse,

We start blaming other people for it.

And so I did this as well.

I do this as well.

Whenever something happens with my dad and we have a conflict,

I'm like,

It's his fault.

He is the one who's being unreasonable.

It's not me.

It's him.

Right?

And I know that I do this and I've done this many times and I'm not perfect,

As obviously is the case.

But I know that I do this and I know now that I can watch myself do it and I can observe myself.

But like,

All right,

What are you doing?

You know,

You do this all the time.

Why are you doing this?

And just that that consciousness,

Just that that momentary lapse where instead of jumping into getting a reaction or,

You know,

Giving a reaction to my father when he's doing something that irks me and so giving that reaction right away,

I take a little moment,

A little pause,

A little break at five seconds.

Right.

Or whatever.

Might be two or three seconds.

And that in itself kind of really helps me a lot,

A lot,

A lot.

Like it literally is one of those things where I'm not jumping into yelling at him or being angry with him or I'm still not perfect yet,

Of course.

I'm still doing I'm still working on this,

But I'm not completely jumping into that completely crazy,

Psychotic thing that I used to do in the in the past where I would just be like insane.

And so this is something that I've been really trying to portray in a lot of my videos as well as the shadow work that a lot of us need to do.

And now that we have the time in the quarantine,

I think it's a great idea to just sit with it,

Like sit with things that are coming up.

What are the frustrations that you're feeling?

What are the insecurities?

What are the traumas that you're feeling?

What are the sadnesses you're feeling?

Frustrations,

The jealousies.

What's going on within you?

What's going on in your heart?

What is your heart telling you?

What is your mind telling you?

What are the stories that you're telling yourself?

The stories that we tell ourselves all the time?

You know,

This is the reason why I'm not successful or this is the reason why that didn't work.

Who are you blaming for all of the inadequacies or the frustrations in your life?

Are you blaming someone else or realizing that in fact it is your own fault most of the time?

And so what happens is as we sit with the pain is that we kind of discover a cure for it.

Because until we are running from it and we're not noticing it or looking at it or even observing it,

It's there and it's running after us.

It's a shadow.

It's going to run after us forever and ever and ever.

We could run off to the first corner of the world,

You know,

Deepest ocean in the world,

And it'd still be there.

It's a shadow.

It's attached to us.

You can never outrun it.

And so it's always there and we always frustrate ourselves thinking,

Why am I still dealing with this?

Well,

You haven't actually dealt with it.

You haven't looked at it properly.

You haven't looked at the reason for it or the underlying trigger for it or whatever it might be.

You have been you've been running away from it.

And I did this a lot.

You know,

I ran away by traveling to different places or I ran away by moving out of my parents' house and running away that way.

Not coming back enough or even talking to them properly.

I ran away by doing other things,

Many,

Many,

Many other things like alcohol,

Drugs,

Things like that.

And so I ran away in so many different ways that now that I'm actually not running away,

It's actually very uncomfortable,

Of course,

But also extremely gratifying.

All of a sudden,

I'm getting all of these insights into myself that I'm realizing,

Whoa,

Whoa,

Whoa.

These are all the things that I could have found out earlier if I had just taken two seconds,

Five seconds.

If I just step back a little bit and try to observe where is the pain coming from?

Why am I running away from this?

Why can't I just stay still and observe it and actually sit with it and try to find the cure within the pain itself?

Because it's there.

It's actually the reason why we're given the pain is because it's a gift.

It's a gift wrapped up in pain,

But there's a gift within it.

And the gift is more understanding,

Self-knowledge,

Reflection,

Actually knowing more about yourself.

Know thyself is one of the paradigms of life and the pain that we're feeling,

The shadows that we're seeing within ourselves,

The triggers that we're feeling.

All of those carry a gift within it,

Which is the cure.

And the cure is what's going to help us heal.

It's going to help us learn more about ourselves.

It's going to tell us,

Oh,

This is something that I never like to talk about by myself.

But now I can actually look at it and really understand it.

And perhaps through that measure,

I can understand myself better.

And the more I understand myself,

The more the trigger falls away,

The more the pain falls away,

The more the shadow falls away and becomes less and less,

Less and less important,

Less and less big,

Less and less monstrous.

Because the more we run away from it,

The bigger the monster is.

And you actually turn around and look at the shadow like,

All right,

I'm not going to run away anymore.

You're there.

I can see it.

I can see you.

I see you.

I'm going to lean into you.

I know it's terrifying.

It's scary.

I don't want to do it,

But I'm going to.

And from that,

What happens is that we learn more about ourselves because the cure for the pain is in the pain itself.

And that's so important.

And I just love that quote so much that I wanted to share with you guys.

I love Rumi so much.

He's so brilliant.

All of his wisdom comes directly from the universal consciousness.

He is absolutely,

Absolutely brilliant.

If you haven't read Rumi's stuff before,

I do recommend that you read him.

He's such a good poet.

Any case and a very spiritual person as well in general.

I think he's a Sufi.

So anyways,

This is what I wanted to share with you guys.

Again,

I'm not saying I'm an expert on it.

Absolutely not.

I am terrible at it and I'm still learning.

I'm still growing.

But I thought I'd share with you guys,

You know,

This journey that I'm on so that perhaps in the future,

When we look back upon it,

You can be like,

Oh,

My God,

You've actually done a lot.

You made progress.

Or no,

You haven't made progress.

And you have a lot more to do on the subject.

I hope this makes sense.

As I said,

If you have questions about us,

Obviously comment below.

And we can talk a lot more about it.

I can do more videos on it.

I do recommend you read the book The Dark Side of the Light Chasers.

It's a great book on the subject by Deborah Ford,

I think.

A really good book on shadow work in general.

If you have questions,

Comment below.

And again,

Thank you so much for watching.

I really appreciate the support.

I shall see you guys next time around.

Bye for now.

Reviews

Thank you for sharing this insight 🐱

What you said resonated so highly with me. We are at the same place in the journey. Thank you for putting it in words ❤️

Beautiful!!
Thank you for sharing this.