Why Can't We See Ourselves As Others See Us?

Why don't we see ourselves as others see us? Everyone else can see the beauty, magic, and divinity within us, but not us? Why?? It's highly annoying to me. Are you like this as well?

Photo by visualsofdana on Unsplash

Transcript

Hey everyone,

Boomsheka here.

Another video for your viewing pleasure.

I just came back from a really long day of being out,

Doing workshops on creativity and sexuality and then hanging out with a bunch of amazing friends that I've made here in Chiang Mai.

I actually just can't even believe that I get to hang out with these absolutely magnificent human beings.

The best of the best,

Seriously.

These are people that inspire me and awe me and they're individuals that I aspire to be.

These are individuals that I am just so grateful to be around.

And while I was hanging out with these people,

There was this thought that kind of started repeating in my head.

And that's the reason I'm doing this video right now.

Because I'm so tired,

But I really wanted to share these thoughts with you before I went to sleep.

Because it is 10 o'clock at night here and you know me,

I like to sleep early.

So sorry about the pause in the video.

The internet connection is a little bit weird.

But as I was sitting there and I'm chilling with these individuals and I'm amazed by them,

There was this thought that kind of kept on going in my mind,

Repeating over and over again.

And that thought was that I just cannot believe how lucky I am to be around these people,

Obviously.

But more so,

I kept on thinking to myself,

What do these people see in me?

Why are these people hanging out with me?

And I'm thinking to myself,

Why and how can these people believe that I am anything worthy?

How can these people,

These amazing bright beacons of light,

When I hang out with me?

And the reality of it is these individuals kept on saying to me that they were so happy to see me,

That they missed me,

They wanted to hang out with me.

One of these individuals is extremely busy,

But she took time out of her day and Janie is who I'm talking about.

And she messaged me saying,

I miss you,

I really want to see you.

I hope you come tonight to this party,

La la la.

And just to have all these sentiments expressed in favor of me was just so gratifying,

But also baffling,

Absolutely baffling to me.

I'm looking at these people and thinking to myself,

How can or how,

Why do you individuals want to hang out with me?

What's going on here?

It doesn't compute in my head because I'm looking at myself and I see me,

This person here,

This tiny little individual,

And I see these individuals,

Other individuals who are looking at me and they see a beacon of light.

They tell me that they see absolute amazing individual in front of them.

They see this huge,

Huge powerful person.

But when I see and I look at myself,

I only see the small individual,

The small person that doesn't really even matter.

This person that is not even important.

I see this person that is just inconsequential.

I see this person as absolutely a nobody.

I see nothingness.

And I wanted to really do this video right now because I really want to express these sentiments.

I'm not saying this in a manner to be derogatory towards myself.

I know who I am.

I know how amazing I can be,

But it is easier for me to see my own light,

To see how powerful and beautiful I am when I am in the presence of amazing individuals like the people I hang out with today because they really show me how amazing and powerful I am by being around me and by telling me all these amazing things about myself.

So I'm not necessarily saying that I always need to be told that I'm awesome because a lot of times I do believe in myself,

But the more I believe it is because the more is reflected back to me by all the individuals that are surrounded by me.

So a lot of these women that I hang hung out with this afternoon,

They're absolutely amazing,

Powerful,

Independent,

Strong females.

And to be hanging out with these females and to be accepted as one of them makes me realize that I am one of them.

It makes me realize that I'm not just an imposter sitting among them,

That they're actually accepting me as part of their tribe,

Which means that I am a powerful,

Strong,

Independent female myself.

And that reflection is a reflection of,

Again,

Myself.

So the universe is reflecting not only myself to myself,

Like my inner being to myself,

But also it's reflecting all these beautiful people to myself.

And so the question that comes to my mind is why can I not see my power?

Why can I not see my beauty?

Why cannot I see all this without all this reflection?

Why do I need other people to tell me how beautiful and kind and amazing I am?

Why is it so hard for us to see our own light?

Why is it so hard for us to see our own beauty?

It's not only just me.

I would be speaking to a lot of women in that group.

And I told them how amazing they are and how they make me feel.

And I just,

I'm so grateful to be around them.

And every single one of them looked at me in bafflement.

They looked at me thinking with them,

Thinking themselves,

Really,

Am I that powerful?

Am I that individual?

They just couldn't believe that I,

As an individual thought that about them when they had this perception of me as this powerful being.

So they themselves couldn't see either.

