Experiencing Peace Consistently - L,L,&L W/ Glenn Ambrose

Most people want peace but have difficulty experiencing it. In this episode I get clear on what peace is and therefore how to experience it in our lives consistently.

Streamed Monday, January 13th 2025.

Transcript

Welcome to Life, Lessons, And Laughter with your host, Glenn Ambrose. Hello, Hello, Welcome. Welcome to your home for peace. So today, I'm talking to you about peace. I went for a little walk with my dog, Faith, And I was thinking, Maybe I'll do a podcast today. What should I talk about? And the first thing that came up was love, And I said, Okay, Well, What version of love? Then peace came up, And I said, Okay, What version of peace? And then nothing really came up. So I started contemplating it, And I started thinking, You know, Peace is something that we often seek, Most people want, Sounds really good. And oftentimes, That can be a symptom of something that we don't look into that deeply, Right? Like anything socially acceptable, We don't usually look into that deeply. Like once our brain settles on some sort of definition of it, Or understanding of it, Of anything, Oftentimes, Our brain stops dissecting it right there. You know, And peace is a word that we've heard our entire lives. So, You know, We probably grasped a concept of what peace was when we were children. And have we slowed down and looked at it since then? Oftentimes, No. And no, That's applicable with just about everything. So I started looking into it, And I said, Okay, Well, What is peace? It's like, Okay, Well, It's like a sense of contentment. There's no. . . I'm not caught up in any problems. You know, It's. . . Whatever, You know, I was looking into it, And different things were coming up. And then I decided to start googling different terms. And as I was doing that, I was seeing that, You know, People will talk about peace in lots of different areas, Internal peace, Societal peace, You know, All kinds of different ways. So I was like, Okay, Well, You know, What's the definition that they're giving? And I noticed that, Especially like in a societal situation, It was like it could be described as absence of war. So I was like, Oh, Okay, There we go. Now, What is war? You know, What is the energy of war? What are the dynamics of war? And war is basically a form of conflict, Right? So as soon as I hit conflict, I'm like, Okay, Now we're getting somewhere. Because conflict is something that we all have in our lives in all kinds of areas, Right? So if you want to get closer to the truth, You simplify. If you want to get further from the truth, You complicate. So oftentimes we look at, You know, So if I'm looking, I tend to look for the common denominator. That's why I always use the term energy. What is the energy of it? Because that's the common denominator. It can look very different on the surface. You know, In society, Absence of peace can look like war. And then internally, Absence of peace in our own lives can look like other forms of conflict. Now, We would normally think of those things as different, But they're the same, Because they're both based in conflict. War is just a version of conflict, Right? So once we understand that peace is basically what is left over, It's our natural state. It's what happens when there is no conflict. It's absence of conflict. So when there's an absence of conflict, Conflict is the thing that comes in and knocks things off center. Conflict is the thing that takes us from our natural state into something other than our natural state. If we let it, Of course, But we'll get into that more in the future of this podcast. Not the future future. So peace is absence of conflict. So if I want peace, I need to be absent of conflict. And that can apply to anything. It can apply to societal. It can apply to, You know, That's when I know that I'm getting closer to the truth. When I come to an understanding that can apply to all the situations attached, So they don't all look different. Now they all look the same. That's when I know that I'm getting deeper down to the core. Right? So top pieces, You know, Peace can look very different in very different situations up on the surface level. But then when you go down and say, Okay, Well, It's, It's pieces is the natural state that you land in. When there is no conflict, When there is absence of conflict. Oh, Okay. Well, That applies to all of those. Okay, Cool. So, So that's the core. That's, That's, That's down near the bottom. Now, Who knows as we, As we talk about it, We might even be able to go further, You know, Down even deeper. We'll see. But as soon as I hit that, I was like, Okay, Cool. Now we've, We've got a simple concept to, To discuss absence of conflict. So if we want to experience peace, We can't go get peace. Peace, Peace isn't a thing that we can achieve. We can't go looking for it and find it. It's the result of something. It's our home base. It's just there. It's there. And if we're not experiencing peace, Which is our home base, Our natural state, If we're not experiencing that, Then there must be some sort of conflict that's drawing us out of the peace. Because that's just where we land when, When conflict, Conflict is resolved and there isn't any, We land in peace. We settle back into our home base, Into our natural state. Okay. So, So we don't have to go find peace. We don't, We can't go looking for it. We can't do something to achieve it, Which, Which is, You know, Another good sign. See doing