Hello,
This is Lori Mihalik Levin of Mindful Return,
And I'm here to share some thoughts with you today about the practice of setting daily intentions—what they are,
What my system is for setting them,
And even some thoughts on why you should bother setting an intention.
In the chaotic early days of my own working parent journey,
When my two boys were very,
Very little and were not sleeping very much,
Someone suggested to me that I set an intention for my day.
She was certainly well-meaning,
And I was clearly and obviously floundering,
And I probably,
Secretly rolled my eyes at her suggestion.
But I felt like I had nothing to lose,
So I agreed to give this silly-seeming idea a try.
It seemed like a light lift.
It didn't cost anything,
And just as importantly,
It didn't seem to take much time.
So I committed to setting an intention for my day each morning.
Well,
In theory I did,
Because each day I promptly forgot that I had agreed to do so.
Such was my blurred state as a sleep-deprived parent who was just trying to keep the family train from flying wildly off of its track.
By 6 or 7 pm every evening,
I'd be beating myself with,
Oh,
I was supposed to set an intention and now the day is practically over.
Really helpful practice,
That is.
I was determined,
However,
To find a way not to forget.
So I put in place a few systems to help me remember to set this daily intention.
And the earnest effort did pay off.
Now nearly 8 years later,
I'm still setting an intention in the mornings.
Every single morning?
No.
Most mornings?
Yes.
So what is my intention-setting system?
Well,
I did two specific things to help myself remember.
First,
I coupled the intention-setting with something that I did on a daily basis anyway.
And the habit-forming literature says that it's a heck of a lot easier to add an element to an established routine than it is to create a new routine entirely.
Given that I had to,
Or rather for the benefit of my then-in-person colleagues I decided to,
Shower every morning,
I decided to multitask my shower.
I decided I would couple a moment of calm with a daily task.
Second,
I came up with an acronym to use while I was in the shower to help me remember to set this intention.
The acronym I decided to use was ISS.
It sounds like is,
A form of to be,
And it stands for intention,
Stretch,
And savor.
Set an intention for the day.
Do a few yoga stretches.
And savor the hot water from the shower and a few moments alone with no small person attached to me.
So my instruction for you is to pick an activity that you already do every morning and decide to set an intention for your day while you are doing that activity.
Okay,
So the next question is what exactly is my intention for the day?
Play along with me for a moment.
Let's pretend you decided to give this intention setting thing a try.
You even picked an activity that you're going to couple it with so you remembered to do it.
Now what?
What on earth is this so-called intention that you are setting?
Great question.
Every day mine is different.
And through various seasons of my life,
The nature of my daily intentions has been different too.
In the very early days of working parenthood,
My intentions often veered toward a commitment to letting go of something.
Often that something was others' expectations of me or to doing something healthy for myself.
For example,
One of my favorites is to start my day with a reminder that comparison is the thief of joy at the top of my mind.
Remember that you are enough today,
Mama,
Was also a frequent one,
As was my intention is to go to bed at 9 p.
M.
Tonight no matter how many bottles and pump parts are still in the sink.
Over time,
My intentions have shifted.
Go outside today was a frequent refrain during the early lockdown days of the pandemic.
Be patient with your children was necessary during the 15 months of remote school with two elementary schoolers.
And remember that you are loved is an intention that never gets old.
These days I've been enjoying getting reacquainted with a wonderful box of cards called the Art of Attention by Alina Brower and Erika Jago.
Each card has a positive affirmation on it,
And some have yoga poses on them as well.
The one that I pulled out today,
For example,
Said,
Believe.
Believe that you are a light for someone else.
Yesterday's was Listen.
Your simplest listening grants profound healing.
Yes,
Please.
More of this type of sentiment.
For me,
Using the cards releases the pressure of having to conjure up a grand intention,
And it pushes me to focus on things,
Good things,
That I might otherwise not have considered.
My instruction for you is to think about how you want to feel in your day.
What are some sayings that come to mind that can help you feel that way?
Make a list if you'd like so that you have something to turn to,
Or just be inspired by the feeling that meets you each morning.
Okay,
So finally,
What is the point of this daily intention setting?
Why do it in the first place?
If there's one thing I've learned in my decade as a working parent,
It's that we often undervalue the outsized impact that incredibly small,
Almost imperceptible,
And seemingly microscopic changes can make in our days and in our moods.
Yes,
I've been on a micro self-care soapbox for a while now,
But for good reason.
Small things like setting an intention really contribute to my overall mood,
My anxiety level,
And my feeling like I can cope with the world.
For me,
Setting an intention in the morning is a daily reminder that I have at least some co-creative power in my day.
Yes,
There are forces beyond my control,
Many,
Many,
Many forces.
And at the same time,
There are also ways I can choose to orient myself each day to look at the world in a new way,
Or to make a commitment to myself.
But what if you don't think about your intention again at all after you set it?
What if you forget?
Was the act of setting the intention completely pointless?
Not at all.
I'll fess up,
Most days I don't think about my intention again after the morning,
But the act of defining it for myself points my nose in the direction I want to go for the day.
This in turn helps me steer the ship of my day into calmer waters from the start.
Give daily intention setting a try,
And let me know how it goes.
You got this.
