The Road Back To Self: Hero's/Heroine's/Part's Journey

Joseph Campbell's and Jung's version of Hero's Journey portrayed in parts language. Destabilizing life events and exhausting inner turmoil provide a ripe call to adventure for exiled parts to bravely confront their suppressed wounds and limiting behaviours. Answering this call, through the compassionate companionship of Self energy, the extreme burdens parts have carried transform into courageous self-truths to share. By sailing through treacherous straits of intense feeling to heal split-off emotions, parts cross an inner threshold to break free from the confinement of past survival rules and disempowering conclusions. United with the inner light of Self-leadership, formerly fragmented parts enjoy renewed membership among a community of awakened allies, their reclaimed gifts now uplifting the whole internal system with hope. This heroic journey of fractured parts back into wholeness mirrors classic tales of hard-won redemption through steadfast love and sacrifice for greater meaning.

Transcript

If you can begin to allow yourself to land to arrive wherever you are and with this I want to gently remind you that there's no right way for you to be.

Only you know what's perfect for you.

So if you want an upright posture or if you want to be sat down on the bed or lying back see if you can listen.

If you can in this moment listen to your body and allow everything to descend downwards letting it roll down so that you're not fighting gravity.

Don't resist what is inevitable here,

This drawing downwards.

Imagine if you were standing underneath a shower or a waterfall.

Imagine this water encouraging you,

Drawing downwards really letting yourself be in whatever position feels right.

The tiniest muscles bones drawing down and you can always shift,

You can always move.

So I'm feeling to speak a little bit about the hero's journey and I hasten to add that when I use the word hero I'm not implying any gender bias here.

Hero is simply an archetype,

It's an archetype that is accessible to men or women.

So if you like we can use the word heroine and I've studied Joseph Campbell for probably about a decade and I had a little look at his,

The way he looked at the hero's journey through myths and some of you might know that the hero's journey has sort of three essential stages to it.

The hero departs on an adventure,

Hearing some kind of a call and so the hero in so doing leaves familiar,

Ordinary,

Known world as they are called into the unknown and I have a daughter who's nine,

Just turned nine and so she loves Frozen and those of you who've seen Frozen 2,

Elsa sings about going into the unknown.

So Disney's very good at these archetypes,

Disney's fantastic at speaking to the heart through myths,

Through parable,

Storytelling but anyhow let me get back on track.

So the first part is that the hero departs on a journey,

The second is that they are somehow initiated,

That they learn something about the unfamiliar world,

The unknown,

Maybe scary,

Maybe dark,

They have to learn how to navigate it,

Maybe they meet some scary aspects of themselves,

Maybe they meet the inner critic,

The inner bully,

The inner predator,

Bluebeard as Clarissa Pinkola Estes calls it and then the third stage is that the hero returns having learned all these beautiful ways to navigate this unknown,

The hero then returns to the familiar known world and brings the gold and some of you may know this quote Carl Jung talks about how the unknown or the unconscious or shadow,

90% of this is actually pure gold.

So when we go on this hero's journey we're actually mining for gold.

Now typically these myths involve some kind of an external journey the character slays dragons and conquers all sorts of enemies and traitors and whatever.

When we look at the hero's journey through the lens of shadow work or trauma healing or internal family systems we're delving inside and Dick calls this a u-turn,

We take a u-turn.

So in this way the hero's journey serves as a blueprint for transformation,

For personal growth and Joseph Campbell really extended this notion of hero's journey from Carl Jung and so Carl Jung recognized that the hero's journey is sort of a process of individuation marrying,

Merging,

Intermingling the conscious with the unconscious,

The anima with the animus.

So this is what the hero's journey is about and this is what's on offer,

This is why we go through these trials.

It's a little bit like when we delve into this dark,

This mud we allow the lotus to bloom,

To come forth,

To flourish.

So I want to lead a meditation that is sort of that inquires into your inner world,

Your parts and how some of them have undergone or are currently undergoing a hero's journey.

And again I'm very careful to point out that hero here is not attached to any gender bias,

It's neither male nor female,

It's a universal archetype that is accessible to all of us.

That's the kind of angle that I'm going with.