this for as many years as I have, I noticed signs and it's. When. Spiritual terms, You know, I have a chapter on in my book about this. Spiritual terms imply non-action. Allow, Remember, Forget. Those are actually all spiritual terms. And there are others. Peace, Love. Those are spiritual terms. They imply non-action. You can't go in the corner and peace real hard. You can't remember real hard. You can't forget real hard. You can't effort these words. You're either doing them or you're not. You're either in them or you're not. But you can't try real hard to get them. There's no efforting. So that's another sign that we're talking about something deep and spiritual, Which we just saw. Peace is non-efforting. There's nothing that you can do to arrive peaceful. Now you can get rid of something. And then you end up in peace by proxy. Right, So you can get rid of conflict. And then you'll land in peace. But you didn't create the peace. You didn't. The peace is there, Man. It's just there. That's just the natural state. Until conflict comes in or we bring in conflict and it disrupts the peace. So if we get rid of the conflict, Then we settle back in to peace. So how do we do that? By shifting the way we interact with life. You know, It's nowadays. And nowadays, You know, Who knows? It's probably been like this for a hundred thousand years. But nowadays, It's when something happens that we don't like. Generally, The dynamics of what happens internally with people is stimuli happens that they don't like. And because they don't like it, An emotion, We'll call it frustration or anger, Something arises that's unpleasant within them. And then that's kind of where we stop. We just go, You know, We walk around mad all day. As soon as we see somebody, We'll tell them this unfair thing that happened that we didn't like. And then we can feed it. That's how we feed it. Oh, Did I tell you I got cut off in traffic on the way into work this morning? Oh, Yeah, Let me tell you all about it. Well, I'm coming up on this intersection, Right? And this moron, Like, And all we're doing is we're just, We're literally reliving the experience. Our body doesn't know the difference between whether we're thinking about something, Talking about something or experiencing it. That's the high you get out of it. It's the adrenaline kicking in. It's the emotions. It's that wave of energy that comes in. This is why when you're talking about it, You start getting all jacked up, Right? And then this guy comes and all your energy goes up, Right? The reason that happens is because you are literally experiencing the same emotions as you did in the moment. And what happens in the moment, If you're in a perceived dangerous situation, Your adrenaline kicks in and pushes you up to fight or flight, Right? So that's actually where we're reinventing that when we're telling the story. So our body is experiencing the same negative toxins that are flushing through because of the fight or flight and the fear that we're putting ourselves in. But that's a whole nother story. That I've talked about on other podcasts. So usually we just hover there. And then for the next 40 years, Every time somebody brings something up, It triggers the same negative emotion in us. And we carry this stuff around. There are many resentments and sometimes large resentments that we carry around for lifetimes. We never. . . And then somebody goes, Well, That happened 20 years ago. Why are you still mad about it? Well, Because they did it. Because they did that to me. Yeah, But why are you still mad? Well, Because they did that and it wasn't right. Yeah, I understand that. But why are you carrying that with you for 20 years, 10 years, 5 years, 2 years, 1 year, 1 week? Why are we carrying this stuff with us? It's because we don't do anything with it. We're not responsible with our thoughts and with our emotions. They just run us. So if something happens that we don't like, Well, I'm upset. Why? Because I didn't like that. But how does being upset help? Well, What? Do you expect me to not be upset? Yeah, That's exactly what I expect. Because being upset doesn't do anything. We think being upset over something that happened that we didn't like is normal. And it's the right way to be. And we're supposed to be like that. And if we're not like that, Then there is something wrong with us. That's the societal norm in which we live. This is why most people are not walking around with any level of peace. Because they think it's appropriate to not be at peace. Okay, So that's kind of like the overview of societal norm of how we interact with life. Something happens that we don't like, And it knocks us off of our peace. And that's appropriate in our minds. That's how it's supposed to be. Well, I disagree. I don't think we need to live like that. Because I don't see any benefit in doing that. How does it enhance my life? It doesn't. I end up walking around with numerous resentments over numerous things. And then I walk around angry all the time. Because so many things that have happened over my life, That I keep carrying them with me. Because I just didn't take any responsibility for my thoughts and my emotions. I experienced a thought or an emotion because I experienced something that I didn't like. And it automatically triggered it. That's fine and natural. But that lasts a moment or a few moments. Then what? Like we need to get back in control of how we are processing what transpires in the world. So when something happens