The Meaning Of The Yin Yang Symbol For Perfectionists - E34

Have you ever seen the yin yang symbol? It may seem like it has nothing to do with perfectionism. But after years of study and experimentation, I’ve extracted 5 valuable lessons that helped me gain more confidence and joy. Listen to this episode to learn how the yin yang symbol can inspire you to appreciate failure, be kinder to yourself and embrace who you are.

Transcript

Hello,

I'm Annie Musu,

A certified EFT tapping master practitioner.

I help women build confidence,

Set boundaries,

And enjoy healthy relationships.

Welcome to my podcast,

Hush Your Mind,

Building a better relationship with yourself.

On this show,

I offer practical wisdom to help you clear fears,

Limiting beliefs,

And trauma so that you can gracefully create a life you love.

Welcome to episode number 34 of my podcast,

Hush Your Mind,

Building a better relationship with yourself.

Have you ever seen the yin-yang symbol?

It has always intrigued me since childhood.

I'd spot it in my mom's martial arts films,

On my brother's pendant necklace,

Or as a tattoo.

In short,

The yin-yang symbol comes from ancient Chinese philosophy,

Dating back to at least 3,

500 years old.

It represents the opposing yet complementary forces that govern the universe.

But what does this have to do with perfectionism?

Indeed,

The concept of yin and yang seem far off,

But after years of study and experimentation,

I've extracted valuable lessons about perfectionism from it.

By the way,

The yin-yang symbol has also taught me precious lessons about relationships.

You can find out more in episode number 28.

So here are the five lessons I've learned about perfectionism thanks to the yin-yang symbol.

The first lesson is success and failure go together.

If you look at the yin-yang symbol,

You can see it has two equal parts.

They look like black and white teardrops.

The black area represents yin and the white yang.

Different elements of the world come in yin-yang pairs like day and night,

Cold and hot,

And passive and active.

Day and night are opposites,

Yet without day,

The sun wouldn't kiss the flowers.

Without night,

Our bodies would never rest.

So day and night coexist and balance each other out.

Similarly,

Success and failure are opposites,

Yet you can't have one without the other.

Failure allows us to explore what works and what doesn't.

In other words,

It's the key to success.

Perfectionists hate mistakes,

But perfecting your way through life does more harm than good.

Instead,

Change your mindset about setbacks.

Let them help you learn and grow and celebrate your failures.

Let this Lao Tzu quote inspire you.

Quote,

All can see beauty as beauty only because there is ugliness.

All can know good as good only because there is evil.

Therefore,

Having and not having arise together.

Difficult and easy complement each other.

Long and short contrast each other.

High and low rest upon each other.

Voice and sound harmonize each other.

Front and back follow one another.

End quote.

Lesson number two is all or nothing thinking doesn't work.

When you do a job perfectly,

You feel on top of the world.

When you don't,

You feel like crap.

There's no in between.

It's understandable.

As a recovering perfectionist,

I struggle with hitting publish before my blog article is just right.

What if my dear readers don't like it?

Worst,

What if no one reads it?

But if I let all or nothing thinking stop me,

I wouldn't have the pleasure of sharing my experiences with you and perhaps helping you become more confident and joyful.

Do you see how the black and white teardrops in the yin yang symbol chase each other?

As yin grows,

Yang emerges.

It's a constant cycle.

Nothing is ever black or white.

The Greek philosopher Heraclitus said,

The only constant in life is change.

So if your worth depends on something fleeting like achievements,

You'll work hard for stress,

Anxiety,

And depression.

Let go of all or nothing thinking by paying attention to when mistakes feel like failure.

Maybe you made good progress on a healthy diet but gave into ice cream.

Do you beat yourself up?

Then find the positives.

I ate healthy for one week straight.

I've been good at cutting back on dessert.

This is a new lifestyle for me,

So I can give myself some slack.

Treat yourself kindly.

With practice,

It'll get easier.

Promise.

Lesson number three is perfection is in the imperfections.

In the yin yang symbol,

There's a small white circle in the black teardrop and vice versa.

It represents the idea that a bit of yin or yang resides in its opposite.

