How To Ensure That Your Are Fearless In 2022

Fear limited my life, full stop. There's not much else to say. I go into detail during this recording. I also share how I have turned it into a superpower and I am now thriving with blissfulness (not every day! but often) The group that attended this session were full of life and we all left fired up and ready to smash the year! Enjoy. Write to me if you felt any energy whilst listening to this, I want to learn how the sessions impact you. It\s a blindspot, so my request is, would you feedback?

Transcript

So yeah,

New Year's Eve has always been this thing where I'm just questioning everything.

I'm just like,

What the hell am I doing with my life?

And historically that turned into depressive thoughts.

So I don't know about you guys,

You guys tell me,

Do you ever feel that way?

And I'm not saying this to like,

Bring you to that place now.

I guess it's just a way for me to,

Yeah,

Maybe introduce myself in a way,

But also introduce the session.

Because I always like to keep it real and say,

Hey,

Yeah,

I'm here to teach things and to speak about things.

But,

You know,

I've had some challenges.

That's really why I'm here.

That's why I do these sessions.

Because I'm suspecting there's people out there like me who also are going through challenges that I've been through,

That sometimes I might still be going through,

Right?

So yeah,

I like to keep it real with you guys.

So,

Oh,

Hey,

Marie,

Nice to see you.

Yeah,

And that's a great point that you put there.

Realizing I haven't achieved what I've wished for in my life.

That's it.

Does anyone else feel that way?

Or what comes up for you?

Here's my opening question before we start.

What comes up for you when you think of the end of the year?

Like what kind of thoughts come up,

Feelings come up?

Please share in the chat.

Because then I know how to work with you guys in this session,

Right?

And I'll tell you a bit more about my background as well.

But yeah,

Feel free to share.

Like what comes up for you when you're thinking the end of another year?

So,

Above Nicole has said,

Depressed and don't know why.

Yeah.

Liz says,

Physically tired.

Hmm.

Hey June.

Yeah,

Laurie-Anne says,

It's usually hard for me.

I focus more on what didn't happen.

Yeah.

A lot of guilt because you're closing down your business.

Okay,

Interesting.

Yeah.

Grieving at the same time.

Yeah,

There's this grief.

That's a great way to describe it.

There's this grieving of like,

It's like we get the year.

Imagine the year was in a liquid form,

In like a liquid jar.

It's like we get the year and we visualize it in this jar.

And we say,

Oh,

Okay,

This is what it looks like.

Let me look at this jar for a moment.

And it's like you'll look at it and then this murkiness will appear.

You'll start seeing some dirt in this liquid.

And then the more you start looking at it,

It's like,

Huh.

This isn't really what I wanted for this year.

Like,

What is this?

Because that's the way the mind works.

It analyzes stuff,

Right?

Analyzes the past really well.

That's why we can go into all these stories.

And that's why like things such as therapy are so popular.

Because we love to analyze the past.

We're so good at that because it's the known.

We think,

Awesome,

I can analyze my personality,

My fears.

I can analyze like these things that have happened.

Because we can do that.

Because it's there,

Ready for us.

It's an easy thing to do,

To analyze stuff.

We can say,

Okay,

Great,

Like this happened,

This happened and this happened.

So that means this.

That means this compared to now.

The future is where we get lost.

You know,

We're going into next year and there's this whole thing about the unknown.

I think that's what created a lot of tension for me.

It was using the past almost like you think about like race horses.

And you say,

Oh this was won a lot of times in the past.

But it had a bunch of losses in this way.

So I'm not going to bet on that race horse.

We're using the things that have happened in the past to project the future,

Right?

And then it's also unknown.

We can't actually,

We don't know what's going to happen.

That creates even more challenges.

So the first thing I want to point out is this thing called the unknown.

Even the word unknown,

What does that bring up for you?

Unknown,

When you think about that word.

Before I continue,

What does unknown bring up for you?

And in general,

What is it?

What thoughts come up when you think about next year?

