The End Of Not Good Enough

Repeatedly telling the story of “not good enough” is a familiar habit to most of us, an aspect of our human conditioning. But what does it have to do with who you truly are? In this exchange, Gangaji, simply and directly shares how to bring an end to the story and “step into freedom.”

Transcript

Intelligently you don't want this fear or this thought,

I'm not good enough,

To keep you from living your life and following the direction of your soul.

So the last place we would think to look is just surrender.

Hello and welcome to Being Yourself,

Self Inquiry with Gangaji.

My name is Barbara Denempont.

Today I'm bringing you this wonderful exchange with a woman who was working to build a school for children in a very dangerous and violent area of her home country of Guatemala.

She is such an amazingly brave woman on so many levels and in this exchange she speaks to the fear that arises but also the thought of simply not being good enough.

I was afraid of coming up,

I'm Spanish speaking,

I'm not from here,

So I was like,

Oh my God.

Your English is perfect.

No,

Thank you.

And I've been having this difficulty because we want to create a foundation in our country to construct a school for children,

Very,

Very needy children.

We contacted the mayor over there and he took us to several areas,

But these are the most vulnerable areas.

And while we were conducting this tour,

To put it in a way,

He mentioned that some of those areas and some of the schools have been attacked by some gang members and killed some children.

And all of a sudden,

All this fear came up.

And I was asking him,

I mean,

We were telling him we would like to construct a world-renowned area,

But we don't want to be,

Get,

You know,

Targeted.

And he mentioned that what they do is they use these vests so that people from these gangs recognize them and don't kill them.

What country is this?

Guatemala.

You live in Guatemala now?

Oh my goodness.

I'm so happy Guatemala has you.

Yeah.

It's a serious situation,

Obviously.

It is very difficult,

The situation.

Yeah.

And we went to visit those areas and it's beautiful and children are very needy,

Very,

Very needy.

But all of a sudden,

All this fear.

And I was like asking myself all this fear of dying.

And it comes and goes,

Comes and goes,

But I don't want that to stop me from,

I mean,

I don't want to neglect myself for,

You know,

Not taking care of me and my staff and everybody else.

But I don't want me to stop,

I mean,

I don't want that fear to prevent me from.

.

.

It's beautiful,

It's beautiful.

So it's a balancing,

I mean,

Obviously,

Fear is not your enemy here.

It is a dangerous situation.

You know that,

That's just intelligent to see that.

And there is a great need there.

So this is nothing anybody else could ever tell you what to do.

Exactly,

Exactly.

Yeah,

And besides that,

It's like underneath that,

It's also this fear of not being like good enough for the job,

Not being.

.

.

That's a different story now.

Yeah,

Underneath that.

.

.

Maybe not even good enough to survive.

Yeah,

That is not your friend.

Exactly,

And I found myself,

Yeah,

With this soap opera that I have in my head.

Brainwashing,

Brain dirtying maybe is the correct term.

But that's somehow,

You have gotten that from your.

.

.

That's conditioning,

That's the conditioned mind.

Fear is something different,

That's an instinct that arises.

Maybe you go into a mind trip with that,

But this,

That I'm not good enough,

This is absolutely unnecessary baggage.

Exactly.

So the only way I know of to see through this is to just really experience not being good enough.

Just assume,

Okay,

I'm not good enough.

I mean,

Who is good enough?

Can you say you're good enough,

Really?

So if you just take this moment and be completely and absolutely not good enough,

The conversation is finished.

And there's a great discovery in that.

What are you feeling as we have this conversation?

What are you aware of?

It's like,

Like opening my,

My sore,

My,

Yeah,

Opened.

Opening?

Yeah,

On my back also it was like.

.

.

Yeah,

So you're not fighting this I'm not good enough.

And you're not following it,

You're actually meeting it.

You're being,

You're ending the conversation of your ego with your superego.

It's like,

Okay,

You're right,

I'm not good enough.

Huh,

It's freedom,

Isn't it?

Then you're,

It's not about your being good enough to prove that you are good enough when you know you're absolutely not good enough,

Because you have the constant refrain of that in your mind stream.

It's like,

It's finished.

No one is good enough.

It's a made-up standard.

You know,

We've tried to counter that with our positive conditioning.

I'm good enough,

I deserve this,

I'm,

In every day,

In every way,

I'm getting better and better.

You know,

It works,

It helps.

And it's much better than in every day,

In every way,

I'm getting worse and worse,

You know,

Which is what the conditioning feeds.

So it's a shift.

It's a shift and it affects everything.

It affects your brain,

Your body,

Your circumstances.

But as long as you have to do something to counter this,

I'm not good enough,

There's still somewhat of a battle going on.

Forces of light and the forces of darkness.

When you just say,

Okay,

I call an end to it,

You win,

I'm not good enough.

Like when you're so good,

I don't have to pretend.

Yes,

It's the last thing we would think to do,

Because we've learned,

You know,

Intelligently,

You don't want this fear or this thought,

I'm not good enough,

To keep you from living your life and following the direction of your soul.

So the last place we would think to look is just surrender.

It's not surrender,

It's surrender,

Okay.

We don't ever have to have that conversation again.

I get it,

I'm not good enough.

Then you get to live your life.

You don't need to be good enough.

It doesn't take being good enough.

That's a false equation.

And with that equation good enough,

You've got to have its opposing equation.

I'm better than anyone else.

It's an unnecessary conversation.

