Meditation For Men - The Inner Critic

A 20 minute guided meditation for men who are hard on themselves.
There's a voice that gets there first. You get something wrong, and before you've moved on it's already said its piece.
Most men never examine it, because they assume it's them. It isn't. There's a voice, and there's you hearing it, and you've spent your life treating those as the same thing.
This meditation doesn't argue with it. Arguing is two voices fighting while you're still not in the room. It shows you where you're standing instead.
That voice didn't start as yours. It was in a room you were in a long time ago, and it stayed.
And it thinks it's protecting you. It learned early that if it got there first and said the hard thing, nobody else could hurt you with it. It's been doing that job for thirty years, badly, at a cost you've been paying without noticing.
You don't have to fight it. You don't have to forgive it either. You just have to know it's a voice, and that you're the one listening.

Transcript

Take a seat. Or lie down. And just gently let your eyes close. Take a slow deep breath in. And release. Is to allow your shoulders to drop. And I ask you to be present in your body. Now we're gonna start with the physiological side. Deep breath in through the nose. Sip through the mouth. And exhale with a sigh. I do this three times. Take a slow deep breath in. To release. As we release the past. Take another breath in. Sip. Release. As we release the future. Take one more slow, Deep breath in. Release. As we come in to the present. This is where we'll always start. Physiological side to bring us into the body. Let us let yourself land for a moment. Feel the weight of yourself. Wherever you are. Now I want you to think of something you got wrong recently. Nothing huge. Something small and ordinary. Than you said. Thing you forgot. A thing you didn't do. And listen to what you say to yourself about it. Not what you'd say out loud. What actually runs underneath. Notice the tone of it. Not the words. The Dome. Is it sharp? Is it tired? Is it bored of you? Now I want you to notice. If it sounds like anyone. Not who it is. Whether it sounds like someone. See, Most men find that voice didn't start with theirs. It was in a room they were in. A room a long time ago. And it just stayed. Don't work it out. Just notice if something recognizes it. Here's the thing I want you to feel rather than agree with. You're listening to it. Which means you're not it. There is a voice. And there's you. You hearing the voice. Those are two different things. And you've spent most of your life assuming they were one. So let it talk. Don't argue with it. Done corrected. Don't try to replace it with something kinder. That's just two voices fighting, And you're still not in the room. So just let it run. And stay where you are. Just listening. Notice what happens to him when you stop fighting. Usually gets quieter. Or because you beat it. Because it was only ever that loud to be heard. And bring your attention to your jewel. Let it go. Your shoulders. Let them drop. Your hands. At the fingers open. The critic lives in the body too. It's been holding you in a shape all day. Now the breath. Don't control it. Just watch it arrive. And leave. And each time the voice starts up again. And it will. Don't push it away. Just come back to the breath. And let it talk to an empty room. That voice thinks is protecting you. And learn early. If it got there first. And said the hard thing. And nobody else could hurt you with it. And it's been doing that job for 20 years. 40 years. Very badly. At a cost you've been paying without noticing. But that was the joke. Where you don't have to fight it today. You don't have to forgive it either. You just have to know it's a voice. And that you're the one listening. And slowly start to come back. Let each breath get a little fuller. Not forced. Just let it deepen on its own. Start to notice the room again. Whatever sound is in it. Temperature of the air on your skin. The light behind your eyelids. To bring some gentle movement back into the body. Your fingers. Your toes. Roll their shoulders if they want. Move your head slightly. Side to side. And even have a gentle stretch if you like. And when you're ready. In your own time. There's no rush. And slowly let your eyes open. And make sure you take a second before reaching for anything. Or whatever that voice says about the rest of today. You know what it is now.