What Does It Mean To Live A Successful And Happy Life?

In this episode, Amber shares with you her story in redefining success and happiness, how she had to move towards fear and take big risks, and turned the once impossible into possible. She also guides you through a meditation for cultivating a feel and sense of happiness and success.

04:04 - when I quite everything, moved and started studying yoga

07:46 - what success means to me

10:05 - what are you doing that's in alignment with YOUR definition of success?

15:08 - your internal compass

16

Transcript

This is the Yoga Off the Mat podcast.

A space you can learn how to deepen your connection with yourself to live a fulfilled,

Passionate,

And authentic life using the lessons from the mat.

I'm your guide,

Host,

And teacher,

Amber Hackberg,

And I'm here to inspire you to take time for yourself so that you can embody the practice of yoga and live your yoga on and off the mat.

Hello!

Yoga Off the Mat podcast with Amber Hackberg,

Episode number 10.

Oh,

I am so excited to have you here listening today.

We're going to be diving into success,

Happiness,

And creating our lives by the way in which we define success,

Happiness,

And fulfillment.

I want to start by just sharing with you my story.

My dad died when I was 17 just before I graduated high school.

When I graduated high school,

I wanted to make him proud.

It was my goal.

How can I make my dad proud of me?

So I signed up for college.

I had a long-term boyfriend.

We had been together since my freshman year in high school,

And I had two full-time jobs.

I was going to school,

And I wanted to make him proud.

So I committed.

I was not sure what I wanted to study.

I started studying my associate's degree,

Working towards business.

I was saving money.

I was doing it,

Right?

What they told me,

What I thought was going to bring me happiness and success and drive me towards this life that was painted for me.

Go to school,

Get a job,

Get married,

Have a baby,

Get a house.

And I was on my way.

There was only one problem.

I wasn't happy.

I had it all,

A savings account,

A car,

A house,

A boyfriend,

Job,

Security,

College.

It was all there.

But I was stressed out.

I was unhappy.

And I was just going through the motions without a drive,

Without desire.

I'm curious for you if you've ever been there before or if you're there now.

When you think about success,

What does success mean to you?

When you think about being happy,

What does being happy mean to you?

I had luckily been introduced to yoga in the midst of all this,

Grieving over my father's death,

Going to school,

Having the job,

Doing the things.

And it was the one place I felt free.

And when I realized how unhappy I was and I knew that I needed to do something different,

There was a problem.

I was afraid that if I didn't do it the right quote unquote right way,

I would be a failure to my dad.

I would let my family down.

But this misery that I was in,

I couldn't stay there anymore.

So I did a big thing.

I told my step sister,

I'm going to drop out of college.

I'm going to quit my job.

I'm going to leave my boyfriend and I'm going to move to Colorado.

I'm going to study yoga.

I had no idea what was going to happen.

I didn't know I was going to make a career out of yoga.

I didn't know that I was going to create friends and family or become so successful and so happy.

I just knew I couldn't stay where I was.

I knew I had to do something different and I was following my heart.

I followed my heart.

My heart was calling me and telling me yoga,

Yoga.

It just kept coming back to me through friends,

Through connection.

And I listened.

I moved across the country and I started over.

For four and a half years,

I studied yoga.

I was teaching yoga.

I ended up getting back with my boyfriend from high school.

He followed me on out there and we tried again.

It didn't work out,

But at least we gave it a go.

And what I discovered along the way is sometimes we get so comfortable being comfortable that we'll stay where we are rather than risk,

Rather than risk turning what was once impossible into possible.

And this is what yoga gave me confidence to do.

It gave me the strength to believe in myself because I was starting to be able to do these physical asana postures that I was once so not capable of.

And it came from my commitment to my daily practice.

It gave me confidence and courage to just keep going.

It allowed me to move into things that I was afraid of,

Handstand,

Going upside down,

Turning over,

Going into a backbend.

I wasn't flexible.

I wasn't strong.

These things didn't come natural to me.

If you listen to the last episode,

I was like the chubby girl,

You know,

The one where people would tease me like my boobs would knock me out.

I wasn't any of those things we think we need to be to practice yoga.

And yet here I was going upside down,

Doing these crazy backbends and turning the ones impossible into possible.

And so yoga helped me to turn these crazy ideas I had in my mind into my freaking reality.

And what I discovered along the way is that I can do anything I imagine.

If it's in my mind,

If it's a desire that I have,

If I take massive action,

I can do it.

And guess what,

My friend?

So can you.

What's something that you've been wanting to do?

Is there something calling you?

Something that you really want to do but you're afraid like what if it doesn't work out?

I'm inviting you to take a risk.

