Spiritual Awakenings

In episode 40, we’ll share our experiences with spiritual awakenings. They look different for each of us, which means they’ll be unique for you. It can feel unnerving to suddenly realize that making sense of spirituality is up to us. But isn’t it also kinda cool? It means that your spiritual journey is specially tailored to your unique sensitivities, sense of humor, and personal understanding. Join in as we share about how we developed these relationships and the tools that helped along the way.

Transcript

Thanks for joining us here on Pretty Spiritual where we're attempting the unthinkable about how to navigate this messy,

Beautiful,

Imperfect life with spiritual tools,

Principles,

And our own personal stories.

So we're not experts,

We're not religious,

We're definitely silly.

We're honest,

Real,

And willing to share.

So join us as we connect,

Bond,

And grow together.

Hey everybody,

We're so excited we're here.

I'm Annie,

To my left is Lindsay Poney.

Hi everyone.

And our fabulous Ella.

Hello.

And we are excited today because we're going to talk about spiritual awakenings.

I'm already worried.

I'm confused.

Oh,

Oh.

I'm so confused I can tell that I know nothing about this.

So what is a spiritual awakening?

Is there any one definition?

When we say that word or when you read it on the podcast episode,

What came to your mind?

We just wanted to use this topic to explore the concept.

So to get technical,

The dictionary definition of what an awakening was.

And this is from Merriam-Webster and it's a coming into awareness,

Arousing from inactivity or indifference or a revival of interest in something,

Like especially around religious or spiritual matters.

And in my mind,

An awakening is different from a spiritual experience,

Although they really seem to dovetail and weave together.

So a spiritual experience,

Like the word experience is a description of an actual observation or participation in an event.

And so it's like a moment in time where we can relate to something.

And then awakening,

I love that coming into awareness.

And it can be an instantaneous thing.

Sometimes it's this soft,

Slow,

Gentle shift over time.

So this episode is going to explore that sweet state of coming out of sleep and coming into awareness of ourselves as spiritual in nature.

So ladies,

That just explains so much.

Let's talk.

Please share what the idea of a spiritual awakening means to you and what experience or experiences you've had with a spiritual awakening in your life.

Ella?

Yay.

Thanks for this topic,

Annie.

I'm so excited.

When I first heard the term spiritual awakening,

I felt really intimidated.

I was like,

Whatever that is does not apply to me.

Trumpets,

Golden light.

Yeah,

Like a burning bush and angelic fanfare.

And since I had never seen those things before in my life,

I guess that realm doesn't apply to me.

I didn't think that I could have a quote unquote spiritual awakening.

The way I think about spiritual awakening is a change in perspective or attitude.

And the way I think about spiritual experience is almost all of my life.

I forget that all the time,

And I'm going to talk a little bit more about that right now.

But I'm someone who gets really confused about how the spiritual and material worlds interact with each other.

So what I really need help with is bringing these lofty spiritual ideas into my day-to-day human life.

Most often for me,

The meat of a spiritual awakening has to do with contacting and practicing spiritual actions or principles in the human realm.

So if I'm living my life in this way that is full of spiritual actions that are taking place in my very human life,

That's really easy for me to think about as spiritual experience.

And when those spiritual experiences,

That like activities of my daily life,

Which are inspired hopefully by principles,

By loftier kind of ideas or goals or intentions,

Then my whole life can be this realm of spiritual experience.

And the shifts that those actions cause in my attitude can be spiritual awakenings.

In Buddhism,

There's a way of relating to the spiritual and material realms.

And this has been a helpful thing for me to think about.

And the language that I've heard most often is ultimate reality,

Which is like no self,

No duality,

Like everything is one.

And conventional reality,

Which is like I am Ella,

This is a podcast,

Those are separate beings from me.

It's helpful to be aware of that distinction because at the heart of it,

Yeah,

There's no unchanging permanent self.

While I'm like,

Yes,

That's true.

Actually,

The world that I live in on a day to day basis is full of these conventional interactions.

And I don't think that life would work very well for me if I was the IRS for like,

It's time for your taxes.

And I was like,

You guys,

There is no one,

There's no Ella though.

