Welcome,
My name is Bodhipaksha and I'm going to be leading a period of metta bhavana,
Usually called loving-kindness meditation.
And this is an unusual form of the practice.
It's
something I came up with many years ago when I was having problems with self-hatred.
And we're
going to be regarding ourselves as being the friend,
The neutral person,
And the person that
we have difficulty with.
And right at the start I'd like to say that the word loving-kindness
isn't necessarily very helpful.
So just think in terms not of cultivating this thing called
loving-kindness,
But about being kind.
We all know what it feels like to be kind,
Or to receive
kindness,
Or we know somebody who's kind.
We know what those qualities of kindness are like.
So as
you're sitting here right now,
Just consider what it means to sit with kindness.
So that
might imply not sitting holding yourself rigidly,
Not striving,
Not trying to look cool or to
impress anyone,
Even yourself.
But it also means not sitting in a way that's slumped or resigned,
Not collapsing,
Because sitting that way isn't helpful for our well-being.
So instead we're
sitting with a sense of poise,
Dignity,
And ease.
And you can just notice whatever feelings are
arising in this moment.
And whether they're pleasant or unpleasant,
Or whether you're not
sure what you're feeling,
Or you aren't feeling anything,
Just accepting whatever you find.
It's
all okay.
And you can begin to empathize with yourself,
Recognizing that you have a deep-rooted
desire to be at peace,
To be happy,
To be free from suffering.
You share this deep-rooted desire
with all beings.
So just check this out in your experience.
If there's suffering in your experience
now,
You probably want to be free from it.
And just recognizing also that it's not easy to be
human.
We all want to be at peace.
We all want to be happy.
We all want to be free from suffering.
And yet the nature of life is that peace is rare,
That happiness doesn't come as often as we would
like,
Doesn't last as long as we would like,
And suffering keeps coming around unexpectedly,
And much more often than we would like it to.
And this isn't a personal feeling.
This is a
universal fact of being human.
So we're doing a difficult thing in being human.
And knowing that,
We can support ourselves.
So we can offer ourselves support by saying,
May you be at peace.
May you be free from suffering.
May you be kind to yourself and
others.
May you be at peace.
May you be free from suffering.
May you be kind to yourself and others.
So just dropping these phrases in as communications to ourself,
Ways of offering
ourselves support.
So just keep dropping those phrases in,
Offering yourself support and
encouragement.
And now I invite you to call to mind aspects of yourself,
Either that you like,
Or admire,
Or think are wholesome,
Or that other people have admired in you or appreciated in you.
So this could be very simple,
Like things that you care about,
Or a desire to be ethical,
A desire to be kind,
A desire to be at peace.
If you have difficulty thinking of a good quality
you have,
Which can happen.
And we all have qualities like kindness,
Patience,
Clarity,
Even if they're not present a lot of the time.
And I invite you to wish those good qualities well,
To wish that they grow and increase.
So you can say,
May my good quality,
And you would name that good quality,
Grow and increase.
You can say,
May my good quality,
Again naming your good quality,
Bring me happiness.
May my good quality bring me peace.
And if you've identified a number of skillful qualities,
You can work your way through them
in this way.
Now,
Calling to mind qualities that you only have perhaps in potential.
Good
qualities,
Skillful qualities,
That you would like to develop more strongly.
And this could
be some of the same qualities as in the previous stage.
So maybe you would like to have more
confidence,
For example.
And you could say,
May my confidence grow and increase.
May the confident
part of me flourish.
May my confidence bring me peace and happiness.
So you can just apply this
to whatever qualities you would like to see develop in yourself,
Perhaps running through
a number of them.
And then you can call to mind parts of you that you have a difficult relationship
with.
Parts of you that perhaps bring suffering to your life.
Maybe fear,
Or anger,
Or self-doubt.
And you can wish those parts of you well.
May the fearful part of me be at peace.
May the fearful
part of me be happy.
May the fearful part of me be free from suffering.
And again,
If there are
more than one part of yourself that you have this difficult relationship with,
You can run through
several of them.
And we can consider that we're not alone,
That all beings fundamentally are the
same as us.
All beings want to be happy,
Or at peace,
Or to be free from suffering.
And yet,
We're all struggling in our own ways,
Not experiencing as much peace or happiness as
we would like,
And suffering much more than we care to.
And all of us have good qualities,
Skillful qualities that are underdeveloped,
And qualities that cause us suffering.
So you can just
be aware of the world around you right now.
You may hear voices,
Or vehicles,
Airplanes,
Sounds of people moving around.
So there can be all these signs of the presence of others.
Or sometimes you just know that they're there.
So just considering that they are just like you,
Doing a difficult thing of being human.
And you can wish them well.
May we all be at peace.
May we all find happiness.
May we all be kind to ourselves and each other.
And just relaxing back into an awareness of your own being sitting here.
And just
appreciating the efforts that you've been making.
It's an unusual thing to sit and deliberately
cultivate kindness.
And if this has in any way been a struggle,
And there are lingering painful
feelings,
Then just turning towards those feelings right now.
Being aware of them in the body,
And wishing them well.
May you be at peace.
May you be happy.
And then when you feel ready,
Bringing your attention more fully into the world by allowing the eyes to open.