that we don't like, It's our responsibility to. . . That should be the starting point, Not the ending point. This is living consciously. So when you're living consciously, You go, Okay, Something happened that I didn't like. Okay, What am I going to do with this? What box am I going to put this in? Because I'm not walking around carrying it. For the next two weeks or two years or 20 years. Excuse me. So what do I do with it? Well, What are healthy things to do when something happens and you don't like it? Well, Sometimes you have to take action. If somebody is verbally abusing you, You should take some action. You either set up a boundary verbally, Hang up the phone, Walk out of the room. Tell the person you're not going to allow them to talk to you like that. And you need to leave. Whatever. Sometimes you're in a situation where something that you don't like is happening. And the appropriate response is to take action. Sometimes that action might be the three main, Usually they're viewed as defense mechanisms. But the three main ways to act in difficult situations is freeze, Flee, Or fight. So sometimes it's appropriate just to freeze, Just to stop. Stop feeding your energy into it and just stop. And maybe in certain situations you might even be able to let the other person get something off their chest or something. And there's really nothing for you to do. You're not in any danger, Whatever. So you just stop. The situation de-escalates. And then you move on with your life. Sometimes you have to take action. Defend yourself, Get yourself out of the situation, Whatever. Sometimes that action looks like a fight. Not a physical fight, Hopefully. But sometimes that can look like, In a healthy way, That can look like standing up for yourself and saying, Whoa, Wait a minute. No, This isn't acceptable. I'm not going to be treated like that. Sometimes that. So sometimes there's a version of action that we need to take. Sometimes it's a version of acceptance that we need to take. That acceptance can look very different. Depending on the situation. Sometimes we have to accept it and go, Sometimes stuff like this happens in life. Sometimes there are long lines at the grocery store for no apparent reason. And I just have to stand in it. And I might as well just make peace with it. Just let go of the fact that I would rather not have this happening right now. But accept that there's nothing I can do about it right now. And sometimes things like this happen. And just simply accept it. Sometimes we have to accept the fact that it happened. But go, Okay, I'm going to double that with some action. The last three times I came to this grocery store, It's been ridiculous with the lines. So I'm going to accept it now. But I'm going to look for another grocery store to go to. Or a different time to go. Acceptance. One of the big problems when people try doing this. When people try doing this because they're not really well versed in doing it. Is that they think acceptance means approval. And go listen to my podcast on acceptance. Acceptance is not approval. That doesn't mean we like it. It doesn't mean we want it to happen again. It just means we're accepting the reality that it did happen or is happening. And if there's action that we can take, Well then we take that. If there's a boundary we need to set, Then we set that. But just walking around, Just being angry. Because you don't like something that's transpiring. Serves zero purpose except hurting you. Because you're going to carry that around with you. A lot of people think that they don't. That energy needs to go somewhere. And if you don't figure out a healthy way to work with that energy, You're just stuffing it. And this is why people get bitter as they get older. Because they're just stuffing, Stuffing, Stuffing, Stuffing. And a lot of them will be like, It doesn't bother me. That's when you know it bothers somebody. Pay attention to my energy. It doesn't bother me. Yeah, It does. I can tell by the energy. You were just expressing annoyance in the way you said that it didn't bother you. Does this sound, Does this feel, Like pay attention to how you feel when I say it. Does this feel like somebody is completely at ease and peaceful? Doesn't bother me. No, It doesn't. Why? Because they're not. They're bothered. So we stuff that. This is why when things are bothering me, It's always a problem with me. Always. 100% of the time. If something is bothering me, It's a problem with me. Always. That's not to say that everything in the world is righteous. That's not what I'm saying. Because that's not what acceptance is. But if something is bothering me, That means that I haven't figured out a healthy way to look at the situation yet. I haven't figured out a healthy way to either process what has happened. Find something useful to do with it. There's something wrong with me. There is nothing wrong with life. Life is not supposed to be the way Glenn wants it all the time. It's funny because we function so unconsciously. It's like if I said to anybody, Hey, Do you think that you are God and life is supposed to succumb to your every will and desire and you're just going to walk through life and everything's going to go exactly the way you want it to all the time. And if it doesn't, That must mean that there's something wrong with life. Everybody would say, No, Glenn, That's absurd. And most people walk through life like that is the truth. Why else would you get angry? Why else would you get upset