Then you have this issue of fear,

Which is perhaps necessary,

And your willingness,

I mean,

You came up here and you don't think your English is so good,

So I'm not good enough,

But you came up here,

Right?

Look out here at everyone.

In this moment in time this is your support system.

And there are people here,

I think of Kim,

Who go into very extreme situations,

Where certainly it's impossible for her to cure it all,

To fix it all.

But nevertheless,

There she is,

There you are.

It's really,

I'm in awe of you.

Really,

You want to build a school and support your staff in that school,

For these children who are hungry for that,

These children who have a chance,

Who haven't learned that they're good enough or not good enough yet,

Who never even have to entertain a question of good enough.

It's a false question,

As you are.

That's enough.

And then the intelligent choices you make,

You may make mistakes,

Of course.

Everyone makes mistakes.

Grasshoppers make mistakes.

Squirrels make mistakes.

Bears make mistakes.

Humans make mistakes.

Plants make mistakes.

They go,

You know,

The wrong way for the light and poof,

They meet concrete.

Mistakes are part of the fabric of living life.

What are you experiencing?

This is beautiful,

What I see on your face,

But I'd love to have words for it if it's possible.

You can speak in Spanish if you like.

Oh,

Thank you.

It's like this opening to your love also,

To everybody's like support and silence,

And just being grateful,

And opening to this feeling of,

In a way,

It's not like the egoic,

I deserve it,

But this love that it's good,

It's fine to receive it.

Yes,

You can receive it as you are.

Yes,

Excellent,

Excellent.

That's receiving yourself too.

It's like accepting it,

Accepting me,

You know.

That's giving and receiving support to yourself,

To everyone,

To these kids,

To your country.

To my grandchildren.

To your grandchildren,

Yes,

The unknown children.

Good?

It looks really good,

I'm really happy to meet you.

Thank you.

Thank you for being here.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

I think it's quite often that the issue or the conditioning of not good enough or absolute worthlessness comes up in these meetings,

Because that's always a control factor at some point,

You know,

We talk about how we're enslaved to the mind,

And that's one of the prods that becomes automatic.

And if you think of getting out of line,

Or you think of going where you've been told you can't go,

Or think what you've been told you shouldn't think is buzz,

Oh,

Okay,

I'm going to work on being good enough now,

Someday I'll be worth something.

The invitation is to recognize that there may be a sting to that,

It may hurt,

But it can't touch you,

Really.

It's,

You've incorporated,

Internalized the prod of being told you aren't good enough,

Or you're absolutely worthless,

And you've had to practice that.

It's like decorating your cell in prison.

So within the context of being worthless or not good enough,

I'm living pretty well.

I know when I'll be fed,

I know,

You know,

When I get to be outside,

It's like,

Yeah,

It's not free,

Until that's insufferable in itself.

And regardless of being good enough,

Or even worthless,

You take the step into freedom.

You're willing to bear the pain that may come,

The attack of the gods,

Of the demons from the past that say,

Oh no,

You're going too far,

You're overreaching,

You really aren't good enough for that.

I mean,

You're good enough to exist,

But you're not good enough for that.

And so that's part of being free,

Is recognizing that's conditioning,

That's the conditioned mind,

And maybe you're even born with it,

Maybe it's passed on somehow in the DNA,

But it can really stop with you.

That's simply too,

And I don't necessarily mean easily,

But that simply,

It is a challenge of a lifetime to be free,

Because then there's a recognition of it's not even about good enough,

Or worth,

It's free of that,

And it's an unknown.

It's not your little known cubicle where you go for your self-torture.

It's an unknown,

It's like,

Whoa,

I don't know,

What could be out there?

Doesn't always feel so good.

That's what makes it a radical choice,

And many people will actually choose to go back into another nicer version of that,

Until it just becomes insufferable,

And whether I'm worthless or not,

I have to be free.

And that's what brings us together.

That's when I appear in your life,

That's when Papaji appears in your life,

Or Ramana,

Because you're not given tasks to do to prove your worth.

You're not given exercises to do to talk yourself into your worth.

You are actually,

As you are,

Free.

It's so easy to tell this pernicious story of not being good enough,

And to realize,

Well,

Okay,

I'm not,

But then to go on with your work in the world,

To go on with your life,

What a blessing that is for all of us,

I would say for the whole world.

So I hope you're finding this podcast supportive in your life,

In the situations that you find yourself in.

There's always more material on Gangaji's website,

Gangaji.

Org.

That's g-a-n-g-a-j-i dot o-r-g.

My name is Barbara Denempont.

Thank you for listening.

Until next time.

Reviews

Exceptional. This internal narrative where we selectively believe this or that about the self can be a tricky thing—in that we can delude ourselves •out• of feeling “worthy” or “enough.” How often do we challenge the very concept of “enoughness,” tho?

Thank you.

The best advice I’ve ever heard about the issue of not feeling good enough. Thank you for bringing it to us. I’m so grateful 🩵

Beautiful teachings as always. Thank you!🙏

Thank you so much 😊

The best!!!! Must listen again . I finally got it!

What a relief! Just surrender and stop the fighting... thank you! 💝🙏

An eye opening resolution to 'I'm not enough'.

Thank you. This is a struggle have. Surrender is a new approach! 🙏

Thank you dear Gangaji

Thank you for this teaching and encouragement.

Excellent as always …GOD BLESS YOU 🙏🏻🙏🏻