There's a feeling that most of us carry around constantly.
Men and women,
But we,
Almost never name it.
It's not sadness.
Not anger.
It's more like a background sense that something is wrong with you.
That you're too much or not enough,
That people would think differently of you if they really knew.
That you should be farther along by now.
That feeling has a name.
It's shame.
Before we go anywhere,
Let's make sure the body feels safe first.
Feet on the floor,
Hands resting easy.
Slow breath in through the nose.
Let it drop all the way down.
Than out,
Long and complete.
Notice if there's any tightness in your chest or stomach right now,
Any place that feels braced or defended.
One more and slowly.
10 out.
Nothing you feel in this practice makes you less.
You're just looking at something.
That's all.
Think about a recent moment where you felt that contraction.
Where you made yourself smaller,
Went quiet,
Felt suddenly aware that you might be judged.
Or caught yourself thinking,
I'm not doing this right,
I'm not enough here.
Let one moment come to mind.
Don't force it.
Where do you feel that in your body right now?
Stay there.
You don't have to change it.
Just notice it.
That feeling,
That pull inward,
Is what unnamed shame feels like in the body.
Shame is different from guilt.
Guilt says,
I did something wrong.
Shame says I am something wrong.
Distinction matters.
Because shame doesn't stay in one place,
It spreads.
It colours how you see yourself across everything.
It shows up as perfectionism trying to compensate.
As defensiveness because any criticism confirms what you already fear as distance.
Because if people get too close.
.
.
They might see it.
What belief about yourself?
Does that shame seem to be protecting?
The one you'd least want anyone else to know.
Take your time.
You don't have to name it out loud.
Just let yourself know it privately.
And is that belief actually true?
Or is it something you were made to feel at some point,
That you've been carrying ever since?
Here's what I want you to hold on to.
Shame survives by staying unnamed.
The moment you can look at it,
Even quietly,
Even just to yourself.
It starts to lose its grip.
Not because naming it fixes everything,
But because shame can't operate the same way in the light.
You're not what you're ashamed of.
You're the individual who was willing to look at it.
That's a different thing entirely.
One final breath in.
Then out.
Completely.
Feel the ground beneath you,
Still here,
Still steady.
Whatever came up today.
Let it sit with you gently.
No pressure to do anything with it right now.
You looked at something most never look at.
That matters.
Take your time coming back.
And remember this is deep work.
If you feel called,
Reach out.
I'd be honoured to witness your being and becoming.