The unity of opposites make one whole,

Thus the circular form of the symbol.

Kintsuki pottery showcases this unity particularly well.

It came about when a 15th century Japanese emperor refused a cracked tea bowl repaired with drab staples,

So craftsmen bound the ceramic pieces together with gold,

Creating a unique work of art.

Our materialistic society obsesses over perfection.

I wonder,

What if we welcomed more wabi-sabi,

Or imperfect beauty,

Into our lives?

Here's a lovely quote by author Leonard Coren,

Quote,

Wabi-sabi means treading lightly on the planet and knowing how to appreciate whatever is encountered,

No matter how trifling.

In other words,

Wabi-sabi tells us to stop our preoccupation with success,

Wealth,

Status,

Power,

And luxury,

And enjoy the unencumbered life.

Just as it is important to know when to make choices,

It is also important to know when not to make choices,

To let things be,

End quote.

So take a deep breath and center yourself.

Enjoy this simple moment.

Lesson number four,

We're all in this together.

Everyone wants to feel loved,

Accepted,

And safe.

When our needs aren't met,

We often blame,

Isolate ourselves,

Or work like crazy.

Our inner bully makes us believe we're unworthy,

Until we complete mile-long to-do lists,

Look healthy and put together at all times,

Or make everyone else happy first.

Let's remind ourselves that we're human,

Yin and yang.

We each have our own challenges.

You and I slip up and try to do our best.

No one's perfect.

In other words,

You're not alone,

Friend.

Don't be so harsh on yourself.

Open your arms towards your shadow,

All that you've deemed ugly,

Bad,

Or inadequate to let in the light.

Write down your flaws and use EFT tapping to reduce any negative emotions that arise.

Simply becoming aware of your emotions can bring more peace.

And finally,

Lesson number five,

Embrace all of you to feel whole.

In high school,

I identified with creative rebels who boasted their differences.

We'd blast Bjork and Bikini Kill songs and paint away during art parties.

I'd scoff at the vibrant motivational posters on classroom walls.

Be yourself.

Yeah,

Tell that to everyone else.

Confident I was already rocking who I was,

I rolled my eyes at the cheerleaders,

Athletes,

And nerds.

They seemed stuck in their roles.

Little did I know,

Priding myself on being an outcast actually reinforced my fear of rejection.

As a child,

I felt rejected by my classmates,

Parents,

And friends.

So to protect myself from getting hurt again,

I rejected everyone.

Voila,

The rebel was born.

And for double protection,

I ensured everything I did,

Wore,

And said was perfect.

That way,

No one could ever criticize me again.

Can you remember when your perfectionism began?

Did you feel the same way?

The desire to feel accepted holds strong because back in the day,

We secured our well-being by belonging to a tribe.

But when we suppress parts of ourselves,

Beat ourselves up,

Or avoid self-care,

We're letting other people control our lives,

And ultimately,

We feel unworthy and lonely.

As Brene Brown says,

Quote,

Owning our story can be hard,

But not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running away from it.

Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky,

But not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy,

Experiences that make us the most vulnerable.

Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light,

End quote.

So for more peace,

Harmony,

And love,

We must embrace everything about us to feel fulfilled.

The yin-yang symbol guides us to balance the positives and negatives within.

It's not easy.

Many things get in the way.

If we let them,

They keep us small and unhappy.

Things like past hurts,

Limiting beliefs,

Unsupportive loved ones,

Our no-pain-no-gain society,

Conventional standards of success and discrimination.

Yet it's liberating to know you're never just one thing.

You have the seeds of success and failure,

Happiness and unhappiness.

For every negative,

Its opposite exists within you.

So it's up to you to decide which seeds you'd like to water.

Remember though,

To avoid leaning towards extremes,

Strike a delicate balance,

And marvel at your journey.

Thank you so much for joining me in this episode of Hush Your Mind.

If you enjoyed it,

Please feel free to visit my about page on my InsightTimer profile for my website,

And follow me for new content and live EFT tapping sessions.

May you have the courage to love and accept yourself.

Be well and take care.