Do you have any ideas or visions or things you want to achieve?

Or any fears or doubts or anything else that comes up when you think about next year?

And the unknown.

So sense of possibility and risk also says clear.

Yeah,

That's a great way of thinking about it.

Possibility and risk.

Excitement and anxiety.

That's interesting as well.

Very similar to what Claire said.

Anyone else?

What do you guys think?

Because there's no way you're not thinking about this.

There's no way that you're here the day before the near stars.

And there's not like some kind of thought coming up.

Of like,

Oh,

Another year.

Hmm.

Especially if you're in this session,

Right?

Some brings fear in some areas and some brings excitement.

Okay,

Interesting.

Yeah.

Curiosity and how Angela is to not resist but to go with the flow.

Hmm.

I like that.

Yeah.

Yeah,

Anything else?

Jolene says scared of boundaries that I need to set.

Okay,

Interesting.

Boundaries.

Yeah.

Typically unknown for me has always brought fear.

Now I'm committed to having a more positive approach and just flow with it.

Okay,

Interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah,

Because we can't grab this thing.

We can grab the past and analyze that and say,

Okay,

I'm this type of person.

I'm this type of personality type.

Let me fill in this online test that tells me who I am.

And we can work with that,

Right?

We can work with data and information about what we know.

Or what we think about ourselves.

But when it comes to the unknown and the future,

It's like,

Ah.

On one hand,

This could be like so much possibility.

So much could happen from here.

But on the other hand,

There's the mind analyzing of,

Okay,

What kind of risks and challenges are there?

So it's like this stretch between the two.

So I like to play in the area of possibility all the time.

Because you know why I,

Like I figured out why I had so much depression around New Year's.

And it was really because I knew that there was much more possible.

I wasn't really tapping into the potential of my existence.

That's what it really was.

It wasn't that I was depressed over nothing.

It was more around,

Well,

I know there's more possible with my life.

But I'm not doing it because I'm blocking myself off by thinking in fears.

And that continued for years.

And then I started really slowing down.

The way I live my life.

Slowing down to the speed of life itself.

You know,

Things can happen very fast or very slow.

Both.

You could change your life within a month.

There's been times I've had a conversation with someone for two hours or something like that.

And they've changed the way they see the world after two hours.

And they'll drop me a message a few months later saying,

That conversation,

It was like this.

My life was going this way.

And then boom,

It went somewhere else.

Because all it takes is an insight,

A revelation.

Some people call this things like awakening or whatever else you want to call this.

It just takes something to shift in how you think.

And then,

Not just that by the way,

Then some actions.

Because sometimes we do know what we do or we do know what life would be like if.

But there's the action part,

Which doesn't happen.

And that's also what it was for me.

So I started having all of these realizations and insights and waking up to what was possible.

I couldn't take action because I was so scared.

I was too scared to do what I really wanted to do.

Does anyone else feel that way?

Do you struggle with this action part?

Are you having these insights and you know what's possible?

You know what could be.

But there's this hesitation of,

Hmm,

Wow,

Yeah,

I've been having these thoughts for years.

I've never done anything about it.

Years and years sometimes.

Sometimes people say to me,

I've been this way for years,

Like eight years someone said to me the other day.

I said,

Okay,

How about we have a conversation about creating your,

Like the greatest year of your life?

And she said to me,

Yeah,

Let's do it.

I said to her,

So I'm a bit busy for the next few weeks.

How about we do it in the middle of January?

And she said,

I've been waiting eight years to make this change.

So now it's,

You know,

I'm okay to wait two weeks.

So sometimes we know,

We know everything that has to happen,

But the stuff gets in the way,

The thinking blocks us.

That was what was blocking me off.

Like I wanted to do so many things,

Like travel.

I wanted to become a personal trainer and I was sitting on both of those two things for so long.

I was in a relationship that I wasn't fully satisfied by.

I was just hanging around in the relationship.