So you see what I'm saying?

All of us have this,

We see all of our shadows.

I think basically that's it.

We see not only our light,

But we see all of our shadows.

I know the deepest darkest part of me.

I know all the best,

Best,

Best,

Bad stuff I've done,

All the worst things I've done in my life.

I know all of it.

It's all inside of me.

And so when I'm looking at myself,

Instead of focusing on the good,

A lot of times what I'm doing is I'm focusing on the bad.

I'm focusing on all the guilt that I feel about all the different things I've done.

I've focused on all the horrible things that I've done,

All the blah,

Blah,

Blah,

And whatever it might be.

And so instead of focusing on all the good,

I'm doing that.

And whenever I do that,

If I only see the shadows in myself,

When people tell me that they see my light,

I think to myself,

How can you see my light?

I see all the shadows.

I see all the darkness.

I see all the blackness.

I see all of the horrible things I've done,

All the horrible things I've accomplished,

All the things that I didn't do,

All the regrets that I have,

All of that.

And so I think it's because of those shadows that we have a hard time thinking that we are beacons of light.

They're basically powerful beings.

And sometimes we need these individuals,

These beautiful,

Amazing individuals in our life to show us our own light.

We need those people to tell us how beautiful and amazing we are.

Otherwise,

We would be just looking at our darkness.

We would just be looking at our shadows and thinking that's who we are.

Whereas the shadows are just a percentage or just a minor part of who we really are.

The rest of it is light.

And more of it,

If you are in that state,

More of it is light than shadow.

And that's what other people are going to notice about you.

They're going to see your light.

They're going to see your amazing qualities.

They're going to see how beautiful you are.

They're going to see that.

And they're going to remind you of that fact.

And so that's amazing.

And you need to keep those people around you.

You want them around so they can tell you how beautiful you are.

But I really want you to think about the question,

Why is it so much easier for them to see our light?

What if we started seeing our own light within us?

What if you started believing in ourselves as others believe in us?

What if we saw them,

Saw us as they see us?

If I started doing that,

If I started looking at myself or seeing myself as my friends in Chiang Mai or friends in Toronto see me,

I would see myself as this grounded,

Powerful being that brings light and healing to everyone that she meets.

This person that is absolutely a magnificent manifesto.

And I would see all the good in me.

I would see the light if I focused on that.

But what I end up doing in a lot of different ways is focusing on the dark,

On the shadows.

I focus on all the horrible things I've done in my life.

And I negate everything good that I do.

And in that manner,

I forget that I am this person that is a healer.

I am this person that is filled with light.

And I really,

Really want you guys to stop doing that to yourself as well.

It's a constant practice.

I mean,

I've been working on it myself to go beyond believing that I'm going to go beyond believing that I'm an imposter,

To go beyond believing that I am just a nobody,

To go to that point where I believe that I am this powerful being that is capable of so much.

And I want you guys to be in the same spot.

I want you guys to realize that there are people who are looking at you and seeing amazingness.

And if they can see it,

It means it exists.

And you can always find someone in your life who looks at you like you're absolute magic.

And if they can think that you're magic,

If they can believe in you,

And if these people are,

You know,

People are skeptical,

And if they really truly believe that you are magic,

Then you really truly can believe that you're magic as well,

Because you really truly are.

There's no doubt about it in the general sense of the word.

But if you have doubt about it,

Look at how other people look at you.

Look at how much joy you give to them.

Look at how they perceive you.

And I'm absolutely sure that the way they look at you is that you are absolute magic.

And I want you guys to look at yourself like that as well.

I love that this video makes sense.

I hope that,

You know,

I want you to start thinking about yourself as that beacon of light that everyone else sees you as.

And I know that there are people in your life who see you like that.

So I hope that this video makes sense.

It's been a really long day,

And I really wanted to get these thoughts out there.

So if I sound a little convoluted,

You're welcome to send me a message and ask me questions about it,

And I'll definitely be more more succinct when I'm sending you a message or more clear.

If you guys have any questions at all,

You can message me on Facebook,

Or in the club,

Or you can message me through email by boomshakahatthemillionairehippie.

Com.

I am so grateful again that you're part of this club.

If you're interested in anything,

Any kind of learning from me,

Or if you're interested in asking me any question at all,

I'm here to help.

So please,

Please do let me know.

And I hope that you have an amazing day,

An amazing night wherever you are in the world.

I'll talk to you guys soon.

Bye for now.