when things don't go the way that you want them to and then carry that anger and upset with you forever? If there was nothing wrong with what happened, Then why are you upset? And if there is something wrong with what happened, Then why is there something wrong with it? Because you didn't like it? Because that's the only variable here. You just didn't like it. I know that you have your reasons for not liking it. Everybody has their reasons for not liking it. So that's what people do to defend their misery. They come up with a laundry list of why they didn't like it. So what does that have to do with the meaning of life? What does that have to do with the flow of life? What does that have to do with the way that life actually works? Do you like the fact that fire burned down somebody's house? Well, No, Of course not. Right, Okay. Does that mean that there's something wrong in the world? Yes, This poor person lost their house. Fires have been burning down houses for animals and people since the beginning of animals and people. That's something that happens on the earth. Sometimes lightning strikes some dry wood and a fire breaks out and things burn. It wasn't a personal attack on you. It doesn't mean that there's something wrong in the world. Somebody started a fire though. Okay, Well, Yeah, That happens too. I don't condone somebody starting a fire. But I'm not crazy enough to live in this world thinking that nobody ever is ever going to start a fire. There's 7-8 billion people on the planet. Somebody's going to do something stupid and start a fire, Either accidentally or on purpose. And of course, We try to minimize it. Of course, We do. But it doesn't mean that we're going to be successful. It's still going to happen sometimes. And I'm still not going to like it. But see, This is my point. If I look at it realistically and I go, Okay, Well, It happened. There's nothing I can do about it. Sometimes things like this happen. Okay, Now what? And I drop into a place of acceptance. Now I don't feel like a victim of life, So I'm not carrying that around. That's what most people do. They just put these. . . Whenever really bad things happen, They put in these little placeholders in their energy field going, This happened to me and it wasn't fair. So then that builds up their story. So they have this really good story about how life hasn't been fair to them and wherever they are in life and whatever misery that they're experiencing isn't their fault. It is your fault. Just like it's my fault. It's not because you think I haven't experienced difficult times. I have. But it's how I process them. This is what is meant by that. . . There's all kinds of sayings about this. One is something like, You can't control the wind, But you can adjust the sails. We can't control what happens to us in life sometimes. There's a flow and sometimes things happen, But we can adjust how we interact with those things. And we've dropped into a place where just accepting that we're victims and it wasn't fair is like acceptable. Then if you, God forbid, You tell somebody they're acting like a victim because everybody knows the victim word now. 10 years ago, You could tell people that they're trapped in the victim mentality and they'd be like, Oh, What's that? And it would expand their mind. You could explain to them. Now, If you say, Oh, You're trapped in the victim mentality. No, I'm not. People get immediately defensive because they found out what it is and they know it's a bad thing and that's all they know. My point is what we need to do is find a healthy way to process this. We need to come to different conclusions about things that we don't like instead of sitting there going, That's not fair. See, This is my point. We have to think deeper. We go, That's not fair. People just stay there with most things in their life. They come to a conclusion that something happened in their life and it wasn't fair and they have all these reasons to prove that it wasn't fair. I didn't ask for this to happen in my life, Stuff like that. They go, There, Okay, So that's my stance. That's how you're going to handle whatever you're experiencing. You're going to come to the conclusion that it wasn't your fault and it's not fair. Okay, What happens then? You know, Please think about this stuff. What happens then? What happens to that? Like something, We are affected by how we process experiences in our lives. So how we experience things, How we process our experiences is enormously important. Enormously important. Because it determines how we think, If we get defensive, How we act, How bitter we get. It affects everything. It affects our perception of reality. It affects how we interact with life. It affects our happiness. It affects our peace. It affects everything. Our very existence is dramatically impacted by the way we process the experiences that we have in life. Dramatically. So it's important. And most people don't even think about it. They just come to the conclusion that it wasn't their fault. So now they don't have to change anything because it wasn't their fault and it's not fair. So that's even better that you don't have to change anything because you're just the poor victim here. And then they just sit there and they go through life just whenever they can process a negative experience and put it onto that pile, They do because it's easy and there's no thought involved. And if anybody questions it, Then they can go, Well, What do you want me to do? Just not let it