So let's have a little look then,

So there are sort of 12 steps here to this hero's journey.

So the first step is the call,

The call to healing or the call to adventure and typically this call,

It can come as a very loud alarm and it can come in moments of unexpected trauma.

It can be when we're absolutely fed up of repeating patterns,

Either with our family or in our romantic relationships or work patterns or our attachment or our relationship with money.

It's like there's a call to change,

A call to explore the unknown,

Something that is new to us.

And so when we are at the receiving end of this call,

It can be quite frightening,

It can be disconcerting,

It can unbalance us.

And the call typically elucidates a part or it provides a trailhead to a part that is calling out for help in the non-dual Western text,

Course in Miracles.

There's a fantastic quote and it talks about everything is either love or a call for love.

So when we talk about this first step on the part's heroic journey,

They're responding to some kind of an inner call for love,

Call for healing.

And then when we hear this call,

We can invite self to call out to this part for connection,

For curiosity.

So we respond to this call or self responds to this call for healing with connection,

Curiosity.

And this sends out an invite,

An opportunity for the part to transform,

To unburden,

To be understood,

To be healed.

So at this point you might,

You might notice,

You might notice when parts have called out to you,

When you've become aware of patterns that needed to change.

You might be in the middle of responding to a call right now.

Let's see if you can soften your ear,

Soften your body,

Allow this,

This shower,

This waterfall to draw your body closer down.

Don't resist gravity and see if you can hear a yes.

Yes,

I hear the call and notice if self is here.

Can you catch threads of curiosity,

Connection,

Maybe compassion?

So the second part of the part's heroic journey is the refusal of the call.

And this can be in very subtle,

Unconscious ways,

Or very,

Very blatant.

So we may have a part that initially resists connecting,

That it's mistrusting of self,

Doesn't want to share its burdens.

And of course its role,

It has an important role in our family.

It protects us in the only way it knows how to.

So to respond to the call for this part,

Maybe to risk something terrible.

Can you imagine how heroic this part has been?

Protecting,

Guarding.

Is there a,

Is there an archetype or a character from a film that corresponds to how heroically this part has been guarding the inner world?

You notice that there may be initial resistance here.

It's not all plain sailing,

But with persistence,

With curiosity from self,

We can begin to get to know this part a little bit.

And eventually the part allows the presence of self.

And this is what in the hero's journey is called meeting the mentor.

So the mentor here through the lens of IFS is self.

Self is this guide on this journey that facilitates this.

Note how the word mentor here for self doesn't evoke images of a ruler,

Someone who tries to take charge of things and enforce their own rules.

Self is softer here,

More tactful,

More compassionate.

Self in its role as a mentor,

In its role as a guide,

Is bringing qualities of compassion and courage to support this part's journey.

And then this allows the part to become courageous.

And in so doing,

It crosses what's called the threshold.

So in IFS terms,

The part now agrees to connect with self.

It opens up.

It's willing to share its burdens.

It's willing to share its story.

And so this is how we develop this self-to-part relationship,

Gently,

Slowly,

Without forcing,

The part's able to relax in the presence of self.

And then as we go further in,

We come across parts that are polarized,

That oppose this part's quest for healing.

We may meet parts that our allies are on the same side as this part.

This is where it gets very nuanced,

Very complicated.

This is where we get to see the inner workings,

The mechanisms of how these patterns are held and who the key players are in this pattern.

And all of this unfolds under the guise and gentle guidance of self.

So self continues to hold space for this journey.

And if we find ourselves blending with a polarized part,

Self can reroute,

Get to know this part,

Befriend this part,

And then return to the part that's on this hero's journey.

So all of this is welcome.

This is like Rumi's guesthouse or self's guesthouse.

We witness all these parts.

We see how they war with each other,

Pulling in opposite directions.

And this is a test.

This is a big test here.

None of this is easy.

And then as we build this relationship in between parts and the polarized parts see that the tensions they are holding here is keeping the pattern in place.

And when they get to see that the reach trying to help in their unique ways,

Often in the presence of self,

The parts can really soften.

And so often what's an opposing or a polarized part,

That part then becomes an ally.