Have a plan and then a backup plan and then another one.

But if it's worth it to you to get out of where you are,

You only have one way to find out.

And that's to give it a go.

Go all in.

It's worth it,

I know,

For certain.

And in this journey of breaking the rules,

Doing things that I wasn't taught,

Going against the quote unquote normal,

I didn't fail.

I redefined success because success to me doesn't mean money and power.

Yes,

I love money.

I think we all need it.

We need money.

Money is a beautiful thing.

It allows for exactly what I define success to be.

To me,

Success is freedom.

Freedom to go where I want,

When I want,

With who I want.

For me,

Success is the ability to live my life in a way where I feel free.

When I was following the American dream,

When I was following the shoulds,

I was not free.

I was in a box and that box didn't work for me.

And my mantra for so long was I just want to be happy.

I didn't know what happy meant.

But for me,

Happiness became being me,

Unapologetically myself.

And I was the flower child,

The one that started to cut out meat and eat more greens,

The one that would sell everything she had and live out of a backpack.

I was that weird one.

But for me,

That was my happiness.

That was my success.

And I didn't need someone else to define it for me because when I did,

I was miserable.

I was unhappy.

And that's how I began to live my yoga,

By breaking the rules,

Being myself,

And knowing that I might stand out,

That I might be different.

And that's okay because that's what means being yourself.

And I couldn't have done that.

I couldn't have defined happiness,

Success,

Breaking the rules,

And being unapologetically myself without the practice of yoga,

Without getting onto my yoga mat,

Heavy,

Sweaty,

Not balanced,

So inflexible.

It gave me courage.

It gave me confidence and the ability to believe in the impossible.

And so when you look at your life right now,

What are you doing that is in alignment with your definition of success,

Your definition of happiness,

If anything?

And when we begin to prioritize our wants,

Our needs,

Our joy,

We become fulfilled because we're no longer just doing the motions.

We're creating a life of passion and purpose by coming up with our own definitions,

By being unique.

There's seven billion people on this planet and we're all so very different and that is so beautiful.

That's what makes us so amazing,

To be different,

To be unique.

And if you're in this place where you're like,

Amber,

I'm stuck.

I don't know what makes me happy.

I don't know what success means to me.

I've been there.

I know.

And you have to just start trying new things,

Do things differently,

Start a new hobby,

Get into a new form of exercise,

Go to a new career.

If you're not happy in your relationship and it's not in alignment with your values,

It's time to walk away.

These things are scary and it's not easy because you have to make a decision.

And in those decisions,

Those decisions rattle us.

They shake us up inside because on the other side of comfortable is uncomfortable.

On the other side of known is the unknown.

But that's where the growth is.

That's where the magic happens and that's where you turn what seemed like just impossible in your mind,

This dream,

Not real,

Into living your reality,

Living your dream.

And so many things in this world were created from someone's thought,

Someone's idea.

Think about the cell phone.

Think about your computer or the cars that drive themselves.

Those were all once impossible.

Let's go back.

When I was growing up,

We had these long telephones wrapped in curly lines and you would crawl into another room with this long cell,

This long telephone so no one else could hear you.

And I promise you,

What seems like impossible for you right now is 100% possible.

It's just a matter of figuring out how.

If you don't already have a daily yoga practice,

Start moving your body.

Reach out to me.

See if the Live Your Yoga mentorship is a good start for you to get into your yoga practice because that's what helped me getting onto my yoga mat every single day,

Moving my body and seeing that I was physically capable of more the more that I showed up.

And that,

Let me tell you,

Not only did I move from Iowa,

Farm girl in Iowa,

Waitress,

To Colorado where I started over,

In Colorado I sold everything I had and I moved to another country.

I moved to this country,

No idea what I was going to do.

When I was living in Colorado,

I had an amazing job.

I was teaching yoga full time.

I had a really solid and secure paycheck,

A house,

A car again.

I had it all.

I was super successful and my heart was calling me to Costa Rica.

Again,

I did it.

I sold everything I had and I moved to a country where minimum wage was $3 and you're not allowed to work in the country without certain circumstances.

So I was taking a huge risk.

And guess what?

I became even more successful.

I turned this impossible dream.

I just want to teach yoga on the beach.

I want to lead yoga retreats.

I want to teach yoga teacher trainings.

And I did it again.

And not only did I do that in Costa Rica,

But I started traveling around the world and doing this.

I've led yoga retreats and teacher trainings in Australia,

Morocco,

Bali,

So many places.

And it started from something where I didn't feel like I was enough.

I didn't think this was possible.

And you probably know listening to this,

That's not the American dream.

That's not success.

But to me,

It was.