bother me. I'd be lying to myself. No, It's not. I'm not saying lie to yourself or be angry. Like you slow down and think about what you're saying. You think that those are the only two options in life? You either lie to yourself or you walk around angry all the time. That's God's plan. This is the basis for reality that God set up. Real intelligent freaking being. Of course not. There's other things we can do that are actually healthy, Like reframing things and looking at things and going maybe somebody was trying to get there. What's more likely, We'll go back to the getting cut off in traffic. What's more likely to be true? Some stranger that you've never met before that doesn't know your schedule, Doesn't know where you're going to be, Was sitting down at breakfast trying to figure out how they were going to ruin somebody's day. And cut through an intersection and almost killed themselves and somebody else in the process. Do you think that was a calculated plan on how to wreck your day? Or do you think maybe this person, I don't know, Was lost in thought over what he was going to do with his marriage because it seemed like it was falling apart. Or that his child was having trouble at school and he didn't know what to do. Or that he maybe had to take his mother to the hospital for a cancer treatment and she was probably going to die this afternoon and he was all wrapped up in his head. It's not to excuse the person for running through the intersection. I'm just saying what's more likely, That it was a personal attack on you or that something happened in this person's life. Something that we've all experienced. There is nobody that has driven for more than probably three months who hasn't at one time or another been distracted by something. So it's not mandatory that we're angry about it. I mean, In the initial moment, Boom, Oh my God. Oh, Okay, I'm safe. All right, Now what are you going to do? How you process that? How do you file that in your experiences? Your internal log of experiences. That needs to be filed somewhere. And most people don't pay attention to where they're filing it. So it just goes into another victim mode. Another personal attack on me. Another BS system that transpired in my life. Another difficult scenario. And it just stays there. And that box gets filled more, And more, And more, And more, And more, And more over the years. Instead, If we take a moment and go, Okay, Wait a minute now. I'm safe. I'm okay. Nobody was hurt, Thank God. Hopefully, I'm sure this scared that person too. I hope they're okay. I hope that maybe they learn from this and be a little bit more conscious when they're driving. Sometimes the scare is the very thing that prevents people from doing something stupid in the future where somebody actually does get hurt. Sometimes it's a warning. And then all of a sudden, We reframe it like that. We can process it like that. Go, Hey, It's happened to me before. I've been distracted. I'm sure it wasn't personal. There's almost 8 billion people on the planet. All kinds, I don't know how many cars. Stuff like this is going to happen every once in a while. It just is. Most of the stuff we take personally and get all upset about is just a result of having 8 billion people on the planet. Stuff's going to happen, Man. So take the time to process things in a healthy way. And that's not a lie. I'm not asking you to lie to yourself. What's more likely to be true? That this person was trying to kill you, Even though they don't know you? Or that they were distracted momentarily for God knows what reason? Something that we've all experienced before. The idea that they're probably distracted momentarily is probably closer to the truth. So not only is it not a lie, But when you start really looking at things and reframing them like this, You start finding out that really, You being a victim of these situations seems more like a lie. Oh, These people that love me hurt me. Oh, Really? So what's more likely? That people that you love and that you think love you are trying to hurt you? Or maybe they are irresponsible in their own lives and don't know how to treat people appropriately. It's probably the latter. And people treat us the way that we teach them. So if you have people treating you poorly in your life, There's a reason for that. And it's your fault. It's because you allow it. Don't allow it. And you'd be amazed at how people stop treating you poorly. So this is. . . And that's the other byproduct. It helps us take responsibility for our lives. Therefore, We can make the adjustments. Did you notice when I was talking about the way that most people do it? They don't look into it. They don't reframe it. They don't take responsibility for it. They don't do anything. They just look to blame external circumstances and push it out off their plate like it's not theirs, Which ends up in a negative processing. The positive processing actually puts you more in control. And all of a sudden, You stop looking for solutions. Why? Because it's nobody else's fault. How can I prevent this from happening to me in the future? Wow, Great empowering question. Well, I keep lending this person money, And they never pay me back. I have an idea. Stop lending them money. And I bet you you won't have a problem with them paying you back anymore. Wow. So it just leans us right into the solution. There's a lot of situations that we can actually make better if we stop and process them correctly and go, Is this the time for me to