My Talk With A Frustrated Mom (God, Love, Trust)

Tiger shares a powerful excerpt from a real conversation — a moment of honesty, reflection, and deep compassion. Speaking directly to the rawness many parents feel but rarely express, Tiger gently explores the guilt beneath frustration, the fear of not being enough, and the pressure to hold it all together.

Rather than offering parenting advice, this is an invitation to be human. Tiger reflects on how our children mirror the places within us still needing love, and how honesty—not perfection-is — is what truly nourishes connection. For any parent navigating the messy beauty of raising children while meeting their emotional truth, this talk offers warmth, clarity, and a deeply human permission to not have it all figured out.

Transcript

You see,

As we take a moment to look at these things,

Which is really a self-honesty that says,

Wait,

What's really going on here?

You can recognize that in those moments of frustration,

There's an enormous amount of guilt.

So there's frustration about being frustrated,

Which creates this sort of resistance to your experience.

And I hope that's what's seen is that if you're frustrated,

It's okay that you're frustrated,

Which is almost like extending a permission for you to be honest,

Rather than trying to hide it,

Rather than trying to cover it up.

And then also share that honesty with your kids.

Especially when we can also notice in these times,

Oh,

It's not really about them.

I see that I have this fear that it means I'm not enough as a mom.

I'm afraid of what this means about me.

Okay,

So the frustration isn't really about them,

But yet the reality is,

Is that I'm frustrated.

I'm scared.

And I think it's such a beautiful opportunity and doorway to share that humanity with your child or children,

That gosh,

This really scares me.

There's not a right or wrong way of going about it.

We're just introducing more honesty.

And sometimes as a parent,

Part of the honesty is making decisions for the lives of these little ones that they might not think are important.

And then sometimes it's not.

It goes both ways.

There's a time and place for it all.

But also what I think you'll find is that the more we introduce honesty and humanity,

It'll help you make wiser choices.

Like choices that aren't fueled by a fear,

But more fueled by the love,

A deep caring.

And of course it'll be messy.

I think really what is missed is that when we don't allow ourselves to be human,

Then we don't allow ourselves to be honest about being human,

Which in the role of parenting tells the child it's not okay to be human.

But when we can articulate our humanity in some way,

It's an expression of acceptance for our humanity.

And they learn that,

Oh,

It's okay.

Because,

I mean,

If we look at our own experience,

And I assume it's true to some degree,

That when we were growing up as kids,

The message we got was it's not okay to be human.

You need to match this particular image that helps other people be comfortable,

Which is don't be a mirror that shows other people where they're dissatisfied.

And that is so obviously the perfect role of children to do,

Is to bring out of you your fears and insecurities.

I hope that in some way it inspires a love for your children as they are when it's seen that it's not really their fault.

That in fact,

The way that they are is a gift that exposes an opportunity within you to bring love to those parts of yourself that you don't.

It's very much like looking back at a painful experience you went through,

But you grew so much from it.

And you had no idea what a blessing it was.

And then you fall in love with that experience,

Like,

Gosh,

I'm so thankful for that.

And this is what we're going to discover as it relates to everyone we encounter.

Gosh,

I'm so thankful that people are people.

I'm so thankful that people don't do what I want them to do.

I'm so thankful life is exactly the way that it is,

Because it's been set up to be the perfect mirror that I need to see the truth of what I am.

I think it's beautiful how scary it all is.

Because in one way,

Yeah,

It really exposes that who you think you are is not enough.

There's a part of you that wants to control it,

Wants it to be a certain way.

And you see that who you think you are is not enough to do that.

And that terror in the truth of things points you to surrender to the truth of things.

You know,

Again,

In a religious way that could be twisted,

It really points to a truth in the fear of God.

Like it could be said that the only thing you should fear is God.

And it's said because that's the truth,

The only thing you do fear is God,

Which is the truth.

We see how much we can't hold on to.

It's true.

It's scary.

How much control we don't have.

It's true.

It's scary.

But all of that fear invites you to embrace the truth,

To see that the truth is okay.

It's okay that only God is in control.

It's okay that you don't know.

It's okay that who you think you are isn't enough.

And again,

Our problem with these things are our resistance to them.

Just like the nature of inadequacy.

The problem is not that who we think we are is inadequate.

Our problem is that we want it to be different.

And this speaks so much to the image of the devil that's trying to be God.

The devil is resisting the way of things and wanting it to be how he wants it to be and creates hell in the process.

And is that not just the perfect symbology of what's going on inside of us?

Fighting the way of things rather than surrendering to them.

It's like wanting the world to be different.

Good luck.

And the more you surrender that idea,

You become more open to see what the world really is.

And you start to see that it's perfect.

It's like,

Oh,

This is actually in my favor.

It's like,

I didn't see what God really created.

