When The Valentine’s Day Petals Have Wilted

Valentine’s Day often teaches us to measure love by how it feels: intensity, closeness and being chosen. But when the feelings fade, many people assume something has gone wrong.

In this reflection, I explore the difference between love, cathexis and care. Cathexis is the emotional charge and attachment that can feel like love but is often organised around reassurance and regulation. Care is the impulse to support, rescue or carry, which can sometimes block growth when it becomes over-functioning.

Love, as I describe it here, is something else entirely. It is not organised around comfort or intensity, but around truth, responsibility and development. It asks whether a relationship has the capacity to evolve, rather than simply stay comfortable.

This track is an invitation to look more honestly at what’s holding your relationships together, long after the petals have fallen.