So I don't have anything for you.

You know,

Like I don't think I don't think that would work.

What this brings my attention to is that I used to think since humans are gross and messy and unpredictable and spiritual principles are clean and perfect and all this stuff that ultimate was quote unquote better than conventional.

And in Buddhism,

Actually in Mahayana Buddhism,

There's this really big warning against doing that.

It's like both are equally real and unreal.

It's like setting,

Even calling them separate things is already setting up this duality,

You know,

It's there's so one isn't better and one isn't worse.

And we need a way to talk about it.

So duality is already part of the equation.

And all this to say that what helps me make the most sense of spiritual awakenings is to bring them out of this ultimate realm only and start to look at what happens when I apply spiritual principles or the principles of this kind of ultimate reality in my daily mundane life.

And then all of a sudden spirituality is happening all around me in my very human life.

Whatever I think of as God or holy,

All of a sudden is all around me in the human plane.

Thank you,

Ella.

Solved it.

So sweet.

Done.

Wow.

Pony,

What about you?

What's been your experiences?

I was so intimidated,

I was like really excited.

Of course,

Very excitable.

And then I was really intimidated to even talk about this.

And I started in being like,

Oh,

Have I even had a spiritual awakening?

Like what,

What is this?

I loved Ella,

What you talked about just in asking the questions,

In what ways have I changed in attitudes and behavior.

And that really helped me to kind of get going on this.

It's so funny because for some reason,

I feel like I'm supposed to have the answer for everyone when really I just want the answer for myself.

And so I looked up some stuff and it talked about spiritual awakenings and how it's a paradigm shift that reconfigures the way we experience everything.

And I thought of a spiritual awakening,

I would know or understand things when in actuality awakening entails that we lose something.

Specifically,

My deeply conditioned beliefs about who I was and what I thought the world was.

Just like Ella,

I called you one day and you helped me so much by bringing up the conventional world and the ultimate reality.

Just how that's so helpful for me to put into context this life that I'm trying to make sense of.

So waking up out of a dream and seeing clearly without my conditioned mind,

Being able to challenge my thoughts,

Those are definite really big shifts and have been a big spiritual awakening for me just to see a thought and challenge it and be like,

Really though?

Before I was just running,

Running,

Running on whatever my mind brought up,

Whatever great next idea it had to do and that really got me,

That really kept me asleep.

So awakening isn't so much of an experience or a state of mind,

It's simply being in touch with what is already true moment to moment and then acting from that place.

In the past for me,

What that looked like that I couldn't see.

So I couldn't see the moment to moment truth of where I was acting out of what that looked like.

And now I'm able to look back and see that for so long I believed that the world was out to get me.

This is ways that my attitude and behaviors have changed and so this has been my spiritual quote unquote awakening and it's just as simple as this.

The world was out to get me and I couldn't trust anyone,

I couldn't trust myself.

I needed to harden my heart and take an aggressive stance towards everything,

Especially the people who love me.

It's so subtle.

It's so nuanced.

I would never think that this is a higher consciousness or a quote unquote spiritual awakening but to see the way that I was living before,

That that was my truth,

That was my reality and then to see the realities that I made from that space of being hardened and trying to protect myself and closing myself to everyone and the reality that that created and how asleep I was acting from that place and then today to be able to look around and choose and have this moment to moment truth of what's here,

What am I acting from and getting to interact with this world in a completely different way than I ever could.

I get moment to moment spiritual awakenings with that on the daily right now and it's really,

Really life changing for me.

So thank you.

Thank you,

Pony.

Thank you,

Pony.

In my mind,

I love that we're talking about what this means too and there isn't any one right way to think about this.

So if how like the definition I provided of an awakening or spiritual awakening doesn't jive with you,

That's okay.

However you define it is wonderful.

So in my mind,

Spirituality is the space that I can connect to or draw from that's not material or intellectual and so before this journey that I'm on,

I wasn't awake to that part of myself.

I was only paying attention to things I could see and touch or the things that I could kind of process in my brain.