I was like,

Oh yeah,

Something might change.

Yeah,

You know,

Just comfort.

There was this knowing that I wasn't fully satisfied.

Jobs,

The same with jobs.

Going and just doing it,

Like okay,

I'm just gonna continue with this job.

And I know there are financial things to think about,

Right?

Of course.

But there's always a possibility to find a new job or create something else in the background while you have your job.

I was under the belief that there wasn't options.

There wasn't options.

I was stuck with this,

Stuck in the relationship,

Stuck with my thinking and I labeled myself as having disorders,

Mental health disorders and all of that stuff,

Right?

Oh,

I have this disorder.

I can't.

I have chronic anxiety.

I find it really hard to make change in life.

So it's too much.

My body can't handle it.

I said,

I can't go and travel.

I can't open a business.

Like that's just not me.

I'm not that type of person.

So all the actions got blocked by barrier of thinking.

And it was only when I started realizing that I can create a life.

And I use the word create very consciously.

Because you think about it like whatever you're stuck with.

Imagine you had a piece of paper that said,

Okay this is my life.

You can grab a fresh sheet of paper and get some colorful pens out.

And you can design what does this change look like.

You can create.

And again I use the word create again because it's an artistic thing.

It's not artistic in the sense of,

Oh I'm an artist.

I'm a writer.

I'm a writer.

I'm a creative or I'm a painter.

Or I sketch or I make music.

Yeah,

Those are types of creation.

I'm talking about creation of anything you want.

Like you can create a new job.

You can create a business or a side business.

You can create calm.

And I'm going to touch on that for a second because people think I was calm.

I did this.

This was created like if you met me some years back you would have been like this guy just sweats for no reason.

And he's like stuttering in his words.

He doesn't know what he's saying.

I used to stutter and or just not speak because I was not confident enough to speak.

I just stayed quiet.

I would be quiet.

I'd be like hidden away in the world.

No one knew about me.

I didn't have a presence on social media and stuff.

I wasn't existing because for me being hidden away meant that I didn't have to face the risk of humiliation or maybe not even humiliation just just being seen.

Just being seen or not.

So I created all this stuff.

I had to create calm.

I created inspiration.

I created the way to tap into my creativity itself.

I created trips that I went on.

I created a different healthy body.

I was very skinny and I saw myself as weak.

I created that.

And then eventually I ate so much that I got overweight because I was like yeah I'm gonna get big.

I don't want to be skinny anymore.

I don't want to be the skinny guy.

I want to be the big massive guy.

And I ended up injuring my back so I got overweight because I couldn't work out anymore.

So I became overweight.

And with that I had to lose weight and create another way of being which was a person who's lost weight.

A bit healthy.

A person who understands what type of food to eat.

It's all a creation.

So here's what I invite you to do right now.

Write down three things that you would love to create next year.

And then share with me number one.

Number one.

And you don't have to think about how it how to do it or if it's possible right now.

It's just the creative process begins with okay what do you want to create?

And as soon as you put it out there and and actually write it in and then hit the send button there's probably going to be this part of you which is like doubting some of it.

Or maybe not.

Maybe not at all.

Maybe that's a projection from me.

Maybe you just type it in you're like yes I'm doing this.

This is what I'm doing next year.

I'm on it.

So share in the chat what is coming up for you.

What are you going to create next year?

One thing you have 12 months to do this.

You think about it like that you have 12 months you can create the most amazing body if that's what you want.

You can be the like the most healthy person in the world even if you're not like that at all right now.

You can create that.

You can write book like Laurieann said easily in a year.

You can start a business in a year for sure.

Easily you can start a successful business in a year I'd say.

Or at least get started on it.

You can change careers in a year.

You can become calm and peaceful in a year for sure.

You know people say things to me like yeah this is a this is a this is gonna take me a lifetime because it's always been like this.

It's gonna take me a lifetime to become more peaceful and calm or confident or be an action taker because it's you know I've struggled with this for a while.

