How Do You Feel Toward Your Inner Critic?

Learn a simple Internal Family Systems (IFS) approach to working with your inner critic. In this short talk, explore how shifting from judgment to curiosity can help you develop greater self-compassion and understand the protective role your inner critic may be playing. Ideal for anyone interested in IFS, mindfulness, emotional healing, self-awareness, and transforming self-criticism into a more compassionate relationship with themselves.

Transcript

Many mindfulness practices teach us how to notice the inner critic. And create some distance from it. Internal Family Systems, Or IFS, Takes a different approach. Here on Insight Timer, You'll find many teachers who talk about the inner critic and how to work with it. I'd like to offer a next step in the process of engaging with the critic. Often, Practices invite us to notice the critic. Rather than become consumed by it. Over time, We learn that the critic is something we're experiencing. Not who we are. We begin to recognize these thoughts as automatic patterns of the mind. Rather than absolute truths. Teachers often encourage us to pause, Notice what's happening. And choose not to give our energy to these harsh and negative thought patterns. And that in and of itself is incredibly valuable. See if you'd be willing to take one more step with me. Once you've noticed the critic. And separated from it. I want you to become curious about something else. How do you feel toward the critic? I'll never forget an experience I had while driving home after dropping my daughter off at school without her rain jacket on a rainy day. As I drove, My inner critic was brutal. It was telling me what a terrible parent I was and how I should have known better. But once I separated from those thoughts and recognized that the critic wasn't actually me, Something unexpected happened. I felt tears well up in my eyes. Not because I agreed with the criticism. But because I felt compassion for this part of me that was working so hard. This is the perspective IFS offers. Rather than seeing the inner critic as merely a pattern of negative thoughts. IFS sees it as a part of us that is trying to protect us. Many inner critics are working hard to protect us from shame, Rejection, Embarrassment, Or disapproval. They criticize us first in the hope that we'll change our behavior and avoid getting hurt by others. The next time you notice your inner critic. See if you can do something different. Instead of trying to meditate it away through breathing or positive affirmations. Simply ask yourself. How do I feel toward this part of me? You may discover that beneath the criticism, Is a part that's been trying to protect you all along.

Reviews

Thank you for a simple reframing and example of working with the inner critic.