So starting on the spiritual journey began when I stopped drinking alcohol and my party life was a major impediment to any kind of bigger connection and so before that,

The only time I considered my place in an inner related cosmos or kind of spiritual realm was if I was on mushrooms.

And I was like,

Stairway to heaven,

Baby.

And I could in that time and I could feel a sense of greater connection but it was really finite and it didn't apply in the rest of my life.

Like once that experience was over,

That was done.

I didn't think or make choices or remember.

So I was just really involved in the day to day work of me,

My feelings,

My fears,

My desires and that spiritual part I was shut off from it because also it's really vulnerable and I didn't know how to tap into it.

So spiritual awakening for me has been a very,

Very slow process of coming awake to understanding myself as a spiritual person and feeling this,

Like I envision it like this jewel of connection inside of me and it's kind of like this shining thing in the center of my chest and the courage to nurture it is part of this awakening and also coming awake to how that kind of shining part of me is plugged into those around me,

Like the environment that I inhabit and then whatever I can see my higher power to be.

So shifting from the super Annie centered way of thinking about the world to more of this how I'm plugged in with everyone.

And all of this started with these really uncomfortable attempts and forays into meditation and then eventually adding in prayer too.

So now after more than eight and a half years on this path,

What a spiritual awakening is like in my world is presence,

Like being right here,

Which takes practice all the time,

But I can see how it's changed.

I've gotten better at being present the more that I practice.

A connection to my greater community,

A genuine interest in other people and a desire to be of service and that's like a really big one for me,

Which is not something that was interesting or yeah,

Let's just say it was not interesting to me.

You're not interesting people.

I do not care to be of service.

Can you be more interesting so I'm not bored all the time?

Say something funny right now.

And hope and also seeking to line up with my higher power.

So this kind of waking up to this fact that my life is not all about me is I guess the baseline of this entire concept for me of what a spiritual awakening is.

And my purpose is greater than satisfying myself and having often,

I'm going to put quotes around often because it's not all the time,

An honest desire to live in service to that idea,

Right?

But my purpose isn't to satisfy myself and actually my purpose is to tune in to my higher power and to be a service to other people.

So that's the hope.

It changes and it grows.

So it's like this softening with me as opposed to,

Oh,

I woke up and now everything's so clear.

You know,

It just kind of keeps shifting and changing and that's that.

So let's talk about some tools.

Yay.

What tools or approaches have you two experimented with when it comes to noticing or embracing a spiritual awakening in your life?

Ella?

Ooh.

Ooh.

Like I was talking about,

It helps me to think about my life as all the parts of it are spiritual experience.

Even forgetting about spirituality is part of a spiritual experience and actually a really necessary and sustaining one for me.

And I was talking in our last episode about jealousy,

How I've been noticing these small but important ways that I pull for rescuing or saving with my partner.

And it's when I feel scared or not enough or I'm uncertain that I'll look for this kind of rescuing from my own feelings,

From the uncertainty that's always part of life.

And then I'll do this by like really reading into tone or wording more than is helpful and having these pretty dramatic mood shifts and changes based around what I think I'm hearing or seeing.

And so I'm just going to talk about this concrete example.

So for me,

A spiritual awakening around this behavior comes because first I'm reminded of these kind of ultimate spiritual principles,

Which are no one ever rescues anyone else.

The only essence that rescues is this higher power,

Is the love of the universe.

And no person is going to be able to rescue me,

Especially not my partner.

And it's not his job to rescue me.

And I'm actually hurting both of us when I pretend that it is his job to rescue me.

So I'll remember this,

And then I'll have this awareness and I'll inquire how can I translate this kind of ultimate reality into my day to day life,

Into the spiritual experience of interacting with my partner,

Myself.

And so spiritual action is I rescue myself.

Spiritual action is I put my effort and the fullness of my being into the very full and satisfying life that I have outside of my relationship.

And I love my partner and I love our relationship.

And if it went away,

I would still have a totally full satisfying life.

It's like the icing on top.

And if I took it away,

It's like,

Yeah,

There would be something that wasn't there anymore,

But it would still be a totally edible cake,

Probably pretty delicious,

Even without frosting.

And so I focus on what sustains me and helps me feel lifted up and like a woman of integrity.

