In this episode,
We're going to explore cultivating agency and catching early signs of reactive tendencies before they escalate past the point of no return.
So the idea is to use our interoception to notice reactivity as early as possible.
One of my teachers,
The executive coach Joe Hudson,
Likes to say that when we're in reactivity,
We are not fit for human consumption.
Whatever we're doing,
Whether it's at work or in a conversation with family,
Once you catch emotional charge or reactivity,
Your number one priority is to find calm and connection again.
This might mean excusing yourself to go outside or go to the bathroom for five minutes to self-regulate and then returning to continue if you choose.
So the three C's stand for catch,
Calm,
Choose.
With catch,
We're noticing the protection mechanism or reactive loop.
With calm,
We're pausing to go through 3,
2,
1 to return to our sensors.
And then choose,
Noticing that more options are now available.
So let's go into Catch.
When you notice yourself in reactivity and the more finely tuned your interoception,
The earlier you'll be able to track this.
Practice acknowledging it out loud,
Ideally without guilt or shame.
And congratulate yourself for acknowledging it.
Dropping any stories,
Receive a breath,
And then make it your priority to come back to center.
My friend Chris Sparks also used what he calls cognitive canaries,
Which are stories or voices which come online when he's in some kind of reactive loop.
And for him,
This is one of many cues that he's been hijacked.
So then to prioritize regaining connection.
And another reason that training our interception is so important is that we can learn to associate and attune to these embodied signs of reactivity,
Stress,
Or fear,
Regardless of whatever story we're telling ourselves in the moment.
OK,
The second C is calm.
And let's practice it here.
It can just take a moment.
Pause and as you're listening to my voice,
Feel into the lower parts of your body,
Particularly your legs and feet and contact points on the ground.
Orient and ground yourself in your environment.
And from here,
We're gonna go through what's known as the 3-2-1 process.
So beginning by acknowledging three things that you can see.
Acknowledge three things that you can see.
Second,
Label or acknowledge two things that you can hear.
Label two things that you can hear.
And then finally,
Feel one thing with your hands or your feet.
Feel one thing with your hands or your feet.
And finish with one deep breath and let it out with a sigh.
Okay,
The third C is choose.
And noticing how from this state,
You're no longer stuck in reactivity.
More options are now available to you.
You might still choose to get angry at your boss or whoever it is,
But this will be a deliberate choice.
And everyone experiences the activation of their system slightly differently,
So it's important that you know how it feels in your body.
And coming back to the idea that these three branches of the nervous system,
The sympathetic,
The ventral vagal,
And the dorsal,
It's essential that we learn to sense and recognize when we're in each of these states so that we don't get stuck.
And as a sensation arises,
You can perceive it while it's still a sensation and where you still have the capacity to respond wisely.
So there you have it,
Those are the three C's.
Catch,
Calm,
And choose.
And I wish you good luck exploring and experimenting with these in your daily life.
