Becoming Whole: Honoring And Embracing All Of Your Parts

“The more we can learn to recognize and honor all of our parts, the more we can find inner peace and balance.” – Richard Schwartz, founder of Internal Family Systems (IFS). In today's IFS meditation, we listen deeply to a part of ourselves that is hurting, welcoming all that comes up for it by providing a spacious and loving container. The somatic orientation of this meditation is inspired by Eugene Gendlin and John Welwood and incorporates focused, but gentle attention on the body. By providing loving attention to challenging sensations in our body, we can find a greater integration among parts of ourselves and a sense of serenity.

Transcript

Welcome. Find a very comfortable spot to sit or lie down. Take a moment to just settle in to the present moment. You might stretch, Yawn, Move in some way that feels good to you. Begin to take some deep breaths at your own pace. Let the breath flow in and out. And as you do that, Just release any tensions you're holding in your body. Relax your shoulders. Let them hang. Relax your abdomen, Pelvic floor. If you're holding tension in your jaw, Your eyes, Your tongue even. Just let that go. Let gravity do its work on your body. Begin to become aware of any sensations in your shoulders, Neck, In your core, Your belly or chest. Continue to breathe and see if you can bring some gentleness. See if you can relate to yourself in a compassionate way, Even if you might be experiencing uncomfortable or difficult feelings. I invite you to find the most difficult or uncomfortable set of sensations in your body, Feelings, And begin to put a sort of non-judgmental, Spacious attention on those sensations. It might help to imagine this part of your body, These sensations, As representing a child, Someone you love, Someone you care about. I welcome you to say, I'm here. I'm here with you. I could spend time with you now, Listening, Being present. And notice how your body reacts. No need to expect that something should change. The presence and attention is enough. Next, I'll invite you to find a part of your body that feels good, Or at least tolerable, Neutral, And focus your attention there. I invite you to use this as a resource to come back to, Or you might imagine a place or a memory that makes you feel safe, A person, A presence, That makes you feel safe and relaxed and comfortable. And come back to this place whenever you need to throughout the rest of this meditation. So, Returning to this uncomfortable part of your body, Emotionally challenging part, See what happens if you ask, What do you need? And see if you can ask in a way that is genuinely curious. And stay open, Listening for the response. It may come quickly in words, Or it may not come at all. Either way, Just be present to the sensations. As we hold space for ourselves in this way, Things change naturally on their own. There's no need to be urgent or try to pressure ourselves. See if you can welcome whatever comes in each moment. Take breaths, Let the breath flow, And rest your awareness on the sensations. You might ask again, What do you need? Is there something I can do for you? And see if you can be open to curiosity, To really try to understand what it's like for this part of yourself. If it helps, You might tell yourself some words of endearment or care, If that comes naturally. I love you, I'm here for you. Some parts of ourself are more verbal than others. Some parts need to be held, To be cared for in nonverbal ways. So I invite you to experiment. It might be a hug, Or a hand on the chest, On the heart. It might be a stretch, A yawn, Noises. Something that helps you soothe in the way that you might help a baby to soothe itself before it knows how. As you experiment with finding what this part of you needs, Check in with the sensations again. Are there any differences from the beginning of this meditation? When we're patient with ourselves, When we're gentle, When we treat ourselves as we might treat a young child or a beloved friend, When we give ourselves care, Remarkable things can happen. As we come to a close with this experience, I invite you to take a moment to just thank yourself, This adult part of you that chose to take this time, That chose to be present. Many things might be going on in life, But you chose to take this time. I also invite you to share your gratitude with this uncomfortable part of yourself for whatever it was willing to do or not do. Begin to notice the points of contact of your body with whatever surface you're on. Notice any noises in the space you're in, And blink open your eyes if they're not already open, And begin to orient yourself to the space you're in. You might look around, Take a breath, And begin to go into the rest of your day. Always returning to the pleasant things and the pleasant sensations and resources that you've cultivated.