I translate this ultimate into conventional and I'm like,

What could I do right now that would help me feel like this?

And so I'm getting into action.

And once I get into spiritual action,

Then I'm free to experience the changes and feeling in perspective that almost always accompany spiritual action for me.

And I think of those changes,

Like I was saying,

As a spiritual awakening.

And almost always when I change how I'm acting,

How I'm thinking changes.

And it's not right away.

But that thing we can't think ourselves into right action,

But we can act our way into right thinking is really true for me.

And so with this particular part of my life,

I do that by asking myself questions that help me orient around what kind of spiritual action would be appropriate or what spiritual action could look like.

Because often I'm confused about the quote unquote right thing to do,

You know.

And so these are I apologize in advance,

These are going to be uncomfortable.

I ask myself,

What is the action that would require the most faith?

I ask myself,

What is the most vulnerable or ego unmasking action I could take?

And then this one is the worst one.

What is the hardest thing to do right now?

What's the thing that I want to avoid at all costs?

And then I do that.

Surprise!

It's a trick.

It's a trap.

It's a trap.

Just kidding.

It's great.

Anyway,

So those.

That's how I feel and what I think,

Apparently.

Thank you,

Ella.

I love those tools.

New episode,

Spiritual traps.

Spiritual booby traps.

Coming up.

We've been laying them this whole time.

Gotcha!

How about you,

Miss Pony?

Oh,

Well,

The best part I think about a spiritual awakening or higher consciousness is that there's no direct tool that's just going to how to have a spiritual awakening in five days.

Just take this pill.

Coming right up.

Whatever that is,

I would buy it.

The great news is,

Is that for me in my experience,

There hasn't been like one tool or one exact thing that was going to get me to have a spiritual awakening.

I really liked the questions,

Ella,

That you were asking because just as you were saying,

Those questions are really calling to you to wake up and to wake up to things that you probably want to be asleep to in a way.

And that's really understandable.

It's really.

Living is really hard.

It feels really uncomfortable a lot of the time.

It makes so much sense why our culture,

We are distracted,

Drunk and angry.

It's really painful to choose to be here in our most vulnerable states.

And even if it's just one minute of breathing into this moment,

Fully,

Wholly and accepting of what is here,

That is a higher state of consciousness.

And that can be enough.

The idea that we're going to get into a spiritual awakening and be a quote unquote woke is a tall order.

So what I wrote down for this quote unquote tool is for me and in my experience,

It's been all of the parts of my life combined.

Five years ago,

Seven years ago,

Especially 15 years ago,

I was so much more asleep.

I didn't even want to be awake to be perfectly honest.

And it's been a really beautiful unraveling,

Unfurling,

Opening,

Choosing to look towards waking up today in whatever capacity that can be.

Some of this stuff is too much.

It's too painful and today is not the day for me to wake up to that.

And I can honor this really sacred space of being here right now just as I am.

The ideas of if you just need your spiritual awakening right here,

Right now,

Patience.

For me,

It's really taken time,

Attention,

Acceptance and energy over my lifetime.

Sweet pony.

Thank you,

Pony.

Thank you both of you for sharing.

And with this topic and just everything that we're sharing,

Just the start of us explaining what our experiences have been and how we've gotten here and what it looks like,

Because it's hard to describe.

It's like this nebulous thing almost for me at least to put into words like pony you were saying of this lifetime experience of how it's looked and it's so gradual.

There's a man I know and he used to always say,

If you have a spiritual awakening,

Stay awake.

Because it's not this thing that I get and then it's one and done.

It's like a continued practice to stay in that space to make a really easy analogy.

It's like fitness.

I don't get into shape to run a half marathon and then I can do that half marathon for the rest of my life.

I have to keep my lung capacity up and I have to keep stretching and keep eating well so that my body's ready to do that stuff over time.

Staying in that place and I heard both of you say this,

One of the tools is action.

And it's just meditation,

Both guided and silent are really excellent tools for me to quieting my mind and becoming open and awake to the spiritual connection and spiritual nature inside of me.

