So,
Welcome everyone.
I invite you into a sacred space of reflection and deep inner listening.
Now,
This meditation is for moments where I wonder,
Where I may feel,
Why am I not healing?
Why is this pain still there?
And why,
Despite everything I've tried,
Do I feel stuck?
And in this space,
We will not search for any fixes,
Instead,
And we will very gently turn inwards and ask,
Not what's wrong,
But what wants to be seen.
And we will listen,
Not just with our minds,
But with our hearts and our bodies.
Now sometimes,
Healing doesn't look the way we expect.
Sometimes,
What we call delay is divine timing.
And sometimes,
What we call pain is an invitation to grow in ways we may never understand.
Now,
If God has allowed it,
It must be for my highest good.
And you're welcome to replace the word God with anything else,
Any other belief system that you may have.
So let's begin.
Now,
Find a comfortable position,
Sitting up,
Lying down.
And just begin first by just being comfortable in your bodies.
If your body allows,
You can very gently close your eyes,
Let your hands rest softly,
Let your shoulders drop,
And just let your breath begin to slow down a little bit.
You can take a deep breath in through your nose,
And if your body allows,
Exhale through your mouth.
And again,
In through the nose,
Gently breathing out through your mouth.
With each breath,
Find yourself landing more fully into the present moment.
Feel your body begin to soften,
And just let go of any need to solve,
Fix,
Or figure it out.
There's nothing to force,
There's only a deep,
Deep,
Deep space to enter.
And as I keep breathing,
I fall deeper and deeper and deeper into this space.
Now,
As I sit here in this space,
As I'm going deeper now into my body,
I begin to disengage from my conscious mind,
My body starts to feel heavy,
And I may be more aware of sensations in my body.
I am here,
I am now,
And I am listening.
I am here and now,
And I am listening.
Now bring your attention to your physical body,
To your physical body,
And just notice any areas of tension,
Tightness,
Or numbness that you may have.
Am I aware of anything right now in my body?
Just gently explore this inquiry,
And just in case you're guided somewhere,
My chest,
To my stomach,
To my hips,
To my heart,
Or somewhere else,
I'm just going to breathe into them first.
Now these sensations,
They're not problems,
Maybe they are places in my body holding stories.
As I'm breathing into those areas of tightness,
I will also let myself feel being held by earth,
By the floor,
By the chair,
By the mat,
Wherever else you may be.
You are very supported,
And you are safe,
You are very supported,
And you are safe.
Now gently bring your awareness to your heart,
If your body allows,
If it feels right for you,
Place your right palm on your heart center,
And just feel the rhythm of your heart.
What am I aware of right now under my heart,
Under my hand?
Feel the rhythm.
Now very gently,
Very slowly,
You'll drop these words into your body,
And just observe what happens.
Ask softly,
What is it that you want me to hear?
Or what is it you want me to hear?
And then just listen.
You may feel emotions arise,
Your heartbeat may become faster,
Or you may feel nothing at all.
That's all okay.
This moment is about presence,
And this is about meeting yourself with compassion.
In this very calm,
Compassionate space in my body,
Feeling safer,
I will now imagine myself walking through a quiet,
Sacred landscape,
A field,
Forest,
Desert,
A beach,
Anything.
Just go with whatever comes up for you.
And if you're not a visual person,
Just go with the feelings that my words bring up.
Just be present and allow this to unfold,
Whichever way it wants to for you today.
So wherever I am right now,
It feels still,
Open.
And as I step into this expanded space,
This is the landscape of my soul.
I am not here to escape my pain,
I am here to meet my pain.
I am here right now to remember that my soul chose to grow.
And sometimes,
Growth happens through experiences that don't make sense,
Through losses,
Delays,
Setbacks,
Heartache,
Emotional pain.
And this pain in this space right now,
This mystery,
It's not a punishment,
But a sacred unfolding.
Now just breathe these words in,
You are not broken,
You are becoming.
Now let the wind of this landscape move through you,
Let it clear away any dust of judgment,
And let it remind you,
This is your path,
This is what you chose.
Now,
Now bring forward this question,
Why am I not healing?
Why am I not at peace?
And sitting in this expanded space,
In the landscape of my soul,
Just wait,
See what shows up for you.
Now you may feel it in your body,
You may have a sensation,
Warmth,
Cold,
Tingling.