I get that but I actually believe that whatever the challenge is is definitely possible to spend a year on it and see a huge change a hundred percent.

There's no way there's no way you can't actually.

There's no way you can't see a huge change if you're committing time to it.

You can find a new partner in a year.

You could be contacting me saying Raj you know I came to your session last year um something clicked inside and it's been a year and now I'm about to get married.

That could be happening in a year's time right when now you're thinking oh I'm alone I'm gonna be alone forever.

My life is misery.

It could be different in a year.

If you create that situation if you create whatever you want the job of a new job anything is possible.

So what would you like to create next year?

One thing.

I said three before now I'm saying one.

So we've got enjoyment from Sunny.

Enjoyment I love that.

That's a really great one to create.

The practice of coming home each day no matter what's happening externally.

I love that practice of coming home to yourself.

Becoming so Tomkins says become my authentic self in all realms of life.

I love that.

That's one of the most demanded things from most people to be there just express themselves and be themselves.

There's all these layers that and all this tension and all this like some of these acts and for me too by the way like these acts that are being put on I think that's why I struggle so much with my mind because I was trying to fit into everyone else's way of thinking ultimately and everyone else's way of thinking was seeping into me like stopping me from doing things.

So being yourself means you're in charge you're the boss.

No one's no one's gonna be able to stop that and you know here's another thing once you realize you're the boss and that no one's gonna come and save you that it's up to you something awakens massively because we've spent a lot of time being conditioned that we need approval and we need validation.

We need someone else to tell us what to do for it to be okay that we do it.

I'm not saying that's not useful sometimes but sometimes it turns against us and it becomes this thing of like feeling powerless.

Powerlessness stops the actions.

I said earlier we sometimes know the actions,

Sometimes we don't by the way.

Like we might have a big dream and we just think how the hell do I don't know what to do.

There's a strategy sometimes right?

It has to be a strategy.

It has to be some kind of like okay I wanted by the end of the year so someone said value of financial security.

Yeah if you want that by the end of the year you have to start figuring out okay what do I have to do to start moving towards that now.

What's the small steps?

The simple steps and you have to start doing and that's where the mind comes in and tries to stop us.

It's like oh what's the point?

This is this is this is irrational.

This is not possible.

What's the point of me trying?

This is not going to happen.

So we have to like tap into this power beyond that.

So let me see what else is coming up in the comments.

What else comes up for you guys?

I've been talking for a while.

Do you have any questions at this point?

Let's slow down and have a moment to reflect on everything that I've said that everyone else has said in the comments.

Now your feeling have a few moments to just be with it.

Notice how I am not speaking much.

To give you that space to reflect in silence.

Does silence feel uncomfortable sometimes?

I know it did for me.

I'm not going to see what's coming up for you.

Okay I want to come back to the comments.

Eva says being more disciplined with habits that lead to the growth and changes I desire.

Yeah that's a good one and by the way did anything come up for you in the silence?

How was that?

Not filling this space is tough for me.

Yeah sometimes I'll just stare at my clients.

I won't say a word if I know that something's going on in front of me.

I see like some insights.

I'll just sit in silence and let them be in that.

Because with the silence it's kind of like you get space to just reflect right?

Because we move so fast.

We move fast through everything.

We're rushing and we're searching.

We're searching for answers usually.

Or we're just thinking out loud and then we're thinking about the thinking.

So sometimes the space just allows us to pop in to the insight.

Let it seep in.

Slowing down was on your list Jolene.

Yeah I think it's a massive thing that helps so much because it doesn't matter who I'm working with right?

It doesn't matter like what goals,

Amazing huge goals,

Exciting goals they have.

It has to come from a slow down place.

I call it slow down to speed up because you really do speed up.

It's like when you're going on a corner or you're turning a corner you have to slow down to go around it.

You can't just like say oh no there's the corner let me just quickly shift.

It's reckless.

So slow down get around the corner and then speed up like a rocket ship you're gone.

