Permission To Want More Without Feeling Guilty

This meditation offers a safe space to explore your longing for more — without shame, without apology.
If you’ve ever felt guilty for wanting something different, deeper, or more aligned, this practice is here to help you soften that inner conflict.
You’ll be gently guided back to your own voice, reminded that growth isn’t selfish — it’s necessary.
Let this be your quiet permission slip to want more… without guilt.

Transcript

This meditation is called When Wanting More Feels Like Betrayal.

It came from a time in my life when I started quietly wondering if the life I was living was really mine.

I wasn't planning to leave anything or anyone,

But something inside me was shifting.

I started wanting more,

And that made me feel selfish,

Guilty,

Even disloyal.

And since then,

I've heard so many stories from women in the same place,

Women who feel trapped between gratitude and grief.

They have so much love for the people around them,

But they're also aching to feel like themselves again.

If that sounds like you,

If you've ever silenced your needs to keep the peace,

Or doubted yourself for wanting something different,

This meditation is for you.

You don't need to decide anything.

You don't need to change anything.

Just listen,

Breathe,

And know that you're not alone.

Let yourself settle into a position that feels right for your body.

You don't have to get it perfect.

You don't need to perform calmness.

You've been carrying so much,

Wearing so many faces,

Pushing through when no one sees the cost,

Not even you.

So here,

In this moment,

You don't need to hold anything together.

You don't have to explain,

Or justify,

Or smile.

Just breathe.

Just breathe.

Just breathe.

If your shoulders are tight,

Let them soften,

Just a little.

If your breath feels shallow,

Let it stretch,

Gently.

If your jaw has been clenched for days,

Let it go,

Slowly.

Let's take a breath together now.

Breathe in for a count of four.

And slowly exhale for eight,

As if you were breathing out through a straw.

Let's do it again.

In for four.

And out for eight.

This is your space.

No one is watching.

You can unravel safely.

Let your breath move through you.

Let your body feel supported.

You don't have to do anything right now.

You don't have to be anything.

You get to just be.

And you are so welcome here.

I see you.

I see you.

I see how much you've been questioning.

Quietly.

Silently.

And sometimes with guilt.

You're not even sure when it started.

That pull inside you.

That whisper that says,

Maybe this isn't how I want to live.

But the moment that thought forms,

Something inside shuts it down.

Quickly.

Sharply.

Slowly.

Because wanting more feels like betrayal.

You were taught to be grateful.

To be loyal.

To be the one who stays steady,

No matter how empty it feels inside.

And even now,

Even after everything,

You still hesitate to say it out loud.

Because,

What if you're just being dramatic?

What if it's all in your head?

What if they were right about you?

Too sensitive.

Too selfish.

Too much.

You've learned to second guess your own reality.

To rewrite your needs in softer ink.

To turn down your volume,

To keep yourself safe.

To hide in the shadows,

Emotionally,

Maybe even physically.

But you're tired,

Aren't you?

Tired of carrying a life that looks fine from the outside,

But feels like a quiet ache on the inside.

And still,

You feel guilty.

Because they're not cruel.

They say they're doing their best,

That you're just hard to please.

They say they love you,

Just as you are.

But maybe you need to lower your expectations.

And so the story rewrites itself again.

This must be your fault.

Your standards too high.

Your feelings too much.

You've been loved in a way that makes you small.

And your soul has been shrinking to survive.

But that ache inside you isn't a flaw.

It's a flare.

A signal that your soul is still alive.

And it's quietly asking for more.

What if wanting more doesn't make you ungrateful?

What if it makes you ready?

You've spent years contorting yourself into something easier for others to love.

And still,

It was never quite enough until you grew.

Because growth,

Especially for a woman,

Can feel like a threat to those who benefit from her smallness.

But let's name something gently here.

The problem isn't that you've changed.

The problem is that your change reveals their stuckness,

And that can make even kindness turn cold.

You are not selfish for wanting space to breathe.

You are not cold for noticing how often your needs get dismissed.

You are not cruel for wishing someone would meet you where you're going.

Not just where you've been.

You've been surviving in a story that said your worth was tied to what you could tolerate.

How quiet you could be.

How many crumbs you could turn into a feast.

But here's what's true.

You are always evolving.

You can't go back to who you used to be.

And why would you want to when you can become someone even more whole?

You are allowed to outgrow what you once settled for.

You are allowed to want things you never used to name.

You are allowed to say,

This is not enough for me anymore.

And yes,

You are allowed to say stop when something feels too much.

Too tight.

Too heavy.

Too wrong.

You are allowed to stop.

That is not failure.

That is safety.

That's not betrayal.

That's awakening.

There is no medal for making yourself smaller than your soul requires.

There is no honour in starving your heart to keep someone else comfortable.

You're not broken for wanting more.

You're remembering who you are.

Close your eyes if that feels okay.

And bring to mind a version of you not far away,

Not years from now,

But close.

Very close.

She's not perfect.

She hasn't figured it all out but she's no longer pretending.

She walks a little taller breathes a little deeper,

Laughs when she feels like it,

Cries when she needs to.

She's stopped apologising for the weather inside her.

This version of you started listening to the voice that whispers more.

She didn't run.

She didn't burn it all down.

She just stopped abandoning herself.

She let herself rest without earning it.

She let herself speak even if her voice shook.

She looked in the mirror and whispered,

Not this.

Can you see her?

Can you feel what it might be like to move toward her?

Without shame without rush just with curiosity.

This is not about becoming someone new.

It's about returning.

Peeling away what was never yours and honouring what's always been inside you.

The part that dreams.

The part that feels.

The part that's still alive even after everything.

Take a slow breath now and imagine this.

She turns to you this brave,

Present future you and she says it didn't happen all at once but one day I stopped shrinking I stopped handing away the best of me just to be loved and I chose myself gently,

Quietly fully.

She reaches for your hand not to pull you forward but to remind you she's already within you.

She always was.

Take a breath let it fill your body and then let it go there's no rush nothing you need to figure out,

Nothing you need to fix let your shoulders soften,

Let your belly be soft let your jaw unclench feel the weight of your body the steadiness beneath you the quiet within you let's take two grounding breaths together now,

Breathing in for four and breathe out for eight once more in for four and slowly out for eight when you're ready gently touch something grounding the floor,

Your clothing your heart you might want to gently shake out your hands or roll your shoulders back and forward or just stretch whatever part of you wants to move you've just done something powerful you gave yourself space you let yourself be seen you let yourself want that's enough and carry this with you,

You are not wrong for wanting more,

You are not broken for beginning again I hope this meditation landed with you in the way you needed it to,

I hope you feel just a little more seen,

A little more softened,

A little more you thank you for being here thank you for showing up,

You did something beautiful by pausing let that be enough