You may have a thought,
A vision,
A memory,
An insight,
A color.
Or you may just be receiving this knowledge without consciously understanding the process.
All that is okay.
When I say the words,
Why am I not healing?
Why am I not at peace?
Just feel how this lives in your body,
And where does this sit?
In your chest,
Your stomach,
Or in your throat.
And don't try and change anything right now,
Just notice,
Just notice.
Now,
We'll gently shift the question.
Now we'll say,
What is still here that wants to be seen?
What is still here that wants to be seen?
And let that question now echo in the space.
What is still here that wants to be seen?
Now sometimes we are not blocked,
We are in the process of healing.
And sometimes,
Healing takes the form of endurance,
Resilience,
Not resolution,
Not what my conscious mind wants.
Sometimes the pain is simply a guide.
So we'll ask another question now.
What is this experience?
What is this experience that is trying to grow in me?
What am I being asked to surrender?
Now with these inquiries,
I may be aware of a situation,
A person,
Or situations I may be having emotions,
Just letting all that be and noticing.
I've made an inquiry with my body,
And the wisdom of my body,
The wisdom of the universe,
Is now giving me the insights and the information that I need.
Why am I not healing?
What is still here that wants to be seen?
What is this experience trying to grow in me?
Just for another few seconds,
Let yourself rest in the unknown.
Let yourself rest in this inquiry,
And just continue to see what shows up for you.
Now imagine above you,
Looking at the sky,
That the sky now opens,
And a white,
Golden,
Yellow,
Or any other color of light starts to pour down over you.
Starts to pour down over you.
Now as I'm sitting in this inquiry,
I'm also receiving this light from the sky.
Now this light is grace.
This light is helping you realize what it feels like to truly believe this is exactly where I'm meant to be.
I am exactly where I'm meant to be.
I'm just going to breathe this grace in,
This understanding,
This wisdom that's dropping now from the sky into my body.
And it's going wherever I need it the most.
My situation,
My challenge,
What I'm not healing,
Is in front of me.
It's in my awareness.
And now through the wisdom of the universe,
There is grace landing into my body.
And that grace is telling me,
If this is here,
God has allowed it.
And if it's allowed,
It must hold something sacred for me.
If this is here,
God has allowed it.
And if it's allowed,
It must hold something sacred for me.
Now just let this sink in.
Let this grace go wherever it's needed the most.
Now the wound,
The pain,
The challenge,
The situation,
Or whatever else showed up for you today in this exploration,
With the help of grace,
If it feels right for you,
You can now imagine either visually or just in your body,
Handing over this wound,
This pain,
This situation to the divine light.
Let it lift from your hands.
Let it release and rise up.
Now as you're holding this in your hand,
And through the power and beauty of grace as it's leaving you and going up to the divine,
Just let these words drop into your awareness.
I release the need to change this.
This is perfect timing.
I welcome this lesson even though I don't understand it.
I trust divine order.
I trust the unfolding of my life.
This is exactly what I chose on a soul level.
I am still healing.
I am not broken.
I am not blocked.
I am still healing.
Now let each word land into your body.
Let each word land into your nervous system.
And let each word replace urgency,
Impatience,
Or disappointment with trust.
Now if you choose,
You can pause this meditation and stay here in the energy.
Sit with grace.
If you're guided to stay here longer,
Or you're very welcome now to return with grace.
So slowly,
Gently,
We'll start to bring our awareness back to the body.
Just start by feeling the surface beneath you.
The floor,
The chair,
The mat.
Then start by feeling the breath within you.
Then the quietness around you.
You are still here.
You are still here.
You are still here.
Wiggle your fingers.
Move your shoulders.
Take a deep breath.
As you breathe out,
You're very,
Very,
Very welcome to open your eyes.
Now whatever you've brought in today as an understanding,
Just remember that my life is unfolding exactly the way it's meant to.
My conscious mind may or may not understand it.
It may never understand it in this incarnation.
There is nothing wrong with me.
There is nothing wrong with my life.
There is only life doing what life does.
It is always growing.
It is always transforming.
It is always deepening people.
And once again,
If God has allowed it,
If this is here,
It must be right for me.
Now thank you very much for being here with me.
And may this practice remind you that you're not forgotten and grace is always with you.
So thank you very much,
Everyone.
Namaste.