Then it's action time.

It's time to light that fire and go.

So being disciplined with your habits Ava.

Yes slow down into them.

What are their habits?

What are the habits that are really gonna help?

Because I've found myself being in all sorts of habits everything that I could find and then I just find that is too much.

So figure out what are the habits that really help and then make a commitment.

I said to one of my clients yesterday I think it was.

Was it?

Yeah yesterday she said I want to make sure that once a week time to go into nature because I've got this craving or just like something that's gonna make me feel alive.

Because I'm just rushing around all day working busyness and I said make a commitment right now.

And I and she said okay sure yeah I'm in.

I said no no hold on.

I'm a person who has a strong bond to my word.

I said to her are you a person who really values your word?

I said yes for sure.

I already knew that about her right but just getting her to really just connect to her commitment.

I said can you commit to doing this no matter what happens?

No matter what?

And you don't break this bond.

You don't break your word.

And we went into a very deep spiritual connection in that moment.

Deep.

It wasn't just like okay commit to this.

No it was this is important.

I even got her to value this.

I said if you don't do this what will happen?

She's impacting her physical health.

She's not really performing well at work either because of this because she's not full of life.

Everything is getting messed up.

So the value of this thing which doesn't seem that important of connecting with nature and going out and sparking the creativity now is hiked.

It's very important now.

Health wise,

Relationship wise,

Work wise.

So I got her to commit.

Every week she will do this now and I have faith that she will.

If she doesn't then like that's not I'm not gonna say like oh no you didn't do this.

She's gonna feel it herself.

She's gonna know that she let herself down.

So she's very unlikely to not miss this because she now knows the value.

So with discipline I think discipline is very important.

That's the only way I've been able to create most of these changes by committing because like I said earlier we know what we want to do but we need some commitment.

And sometimes it helps when you have like someone in front of you who's holding that space and you're committing to them as like it's not about me at all.

I'm just facilitating this stuff happening no matter what.

Facilitating that commitment.

Because she knows if I ask her how's this going?

If she says she has to admit to me that she hasn't done what she said she would do,

It's way worse to say it to someone else than to just say it to yourself.

Or maybe not worse but it just adds to it.

So yeah that's a point Ava.

Commitment.

So what can you guys commit to?

That's my challenge.

What can you commit to?

It doesn't have to be a long commitment.

You can say I'm gonna commit to something for four weeks.

And you don't have to share this.

This is just something I'm I want to gently challenge you on to take away from this session.

What can you commit to?

No more messing around.

No more I would like to,

This would be nice,

Oh it would be great if I was healthier,

It would be great if I lost a few pounds,

It would be great if I had a better relationship,

It would be great if I had a new career.

Commit to doing something about it.

And don't screw up on that commitment and then you would guaranteed.

The way I like to say is it's not all about just the inner world.

I've been there where I've been extreme spiritual,

Extreme and I've said yeah,

Yeah I have to I have to work on my belief system and I have to reframe every single thing and I have to get over this trauma that I have then I can do this stuff that I want in life.

Then I can have the life I want.

So I better go sort this stuff out first and get with that and meditate for hours and read books for hours.

That's very important by the way,

I'm not knocking that.

It has to start from the inside,

It has to start from the inside.

But what I found is that there's this term people have been saying to me recently,

Some of my clients and random people they've said spiritual bypassing and I was like what do you mean like where do people get these terms from?

And then I got them to explain it and they said it's yeah when you just you just kind of like cut yourself off from the outside world by going into this spiritual mode.

Now I've come to this place after going very extreme in I know it's about a combination of insight and actions on the outside world doing real stuff not just working with the way you're thinking not just working with your your past and your the stuff that you've been through I think it has to be a combination of both and I for sure avoided the action and the external part because that's what brought up much more fears so I was like oh no I need to I need to work on my belief system first I need to work on my traumas first then I can go and do this stuff.