We have someone who can really join this journey.

And so we go a little bit deeper down.

We're gaining more and more trust.

And this trust is what allows us to approach the innermost cave.

This is the next step of the part's heroic journey.

This is where we get to witness the primal wounds that underpin the parts.

And these are the core wounds,

The core beliefs,

The memories.

And this really requires self to be completely present,

Self-energy to be enveloping and interlacing and intermingling in between the parts all around,

Within,

Without,

Beside,

Above,

Below.

We get to excavate.

We get to go into the shadows,

The hidden corners,

The parts we've attempted to keep down,

We've exiled them.

This is,

Can be very,

Very painful work.

And so on the hero's journey,

This is called the ordeal or sometimes the dark night of the soul.

So when we're witnessing these difficult emotions,

Memories,

It can feel quite intense,

Quite painful,

Maybe overwhelming at times.

If it feels overwhelming,

It's a,

It's a hint that there's another part here.

And there's a part present.

Self cannot be overwhelmed.

This part of the journey is very,

Very deep.

And this is when,

This is where we get to uncover the gold.

You know,

Diamonds are made under immense heat and pressure.

And the heat and pressure that is felt when we witness just the atrocities that this part,

This exiled part of us has gone through.

Immense heat.

And we may notice that the body start to respond.

That can be intense feelings of shame,

Hourlessness,

Injustice,

Betrayal,

Abandonment,

Rejection,

Helplessness,

Hopelessness,

Terror.

This is for me and for anyone who's been through this.

This is a place of not only intense heat and pressure,

But also it holds so much potential for transformation,

For healing.

It's a real portal.

This is where we get to meet the dark face of trauma.

Sacred work.

This is sacred,

Sacred work for all of us.

And so we give space,

We give time,

We give presence.

We witness.

We allow the part to fully tell us just how bad it was.

Just how terrible it was.

All along with self-present.

And then once this part has shared everything it needed to,

It has an opportunity to transform to unburden,

To shed any beliefs,

Feelings,

Thoughts.

And this is for those of you who've had IFS therapy.

This part is often easier when it's done with a therapist.

But you may have noticed how when we enter into this field,

This state of healing,

This point of the part's journey,

It feels very shamanic.

It feels very psychedelic.

This is where we get to reconsolidate the memory.

This is where we get to unburden and retrieve the part and integrate any new qualities.

So this is where the part can be aligned with self.

It can take on any of the qualities.

At this point we can offer the part confidence,

Creativity,

Courage,

Compassion,

Clarity,

Curiosity,

Connection,

And calm.

This is where the part gets to draw in on its beautiful natural resources that have been buried.

This is where we get to scoop out this gold and bring it forth.

This is where we see the innocence of these parts,

The tenderness,

The love,

The trust,

The creativity.

This is where we see the true face of these parts.

And at this point they can continue being a very beautiful and useful part of the inner family.

This is where they get to contribute.

This is where they can shine,

Shine their light under the gentle mentorship of self.

And you may already have parts of yourself,

Patterns that have been healed.

You may already have seen the light that was buried underneath layers of limiting beliefs.

So at this point,

As the part is transformed,

As the gold is uncovered,

As the inherent innocence and beauty of this part is returned,

It becomes unified.

It becomes part of the whole,

The sense of rejoining the inner community,

The inner family.

So previously the part may have been very much fragmented.

So this is where the part can co-create with self,

Co-regulate with self.

This is where the part lets go of the steering wheel and allows self to jump in the driving seat.

And it can sit by the side of self in the passenger seat.

And when it's called for,

It can help to navigate,

Co-navigate.

This is the unification part of the journey.

And so as self is now in a driving seat,

We get to take the road back,

Road back into back into the ordinary world,

Back into the known.

We get to bring all this goodness back into the rest of the parts,

Rest of the family.

And we don't heal alone.

When one part heals,

It has a knock-on effect on the other parts.

So when we share the good news of the healing,

When one part is unburdened through this self energy,

All of the parts somehow get the benefit of it.

And this is where we take the road back to the rest of the family so that the part can contribute unique gifts and serve the whole.

