During Meditation, I Feel Present And Quiet But ...

[With English interpretation] Ven. Pomnyun Sunim's Answer to “During meditation, I feel present and quiet but I also feel empty, lonesome, and down. Are these feelings part of the meditation process?”
Selection from Sunday Meditation with Ven. Pomnyun Sunim. meditation q&a [Week 18] (August 9, 2020)

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Transcript

I increased my meditation practice to a daily routine. I began to experience a sense of being more present and to some extent, More quiet. Ironically, Being in that state makes me feel empty, Lonesome, And somewhat down. Then I get irritable, Annoyed by illogical small things. It seems that all of this becomes more evident after sittings. I can't explain this ambiguity. I can't explain this ambiguity. I can't explain this ambiguity. This is a part of meditation, The sense of being and emotions. This is what you experienced while meditating. Why did you experience this? This is a phenomenon that you are experiencing during your meditation. So it's part of your meditation. And to that end, The sensations, Feelings, Or thoughts that you are feeling has been part of your subconscious that's being surfacing during this meditation. So these are the factors that have been being driven and churning in your subconscious that you were not previously aware of. So you are not aware of them. So you are not aware of them. So you are not aware of them. So you are not aware of them. So these are the factors that have been being driven and churning in your subconscious that you were not previously aware of. This set of cognitive and emotional habits, Patterns, What we call karma, Is now kind of being surfacing during your meditation session that you were not previously aware of. But now through meditation, You have managed to kind of calm the waters and be able to kind of see deeper into your subconscious and kind of sense and become aware of all the different churns, Of the different factors that are affecting your foundational makeup. And this is the awareness you are experiencing. So it is true that meditation has allowed you visibility into this. However, Meditation is not the cause of these sensations and feelings. This has been with you. Because your awareness has become clearer and more acute during meditation, You are just becoming kind of consciously aware of what's been happening. So imagine, For example, If you are focusing on something intently, Some external distractions or noise you can't really hear. You don't become as aware of those. But if you calm your mind and allow everything to kind of calm down, Even the slightest sound or noise you can hear. However, If your inside becomes calm and you are able to acquire that awareness that's that acute and sharper and clearer, You are able to kind of delve down and see what's been happening deep in your subconscious. It's not created because of meditation, But you are able to now see it through meditation. That allows you to realize that all the negative emotions that you have experienced when you actually encounter a situation was not created by that encounter or that situation. It's actually has always been with you deep underneath that you are just realizing was there. So this is not a good thing or bad thing that you do. And do not make the mistake of further imbuing what you are just becoming aware of with any meaning. But just continue your practice and continue sharpening your awareness. At some point in time, You might actually experience these negative emotions or this sensation you are experiencing kind of disappear. And it is that consistency that's important of practice.