That's not always true,

It might be hard to hear it was I felt it was hard to hear but I don't think that's true you can create the life you want by taking action by doing stuff commitment whilst working on your inside world and being being a peaceful being at the same time.

Okay any questions any thoughts any insights I'm I'm pretty sure someone's having an insight right now I've got this sense I don't know what this sense is but I've just got this sense so I want to hear what is your insight so far what have you taken from this session and are there any follow-up questions because I'm gonna take questions now I'm not gonna do any more talking I'm gonna hear some questions well I am gonna do some talking but I want them to be around your questions next 20 minutes or so so fire some questions in.

Okay so there's one there from LK says it's hard to live with authenticity when we experience the imposter syndrome yeah imposter syndrome is huge I felt that for sure and yeah it is very challenging what I usually say to people is we don't need to work on taking imposter syndrome away I encourage people to lean into imposter syndrome lean into this thing of freaking out feeling like you're not you know you're an imposter lean into it it probably says that something is something great is happening in your life and if you don't feel like an imposter then what are you just comfortable what what's the other end of it just what is it because it depends on the situation if your imposter syndrome is coming up from you being in a position that you don't feel you can do then I think that's great that means there's some learning going on I'd say lean into it the challenges always appear when we're like thinking this is a bad thing it's the judgment against this this imposter syndrome is it feels very nice how do I get rid of it it's down to perspective right for example for example for example you could be driving your car let's say you just started driving and I know I used to feel anxious about driving by the way you could be driving and say I can't do this like I'm not the type of person that can drive this is this is too difficult I can't drive on the highway or the motorway that's scary that was me by the way I couldn't drive on I didn't want to drive on these roads because I felt scary or you can say it feels scary to drive on these roads but that's what's exciting about it that's what is bringing up this fear and this doubt inside me so that's what comes up for me leaning into imposter syndrome leaning into it like is a you're about to go on a roller coaster or you're about to do a bungee jump and you think oh oh my god like what if I die but then at the same time you're excited course is going to feel scary if you're an imposter great I feel like that sometimes too but it tells me that I'm doing something exciting so if you want to have a chat about this drop me a message um lk I'd love to I want to hear more about the context around this whenever I hear imposter syndrome I always want to hear like it excites me in a way to hear about like what the story is behind it what is what's happening in your life that brings that up so feel free to send me a message I'd love to have a conversation um any other questions guys make the fear fun yes exactly Sonia says I feel guilty for taking a break from work I have to keep telling myself it's okay and I need it yeah interesting do you work for yourself Sonia are you um self-employed because that's what I'm suspecting based on what you said and for me similar um yeah it's a challenging one like this past week I've been really slowing down and not looking at my phone as much but some things still light me up with what I do right so sending a voice note to a client or something or to someone or sending people things that might be useful that feels okay that lights me up so I'd say a break is super important but let yourself assess what that means to you sometimes sometimes it's great to take a complete like reset I call it the 72 hour fast um because day one Sonia you'll be still tempted to like check your phone and look at stuff you'll be still like looking over your shoulder just in case day two you'll still have it in the back of your mind like uh maybe like yeah I could check what's going on maybe I could do some work it'll be useful if I did a bit of work but at the same time you're having fun with your break by the time you get to day three you're free you're just reset you're you're shifted away and when you do come back you come back with this sense of excitement with this like okay yeah I'm I'm ready again to start another thing that could be useful um to anyone that's finding work challenging is is to think about creating days off if you're self-employed especially like specific days that you have off just as if you were work someone else right so yeah you have to you have to create those those spaces and I I know I find it challenging as well Sonia so yeah feel free to drop me a message as well I want to hear more about your your life and how how these challenges are showing up for you it sounds super interesting and I want to hear more about what you do as well to be to be working like the day before new year's eve must be something interesting so any other questions guys what else comes up for you if you've been here from the beginning what's been your one big insight so far because it's it's a decent amount of time to be in a to watch something on your phone right 54 minutes sometimes I'd tune out unless it's I'm engaged