practice acceptance? Or is there some sort of action I can take to not experience this again in my future? That's what we need to do. We need to ask those two questions whenever we have an experience in life. And that puts us in the driver's seat, And it prevents us from stuffing all this crap and having all this conflict in our lives. And if we're not processing things as us being the victim of conflict, As us being the victim of circumstances or other people, Then that's all conflict. Everything that I've been talking about is conflict. How do I know it's conflict? It's because there's resistance to what happened. That's what the anger feeling is generated from. Something happens that you don't like, And you resist the reality that it happened. I don't like that it happened. That's resistance. It shouldn't have happened. That's resistance. You see, This is why that it shouldn't have happened. It's not fair. That's why it's so dangerous. People don't realize what that means energetically. Energetically, You're saying that there's something wrong with the universe, And it's starting to attack you for no apparent reason. That's not true. But energetically, That's what you're saying. Something happened to me that wasn't fair. Oh, Well, Then it wasn't fair. Then something must have made it happen, And it was directed at you. Oh, No. You're being attacked by some external force. That must be life. Energetically, That's actually what it means. I don't know if you guys are going to understand that, Because I know my brain processes things in a way where I understand it. I'm hoping you guys are going to follow that. If you can experiment with this, It's going to be a major help. If you can understand energetically what things mean, That's how I follow them down. What does that mean? What does that mean? What does that mean? Well, It means you're viewing yourself as a victim of life, And that's a very unhealthy perspective to have about life. You're never going to feel safe. Why? Because there's constant conflict, And you have to defend and watch out for, Because life could attack you at any time. That's danger. That's conflict. So you never know when it's going to hit, Right? So we have to get out of that mentality and process things in a healthy way and practice acceptance and take action when we need to and come to those final conclusions in your brain about situations. Oh, Maybe somebody got distracted. Maybe there was a loved one in a hospital. That's why they weren't paying attention when I went through that intersection. Oh, Okay. Well, I'm okay. The car's okay. Thank goodness. Okay, Good. And I'm going to process it like that. I'm fortunate that nothing bad happened. And if something bad did happen, Then you need to find a way to process that. But you need to find a way to process it in a healthy manner. Why? To get rid of the resistance, To get rid of the conflict. And then if you don't allow resistance to what is into your life, All suffering is resistance to what is. See, This is where we end up when we get to the end of this. All suffering is resistance to what is. So if we get rid of the resistance to what is, That gets rid of the conflict. If we get rid of the conflict, We land in peace. This is how we can walk through life experiencing peace consistently, By being conscious of the way that we are processing the interactions of our lives and our experiences, Processing them in a healthy way, Practicing acceptance when we need to, Taking action when we need to, Dealing with the actual conflict. When a conflict comes, Process it, Work through it until you find a place where you can accept it. I guess that's another way to phrase it. It's like, You know, What am I looking for when I'm trying to process to find something in a healthy way? I'm trying to look for a mentality that is believable, That is true, That makes me not feel like a victim of life. Because that's just not true. I'm not a victim of life. Life isn't attacking me and strangers aren't attacking me for no apparent reason. So I don't want to process information that would energetically imply that. So, Yeah, So I'm just looking for a way to process things where I can drop into a level of acceptance of them, You know? So I can't accept that some maniac almost tried to kill me at an intersection. That's unacceptable. How am I supposed to accept that? But if I look at it and go, Well, Maybe somebody, This person get distracted. God only knows why it could be millions of different reasons, But maybe they got distracted and it had nothing to do with me. Oh, Well that I can drop into an acceptance. I can't accept something that's unacceptable. Somebody trying to kill me at an intersection is unacceptable. So of course I can't accept that. But I can accept that sometimes people get distracted. Right? We need to take some time to pay attention to how we're processing the situations in our life. And if we do that, We're going to be getting rid of little bits of conflict and resistance all over the place and we're going to land into that place of peace. All right? So that's going to do it. Hope you guys enjoyed. Reach out if you need me. And yeah, I think that's going to do it. So peace. Actually, I do want to check something as I'm ending this recording. Yes, I need to set a little outro. This one. No, I can't. Okay. All right. Thanks for bearing with me. I needed to do that in the middle of a podcast for some reason. All right. Thanks. And I'll talk with you guys soon. Peace.