I love that you say,

I want a clean slate.

Because in one way,

These things that we say that we want,

We have them.

We just don't see that we have them.

And it makes sense that we don't see it because it can be confusing on the level of mind.

In one way,

The clean slate is a forgiveness toward the experience you're trying to get rid of.

And what I mean by that is,

It's perfectly fine that you're having the experience that you're having,

Which we might just call the memory of my childhood rejection.

Because you see,

On the level of mind that's saying,

I want a clean slate,

It's saying,

I don't want that thing.

I want the absence of it.

But really,

The clean slate is the absolute allowance of it if it's there.

Like,

It's not a problem.

Because I would also say that the part that sees it as a problem,

Sees it as a problem,

Right?

Like,

It shouldn't be there.

And what you're experiencing in the,

It shouldn't be there,

Is the judgment of it.

You're not experiencing the reality of it.

You're experiencing the resistance of it.

Like,

It's in my way.

And really,

It's not.

Again,

This speaks to recognizing how perfect the world is when we wanted it to be different.

There's a perfection in that memory.

And the perfection of it is holding space for it in a way that sees the beauty and brilliance of your humanity.

Like,

It is okay.

And when you say it doesn't belong to you,

In one way,

Yes,

It's true.

But it's also true that it's completely valid.

It's very much a part of your human journey.

And on your human journey,

None of it belongs to you.

But it is very much the human journey you're going through.

And so,

It's almost like yes and no.

Like,

Yes,

It belongs to you.

And also,

No,

It doesn't.

Which is also to say,

It's also deserving of the love that you are.

You could almost see,

Like,

To say it doesn't belong to me is to say it's not deserving of love.

But that's not true.

It also speaks to just a profound acceptance for the journey that we've been on and the experiences that we've collected and the things we've been through.

Because in our human adventure,

We have created innocently,

Many misunderstandings about these things,

Which are also the opportunity to clarify these things.

They are our opportunity.

Everyone's childhood is a collection of misunderstandings.

In one way,

In our childhood,

You have been given the confusion of your parents so that you could help bring clarity to them.

Your parents gave you a confusion,

Which is like an absence of love because of their own fear.

And so,

You've been given this as an opportunity to restore love.

And in one way,

That's the foundation of your opportunity in this life,

Is to heal those confusion,

Which then get passed on.

And it's so wild to think that our life is really about the world or our future,

Right?

Like,

That's where the prize is,

Where we're going.

And it's like,

No,

The prize is what you've been given,

The journey you've had,

Which is to collect confusions and gently unravel them.

That's what you really pass on.

What do your kids take with them?

The worldly things that you give them or the love that you give them?

And what is the love that you give them other than your willingness to see things more clearly?

And then share that clarity with them.

That's what they take.

And that is such a present moment opportunity.

And then also,

The cycle will repeat itself where you will give them love,

But you will also give them confusion.

But again,

You're giving them opportunity.

Do you see?

In no way is it wrong.

It's just perfect.

You're not supposed to give them only love.

You're supposed to give them your humanity,

Which sets up the perfect lesson for them to work through.

And in this play and in this cycle,

There's simply no other option but to evolve.

Not evolve in the way where we have better buildings and technology,

But where there's more love,

More consciousness,

More clarity.

And it simply cannot go wrong.

And to see that it simply cannot go wrong brings us back to a gentle invitation to just trust.

And do the best that you can,

Which is what you're doing.

Which again,

For me,

What I see in this moment,

Invites the humility.

Right?

Especially with your children.

It's like,

Wow,

I'm doing the best that I can.

This is hard sometimes.

But underneath all of the difficulty,

Underneath me,

In appearance,

Getting it wrong,

What is profoundly obvious is that I love you.

And that's the core of it.

That's the heart of it.

Is yeah,

I get lost.

I lose my shit.

But something that is beyond doubt is I love you.

And if that is there,

If that is shared,

It doesn't matter how bad you think you messed it up.

They'll take that love with them.

And at some point they will see and they will forgive and realize,

Gosh,

I love you too.

You did the best you could.

Thank you.

Because that's what we've seen.

It's all forgiven and it's playing out exactly how it needs to play out.

And so be with a beautiful permission to tell your kids,

Sometimes I am a mess,

But I absolutely love you.

And what they hear is,

So you're telling me it's okay to be a mess sometimes?

Yeah.

And I love you anyway.

How obvious is it that this whole thing is about love?

My God.

The phrase God is love makes a lot of sense right now.

Reviews

Thank you, Tiger!
I love your way of reflecting thoughts and for me this mean to start thinking different and to reflect my own thoughts.
Happy to hear that it is okay to be human with all the mess that sometimes happens.
God is love, this is wonderful 🙏💕

And how about frustration with adult children…
I still haven’t figured that one out.
Namaste Tiger