with something so what have you found most useful so far before we end and what's one thing you learn more about put that in the comments before we finish there's something you want to learn more about I've got like a bunch of resources that I can send you guys in individually based on your needs or your challenge or your desire or your goal I spent a few months just recording videos on topics 30 minutes just recording videos answering big questions about life and even now I write a lot as well so I make articles on topics today I made one on it's called into the darkness and it's talking about embracing this stillness this darkness whatever you're feeling how they say something out of it so if you want to know more about that article or other articles I've got one which is about it's called five ways to challenge overthinking and it's yeah again based on my experiences what have I done what's helped me most to become who I am now there's five things in there and it includes things like the physical body as well um because once you work on the body with the mind you drop weight without trying so hard I was running around like I was literally running around on the streets trying to be in shape but there was so much tension on the inside that it was impossible for the body to be in weight condition tension from the mind just yeah it creates tension in the body right so yeah this article I've got if you want it um it talks about food movement it talks about some habits some stories as well and yeah I just spent a while creating a bunch of these things because I get similar questions um all the time so I just send people these things that would help and what else okay what else come up oh check me out on instagram as well my tag is raj gorsea um and every day I I usually walk on the streets going on my walk and I take a short video talking about something that's come up from me from clients I'm working with just anything that's I think would be helpful for people and there's also a bunch of yeah there's a bunch of stuff on there like book recommendations I've written like a hundred book recommendations on my instagram page there's mini series there's there's all sorts of stuff quotes quotes and diagrams and stuff that I've made because I'm I can be logical as well so raj gorsea check me out there and drop me a message there let's connect let's say hello tell me what you got from today's session tell me what is exciting about your new year I want to hear it I want to see what kind of people are around and yeah just have a interesting conversation that's my invitation I like to call it an invitation because it's like some people would message me saying I wasn't sure if it was okay to send you a message so there's an invite right there like you were knocking on my door all right let me see what else is in the comments before we finish yes natalie says how powerful it is to be reminded we are not alone yeah and how powerful vulnerability is yeah yeah I like to just tell it how it is you know I I'm I've been through the challenges that everyone's been through with everything um I've just had to learn and expand myself to overcome some of them and I still have some challenges by the way I'm not like a complete or enlightened being I've just advanced in my process right that's all I've just it's just happened because I've I've made it happen I've created it so yeah I like to tell stories and say where I've been and what's happened and all of that because I know it can be helpful um how long did it take you to shift towards action says ditty yeah that's an interesting question because I'm not sure how long did it take it was just taking small actions let's just say just taking small actions and I don't think there's a specific length it's just it becoming a practice you know more and more these days but it just started with like I'm gonna do this thing that I'm scared of doing I know that I'm scared of doing my mind is telling me no but something inside is telling me yes I'm gonna listen to that voice so it's just become a practice of listening to it um yeah hope that helps taking action and working on inner growth exactly the inner and the outer world can't just you can't just sit around all day inside your own world you know I've realized that now you know I realize um it's about a combination can't just say I'm gonna work on this inner world and then then everything will be okay yeah they like 100% is important 100% but it has to be a it has to be unified with the outer world then you really feel alive you feel alive and that's what we want right to feel alive feel alive and have peace knowing that we're living our lives that's it and it's not as difficult as you think I'll tell you that I think I'll leave it there and if you want to have a conversation like I said invitation I want to talk to some interesting people in the start of the year and see if any of you guys want to start making these changes you want to start making them I'll send you some stuff that will help we'll have a conversation and I'll talk to you about how I'm helping people get into this mode and create this stuff that they want I'll I'll be happy to help so let me know and if you do want to work with me as your coach your mentor then drop me a message around that too again same thing we just have a conversation see what you want to do see what you're challenged by what's in your way and get past that and I have unshakable belief that it will happen all right last thing yeah check in the comments so