And this is really what Dick calls self-leadership or in this hero's journey,

I call it the self-led mastery.

So now the part has access,

Not only to its own gifts that have been uncovered,

It now also has access to all the beautiful qualities of self.

So now it can have a foot in each of the worlds in the unknown,

Which is now known,

And in the known world.

This is the mastery.

It's mastered both worlds now.

And so it can move freely in between the two worlds,

Flowing.

And as it does so,

It can also return to the outer world.

It can return to our loved ones,

But no longer burdened,

No longer in extreme roles,

But under self-led mastery.

So the part can now co-regulate,

Co-create with others.

So we can engage in the outer world with agency,

With resilience,

With wisdom.

And so we find that we're not alone.

First,

The part has realized that it's not alone on the inside,

That self always has its back,

But then the part realizes that it's not alone on the outside.

So in that way,

We allow it to gain relational tools.

We get to return back to our community,

Back to family,

Back to groups.

And the final,

Final step on the part's heroic journey is unitive consciousness.

So unitive consciousness here means that the part is not only part of the self in the inner world.

This is the self as particle.

The part is not only connected to others through self as a wave.

This is the transpersonal self,

But it's also connected to the universal self.

In No Bad Parts,

Dick capitalizes that,

So it's all capital self.

And so this is where we get to rest.

This is where we get to fully,

Fully rest.

This is when we know that the universe has our backs.

First,

We get,

The part gets to find out that inner self has our backs.

Then we get to find out that these selves in the outer world also have our backs.

And finally,

We get to rest in the universal self as we trust it.

This is what it means when we hear people say the universe has your back or trust the universe.

This is what's,

This is the final step on the part's heroic journey to this unitive consciousness.

It can join the flow.

It can join the compassion,

The love,

The beauty,

The peace,

The creativity,

Knowing that it's never separate.

And this is,

This is what it means to take this journey.

And notice how it undulates from personal to transpersonal to universal.

In a way,

The part gets to find out that it was the universe all along.

Just as the drop in the ocean is the ocean,

The part is a reflection of self,

Which in turn it is the reflection of the universal consciousness.

Not at any point does the part gets bypassed,

Gotten rid of,

No longer needed,

Destroyed,

Transcended.

The part remains uniquely itself and helpful and co-creative.

All that changes is that it's been unburdened and now it has the ability or the perspective to be able to feel connected to self and larger self.

So that was a lot of words.

I wasn't planning to say quite so many words.

I prefer a little bit more spaciousness in between the words.

Space for the bones to settle was a lot to hack in.

Just before we close this meditation,

The final thing I want to point to is that this journey doesn't end.

There is no destination.

And we can take this journey as many times as we want or as many times as needed for our unique inner world.

Sometimes people go through this once and they have dark night of the soul and they come out the other end and they're done.

They're finished.

They've done healing.

Other times we go round and round and round,

But the round and round isn't a sort of,

Just as you never cross the same river twice,

You deepen in a sort of a spiral further in and in and in pattern.

So the beauty about this 12 steps that the parts can take is that they can continue to revolve around each time seeing deeper and deeper truths,

Different facets.

The reason why the diamond shines like it does is because it has so many different faces,

Very detailed,

Very,

Very nuanced.

And so each time we get to see a different face and you may have noticed this,

You may be aware of a pattern.

And then every few years or so you go,

Ah,

As though the pennies dropped deeper.

Now I get it.

And then,

You know,

If you're anything like me,

At that point you think,

Oh,

Great,

I'm healed.

And then something else comes along and five years later you're like,

Ah,

There's more,

There's more.

So we're never really done.

We're never cooked.

We don't ever get there because we're always there.

We're always here.

We're always now.

We're always fresh.

So I hope that was a useful,

Useful little foray into the hero's journey,

The heroine's journey,

The part's heroic journey to healing.

Just notice how you are as we come out of this story time that we shared.

Notice how you are,

How your bones are.

What's your breath doing?

What's your heart doing?

How are your hips?

See if you can invite a bit more of a conscious breath into the lungs,

Maybe sending out gratitude to any parts that have joined you on this journey and see if you can begin to come back to your surroundings,

The space that you're in.