It was my dream.

And I didn't think I was worth it.

I didn't think I was capable of it,

But I wanted it.

It was a desire and it was my roadmap.

I always say that your heart is your internal compass.

Listen to your heart.

She's speaking to you.

And sometimes we stay so busy,

Stressed out and putting our energy into all these other things that we lose track of what's really important.

And that's your heart and your desire and what you value.

Something that we really work on in the Live Your Yoga mentorship is what are your values and are your actions on a daily basis in alignment with your values?

Because if not,

Something's got to change.

You want to lead by example.

Start living in alignment with what you value.

If you value honesty,

If you value love,

If you value respect,

Are you being respectable?

Are you being honest?

Are you living by what you say you believe in?

Then you might take a few steps back from your life right now and ask yourself,

What's holding me back?

Is it fear?

Is it doubt?

Is it unknown?

Is it uncertainty?

Is there something that I would do right now if I could define success and happiness on my own?

I would love to guide you now through a meditation.

So you can tap into your own experience of success and happiness.

I believe that we are filled with information on a daily basis,

So much information that we forget to take it and turn it into wisdom through the embodied experience.

So if you can with me now,

Set things aside.

Find yourself into a comfortable seated position with your heart held high and your legs grounded.

Will you allow the eyes to close and you begin to draw the awareness into your breathing?

Breathe in and out of your nose.

Come into a time where you were really happy.

Think of it,

Relive it in your mind.

Remember what you were wearing,

Who you were with,

Where you were at.

Bring your mind and your attention to a time where you were really happy.

See if you can't magnify it by bringing it more and more to the surface.

Thinking of it,

Feeling it on a deeper and deeper level,

The more that you remember what was happening.

You can let that memory shift away and keep the feeling and body.

Now,

As you start to contemplate for you a time where you felt successful,

Like you did it.

Let it magnify,

Let it intensify.

Something that made you feel successful,

It can be something really small or really grand,

A memory that you have.

And let it come to the surface so bright in your memory that you begin to feel it from the inside out.

And now I want you to just settle into a space of stillness and observe how you feel.

Take a deep breath in,

Clearing exhale breath out.

On your next inhale,

Open your eyes.

And for you,

It's now just a contemplation of if there was a juicy memory that came to your mind that brought you happiness or a time where you felt really successful.

Was it the way in which others define success or was it your own?

And to use today's episode as a time of reflection,

Are your actions right now in alignment with your values of success and happiness?

And if not,

Create a list of some things,

Some action steps that you can start to take where you move in a way that brings you happiness and brings you success.

It's okay to break the rules.

It's okay to be yourself.

If that means living a life where you feel happy,

Where you feel like you're living a life of success,

Because there are many people that could say my life isn't a successful one,

But that doesn't matter to me anymore because I'm happy and I've created success because for me,

I've created a life of freedom and I'm not going to be liked and loved by everyone.

I'm not going to be looked up and admired to by everyone,

But that to me is irrelevant.

What matters most is that I'm prioritizing myself and I want you to do the same so that you can say I'm living a fulfilled and purposeful life.

That could even be your mantra.

I'm living a fulfilled and purposeful life.

I'm living a fulfilled and purposeful life.

One that you get to define.

One where every day you wake up and you're excited to get out of bed and start again.

My work to me isn't quote unquote work.

It is my calling.

It is my passion.

And I can't wait to start the next new day.

And I want you to stay the same.

But first you have to make your own rules and define your own successes.

And let me remind you,

The most sacred,

Intimate and longest lasting relationship that you ever have in this lifetime is the one that you have with yourself.

Be sure that you water it,

Nourish it and love it exactly where you are as you are.

Because you're meant to be here to have a bigger impact on the planet where you're full of energy,

Joy,

Passion and ear-grinning happiness.

That is your birthright.

Don't you forget it.

If you found value in this podcast,

This episode,

I highly encourage you to please share the message.

Put it on your social media outlets.

Hashtag Yoga Off The Map podcast.

Share it with your people.

And I will see you in our next episode.

And I want to thank you.

I really appreciate you tuning in and listening to this podcast.

It's an honor to know that people are listening and gaining value while generating their own insights.

For more actionable tools and practices,

Head over to my Facebook group,

Www.

Facebook.

Com slash groups slash yoga for inner peace to learn more practices that you can put into your toolbox to reduce stress,

Build confidence and create a community of other women who are like you wanting to better their lives to better their communities.

Thank you again for being here.

And if you're on social,

Post a photo of you listening to this and tag me,

Amber Hackberg.

So we can hang out online and continue growing this relationship first from the inside and then from the outside.

I'll see you on the next episode.