Nikki says I've been struggling almost one year and still not quite recovering and can't seem to get out of my out of that stage yeah depends what recovering what you mean by recovering um what is the trick and motivate to do it yeah I'm not sure if I can answer that directly I've probably got to hear a bit more about what you're challenged by instead of like me just giving some kind of generic answer which probably won't serve you so yeah drop me a message Nikki and I'll you know tell me a bit more about it and I'll see if I can help you if you've been struggling for over a year yeah it's time it's time it's time for that change to happen and it's gonna happen right now it's just uh it's just a process and it can happen I don't think there's a trick but it can happen much easier than you think um last thing is yeah you guys are really active today it's awesome so Claudia says I want to be fearless in decision making fear has been so deep rooted that I don't take risks and my decision making is very safe yeah that's a great one that's been me um not taking risks and you know like sometimes it's okay I think ultimately is knowing yourself and how you work how you are but then also stretching that stretching the boundaries because you know that if you did something that was risky you would feel so excited about it it'll be fun for you you'll be like oh my god look I'm doing it so um yeah those fears are there but there is definitely something around it it's a commitment like I said if I was to challenge you like let's just say you had you wanted to do something right I don't know what it could be and we could talk about that if you want but if I was to give you a clear challenge and you accepted it and you committed to it it would happen it would happen and we wouldn't make it so big like you have to go and go outside of the comfort zone so far out the way I like to work is to step on the edge of the comfort zone so find a space where you you can make small you can do small things first and then you will you will do whatever you want to do after that it's a process so yeah I would I would challenge you if you want to have a conversation I'll give you a challenge right now that might help you so feel free to drop me a note um cloudia okay last one I think I'm gonna have a look is there any other comments Heidi says she wants to raise sheep for wool that's awesome do it go for it that can happen you just got to figure out how to do it right um Angie says um yeah it when a person becomes too busy so much tension can happen because there's like this belief that if we do all of these things we're going to have what we want sometimes it's true but there still has to be this balance in place I have to commit myself to days off where I don't look at my phone because I get a lot of messages sometimes right and I'm on social media making content all of that stuff but I just I just make rules okay I'm not on my phone today have to I have to get away from it otherwise I'll lose my mind but then sometimes I'm I don't need that rule at all sometimes I'm okay so it's kind of just checking in with yourself like your energy levels are they starting to burn out when they get close to that go and take a break it's gonna help all right last comment Pamela says I've just started online dating after 25 years well done awesome um and oh after 25 years of of being married okay awesome yeah and two dates next week any suggestions on how not to be afraid and be myself I love that I'm very excited for you Pamela yeah so I don't have any specific suggestions all I would say is check in with why you wanted to go on the dates in the first place what is it about this person put the attention on them what is it about that person so when you actually go and see them become curious about them like they're an alien just become like super curious about them make it about them then it's not about you yeah of course you want to talk about it as well but if you get out of that frame of it's all about me and you make it into a we that's one of the distinctions I teach to everyone it's going from me to we in every situation then you're probably gonna have fun and if you don't okay great you learn something about like with what type of people you don't like to date or something about yourself so enjoy Pamela have fun and let me know how it goes I want to hear what it feels like to go from 25 years of marriage to going on dating sounds really exciting actually I'd love to hear how your date went all right awesome guys hope that was useful Pamela all right I think I want to close it there if that's all good for you guys the new year is soon so just to end think about what you have right now think about what has gone well this year and then think about what hasn't gone well but not from this judgy place of like look at you you messed up you can use that language if you're doing it in a constructive and nurturing way right you can say yeah Raj you messed up man you could have done better but owning it owning that you messed up owning that you could have done better and then ask yourself what do I want to create next year and then finally what do I feel is in my what's in my way in creating that and that's it then you know you're ready you're ready to go you got some questions that are gonna tune you in and you're excited about the next year too awesome guys yeah and I will speak to some of you guys soon enjoy your new years have fun stay blessed stay happy and just be just be you no one else be you sending you love