And when I first started on this journey,

Meditation was the path that really helped get me there because I would hear people talk about their relationship with spirituality and what it looked like to them.

And the thing that I heard a lot was that they use prayer and meditation.

And at that point,

Prayer sounded really unappealing to me,

But meditation seemed really accessible.

And so I would just set a timer for three minutes,

Maybe sometimes one minute and just try it.

And it was these really stumbling,

Super uncomfortable efforts.

But it was this attempt to make space in my brain to shift and allow something in that wasn't just those experiences that I'd had prior that were either like tangible material world or like intellectual processes.

And so I was trying to use this gentle crowbar of meditation.

A gentle crowbar.

To make some room inside my brain for something besides things that I already understood or felt I could wrap my head around.

And it was helpful for me to use guided meditation and silent meditation because it's like ideas that other people could provide me with the guided meditation and then silent meditation just experiment with what does it look like to make some room.

I heard both you girls share this and I just will reiterate,

It's really hard for me to think my way into coming awake to something because I'm like using tools or thought processes that I already have to try to get something that I don't have.

And so I can act my way there through prayer,

Through meditation,

Through being of service to other people,

Through active gratitude.

And I know the word prayer is really triggering for a lot of people.

And so if when I say that word,

You're just like,

Oh,

I encourage you to check out our episode that we have called How to Pray.

And we really just talk about how it doesn't have to be associated with a specific religion and more it can be a spiritual tool that can help with spiritual awakening and opening.

Gentle crowbar.

Hashtag Gentle Crowbar.

There's have you guys ever heard the Albert Einstein quote where he says something like we can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking that we used when we created them.

And it's like,

It doesn't mean we don't have the capacity to use our brains to like orient toward a solution.

It's just a totally different arena.

That's right.

And we have to open to this really other way of relating if we want to find the solution.

Let in the unknown.

Turns out he was a genius.

No big deal.

Okay.

He rode a bicycle.

Everybody think about that.

So just my last parts of this tool is I want to acknowledge that being awake,

Like Pony was talking about,

It takes a lot of courage because a lot of the times when we're shut off,

Cut off,

Using stuff to cover up and disconnected from that spiritual,

Like open hearted part of ourself,

It's because there's something that we're scared of or we've had some really bad experiences.

And when I don't know how to move forward or when it's too hard to face stuff,

Prayer for me has become a tool to get courage that I don't have.

So if I want to get access to,

I don't even quite know how to say what I want to say,

But experiment with prayer,

I guess is what I'm saying.

And if it seems scary and if opening your heart to and your spirit to some outward inward connection seems terrifying,

Play with prayer and just see what happens.

And from whatever you're praying to or whatever you're praying with,

Ask for courage and just do it over time.

And then just know that this all may happen in layers.

It has and does for me.

It is this really slow,

Gentle erosion of like the hard rock of my what I think is fabulous intellectual capacity.

And it's wearing that down and easing in this room for this way of connecting and being and understanding that it doesn't always make sense to me,

But there's this awakening to it.

So that's my tool and I love you guys.

We love you all so much.

What a sweet one.

We want to hear what it looks like for you,

What spiritual awakenings have looked like and things that you do that have brought some openness and awakening in your life.

You can find us at PrettySpiritualPodcast.

Com.

We have a get in touch tab.

We've got tools on our resources page for meditations and prayers.

Our episode how to pray is on our website.

What else?

It's all there.

It's all right there.

It's basically.

For immediate awakening.

Go to our website.

It's the secret recipe for immediate awakening.

What are we going to talk about next week?

Emotional regulation.

We can't wait.

We cannot wait.

We love you.

See you soon.

Bye.

Bye.

Reviews

Awesome.. I really needed this talk

Thank the Goddess for this episode! So, I am AWAKE! These episodes are helping me to stay awake everyday! Paradigm shifting, observing my thoughts/feelings and what sustains me, reminding myself that I am GREAT on my own... I am enough ❤️
Spiritual booby traps... I’m dying! 🤣🤣🤣
Meditation was the start for me, this podcast is feeding my personal growth and giving me such great tools and inspiration and just everything! Thank you girls so much! I am so grateful for you! 🙏😘